by Alexa Riley
“Your doctor is smoking hot, don’t you think?” she offers while applying some lip gloss.
I know what she’s doing. I actually get it. She’s trying to pretend that she isn’t doing this for him, because she hates him. No one understands that more than I do.
“I wasn’t paying much attention really, but’s he all yours,” I say, wondering if she’ll really make a play for him. For the past month she’s been dressing in the most provocative clothes she can find. She does her hair and make-up and then waits for Saint to show up, and he always shows up. On top of that, she’s been flirting with every guy within reach. Normally it leads to a giant fight that results in both Jeanette and Saint storming off.
“I just want to get out of here. This bed is hurting my ass,” I complain, wanting the nurse to hurry up with my discharge papers. These clinical blue walls are killing my eyes. All I really had was a bump on my head, so I was reluctant to go to the hospital at first but I wanted to make sure the baby was okay. I didn’t want to take the slightest risk so early in my pregnancy. The doctor said both the baby and I were fine. I hit my head on my steering wheel when I ran into a pole. Thank God I wasn’t going any faster when my brakes went out. I just have a bump that will probably turn a pretty purple by tomorrow.
Leaning over me, Jeanette pushes the call button to get someone to come to our room. Instead, a voice comes over the speaker
“Miss Matthews, what can I do for you?”
“She wants out of here is what you can do for her. You said you were doing the papers over an hour ago,” Jeanette says in the same no-bullshit tone she gives kids at library when they’re acting out.
“Just five more minutes and you’ll be on your way,” the nurse soothes before dropping the line.
“Ask and you shall receive, Lays,” Jeanette says graciously and starts to get all my stuff together.
“Do you think it’s weird that my brakes went out and my air bag didn’t go off?” I’ve been thinking this since the cops starting asking questions. I hate being scared. I thought I was passed that now.
“With Saint popping up everywhere like a fucking jack-in-the-box, I think you’re fine,” she responds and I’m not sure if she’s telling me the truth or trying to keep me calm. “Hey, I’ll stay with you if you like. We can have a little slumber party.”
“Nah, I just want to soak in a bath, maybe play the piano a little and then go to bed,” I reply. In truth I would love her to stay. I’ve felt so lonely since Carter left, which is insane because I only had him for one night. I’ve basically been alone my whole life, so I should be used to it. At night I keep dreaming about our time together. I’m pretty sure my pregnancy hormones are making it seem better than it really was. Yeah, keep telling yourself that, Layla. It was incredible.
I can see her studying me and I’m relieved when the nurse and doctor walk in before she can say something.
“Alrighty, Miss. Matthews, it looks like you’re good to go, but I did call and leave a message with your OBGYN and told them you’d be calling to make a follow-up appointment. If you need anything before then, feel free to give me a call.”
“Do you have a card or something?” Jeanette asks the attractive middle-aged doctor. Jeanette said he was hot, and while he’s easy on the eyes, he really isn’t her type. At all. She gravitates towards the dark, dangerous ones that look like they could snap you like a brittle twig. The doctor is handsome in more of a feminine kind of way. He’s got dark-blond hair that looks like it’s been carefully styled. He’s wearing his hospital scrubs and coat, but they are crisply pressed and obsessively neat. He and Jeanette would look like Ken and Barbie beside each other but I don’t think it’s meant to be. He’s too perfectly tailored for her.
“Sure,” he says, pulling a card out of his front pocket and trying to hand it to me. Before I can take it, Jeanette swipes from his hand.
“Mind if I use it?” she purrs coquettishly, giving him a look that has most men eating out of her hand. Between her looks and her boldness, I’ve never seen a man she couldn’t have by the balls.
“Anyti–” the doc is cut off by a loud growl and I know it’s Saint without having to look. He marches over and snatches the card from her hand.
“You’ll make the doc really fucking happy he’s already in the hospital you don’t knock that shit off,” Saint snarls and puts the card in his own pocket.
The doctor gives Saint a look of disdain before shaking his head and leaving the room, telling the nurse to discharge me. It’s probably wise he didn’t comment.
“Jerk! I’m never going to get laid with you stalking around. A woman has needs you know,” Jeanette snaps at him.
“Mama, you got needs? I’ve got a mouth and a cock right here to fulfill them. You’re going to get someone killed,” Saint barks, running his hands through his hair as if to calm himself down.
“What part of ‘drop dead’ aren’t you getting, Saint?” Jeanette asks.
“The part where every time you say it, your nipples get hard and I know for a fact your pussy is wet for me. If we weren’t in a hospital right now and if I didn’t have shit to do, I would show you.”
“Fuck off,” she responds and turns to me, dismissing him. She must be pretty pissed because normally she likes to go toe to toe with him for a good fifteen minutes.
“You ready?” she asks.
I’m still watching Saint because I don’t care how mad she is at him, that was still pretty freaking hot. I’m surprised she hasn’t cracked yet. I’m still pissed at the guy but there’s just something about him that makes you like him. He’s scary as shit when he wants to be, but he’s always quick to crack a joke or try to lighten the mood. But although he and Carter differ in that sense, they’re too alike for it not to hurt to be around Saint.
“Yeah, just give me a sec,” I say. I slip into the bathroom and change out of my hospital gown.
When I come out, Saint is alone and leaning up against the door.
“Sorry, I might have said some shit and she left. I told her I was taking you home and it was non-negotiable.” I can see the sorrow in his eyes. It makes me envious. Saint is here and trying like hell to get Jeanette to take him back. Must be nice to have someone fight to be with you.
Throwing the rest of my stuff into the hospital bag, Saint takes it and we walk quietly to his car. When we’re almost home, my phone goes off with a message from Jeanette.
Jeanette: Sorry I had to get away from him. Home safe. You need anything?
Me: Nope, I’m almost home. Going to take a long bath and go to bed. Talk to you tomorrow. Love you.
Jeanette: Love you too xoxo
“She get home okay?” Saint asks.
“Yeah. Just give her more time.”
“I’m a patient man, Layla, but my patience is starting to wear thin.” This breaks my heart a little. As much as I’m still angry at Saint for keeping tabs on me in secret for Carter, I hate seeing two people that could be together hurting for one another. I can’t and won’t draw parallels with my situation with Carter. He doesn’t want me, but these two could be together if they truly wanted it. I know Jeanette still wants him but she’s just holding back.
“Don’t give up on her, Saint. She needs someone like you.”
“I know she does but I never said I was giving up. Just that my patience is running thin and she might not like it when I snap. I’m letting her play her games for now because it makes her think she’s in control and I know she needs that.”
I look over at him and really take him in. He’s always dirty-mouthed and crude, but he’s so much more observant than I realized.
Pulling into my driveway, Saint hops out of the car to walk around and open my car door.
“Let me do a house check, it will make me feel better,” he says. I know he’s not asking but I want him to as well. It will make me feel better after everything that’s happened today. I’m still anxious at the possibility, no matter how remote, that someone tried to hurt
me. It makes me worry about Carter too.
“He’s fine. I talked to him today,” Saint says, confirming that he really is more observant than I had given him credit for.
“Thank you,” I say, opening the door and letting him in the house. It doesn’t take long for him to go through my little place, and I notice he seems to know his way around. I wait for him at the door and don’t comment, because I don’t want to know why he knows my house so well.
“Looks all clear. I’ll check around the outside before I head out,” he says while walking out.
“Thanks, Saint.”
“I’m glad you’re okay. I know you don’t believe me, but Carter would have lost it if you were hurt.”
“I don’t want to talk about him anymore, Saint. I get that you want to get back with Jeanette, but can we leave any and all mentions of Carter out of it? I’ve moved on.”
“Got it,” he says, not quite believing me. “Lock the door and set the alarm. Later, Layla.” He leaves and shuts the door behind him. I make sure he doesn’t see my eye roll. I’ve lived on my own for four years and I know how to take care myself.
I lock down the house and head for my bathroom. I opt to take a hot shower instead of a bath. All I want is to wash away the hospital smell. I don’t bother to dress and just throw on my pink fluffy robe and grab my Kindle. My tummy rumbles loudly and I realize I haven’t eaten today. I don’t feel like making anything, so I just order Chinese.
I’m getting to a really juicy part in my book when the doorbell rings, making me jump. Figuring it’s my takeout, I grab my wallet, turn off the alarm and open the door.
“That’s how you open a fucking door, Cherry?” Carter growls. I jump back in shock and end up tripping over my own feet, falling flat on my ass.
My heart starts pounding at the sound of his voice. Looking up at him, I see his face is set in a hard glare and his jaw is tightly clenched. He’s just a big as I remember, but I swear his effect on me is magnified. After all, now I know how he kisses, what his hands feel like as they caress my skin, how it feels to be owned by him.
Instantly he’s on me, lifting me off the floor like I weigh nothing. I automatically wrap my arms and legs around him to keep from falling. Kicking the door closed with his foot, he walks to the couch, dropping down on to it so I end up straddling him. I know I should be screaming and yelling at him, but my body just clings to his, and I bury my face in his neck. I felt scared all day and I finally feel safe again. It’s as if he’s taken all my worries away with just his presence.
That’s when it hits me. My moment of relief is swept away by sadness and jealousy. All I can smell on him is cheap women's perfume. I lose it. Angrily, I push myself off his lap. God! To think I curled myself around him like a loyal puppy. Here I am clinging to him, and he’s spent his night with another woman? What happened to all that “I’m yours, and you're mine bullshit”? I swear I can feel my tattoo of his name burning my skin.
“You stink, Carter. You smell like another woman. I understand that you don’t want to be with me, but, Jesus, have some compassion.”
“It’s not what you think, Cherry,” Carter says softly. He starts to rise and I hold my hand out, not wanting him to get up. He looms over me, filling my entire field of vision. He’s easily over a foot taller than me, and right now I need to be on the same level as him.
“I don’t believe you. See, you have this problem of lying to me and running away. You’re just that kind of man it seems,” I throw the words at him as my anger gets the best of me.
“Never lied to you,” he clips.
“Doesn’t matter. I don’t want to fight about this and I’m done crying. I’m letting you go,” I say forcefully. Maybe if I’m forceful enough with my words, even I’ll believe them.
“You’re letting me go?” he says in a tone that implies I’ve lost it. Maybe I have. God, why does he have to be so beautiful?
I tear my eyes away from him and shift my gaze to my feet. “I can’t justify this to myself anymore. I fight with myself trying to rationalize your actions. I go over and over everything that happened between us in my head. I’m driving myself crazy. Every time I give myself over to you, it’s just a waste of my love. Leave me alone, Carter.” I put my hand over my belly and his eyes go there. “Leave us alone. Please.”
I wish I could sound more commanding, more convincing but I can’t. I feel my shoulders drop in defeat and I close my eyes tightly
The silence is deafening.
Chapter 3
Carter
Did she just say “us”? She didn’t just say “us”. Did she?
I look up at Layla as she stands over me and I see her shoulders start to shake. I watch in horror as tear start to run down her cheeks.
“No, no, no, no, no,” I chant, standing and picking her up again. “Don’t cry, baby, please don’t cry.”
I’m making my way to her room with her in my arms when the doorbell rings. “Who the fuck is that?” I ask.
“Crap. That’s the Chinese I ordered,” Layla says hoarsely.
“I’ll take care of it,” I tell her and put her down. I walk to the door, open it up and see the young guy holding the food. I grab some bills out of my pocket and shove them in his hand, mumbling a “thanks” as I grab the food and slam the door in his face. I flip the lock, set the alarm, and then throw the food in the fridge. I stalk over to my girl as she watches me warily and pick her back up.
“I can walk you know,” she sniffles.
I ignore her protest and carry her across the room and down the small hallway to her bedroom. I can’t handle her tears and seeing her upset breaks my heart.
I take her into her room and set her down gently on the edge of the bed. I straighten and gaze at her small body. I feel my protective instincts overwhelm me.
“Cherry, baby, look at me,” I demand. I know she needs me take control. It’s how we work, and now is no different. She looks up at me with big watery eyes and it’s all I can do not to break down with her. These past months apart from her have torn me to pieces inside. Seeing her push me away is enough to end me. I reach down pull my shirt off. I need to get this fucking stink off of me, and get my girl’s scent where it should be – on me.
She looks at my bare chest and then back at my eyes. “Cherry, I will explain everything to you. I swear. But right now, you need to explain what you meant by ‘us’.”
She breaks eye contact and looks out the window. “Don’t pretend like you don’t know, Carter. I’m sure Saint went and tattled to you the day he found out. It’s fine. Whatever. The baby and I didn’t need you three months ago and we sure as hell don’t need you now.”
Her words send me over the edge and I fall to my knees in front of her. “Baby?” I whisper.
She looks at me, confusion written all over her face.
“You didn’t know?” she asks, tentatively. Hope creeps across her beautiful face. She reaches her hand out to touch me but then stops herself and lets it drop to her side. Seeing her stop herself from touching me hurts more than if she had smacked me.
For the first time in my life I feel tears well in my eyes. “A baby,” I whisper again and let my head fall in her lap. She’s wearing only a bathrobe and it comes undone with the movement. If this is going to be the first time in my life I cry, I don’t want her to watch me do it. I didn't even cry when I lost my parents. I wrap my arms around her waist and bury my face against her belly. “My baby,” I gasp, and feel warm tears on my cheek.
Layla starts rubbing my head and shoulders and I feel her starting to cry too. “You really didn’t know? God, Carter, I thought you didn’t want me. Where have you been? Why did you leave me? I’ve been miserable without you.”
“Cherry. Just give me a second to feel this. I’ll tell you everything. I just want to have this moment. Please.” I hear my voice crack.
I’m on my knees, holding her naked body to my bare chest for what feels like forever. I hear her laugh a little and sniff,
and I know she’s enjoying this moment too. I move my head so my lips are against her belly and start to speak. “Hey, little guy, I’m your dad. I love you and your mom so much.” I kiss her soft belly once and lean back to look at her. She has a huge smile on her face and I finally feel like my world is complete. Who would have thought my path of vengeance would have led me to what was taken from me?
“‘Little guy?’ It’s a bit soon to know what we’re having, Carter.”
“A man can dream, can’t he? You’re here, so my first dream came true.”
Cherry rolls her eyes at my lame joke, but I know she’s eating it up. I reach up and rub her leftover tears away and kiss each cheek. I move my arms down and push her robe off her shoulders.
“Carter, wait. I want to talk first,” she says, and makes a move to cover herself up.
“Cherry, my love, it’s been three months since I tasted your honey. I’ll talk, but it’s gonna be muffled.”
Layla laughs and lets me finish taking off her robe. Once she’s completely naked, I stand up and get out of my jeans and boots as quickly as possible. I look at her beautiful naked body before me, and I notice something on her ribs.
“What’s on your side, Layla?”
I see the red spread across her cheeks and I feel like she’s hiding something. I get closer and move her arm out of the way, so I can see what’s on her perfect body. That’s when I see it. My name tattooed on her ribs in black ink.
“Oh, Cherry. Why would you mark your beautiful body with my name? I’m not worthy of this.”
“I got it the day I woke up and you were gone. I knew that no matter what you’d always be a part of me. I wanted to have a physical representation of what I carry in my heart.”
I lean down and kiss the tattoo of my name. I trace it lightly with my fingers and kiss it again. I know I don’t deserve this from her but seeing my name on her, knowing she put it there makes me feel ten-feet tall.
“Thank you, baby, I love it. And I love you.”