“Were you really attracted to me, then? Or were you just trying to make Royce jealous?”
Ivy sat at the edge of Camden’s bed and slumped her shoulders. “No … I don’t know. Maybe.”
“What about your husband, Ivy? I like him. He seems like a good guy.”
She nodded. “He is a good man, and he loves me. But I don’t love him, Camden. He doesn’t even know the real me. He thinks I’m just his beautiful church wife. He doesn’t know who I really am. He doesn’t satisfy me.”
“Look, I’m not getting in that, Ivy. You and your husband need to go to counseling or something, but leave me out of it. I will pray for you all.”
“I’m so sorry about what Dr. Rae said, Camden. Do you want me to try and fix it? I will,” Ivy said.
Camden shook his head. “No. I don’t. Don’t worry about it. I know the truth, my woman knows the truth, and God knows.”
“I guess I should go,” Ivy said as she rose to her feet.
“You should. I wasn’t kidding when I said I would pray for you and your husband. You should tell him how you feel, though. Don’t let him be in the dark about it.”
Ivy nodded. “I would hug you, but I don’t know if that would be appropriate.”
Camden smiled and held up his fist. “You can give me a fist bump.”
“Really?” Ivy chuckled.
Camden wiggled his fist. “Don’t leave me hanging.”
Ivy lifted her arm and tapped Camden’s fist with hers. “Can we still be friends?” she asked.
“As long as you keep your lips and your hugs to yourself,” Camden said.
“You don’t trust me?”
“I do not.”
Ivy smiled sadly. “I deserve that, and I want you to know it hurt me so bad when you said I disrespected you. I didn’t mean to do that to you.”
“It’s okay … really.”
Ivy waved at Camden as he showed her out of his room. Royce’s timing was perfect, because he happened to be walking down the hall as Camden opened the door.
“Oh!” Royce said.
Camden threw both hands in the air. “It’s not what you think. We just had our come-to-Jesus moment about the whole Dr. Rae thing.”
Royce nodded. “Not my business. I didn’t see anything.”
“Royce …” The longing in Ivy’s voice was so real. Camden didn’t know why he hadn’t noticed it before.
Royce kept walking past Ivy and down the hall. “I hope you apologized, Ivy,” Royce called from the other room.
Ivy’s eyes watered again. “See you later, Camden.”
“Okay.”
Camden showed Ivy to the door and then went looking for Royce. He found him in the kitchen making a sandwich. From the smell of the bacon and the lettuce and tomato out on the counter, Camden assumed it was a BLT.
“That bacon smells good,” Camden said.
“Applewood, man. Straight from the farm. From organically fed pigs. It’s incredible.”
Camden sat on one of the kitchen bar stools. “So, Ivy told me about y’all.”
Royce chuckled. “I figured she would at some point. Ivy is so predictable.”
“What happened? She said it was before you got married, so …”
“I didn’t love her. She was my protégée, and I crossed the line, plain and simple. I wish I hadn’t, because she fell in love.”
“But you still deal with her? How’s that work?”
“It’s business. She’s incredibly talented. But I made sure to never cross the line again. Don’t let her cross the line with you.”
“Oh, no. I won’t. I’m good. I don’t want to mess up what I have with Dawn.”
Royce smiled. “Good, because between me and you, Ivy is crazy.”
“Man …”
Camden felt bad for Ivy, so he didn’t want to join in on Royce’s bashing of her. As much as Camden wanted to stay angry at her, he pitied her. Whether she was crazy or not, she was clearly hurting.
“Did she apologize?”
“She did. I accepted it, and so I’m ready to move on and finish her record.”
“Her stuff might be on hold because I think I’m ready to start with Spirited’s record.”
Royce assembled his sandwich and Camden waited for him to elaborate.
“So, God gave me this theme for the album. The theme is ‘A move of God.’ So many people go to church services, conferences, and everything else because they’re trying to feel God move. We’re going to give them that Holy Spirit experience with this music. They’re going to feel His presence in their cars, showers, wherever they turn it on.”
“I love it,” Camden said. “I can’t wait to get started on it.”
“Get ready. You might want to bring your girlfriend in this weekend. They just finished up the show in Miami and killed it again.”
“I think with the radio play that’s just starting, the single will go to number one on the Billboard chart. What do you think?”
Royce nodded. “Yep. I agree. You know how gospel records take a minute to burn up the charts, but it’ll stay on there forever.”
“This is all a dream, man. It really is. We’ve worked so hard and now it’s finally paying off.”
“Everything in God’s time, Camden.”
Camden believed that God was opening these doors and finally giving the music a chance to be heard by the world.
“You know, Ivy was right about your voice, Camden. You should really be singing.”
“I do. In the studio. I’m just not much of a performer. I just like singing in front of my piano or maybe at Bible study or something. I’m not an artist.”
“Okay. Your choice. But if you change your mind, you know you can always sing with Spirited.”
“If I decide to sing, I’ll sing with my own group,” Camden said with a chuckle.
“Oh, my bad!” Royce said. “You do have your own group.”
“Yep.”
“So let me run something by you. The record label wants to maybe add another female to So G.I.F.T.E.D. Maybe a soprano who can lead. Dawn is a great soprano on backgrounds, but she’s not really a lead vocalist.”
“Let’s wait until they’re done with this promo tour, and then we can discuss it. I’m open to it, but I don’t want them to think I’m making the decision without their input.”
“Oh, yeah, I forgot. You guys collaborate on everything.”
Camden cracked up laughing while Royce devoured his sandwich. Royce ran his group with an iron fist. No one had a voice except him, but it worked for them. Spirited trusted Royce to make hits and to sell a lot of records, and at the end of the day that was what mattered for them. So G.I.F.T.E.D was family and they made decisions in that way. Maybe after they actually sold a substantial number of records, they would make decisions like Royce and his group.
Talking about them to Royce reminded Camden how much he missed his brothers (’cause he counted Akil as a brother too), sister, and his woman. Royce was right. It was time for a visit, but not in Dallas. He needed everyone to see him in his element in Atlanta. He wanted them to be proud. And maybe they’d go home and share the victory with Pastor Wilson. Perhaps he’d find a reason to be proud too.
CHAPTER 29
After the Miami trip, Blaine had avoided Dawn. Mostly because he wished that he could take what they did back. He’d taken Dawn’s virginity, though, and that couldn’t be restored. There was no turning back the hands of time on that, but he didn’t have to let her think there would be something more than that one night.
And she did think there would be more. Dawn had blown up Blaine’s cell phone with texts and calls for the two weeks they’d been back in town. He hadn’t responded to any of them. It felt like the cold turkey approach was best. Since they were done touring and he was in Oklahoma City every Sunday, there would be space between them, and there would be time to get over him.
But now Amber was banging on his apartment door like the police, so Blaine guessed the cat was
out the bag.
“Blaine, if you don’t open up this door, I swear I’m going to kick it in!” Amber said.
Blaine considered his options. He could pretend that he wasn’t home, but at least if he let them in, he could control the situation. It would be better to let Amber have a meltdown in his apartment than at church, because she wasn’t beneath doing that.
Blaine sighed and got up to open the door. Before he could get there, Amber was banging again.
When he swung the door open, Amber dragged a crying Dawn into the apartment.
“Sit down!” Amber yelled at Dawn.
“Look. Don’t come over here with all this ghetto hollering and screaming,” Blaine said. “I don’t want to hear it.”
“Blaine, first of all, you do not want to say anything to me. You do not. I am five seconds away from committing capital murder when it comes to you. Like, for real.”
“Ain’t nobody scared of you.”
“You ought to be. Shut up talking to me. Dawn … tell him.”
“B-but I’m not sure. I’m not sure, Amber. Calm down.”
Blaine got a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. “Tell me what?”
“Tell. Him.”
Dawn’s hands shook frantically as she spoke. “I didn’t get my period. It was supposed to come a couple days after we got back from Miami, and I didn’t get it.”
“It’s been two weeks. Maybe it’s just late.”
“I hope that’s what it is, but it’s never late. I’ve never been late.” Dawn sounded so stressed that he knew she wasn’t making this up.
Blaine felt his knees buckle at the thought of Dawn being pregnant by him. He took the closest seat, a chair at his dining room table.
“Maybe your cycle is off because you had sex. That’s probably what it is,” Blaine said.
“You mean her cycle is off because your hoish self stole her virginity,” Amber said.
Blaine held one hand up. “Hey! I didn’t steal anything. She gave it to me. She begged me for it.”
“And you just couldn’t turn down a piece of tail? You disgust me.”
“You just mad it was Dawn and not you,” Blaine said.
Amber scoffed. “I suggest you get a full STD test when you do go to the doctor. Ain’t no telling what this Petri dish is carrying. I’m surprised your vagina didn’t start melting on contact.”
“Amber, you are being very rude right now,” Blaine said. “We can talk about this if you want to, but you need to check your attitude. It’s not helping anything.”
Dawn seemed to calm a little bit, and look hopeful. That was not the effect Blaine was going for.
“Y-you haven’t called me since we got back,” Dawn said. “Do you hate me now?”
“Nah, I don’t hate you. But in order for us to move forward, we can’t acknowledge this. We need to act like it never happened.”
“Well, since your swimmers decided to hit the mark, I don’t think that’s really possible,” Amber said. “You need to man up, call your brother and confess. Then I don’t know what you’re gonna do after that. I guess you gonna be a pastor-slash-baby daddy.”
Calling Camden was the last thing Blaine planned on doing.
“Camden doesn’t need to know about this. It’ll break his heart. If you are pregnant, Dawn, I’ll help you do what you need to do about it, and then you and Camden can still get married and live happily ever after.”
“B-but I thought you thought he was gay too,” Dawn said. “Why would I still want to marry him?”
Amber exploded. She ran back and forth in front of Blaine screaming, “Oh my God! Oh my God!”
“Girl, calm down!” Blaine said.
“You did not seriously try to act like your justification for sleeping with Camden’s girl is that there is a gay rumor about him. You know good and well Camden isn’t gay.”
“Then why doesn’t he want me?” Dawn asked. “I’ve been telling him for months that I’m ready, and he keeps talking about our wedding night, but then he never sets the date.”
“I almost want to slap your stupid self too,” Amber said. “How about the fact that Camden respects you? He loves you. He cherishes you. And you messed it up for no reason.”
“It doesn’t have to be messed up,” Blaine reiterated. “Camden never has to know about this. Dawn, if you think he’s gay then just move on quietly. He’ll understand. Just leave me out of it.”
“Leave you out of it?” Amber screamed. “You are the starter and finisher of this mess. You can’t be left out of it, no matter how badly you want to be. You’re in it.”
“Okay, so what do you think I should be doing about it exactly?” Blaine asked.
The conversation had already wearied Blaine. He wanted to prepare for his weekend visits to Oklahoma City. Regina had prepared a list of questions he’d probably be asked by the potential church members. He wanted to memorize that.
“I think you should be comforting her, Blaine, since it was your errant man part that got her in this predicament. And I think you need to stand up and take responsibility for your baby.”
“Whoa. Whoa! Whoa! You can chill with all that your baby stuff. We don’t even know for sure if there even is a baby, and now you’re giving me responsibility for it?”
“She took an early pregnancy test. It was positive,” Amber said. “So there is a baby. You’re just in denial about that.”
“Look, you can just go visit Camden in Atlanta, seduce him and pass the baby off as his.”
“What makes you think he’ll want me this time, and not after all the other times I tried to give him some?” Dawn asked.
“All right, King David. You gonna put Camden on the front line of the next battle too?” Amber said, her tone angry and vile.
“She’s not his wife yet. She’s not even sure that he wants her,” Blaine said.
This made Dawn cry harder. “I am so stupid,” she wailed.
“Yes, you are,” Amber said. “You two are just a bucket of dumb and dumber.”
But then, as if Amber had a brief moment of empathy, she sat down next to Dawn and put her arm around her.
“Don’t worry. Blaine is going to do the right thing.”
As Blaine stared at Dawn in her broken state, he wanted to do the right thing. The only problem was, he wasn’t quite sure what that was.
CHAPTER 30
Blaine wished he could be anywhere but in his father’s study sharing the worst news ever. But he didn’t think anyone could fix this mess except Pastor Wilson.
“So, son, how does it feel to have a number one record?” Pastor Wilson asked.
Blaine hadn’t even had time to celebrate their number one. His life was too busy falling apart to care about So G.I.F.T.E.D. He’d gotten his brother’s woman pregnant. It was the lowest thing he could’ve ever done. He wished he could take it back. He wished Dawn would get an abortion. He wished he had a time machine.
Anything but having this mess in his lap.
“The number one is great, Dad, but I need to talk to you about something.”
Pastor Wilson seemed to sense that something was awry. “What’s the matter, son? Regina giving you any trouble?”
Blaine bit his bottom lip and widened his eyes. He’d forgotten about Regina. She was going to be an additional nightmare to contend with.
“No, it’s not Regina.”
“Then what is it? Don’t keep me in suspense. I have a meeting with Delores and Stephen later.”
Blaine gave his father an unblinking stare. His and Delores’s meetings were an issue. Blaine had known about those meetings since he was a little boy. And since neither Delores nor First Lady Rita was going anywhere, apparently, they had a workable situation.
Blaine didn’t have that with Regina. There would be nothing workable about him having a baby with Dawn. He couldn’t even imagine telling her, much less her accepting it and moving on.
“Dad, Dawn is pregnant,” Blaine blurted out.
“What?
Well, I told Camden if he didn’t put a ring on that girl’s finger she was going to go out and find someone else. We’ll have to replace her in the group, though. Can’t have an unwed pregnant girl in a singing group.”
Blaine shook his head. His father had gone straight into fixer mode without hearing the entire story.
“Dad …”
Pastor Wilson raised his eyebrows. “Wait. Was it Camden? Did Camden get her pregnant? Well, my Lord. I didn’t think he’d do it. Might just be my son after all. Dawn is pretty and thick. I’m surprised he lasted this long. How far along is she?”
Blaine looked at the floor. He wished his father would stop cutting him off so he could just tell him.
“The baby isn’t Camden’s.”
“What?”
Blaine cleared his throat. “The baby isn’t Camden’s. It’s mine.”
The pen that Pastor Wilson held in his hand clattered to the floor. His face looked frozen, the creases on the sides of his mouth downturned in horror. Like a mask intended to terrify someone.
“You slept with Camden’s fiancée? What in the hell were you thinking?”
“I-I wasn’t thinking at all. It just happened, really. Dawn and I heard those gay rumors about Camden and didn’t know what to believe.”
“What gay rumors?” Pastor Wilson asked as beads of sweat gathered on his forehead.
“A woman in Atlanta accused him of being gay because he wouldn’t sleep with her.”
“When was someone going to tell me about this?” Pastor Wilson asked.
Blaine shrugged. “Not my business to tell. I’m trying to tell you mine.”
“One of my sons is queer and the other one can’t keep his hands to himself. Lord help me.”
Blaine sat quietly, wondering what would come next. He could sometimes read his father and tell what he was thinking, but this time he drew a blank.
A single tear trickled down his father’s face. “All I’ve ever done is groom the two of you for greatness. You’ve had nothing but the best, seen nothing but the best, lived the best. I can’t believe this.”
Blaine shifted in his seat. Pastor Wilson only seemed to remember the positive things about their upbringing. He obviously didn’t remember his drinking or his womanizing.
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