by Kacee Kupser
Prologue – Brenna
“God damn, son of a bitch!” I wipe my mouth after puking my brains out for the fifth day in a row. I didn’t want to admit that it was a possibility, but all the symptoms are there. I can’t stand the smell of coffee, one of my favourite things in the world, I puke every morning, my breasts are tender, and my period is late. I’m never late, my periods have been like clockwork since I was 16 and went on the pill.
I sat beside the toilet until my stomach stopped rumbling and slowly got up to get changed. I have noticed that I need to put off brushing my teeth or else I’ll be right back to hovering over the toilet bowl.
It’s going to make me late for work, but I’m going to stop at the pharmacy and pick up a pregnancy test, or four. I work as a pediatric nurse at the local hospital, but I don’t want to get tested there, the news would fly around the hospital like a wild fire. I’m quite certain that I’m pregnant, but I don’t want anyone knowing until I’ve freaked out and then figured out what I’m going to do.
As I get in my car I check my phone and notice that I’ve got three missed calls and six text messages from Everly. She’s my best friend and we don’t go a day without at least touching base. Bringing up her number, I give her a call as I pull out of my driveway, without even looking at the messages.
“Where the hell have you been bitch? I was about ready to get Joker to come over and make sure you were okay.”
I laughed at her drama, but that’s just the way we were with each other. “I know, I know. I’m sorry. I’ve not been feeling well so I went to sleep early last night and I turned my ringer off so that I could sleep.”
“Next time give your girl a heads up. You know I panic if I can’t talk to you!” I can hear Everly moving around as she talks to me. Her boyfriend, Joker, is growling at her to get her ass back into bed. They’ve been going hot and heavy since they got together and I wouldn’t be surprised if wedding bells weren’t in their near future.
“I will. I’m off tomorrow, why don’t we get together for dinner and you can tell me all that I’ve missed in the five days since we last saw each other.”
“You are on!”
I’m nervous about seeing her. The baby’s dad is Joker’s best friend Beast and I’m not ready for him to know about the baby until I figure out what I want to do. I can’t tell Everly because she’ll be all excited and want to tell Joker who would tell Beast, so that’s a no go.
I suddenly realized that Everly was still talking to me and I had missed what she was saying. “I’m sorry, Ev, I’ve got to go. I’m going to be late for work. I’ll see you tomorrow night. Love ya.”
“Love ya too. See you tomorrow night.”
Chapter 1 – Beast
Walking into the clubhouse I see my best friend Joker over in the corner playing pool with Hawk. He had texted me the night before asking for a meeting, so after grabbing a beer from Nick at the bar I walked over to the table to catch up with my brothers before Joker and I have our meeting.
“Hey brothers, how’s it going?”
Joker finished taking his shot and looked up at me with a grin. “It’s fan-fucking-tastic brother. Let me just finish up this game, I’m about to take down Hawk, and then we can go talk in your office.”
Looking over at Hawk he had a scowl on his face. He is competitive as shit and looking at the table I can see he’s getting his ass kicked.
“Hawk, brother, what’s going on man? Joker is a shit player, how the hell is he beating you?”
Shaking his head at me, Hawk walks around the table and lines up his shot. “I don’t know man, it’s like he suddenly woke up with skills.”
“Well, finish your game boys and I’ll see you in my office when you’re done Joker. Got some work to get done.”
Turning, I walked down the hall to my office, saying hi to the brothers and club whores as I walk by. I loved being part of our Club, but doing the paperwork that came with it was not my favourite part. Being president, it’s something that I just have to do, but I put it off as much as possible. The unfortunate part about that is now I have a shit ton of work to do and can’t put it off any longer.
I closed the door behind myself to cut off the sound coming from the bar. Thankfully my office is soundproof so that I can work in peace.
I’d been sitting at my desk going over reports given to me by our club treasurer Techy. Usually I can get through this quickly, but thoughts of Brenna keep going through my head. We’ve only been together once, but I can’t seem to get her out of my head. We were planning on spending a second night together, which never happens with me, but Everly’s car was vandalized and that broke up our night. I haven’t heard from her since.
A knock at my door had me looking up, “Come in.” Joker walked through with a smile on his face and a swagger to his walk.
“Looks like someone is having a good day. What’s up brother, what did you need to meet about?”
“Beast man, you have no idea. It’s been a great couple of weeks. When Everly went missing, I thought my life was over, but when we got her back I decided life is too short to put shit off.”
“That’s great man. Does this mean you’re finally going to give your woman her kutte?” Before Everly went missing I called for a vote to make her Joker’s old lady and it was passed unanimously.
“More than that, I’m going to make her my wife.”
“Holy shit!” I didn’t think that either Joker or I would ever get ourselves an old lady, let alone a wife.
“Yeah man, it’s time. I’m wanting to do it at a family BBQ. I thought I would get Queenie to present her with the Kutte and when she turned back to me I would ask her to marry me.”
“Wow, you’ve actually thought this all through. What do you need from me?”
Joker shrugged and looked me straight in the eye, like he was trying to gauge my reaction. “Just wanted to run it by you Pres. I’m wanting to do it sooner than later. I know that Queenie already has the kutte ready to go, now I just need to get the BBQ set. I’m looking at doing it this weekend. Do you have Brenna’s number? I want to invite her without Red knowing.”
I pick up my phone and go through my contacts. Clicking on Brenna’s information I send it to Joker in a text message. When his phone pinged he looked at it and started laughing at me.
“What’s got you laughing?” I looked back at my phone and realized that I don’t have her listed as Brenna in my phone, I have her listed as Baby Girl, which is what I call her.
Looking back up, Joker was shaking his head and smiling at me. “Oh brother, she’s got you locked up already.”
“Bullshit man, no such thing. I haven’t seen her since I brought her to your house. You know I’m a one and done kind of guy.”
Even as the words came out of my mouth, I knew I was spouting bullshit. There was something about Brenna that pulled me to her, but I wasn’t going to be chasing her. If she wants me then she’ll have to come to me.
“Sure brother keep telling yourself that,” says Joker, laughing at me, while walking out of the office.
Once Joker was out of my office and had closed the door, I tried to get back to my paperwork, but I just couldn’t concentrate. I needed to get laid, but none of the club whores could get me hard, and trust me I’d tried.
Since I couldn’t seem to concentrate enough to get anything done, I decided to go for a ride to try to clear my head.
Most people just don’t understand the feeling of freedom when on a bike. The feel of wind on your face, the sense of calm you get where no one and nothing can touch you. It’s the best thing besides fucking to clear my head and since fucking isn’t an option, I was going to ride Brenna out of my head.
Heading out through the
clubhouse, Joker was no longer there, but Hawk was now on the couch with one of the club whores, Scarlett, who was taking him down her throat while he sat back and enjoyed. One of the things I’d always loved about club life is that you are free to be the real you and experience life the way you want, not the way society dictates.
When I got outside of the clubhouse, the sun was shining and my baby was sitting there waiting for me to take her for a ride. I had no set location in mind, I just got on my bike and rode.
I’d been on my bike for half an hour and when I pulled over to the side of the road I noticed that I was in front of Brenna’s house. Even when I was out trying to clear my head, I couldn’t get her out of my mind.
Her badass black Dodge Charger wasn’t parked in front of her house, so she was obviously out, most likely at work. Probably a good thing or else who knows what I would have done, most likely something stupid, like knock on her door and fuck her hard against the wall.
Since going for a ride didn’t clear my head I pulled back out onto the road and headed home to drink enough to pass out and hopefully actually sleep through the night for the first time in weeks.
Chapter 2 - Brenna
Running onto the Pediatric Ward, I flew past the nurse’s station where my work husband, Cody, looked up at me and just shook his head at me with a smile on his face. I entered the staff locker room and threw my purse and bag full of pregnancy tests in my locker before dashing back out to clock in. When I picked up my time card I noticed that I had already been signed in, obviously Cody had my back, again.
“Bitch, you are late again.” Cody said with a chuckle.
“I know, I know, it couldn’t be helped this time. I had to make a very important stop on my way in.”
Cody looked me up and down before responding. “Is there something you need to tell me? You look like shit and you have been late every day for a week, which is just not you.”
Damnit, some days it sucked ass to have friends who knew and loved you so bloody well. “As of right now, I have nothing to tell you. Ask me again after my break.”
With that I grabbed the first patient chart waiting for me and walked off, letting him stew on that. I knew he was going to be up my ass as soon as I got back to the nurses station so I needed to keep busy.
The first patient I was checking in on is a 5-year-old boy named Brandon who was in for his annual check up. He was born with an atrial septal defect, otherwise known as a hole in his heart and he came in every year for a full work up to make sure that the hole wasn’t getting any bigger. It wasn’t that uncommon and as long as we kept an eye on him he could live a long and productive life.
“Good morning Brandon, how are you doing today buddy?”
Brandon was watching a movie on his iPad while his mom, Ava, sat beside him reading from her Kindle. They were in here every year and so we had gotten to know each other well.
Ava put her Kindle down and reached over to tap Brandon on the shoulder. Like most kids I’d seen he had a tendency to get caught up in whatever he was watching and wouldn’t even respond to his name.
Brandon looked up from his iPad and when he saw me he got a giant smile on his face. It’s one of the best parts of my job. No matter how sick they were, kids almost always had a way of finding happiness in the world and anything I could do to help keep that happiness going, I would.
“Miss. Brenna, you’re here! I was waiting and waiting and waiting and you didn’t come. Momma said that you’d be here, but I was worried,” he said with a pout.
“Oh buddy, do you really think I’d miss my time with you? I love seeing you, so don’t you worry, nothing would have kept me away. How are you feeling bud?”
I could see Ava smiling off to the side and grabbing the iPad since Brandon was now bouncing up and down on his bed eager to tell me what is going on in his life.
“Well Miss Brenna, I started kindergarten this year and it is sooooo much fun. I gots all these new friends and I get to do art and the recess and oh so many things.”
“That’s great buddy. What’s your favourite part about kindergarten?”
While Brandon starting telling me all about his favourite thing to do in kindergarten, recess, I went over his vitals, taking his blood pressure, listening to his heart and lungs. By the time I was finished I could tell he was getting tired and so I told him that I would see him soon and he could tell me more about how much fun school was.
Ava picked up his iPad and gave it back to him and followed me out of the room. “Hey Brenna, how’s it going?”
“Oh you know Ava, it’s life, come to work, hang out with my friends when I can, do errands, and repeat. How about you? Sounds like it’s been an eventful year.”
The smile on Ava’s face said it all. She was a single mom who was working her ass off to raise her boy after her husband was killed in a car accident on his way home from work one night before Brandon was born. Even through all her hardships and Brandon’s medical problems, she loved her little boy and loved her life.
“Oh yeah, you heard my boy in there, everything is going great. He’s loving school and I’m happy he’s having such a great experience, but I still miss having him underfoot when I’m at home working. Enough about me though, how’s my boy doing?”
“Well he’s doing well as far as I can tell. He’s scheduled to have his blood work, ECG and echocardiogram tomorrow morning and the doctor will be in to go over those results before he is released for another year. His heart rate and blood pressure look good today and his heart sounds strong and his lungs clear.”
“Great, he’s been doing so well, but the closer we get to his annual check-up the more anxious I get. We’ve been good so far, but that doesn’t mean we will be every time. Thanks again for being so good with him.”
“Oh please, he’s a great kid. I should get on to my next patient, but Cody and I are on shift so just let us know if you need anything.”
I waved at Ava and continued doing my rounds, checking in on the different patients on the floor, making sure their vital signs were good and that they didn’t need anything.
When I made it back to the nurse’s station, Cody was sitting there waiting for me, giving me a look of expectancy. “Well, are you going to tell me what’s going on with you? You’re never this quiet.”
“I don’t even know how to say this Cody. I think I’m pregnant. I was late this morning because I was picking up pregnancy tests at the pharmacy. You know how it is around this place, there is no way in hell I’m taking a test at the lab, it will be all over the hospital before my shift is over.”
“Holy shit! Are you fucking with me right now? How in the world could you be pregnant? Are you seeing someone I don’t know about?”
I couldn’t even look Cody in the eye. I might talk a good game, but I wasn’t one of those girls who felt comfortable sleeping with a guy after seeing him for a month, let alone hours after meeting him. But, that’s exactly what I did, and I can’t even say I’m sorry I did it. “No, I’m not seeing anyone. You know Everly is dating Joker and they are hot and heavy. Before they hooked up officially, I met his best friend and we kind of hooked up.”
“Oh girl, look at you go. Okay, it’s time for you to take a break. Go take that test and….”
“Tests.”
“Pardon me?”
“Well, I’m kind of freaking out and I might have bought five tests.”
“Oh of course you did. Okay, you go take those tests and come back here as soon as you know the results and we will figure out your next step.”
I reached over and grabbed Cody into a hug, which was hard since I was barely over 5 feet tall and he was just over 6 feet, but he leaned down so that I could squeeze him tight. “Thank you.”
Chapter 3 – Beast
Pounding on my door startled me awake, making me fall off the couch, where I must have passed out. The TV was still on with some kind of infomercial playing. Looking at my watch, I noticed that it was still the middle of the n
ight so I had no idea who the hell would be at my door.
Getting up from the floor I grabbed my gun off the coffee table and walked up to the door with it by my side, finger on the trigger. Stepping up to the door I checked the peephole and discovered Joker standing out on my front porch. “Come on brother, I know you’re awake, I heard your huge ass falling onto the floor.”
“Alright, hold on. You’re lucky I didn’t just shoot you through the door without looking with how fucking early it is.” With that I whipped the door open to see my best friend just looking at me like I was the funniest thing he’d ever seen.
“Well, I’m awake now you might as well come in. Why the hell are you here in the middle of the night anyway? Everything okay with Everly?”
“Yeah, yeah, Red is great. I’m just checking on you. The boys said you left the clubhouse hours ago and you haven’t been answering your phone and that’s not like you. Everything okay?”