“You can’t blame yourself,” Sergio said.
“But I can make reparations. That’s all I want—I want to make things right.”
“I think we all do,” Sergio said.
“I’m in for going on rescue missions,” Carl said.
“We’re in.” Adele grinned.
“Me too,” Matthew added.
Carl looked toward Sergio, who had been silent. He chewed on his lip and suddenly began to pay extra attention to the road.
Carl cleared his throat. “Are you in? We have a majority, but it would be nice if we had your support.”
Sergio sighed. “Can’t this wait?”
“Would you want someone to wait if you were stranded on the street?” Crystal asked.
Sergio took a deep breath. “I guess not. I’ll agree to pick up strays, but can we just do our best to get back to the office as soon as possible? I keep getting weird feelings about it.”
“What kind of weird feelings?” Carl questioned.
“It’s nothing. I just want to get back.”
“Deal,” Carl said, smiling back at the others. “Let’s find a place to pull over for the rest of the dark hours. We can get a little sleep, then get back at it.”
“I’ll take first watch,” Matthew said, feeling excited about their mission.
“I can take watch, too,” Crystal offered. “I’m pretty well-rested. There wasn’t much else to do in that town.”
“Awesome,” Carl beamed. “I’m not sure if I’ll be able to sleep.”
“Well, I’m going to try,” Sergio said as he circled the parking lot of a grocery store, looking for some cover. “Especially because we have no idea how long we’re going to be out tomorrow.”
Matthew sat up a little straighter. “How about this—we try to get supplies and pick people up on the way back. But we promise to drop whatever we’re doing so we have enough time to get to the office before it gets dark again.”
The others nodded in agreement. Sergio gave a half smile.
“I like that plan,” he said. “But something always gets in the way.”
“That’s a given,” Carl said. “But I’m serious—I really want to get back to the others, too. I feel like we’ve been away for a long time.”
“Tell me about the others,” Crystal asked as they settled into the car and got as comfortable as they could with the lab equipment and weapons filling the extra space.
“Well,” Matthew said, suppressing a chuckle at the thought of their strange mix of people. “We have Ellie and Genevieve. They’re both scientists. We picked up some equipment for them so they can try to study the virus. Genevieve is French, so there’s a bit of a language barrier there.”
“Can anyone speak French?” Adele asked.
“Lucas can. He was picked up by Carl and Sergio. “He has a big crush on her. It’s very obvious.”
The girls giggled at this. Matthew looked up at the front seat. It appeared that the soldiers had fallen asleep.
“Then there’s Pip—she’s Carl’s younger sister. “She and Sergio have a thing going on. Then there’s Jennifer, Pip’s friend. I think Jennifer and Matthew are into each other, but they’re trying to hide it.”
“Dang, this group is kind of incestuous, isn’t it?” Crystal laughed.
Matthew chucked. “Yeah, it can get awkward sometimes. I usually just try to ignore it all. It’s none of my business as long as everyone can get along. Finally, there’s Sally. She’s a little strange, but she’s nice. Oh, and I guess I can’t forget about Marigold.”
“Who’s Marigold?” Adele asked sleepily.
“Sally’s baby. I’m not sure how old she is, but she’s a tiny, little thing. That may have been the strangest encounter we’ve had yet.”
“A baby?” Crystal laughed. “What could a baby possibly do?”
Matthew told her the story of how Sally and Marigold came to join them. She held her hand over her gaping mouth as he recounted her horrible back story and how the others nearly killed her.
“That’s good to know,” Crystal said. “Remind me not to look suspicious in front of the others.”
Matthew grinned. “That’s okay, I can vouch for the two of you. As long as you don’t hold onto suspicious objects and avoid telling us what they are, you’ll be fine.”
After Adele drifted off to sleep, Matthew quietly gave Crystal the rundown of the others. He talked about everyone’s personalities, shared a few opinions of them, and recounted a few encounters, like Pip’s binge drinking. By the time she started to feel sleepy, he had given a full description of everyone in the office.
“I feel like I’ve known everyone for a long time, yet I’ve only met three of the gang,” she yawned.
“I think you’ll fit right in,” Matthew said. “If I were you, I’d try to stay out of any family spats. If you think Sergio is dramatic, just wait until you meet Pip. Honestly, sometimes I forget that Pip and Carl are related. They’re polar opposites.”
Matthew looked over to find Crystal asleep, her head leaning on Adele’s shoulder. He bent down and opened her bag, hoping she wouldn’t mind that he was going through her things. Matthew pulled out a knitted blanket and draped it over the two girls.
Then, he returned back to his watch. With his nose nearly touching the window, he looked for any threats. He could hear rumblings in the distance but had yet to see any creatures lurking in the dark. However, he knew that it was only a matter of time until they reached the territory where the rich sent the zombies. Matthew just hoped that Mayor Schilling wouldn’t go out of her way to see that the five of them died, allowing her secret to die with them. It wouldn’t be too hard to send a few extra zombies their way.
19
Matthew was getting used to long nights of poor-quality sleep. He felt disoriented, not exactly knowing when he was awake and when he was asleep. In fact, he wasn’t entirely sure if he stayed awake for his entire shift, nor was he confident that he really slept after Carl tapped him on the head and offered to take over.
But like he did anytime he went off duty, he squeezed his eyes shut and pretended to sleep. It made him uncomfortable when others stayed up on his watch, especially if he wanted time to himself. He also didn’t want to have to feel obligated to fill the silence with conversation. Sometimes, it was just too much to spend all of one’s time around people, especially wedged in a vehicle.
At one point, he woke up and looked to his left to find his wife sleeping on his shoulder. Matthew lurched forward, completely in shock.
“What are you doing here?” he wheezed.
“Just checking in on you. I’m worried about you.”
He stroked her brown, wavy hair. In the back of his mind, Matthew was aware he was in a dream, but he tried to silence that sliver of consciousness. He didn’t want to wake up yet. “I’m fine. What about you?”
She laughed. “You’re being silly. You know that I’m gone. Anyway, you don’t need to worry about me. I just want to know how you’re doing.”
Matthew pressed his nose into her hair. It smelled familiar, the same clean, fruity scent it always was. He didn’t like the idea of her not having wants and needs. In fact, she spoke as though there was no otherworldly existence for her. He had questions about the afterlife, but it didn’t seem like the right time to ask. He just wanted to hear her talk and be in her presence.
“To be honest, it’s not always great,” he said morosely. “I have some good people around me and I’m keeping busy, but I still feel incredibly lonely.”
“I’m sorry,” Rebecca said, stroking the side of Matthew’s face with her finger. “I wish I could be there for you.”
“Don’t say that,” Matthew breathed, his eyes filling with tears. “I should have saved you.”
He turned his head and looked toward his shoes. He hated crying in front of her.
She smiled. “There was nothing you could do. It came out of nowhere. It’s no one’s fault. People die—that’s just the way things wor
k.”
“It’s someone’s fault,” he replied. “Someone caused the disease to spread.”
“And what are you going to do about that?”
Matthew blinked. “I don’t know. I guess I should kick their ass, shouldn’t I?”
Rebecca laughed. “Don’t get yourself hurt in your quest for revenge. I won’t lie, it’s kind of hot when you’re vengeful.”
He playfully rolled his eyes at his wife. “I don’t even know how to make things right. I’m not sure if it’s possible.”
“Well, if it’s meant to be, you’ll find a way. If it’s not, then I guess you’ll come join me.”
“Really?” he asked, his eyes widening with excitement. This was the confirmation he had been looking for when he stared at the concrete from the top of the high rise.
“No!” she said, raising her voice. “I didn’t think I’d have to convince you to stay alive, Matthew.”
He shrugged. “Times had been hard. It’s an enticing offer.”
“It’s not an offer, merely a joke. Have you lost your sense of humor since I left?”
He nodded. “Probably.”
Rebecca sighed. Her face looked tired, yet it was just as youthful as the day they started dating. She wore the same navy-blue dress she wore in their engagement pictures—the pictures that covered the church basement at the funeral luncheon. Her hair was styled in the same way. Soft curls cascaded down her shoulders.
Matthew remembered the day they took those pictures well. He dreaded being in front of a camera, but Rebecca somehow found a way to make it fun. She was good at doing that.
“Just stay alive, okay? You’re worth a lot more alive than you are dead. I’m not even asking you to take out the boss, but see if you can’t save someone like me.”
“That’s the plan.”
“Good.”
She smiled at him, as if there wasn’t a worry in the world. For a minute, he believed it.
“I miss you, Rebecca. This isn’t fair.”
“I’m right here,” she said, looking a little confused. “I know you talk to me sometimes. Do you hear me when I talk back?”
He nodded. “Sometimes, but I think it’s just what I’d imagine you’d say.”
“What’s the difference?” she asked. “If anyone in this world has a handle on what I’d say in any given situation, it’s you. I bet you don’t regret me talking your ear off for all those years.”
He grinned. “Absolutely not.”
She ran a hand through Matthew’s dark hair, something she used to do to calm him down when he was feeling anxious. He closed his eyes for a split second to enjoy the sensation, afraid that if he stopped looking at her, she’d disappear. He knew she wasn’t real, yet he could still feel her touch.
“You know I want you to move on, right? I’m flattered that you’re so torn up about me, but I don’t want to see you like this. Hell, at some point, you all will have to repopulate this planet. Don’t let me stop you.”
“Jeez, Rebecca!” Matthew exclaimed, feeling embarrassed. The last conversation he wanted to have with his wife was the prospect of finding a new partner. In fact, the thought alone felt as though he was already cheating on her. He pushed the thought clear out of his mind.
“Calm down.” She giggled. “If I would have made it to thirty, we would have had this conversation eventually. There will be some nice women left by the time you fight this thing. Choose the one who will treat you the best. You’re a handsome man. Someone will snatch you up in a heartbeat.”
“Like who?” he moaned. He thought he was the luckiest man in the world to get with Rebecca. He didn’t think he’d ever find such fortune again.
“I don’t know,” Rebecca whispered. “I hear this one is into you. Do you have a thing for redheads?”
Matthew lurched forward, jarring himself from his dream. He slammed his eyes back shut, but Rebecca was dissolving from his field of vision. He willed himself to fall back asleep, to find her again so they could talk just a little longer. But it didn’t work. Matthew was awake and his wife was gone.
With the corners of his sleeves, Matthew quickly wiped at his eyes, feeling moisture trailing to his cheeks. It was rare to have such a vivid dream of Rebecca, especially one in which she wasn’t being killed. It had felt different than the other times his imagination painted a picture of her. Something about it was so real, as if he had briefly made contact with her. Was this possible?
Just like in real life, he chose to ignore some of his wife’s suggestions. Though in sleep he had his wife’s permission to move on, he made the active choice not to. She was the fire that fueled his every movement. He needed to focus on her.
He looked over at the seat next to him, feeling embarrassed to be sitting so close to Crystal. But he found that the entire backseat was empty. The women were missing.
“Where are the girls?” he spluttered, looking around the vehicle.
“They went out for a minute,” Carl said, frowning.
“Are you okay? You look a little sweaty,” Sergio asked.
“Fine,” Matthew muttered. “Why did they leave? Is it safe?”
“I haven’t seen much activity in the area,” Carl answered. “They went to steal a car. They took a gun with them, so they have some protection.”
“I think that’s them,” Sergio said, pointing to a minivan heading toward the Jeep. Sure enough, the girls waved enthusiastically from the front seats. They turned off the car and made their way back into the Jeep, sliding into the back seat next to Matthew.
“She got it on the first try,” Crystal said, smiling ear to ear. “It’s pretty exhilarating to steal a car. It’s got a full tank of gas, too. We can fit six people comfortably or we can jam a whole bunch of people in there. That, and we have plenty of room for supplies.”
“What did you figure out about the grocery store?” Carl asked.
“We only peeked through the window, but we weren’t immediately attacked by zombies,” Adele responded. “I guess that’s a good sign.”
“Shall we?” Sergio asked.
“Shall we what?” Matthew questioned.
“Grab some stuff from the store. Then, we can get the heck out of here,” Sergio said, looking antsy.
The five got out of the Jeep and walked into the store. Sergio and Carl led the way, followed by the girls. Matthew took up the rear, constantly checking over his shoulder.
The neighborhood they were in was fairly average in just about every way. It was not one of poverty, but definitely not the caliber of the community they had fled hours before. It was quiet, but Matthew swore he heard the sound of property being destroyed as he tried to keep watch of the dark streets. So, it came as no surprise when Matthew saw a figure move from the corner of his eye.
“Watch out,” he hissed at the others before springing into action. He withdrew the knife from his waist and charged the creature, stabbing it square in the throat. It recoiled, giving Matthew the opportunity to hack at it again. Finally, it fell to the floor, twitched a few times, then went stiff.
Adele and Crystal crinkled their nose at the sight of the zombie but didn’t seem too affected by the death. That was a good sign—they didn’t need any more pacifists on their squad.
“I’m not used to the smell yet,” Adele said, covering the lower portion of her face with her shirt.
Sergio laughed. “I don’t even smell anything anymore. You two are in for a treat.”
Splitting into smaller groups, Carl and Sergio took the front half of the store, while the remaining three searched the back, each with a shopping cart in tow. Matthew did his best to keep up with the women as they glided down each aisle, somehow able to see items and make decisions in a split second. They piled canned goods and toiletries into the cart before Matthew could even think about what they needed.
“Do we need shower gel and shampoo?” Adele asked, picking up a bottle.
“Well, we don’t have a shower, let alone reliable running water,” he s
aid.
Her face fell. “Right. I don’t know what I was thinking.” She grabbed handfuls of wet wipes and tossed them into the cart.
“I’m sure the other women will be glad that you know what they want,” Matthew said.
“It’s not too hard,” Adele chuckled. “In my experience, women don’t like to be completely filthy. In fact, most men I know would prefer not to smell like a zombie, too.”
Matthew subtly leaned forward to catch a sniff of himself. As far as he knew, he still smelled like the fragrant soaps from the bath.
When the cart was full, little thanks to Matthew, the group met up with the other two at the front of the store. Carl was chewing on a piece of beef jerky, shoving a handful into his mouth before placing his find back in the full cart.
“Let’s load up,” Carl said.
“That includes your insides,” Sergio added. “Otherwise, we’re not going to be able to bring everything back.”
With a little rearranging, the five managed to fill the Jeep with groceries, leaving just enough room for the passengers. Each with a snack from the store, they sat in the warm Jeep and discussed strategy through full mouths.
“Above all,” Sergio said, “we need to watch out for ourselves first. I’m not saying that we can’t save lives,” he said in response to Crystal’s glare, “but we can’t get so greedy with our rescues that we get killed.”
“I think that’s reasonable,” Carl agreed, nodding at the others. “How do we want to split up?”
“Adele and I will take the van,” Crystal said. “We’ll just follow you guys.”
“From your description of the office building, I have a decent idea of where it is,” Adele said. “If we get separated, we’ll just find you there.”
“Are you sure?” Matthew asked. “One of us can go with you.”
Last Man Standing (Book 2): Zombie Annihilation Page 15