Wade nodded. “I know. I’m not leaving again. It’s too much with just you, not since we officially became med bay central for this war. I’m thinking of asking Ari to reconsider being with the resistance and coming back here full time. Or bringing Lewis back from the outpost. What do you think?”
The truth was there just weren’t enough doctors in the universe. “Everything they’re doing matters where they are.”
“I know. So it’s you and me, Amber.” He looked over his shoulder to where Brenden glared at him. The Z did not like when people used my first name. I had a life filled with dichotomy. As the wife of the Chens, everyone associated with the Chen Empire spoke to me in polite tones. As Paloma’s baby sister, everyone from the Farm called me Amber. The former was bothered a lot more by the change than the latter.
I climbed into the machine. I hated this part. Still, I knew who I’d dream of. Amari, Hunter, and Shane. Oh, how I missed them. I’d once fled the galaxy to escape my life here. Now, I’d do anything just to have them with me.
I had to be brave. I wasn’t ever going to be the version of Mrs. Chen my abusive mother-in-law had wanted, but I could be the best one I could manage on my own. Everyone on this side of the galaxy struggled right now, everyone bled, and everyone worried. We’d all made sacrifices, and the best I could do to honor them was keep up a brave face. I didn’t do it because of some false idea of what a woman should be; I did it because it mattered to me to do so.
Wade closed the lid.
I woke up fast. The lid was open and an alarm blared. I tried to sit up. “How bad?”
The room tilted left and Wade put a hand on my shoulder. “It’s only two ships and I’ve got it under control. Stay down, I’m sorry the alarm blared as you were waking. Don’t get up too fast.”
I nodded. “I’m okay?”
“Treatment went great. Brenden is here to take you to your room to rest. Go with him.”
As if on cue, the Z Warrior appeared next to me. “I’m here, Dr. Chen. I’ll get you home safely.”
I knew he would.
We didn’t talk on the way outside as we made our way to the entrance to the underground compound that was now the home of the Chen Empire. My husbands had forethought and they’d designed things to manage this war. No one lived in the mansion now, it was a constant target, and the anti-bomb measures were failing. Soon, the home I’d hated but now missed like I’d lost a phantom limb, would be gone.
I stared up at the sky. “It’s beautiful tonight.”
He nodded. “It is. Did you spend a lot of time outside in your other home? On The Farm?”
The Z almost never asked me about that place, as if pretending I hadn’t vanished for two years would make it that way. The big scandal I’d pushed on everyone. “No, it wasn’t safe there either. I want safe.”
I was never that coherent when I first woke up. Poor Brenden had put up with this five times now.
“I want safe, too.” He nodded. “Do you know if Chrissy liked to be outside?”
Chrissy? It took me a second. “The nurse?”
She was a very smart, talented nurse who helped us a ton. She’d come from a farming community on the edge of the Dark Planets and escaped a wife broker who’d wanted to sell her to someone.
“That’s right.”
I stopped walking. “You like her. I knew it.”
Brenden’s eyes widened. “Dr. Chen, we need to get you inside.”
“You. Like. Chrissy.” He wasn’t getting out of this so easily. “And that’s good because she likes you, too.”
His mouth fell open. “She does?”
“Yes, of course she does. She asked me about you weeks ago. I told her it was complicated with the Z Warriors but I’d keep my ears open to see if you were thinking along those lines or still in self-deprivation mode.”
Brenden winced. “You said that?”
“No, of course not.” I grinned. “I told her I’d find a way to gently inquire if you were thinking about her. I haven’t had you alone to do so before now. There were all those crisis nights.”
He let out a breath. “Sometimes your sense of humor goes over my head. Yes, please tell her I like her. She wouldn’t be opposed sometime in the future when it’s safe to going on a date with me?”
“I’m sure she wouldn’t.” I patted his arm. “You could even take her outside.”
A ship zoomed overhead followed by another. Brenden was right. We should probably get inside. I let him lead me the rest of the way, stopping at the bottom of the stairs to stare at the waterfall in front of me.
Leave it to Hunter to put everything that needed to be kept safe in the same place. I’d heard that this had actually been hidden like this since the bombs, but had Hunter made it even safer. The Chens cared about the water and in front of me was the waterfall that survived when most of Earth didn’t. Clean, running water. Saving it, preserving it, had been the goal of the family forever and had made them rich beyond anyone’s wildest dreams. In front of me was why there was a Chen Empire at all.
“It’s beautiful,” Brenden spoke in a soft tone. “Strikes me every time I come in and out.”
“For me as well. I didn’t get it when I first lived here. What was the big deal about this water? I never came to see it. All those years, never.” I’d wasted a lot of time.
Brenden side-eyed me. “You were a little busy getting your ass kicked.”
I laughed, covering my mouth. “Yes, that’s true, and what you said shouldn’t be funny. But it is.”
He shook his head. “I never understand your sense of humor.”
“I’m not sure, but I think that up until recently I didn’t have one.”
In my room, Applesauce waited for me to snuggle in my bed. I’d wanted to ask Brenden a question for some time, and since I was loopy, I did. “How did it work out the fifteen of you ended up here, not going?”
He smiled at me. “We’re your guards, Amber.” His use of my first name wasn’t lost on me. He was trying this out because he’d heard Wade do it earlier would have been my guess, since they’d never listened to me when I told them to call me Amber in the past, to the point that I’d stopped requesting it.
“We go where you go. If you left, so would we. But if you’re here, we’re here. I’m in charge of your protection, as you know. I think Master Amari thought you would respond okay to me since I hadn’t been here when you were hurt.”
Why hadn’t I understood this before? “All fifteen of you? That’s a huge amount. My mother-in-law didn’t have fifteen guards.”
“It’s wartime and you’ve already been hurt. The Z will not let that happen again. Fifteen seemed the right number.”
I sighed, sitting on the bed. “Stuck with the weird, inappropriate Chen wife… I’m sorry.”
“Amber.” He made a face after he used my first name again. Informality didn’t taste good. “Dr. Chen.” He tilted his head in acknowledgement. “Every one of us volunteered. And we would again. Look around. This place would be gone without you. I think you might be keeping the entirety of the Chen Empire remaining here alive through the sheer force of your will alone. Add to that you are now a full-fledged doctor. We are proud to be your guards. I don’t know what the Mrs. Chens were supposed to be before. She was a wicked old lady when I was young. You redefined the role. Keep doing what you’re doing.”
With his words still banging around in my ears, I crawled into bed, missing the men who had made me first Mrs. and now Doctor Chen like a giant hole in my heart I’d never fill.
2 Sweetness with the Sour
A knock sounded and I woke up, groggy and disoriented. I hadn’t slept long enough. If something was very wrong, I was going to have to medicate myself awake to replace the med machine drugs still warping my system.
The knock again.
“Yes. Come.” I pulled the blanket to my chin.
Brenden rushed in. “Dr. Chen.”
“What’s wrong? How bad is it?” I got to my knees. �
�I need a minute to pull myself together. “
He shook his head fast “Nothing bad. I thought you should know right away. Sorry, it’s just that Master Shane is here.”
Here? That didn’t make any sense. “Is he hurt?” I scrambled up. “I’m coming. Tell Wade I’m going to dose and be right there.”
“Dose with what? No, I’m not hurt.” Shane walked into the room. He patted Brenden on the shoulder. “I got this.”
The Z Warrior nodded before he exited the room, closing the door behind him. My breath caught in my throat, and I thought I might have squealed for a second before I covered my mouth. I wasn’t reacting to Shane being back in what probably would have been deemed a formal, correct manner. I wasn’t sure what I was doing.
I drank in his dear face. He looked good, healthy but tired. There were dark circles under his eyes, but that was true for all of us these days. His hair had gotten a little longer, a little messy looking. It was adorable. His shoulders were still broad, the shine to his hair remained the same, he hadn’t… lost any limbs.
He moved because I couldn’t, taking me in his arms so gently I couldn’t help my cry.
“Hello there, gorgeous.” His strong arms were steady. Shane smelled right. I shook. “I think you missed me.”
I lifted my head. “I’m so glad to see your face.”
He wiped the tears trailing down my cheeks with his thumbs. “I’m so glad to see your face, too. What were you going to dose yourself with?”
“Oh, doesn’t matter.” I kissed him because I could. His lips were soft—they always were with Shane—and reveled in the feeling of the slight bite of his whiskers against my face. He kissed me back, picking me up so I could wrap my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. I kissed and kissed and kissed him. I couldn’t stop. Too many months without him, worrying he was dead whenever I let myself even think along those lines, and now the surprise of his sudden arrival undid me.
He laid me down on the bed as he finally pulled his mouth from mine. “Is this an okay time in the month for us to be doing this? I tried to keep track in my head of when your treatments should be. I thought about you every free second so that was one of the things I charted in my mind. But then we had a couple of weeks that blended into days because of the battles and I think I might have lost it. Just because I’m here doesn’t mean you have to be in pain.”
I kissed his nose. “I had a treatment about eight hours ago. I missed some, moved some. It’s not always convenient for me to have them done. Other people need help more than me.”
He scrunched up his face. “Then you should be sleeping. I wondered why Brenden took off like a bat out of hell to come down here. He must have wanted to give you a second to try to rouse. I thought you might be hurt and no one told me. I chased after him. None of it was well done.”
I sat up, so close to him that our heads almost banged. “I don’t want to sleep.”
“Okay.” He kissed me lightly on the lips and then smiled at me. “Amber, you can’t know how it feels to see you right now. Some nights I wondered if I’d dreamed that you were still alive.”
Our mouths fused together again. I pulled at his shirt, wanting to feel his skin beneath my fingers. He laughed as I got his shirt tangled over his head before I threw it aside. Applesauce ran into the corner to avoid being hit.
“Remind me I have to say hi to the cat when we’re done. He deserves a hello of his own.”
Shane was so sweet, all that kindness hidden beneath his serious exterior. I put my hand on his heart. It beat strongly beneath the pads of my fingers. I counted the beats. One. Two. Three. Four.
“Are you taking my pulse?” He nuzzled my neck. “Here’s a hint. Right now it’s racing. After I make love to my wife, it will regulate again and then probably slow when I take you in my arms to sleep for the night.”
I pushed back to grin at him. “I’m a doctor now. Officially.”
“Really?” The smile that lit his face would forever be in my memory. “That is such great news. I missed it. Fuck. Congratulations.”
I wanted to hear all his stories, all the things happening to him, but I also wanted to make love to him, and he wanted me, too.
He pulled my nightgown over my head and dropped it at the foot of the bed. I tugged at his belt and then his pants, finally leaving him in just his briefs. He was hard, pressing into the fabric, evidence of how much he desired this. I cupped him on the outside of his briefs, squeezing him while I did.
Shane sucked in his breath. “Oh, fuck.” He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “Amber. This is really happening. It’s not just in my mind. I never imagined it and had it feeling this good.”
I hadn’t even touched his skin yet. “Underwear, off. Please.”
He lifted his lids. “Not yet. This will go too fast if I take them off.”
Shane gently pushed me backward until I leaned against the headboard. Holding my eye contact the whole time he pressed my legs apart.
“Love? You don’t have to. It’s been so long,” I didn’t care if this was over fast. I wanted Shane. That was all that mattered.
“Amber, this is what I dreamed of. Well, all of it, but starting like this.”
His mouth came down on my inner thigh, he trailed down my leg, all the way to my knee before he changed sides and did it again. I sighed. This was heaven. I wanted his lips all over me. I couldn’t help it, I squeezed my own breasts.
Shane looked up as I squeezed my nipples. He moaned. “More of that. I am going to live off this for months.”
He squeezed the opposite leg as his mouth came down on my thigh again. The buildup was extreme. Shane hadn’t really touched me yet but that didn’t last long. While he still kissed me, he pressed a finger into my vagina before finding my clit and squeezing.
Mimicking the movement on my nipple, I cried out. The duel pinch made my hips come off the bed. He squirmed closer, grinding his own hips into the bed while he did this. Shane kissed me on the insides of my thighs, not pressing in yet. Simple, gentle kisses heated my blood even more.
He licked me, moving his head not his tongue as he kept his tongue flat and unmoving the whole time. I cried out. It was the gentlest touch and it hit every nerve in my body, turning them on. He did this over and over before he stopped to bite down on my clit. I was so turned on, so ready for him, that I exploded in pleasure before I even knew it was going to happen.
I had no warning, the jolts wracking through my body. I dug my hands down the back of his head, but he didn’t stop caressing my clit. Finally, I couldn’t take anymore. I dragged his mouth to mine. As he kissed me, he pushed my hand away from my breast, replacing it with his own. That was perfect, I held onto his back, digging my fingers into his skin. I was going to leave marks on Shane, his skin could carry my presence long after he’d gone back to war.
He pressed inside of me, my insides squeezing around him. It felt like welcoming him home. Nothing should feel this good.
“Shane.”
He pushed our foreheads together. “Stay with me. Right here. Like this moment never has to end.”
I loved that idea. He moved inside of me slowly, his hips gently rolling our bodies together. I lifted my own to meet his thrusts. With each joining, we both cried out. This was pleasure. This was… everything.
He kissed me the whole time, our sounds joining like our bodies did. I didn’t know how long we did this, but this was us loving each other. I could feel it in every ounce of my pores. Shane filled my every being.
“Amber.” Shane pulled back. He had to be close. I didn’t know how it was possible, but his whole body seemed to have hardened.
I kissed his chin, his cheek, his neck. Anywhere I could reach. “I’ve got you, love.”
“Come with me.” He kissed all over my face. “Need you with me.”
I was close. As he found his own pleasure, it brought my own. I held onto him, knowing that I’d never have a moment like this again. Shane had come home to me. I
was going to hold him every second I could.
I listened to his heart, smiling at what he’d said earlier about how his heart rate would regulate and then slow. We were in the calming stage.
I raised up on my elbow. “Tell me all your stories. How bad is it?”
He turned his head to look at me. “I don’t want my stories in here. There aren’t any good ones right now. It’s very bad, but it’s almost over. Couple more big wins and Evander is running from Earth. It’s going almost entirely the way Amari predicted.” He yawned. “We all just have to live through it.”
I laid my head back down. “Keep doing that.”
“I’m coming back home and then I’m never leaving again.” He kissed my temple. “So how long has it been since you’ve seen the other two?”
“What? Same as you, five months.”
Shane shook his head. “Really? I would have thought for sure one of them would have swung through here. They’ve not been back? I thought it was just me.”
“Hard to communicate out there? Not only here?”
“We can’t get through here. Hunter is working on it. So I didn’t know that the defenses are down and you all had to move underground. But we’re careful what we share up there. I wouldn’t want anyone to know I was coming here because it might put you at risk. They’re not sharing that info either.”
That made sense. “How long?”
His face fell. “Only until tomorrow. We’re grabbing supplies and going back out.”
“Thank you for coming here, Shane. I didn’t know how much I needed to see you. I’m trying really hard to be strong like you guys.”
He kissed the end of my nose. “Some days I’m not so strong. You’re amazing. Just be you. All will once again be well. I know it.”
I yawned. “Sorry.”
“Sorry? You were supposed to be asleep this whole time. Go to sleep. I’m staying with you.”
I snuggled against him. There were few things in life that I loved more than cuddling in bed. I let his heat wrap around me.
Rising Tides Page 2