When I get to the line that says, fall on your knees and hear the angel voices, my voice cracks. I’m overrun with emotion, flooded with love sent straight from God’s own heart. All of these angels, have grown to love me like family. I finish strong, proud of who I am and what I am destined for, replenished and renewed in hope.
Sam comes over and squeezes my waist and kisses my cheek. “That took my breath away. You sounded like an angel, nothing but pure sweetness to your voice.”
Then Sam leans into Elijah and says, “I told Brennen she has to marry me one day so she can sing to our babies with that sweet voice every night.”
I cringe when I hear his confession, to Elijah no less. Elijah brushes it off but I can see the ill intent hiding behind his eyes. “Yeah well, don’t talk about having babies with my little cousin here man, or I may have to break your neck.” He tries to sound like he’s joking and I think Sam buys it, but I know his threat was every bit real.
“Cheesecake?” I interrupt with hoping to ease the tension in the room. It’s worked in the past right?
Later that night after the tree is decorated, and the power is finally restored, we sit around the fire as if the lights weren’t working anyway. Will and Inara left the scene, but are still present in the red sky realm. They are on the back porch talking. I bet those two will be the next ones to get married. For the sake of the show, I invite Elena and Jesson to stay the night since the roads are probably flooded. I know this is Jesson’s last night on earth for a while and I want him to enjoy it with his new bride.
Sam yawns and stretches his arms above his head. It’s been a long day for him. Draining really, my subconscious teases. Stop, I almost lost him today. He gets up and kisses me goodnight on the cheek. “Sorry to call it a night so early, but I’m exhausted. I don’t know why, all I did was watch football and eat all day.”
“Food coma, Brennen doles them out like candy around the holidays. Jesson chimes in with.”
“No worries, we were just heading to bed ourselves.” Elena says suggestively to her husband. I shoot her a darting look. Sam looks too tired to even get the drift.
A few minutes later and it’s just me and Elijah, alone again. Well alone as I can get in this lifetime. He helps me gather the dishes and put everything away quietly.
I ease on to the barstool and Elijah pushes a cup of tea over to me from across the island.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” He dunks a teabag in his own cup, draining it with a spoon the way a proper tea drinker would.
“Did you still want to talk to me about something?” I ask and watch his eye get drawn to the corner as if he were trying to remember just what I’m referring to.
“I’ve said my piece, and as the cliché says, the ball’s in your court.”
“Jesson says that my body is trying to warn me away from you. He seems to think that once you’ve earned your grace back, that I will feel differently.”
“And how do you feel, do you feel threatened by me at all right now?”
“As we sip tea? No I don’t feel threatened, but somehow I think he’s right. He always seems to be right.”
“And what if he is?” Elijah banters with.
“What if he’s not?”
“Then I’ll go if you want me to go.” He walks around to my stool and sits beside me.
“If I want you to go? So if I asked you to stay, and I stayed with Sam, and even ended up marrying him, you would have no problem with that?”
“Why would you ask me to stay and then marry Sam?”
“I don’t know. This is all hypothetical.” I say rolling my eyes. Elijah rushes up and crashes over my lips like the angry waves after the storm still churning outside. He dives in with everything he’s got and I’m left floating in a pool of his love.
“How’s that for hypothetical," he says softly while nuzzling my nose with his. I can not deny that I love him, as much as I don't want it to be true. The warning bells going off in my head try and convince me otherwise. I place an unsteady hand on his chest to hold him at bay. My other hand twitches, itching to run my nails through his short soft hair. He reads me like a book, he's memorized every inflection of my brow, mapped every course of my lips from smiles to frowns and each emotion in between.
He takes my hand off of his chest and interlaces our fingers. "Goodnight love, sleep well."
"Goodnight." I pad softly up the stairs and peek in on Sam. He's tangled in his sheets, he looks troubled like he's having a bad dream. Maybe his subconsious knows exactly where his girlfriend's lips were just a moment ago. Perhaps he's reliving the glass acupuncture treatment he received earlier. Will sits in the window seat, keeping a close eye on Sam. He gives me a little smile and I ease the door closed.
The next day, Elena and I go to the mall in Newport to do some shopping. It feels nice to just be in the company of one Keeper for a change. I decided to buy Sam a new coat that would fend off the harsh winter climate of Massechusets.
"I think a cool classic leather jacket would fit his style. What do you think?"
"Well, it'd be a step up from the canvas steer wrangler he usually wears for sure. You need to do something about the boy and his boots though, he's going to come off as a hillbilly at Yale," she teases.
"I'm not worried about Sam's image. Everyone who meets him, adores him instantly."
Elena and I have spent way too much money and have made one trip to the car already to unload our haul. Not an easy thing to do so close to Christmas, the mall is jammed with shoppers.
"Are you going to miss Jesson?"
"Of course I'm going to miss him."
"How does it work, marrying a Keeper? I mean when do you get to see each other?"
"That's why time is different there, we can steal away for an hour or two here and spend days there. Just not when we are on a mission. You are a special case, you know, we don't usually guard a person day and night. A typical mission is short lived. We adjust the steering wheel on their car, catch them when they miss the first step, pull them back before they cross the intersection, that sort of thing."
"Okay but, isn't your first priority worshipping your maker? How does that fit in?"
"The Serephim angels, like your mother, were made to do nothing but praise and worship him constantly, we were made to fight and protect the kingdom and its people. So we are free to love Him as well as our spouses."
She browses a rack of dresses leaving me to my thoughts. I'm sure she knew why I was asking. I can't believe I'm taking relationship advice from Elena of all people.
Chapter 22 ~ Birthday Bash
Sam holds me in his arms as fireworks boom overhead, lighting up the sky over the ocean in bursts of color. Flashes of being torn apart by the talons of the black winged creature fill my eyes in horrible blood covered scenes.
I shake the images from my head, no this is how last year’s party should have went. Sam dips me down and kisses me. “Happy Birthday Brennen.” He says my name like a benediction. The moon forms a halo around his head. In my eyes, he is the most angelic man I’ve ever known.
“Come for a walk with me I have a surprise for you.” He says with a sparkle in his eyes. I follow him down the beach to a small tent. A little lantern inside gives off a warm glow and invites us in.
“You did all this? It’s so romantic.”
“Come hear.” He pops the top to the champagne bottle and zips the flap to the tent. I’m glad to finally be out of the prying eyes of all of the Keepers. He removes two flutes from a basket and pours us each a glass.
Outside the fireworks continue their cadence, but the sounds seem far off and Sam’s heart speeds up in his chest replacing the raucous noise altogether. He set’s my glass aside and I lie back as he covers me with his body.
He removes his belt as his gaze washes gently over me. I like where this is going.
He lifts my hands high above my head and wraps the leather around my wrist securing them. My brows dip low wonderin
g what’s going on. A smile plays on his lips, he almost looks as if he’s asking permission to do so, but then I see it. The subtle change in his eye flashes in a split second. A look that I’ve never been able to forget. The panic that ensues in my brain widens my eyes instantaneously.
He covers my mouth with his hand. He knows that I know. I scream out and but his hand is so secure no sound escapes. He yells out, “Yes!” as he stuffs a gag in my mouth muffling any hope of the Keepers hearing me. Oh God, he’s possessed again.
I struggle under his weight and he slaps me hard across the face. Pain lights up my head. I try and pull my hands free but they won’t budge. I fight with every bit of strength I have in me as he rips through the fabric of my dress. My heart is beating so hard and fast right now I know it’s about to give up all together. Tears flood down my cheeks and into my ears.
This is why they moved him so far away, to save me from this moment. I keep fighting, I’ll never stop fighting. Sam punches me in the lowest part of my abdomen with all of his strength and then again. The Keepers never come, perhaps to them it sounds like we’re having a good time in here. The pain consumes me. I’m under Malphas’ boot all over again. It probably is him inside of Sam, tired of letting his demons have all the fun. He promised it was his arms I’d die in. I fight to stay but the darkness takes me just as Elena flashes in next to me, she’ll save me, my soul knows it. I can rest now.
*~*~*
“She’s waking up.” I hear Inara say with urgency in her voice.
“Oh thank God.” My eyes flutter open at the sound of Elijah’s voice. He caresses the side of my face sweetly. I glance around seeing all of their faces, Elena, Jesson, Will. We’re in the recovery ward of Amorous. I blink back tears. Elijah’s here, he’s back in God’s glorious grace.
“What happened?” I say my voice barely audible.
“You’re going to be okay. That’s all that matters.”
“I want to know,” I plead. Elijah’s eyes fill with sadness.
“She’ll learn the truth eventually,” Elena says as if she’s already bored with the short lived reunion.
“Where’s my mother?”
“She’s taking care of Sam once and for all.”
‘What does that mean?” I say suddenly fearing for his innocent life.
“Don’t worry love, he’ll be fine,” Elijah says quietly, sitting beside me on the bed. I try and gauge his emotions as his gaze carries over my features. The onlookers filter out leaving us alone. Elijah pulls me into his arms and hugs the breath out of me. “I’m so glad I got there in time.”
“Tell me what happened after I blacked out.” I ask once again. He kisses my fingers and holds my hand on the bed.
“I came in right after Elena we held Sam down and Malphas started spouting off non-sense. Once I knew that it was him I was determined to end him once and for all. We couldn’t get him out without killing Sam so I went in after him.
I possessed Sam and fought Malphas inside of him. Will restrained Sam so that he couldn’t hurt himself and Elena readied the lead box. Usually Malphas teleports in a fight, but if he left Sam he would be captured and if he stayed in, I would rip him apart and put him in the cell myself. So that is just what I did.
“He’s captured?”
“Yes.”
“Now here is where you get to decide what happens next.”
“What do you mean?”
“With Malphas captured you are probably safer by tenfold. However if we use him as leverage we may be able to get him to remove Sam’s mark permanently.”
“So his freedom in return for Sam’s? Sam wouldn’t be marked and he’d go to Heaven when he dies?”
“Yes, but with Malphas free, he would make it his personal mission in life to destroy yours.”
“Speaking of my life how am I? He didn’t…” My look of despair finishes my sentence.
“No, I don’t even think that was his intention. Do you feel alright?” he asks.
I sit up and stretch as if I had just slept for days. Knowing this place, I probably have.
“I feel fine.” They must have healed whatever damage he caused. I’m not even sore. “Can I see Sam now?”
“Of course, he’s being kept sedated until we return.”
I pause at the door and hug Elijah’s neck. “Thank you.” I kiss his cheek and notice that he holds his breath while I do.
“It’s what I do.”
“I’m glad you’re back on our side.”
“I never left.” He smiles out and gives me a wink. Somehow I don’t think he’ll ever leave.
Journal of E.M January 1st 2014
I can’t bring myself to tell her the full extent of her injuries. I can’t tell her the words Malphas spat out before I ripped his jaw clean off with my bare hands. She’ll eventually find out that she’s unable to have children. The very hands that will one day caress her as only a husband’s can, are the very same ones that took that from her, took that from us, if what I saw in the Oracle is true.
Malphas wanted me to use her to bear the first Nephilim since the days of the great flood that wiped them all out. An offspring of a fallen angel and a human would be drawn into the dark by its very nature. At first I refused, but he said if I didn’t agree to the mission he’d simply send someone else to do it.
Last night during our battle he seethed out, “If she wouldn’t bare his child, she would never hold a baby in her womb.” It drew me over the edge, I tore him apart just like he did to me, time and time again in Hell.
I know Brennen will choose to save Sam. Malphas will end up free, but now that I’m back on her guard he won’t stand a chance of getting anywhere near her. Of that point we will be crystal clear. ~
We follow the long length of hall to the large hospital type room. Sam is resting in the same clothes he was in when I saw him last. A chill runs through me as images of him hurting me flood my mind.
Elijah notices but says nothing. “I know what you’re thinking. How can I see past the villain that tortured me last night and the time before? But all I see is the good in him. I have to do this for him Elijah.”
My mother has snuck up behind us at some point. She rubs her hands over my shoulders. “We will support you in whatever decision you choose.”
“Make the deal. Elijah will keep me safe.”
She burns a hole through him with her stare. Elijah bows his head humbly. She begins to walk off.
“Mother?” I call out sounding like a lost child. She turns back to me.
“Is there a way I can see Daddy again?”
She inhales a deep breath and puckers out her lower lip. “I’ll see what I can do.”
“Come love, we’ll get some dinner while your mother works her magic. I miss cooking for you.”
At his cottage Elijah pours me a glass of wine. I sip from the glass while perched on a bar stool overlooking his kitchen. “Is this the same stuff you had me downing at your party in the woods?”
He laughs out. “I had you downing it? You act as if I funneled into your stomach.”
“I thought my life was complicated back then, now look at us.”
“Yes we sure know how to make things complicated don’t we?”
“Is it still hard for you to see me with Sam?” He stirs something in a pan with his back toward me.
He finally turns to me and produces a genuine smile. “What’s easy, is seeing you happy. Sam treats you well. He loves you. I can be happy for you.”
“It’s hard for me. I mean morally, I struggle with my decision every day. I don’t think it’s gotten any easier to not give in to what I want.”
“And what’s that?” he asks in his velvety voice.
“You want me to say it? Fine, I want you. I long for the day that we can be together. When you’re gone, I feel like part of my soul is missing. I want you for nights like tonight, when we just talk like this for hours, and for nights that end in replications of our farewell kiss.”
“You were
designed to struggle with good and evil Brennen. I was designed to live free of sin, holy and pure of heart. Yet here I am coveting thy neighbor’s wife.”
“I’m nobody’s wife yet.”
“You stay loyal to Sam because of the guilt you feel when he figured out that you were in love with me. Yet, you still long to be with me and on the same hand you love Sam. The way I see it, you should simplify things and for once, I think your roommate surprisingly had some good advice. You should take it. You said it yourself you’re nobody’s wife.
You could date us both. We’ve never even been on a real date. You’ve never had the full experience of me trying to woo you.” He waggles his brows and flashes rows of perfect teeth.
“What would I say to Sam?”
“You could say “Sam,” he bats his long black lashes at me, “These are my college years. If we don’t get dating others, out of our system now, studies show that high school sweethearts are eighty-five percent doomed for failure.”
I joke back in my best attempt of a slow Texan drawl, “Well gosh, Brennen, what choice do I have, should I start by banging your roommate? I want us to have at least a shot of happily ever after.” Elijah laughs and goes back to the stove to stir something and returns to fill my glass.
“But seriously, think about it. Let’s say you keep this up.” He stirs the air between us with his wooden spoon. “Fighting your feelings for me. Then you finally marry Sam and you never gave us any kind of chance. If I know you, and I think I know you very well. You’ll regret it later.”
“And if Sam can’t handle me being with anyone but him and I lose him for good, I’ll regret it.”
“I’ve said my piece, it’s your choice.” He throws his hands up in a bemused surrender. He really has no clue that I’ve already had this whole conversation with Sam and I’m free to date Elijah all that I want.
He sets our plates down on the bar and it reminds me of our nightly routine.
“Chicken marsala, my favorite.”
My Soul to Save (Soul Keeper) Page 22