by Bianca D'Arc
Caleb surprised her, his eyes bright with a wetness she didn’t expect. But it wasn’t sadness, it was pride and acceptance. It was happiness that she was willing to do as they needed, to compromise her expectations of what her life would be to accommodate what must be done. To love them enough to save them all.
Caleb came around the corner of the table to kneel at her side. “You’re amazing, Jane.” He kissed her, hiding his tears against her skin. When he had better control of his emotions, he eased away, cupping her cheek in one big palm. “You give us everything, honey. You are our salvation.”
She grew concerned, noting the dark circles under his eyes. “Were you up all night again, writing down your visions?”
He nodded and stood, pulling her head to his chest, caressing her hair as he hugged her tight.
“They’re getting worse.” His voice was bleak. “I don’t understand half of the things I’m seeing, and it’s as if because I’m not getting it, they’re repeating and repeating, each time only slightly differentslightly more detailed. It’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced before.”
“You’re writing down the details?” Mick asked, stepping up to the table, concern clear in his expression. He took a good look at the weariness etched into his brother’s face.
Caleb nodded. “As much detail as I can capture. Then the vision repeats and I get more to write down. It’s as if they’re coming in small doses so I have time to write down what I don’t understand.”
“Like your subconscious is only giving you as much as you can handle at one time?” Mick reached for his brother’s wrist and timed his pulse.
Caleb leaned against the counter, letting his brother do the family doctor thing. “I guess you could say that. I hadn’t thought of it that way, but it makes sense.”
Mick looked up at him. “The human mind is an amazing thing. I wouldn’t be surprised if that isn’t exactly what’s happening.”
“Wow.” Jane watched them from the table. “Is he okay, Mick? Is there anything you can do to help him sleep more?”
Mick released his brother’s wrist, shaking his head. “We know from past experience the visions have just got to play out. I can give you some vitamin supplements though, to help keep you healthy while this runs its course, and Justin and I will take over your work on the ranch for the time being.” Mick didn’t even glance over at Justin, knowing without having to ask that he would agree. “I think you should spend whatever time you can asleep. Stay in your room, let the visions just come, and sleep when you can.”
“I can help you write things down,” Jane volunteered. “And I’ll stay with you today, while you try to sleep.”
Mick nodded. “Good idea. You take care of him, Jane. Justin and I will take care of the ranch. The sooner he gets through this cycle of visions, the sooner he can rest. We should do everything in our power to help that happen.”
Caleb was too tired to protest as Mick ordered him around, but he saw the sense of his plan and went along with it. Jane took Mick’s orders to the next level though, making chicken soup and tucking Caleb into their big bed after she was sure he’d eaten it. He slept for at least an hour before the vision came again, and when he woke in a cold sweat, Jane was there with a warm blanket and even warmer embrace.
“I found the notes you were making and read through a bit while you slept.” She held him close, her body comforting him like nothing else. “I hope that’s okay.”
Caleb stroked her hair as her head rested against his chest. “I’m amazed you could decipher my writing.”
She chuckled and leaned back. “I’ll admit it was a challenge, but I managed. Now why don’t you tell me what to add to your notes while you rest? When I’ve written it all down, you can try to sleep again.”
Caleb leaned back against the pillows she propped under him, snagging the nape of her neck in one broad palm before she could leave his side. He pulled her down for a lingering kiss.
“I missed waking up with you in my arms this morning, honey, but I was comforted by the game of thinking what Justin was doing to you that made you scream so beautifully.” His eyes glinted as he watched the humor, excitement and hunger blossom in her gaze. “Maybe we should do some remodeling. Do you think we could build a bed big enough for the three of us?”
“Four of us, Caleb,” she said daringly. “And I don’t know if Mick would go for it, but I’m pretty sure Justin would.”
“I know I would.” He kissed her again, with rising passion. “I’ve never shared a woman in my life, but just the thought of sharing you with them gets me hot like I’ve never been before.”
Jane tucked her head against his chest. “Justin told me he’s done it before.”
“I’ll be damned.” Caleb chuckled. “I just knew that boy was kinky.” He pulled back so he could look into her eyes. “It doesn’t scare you, does it? You know I’ll never let him do anything you don’t like.”
She nodded. “More than that, I know he would never hurt me, Caleb. I feel it from his heart. Just like I feel it from yours. I know I can trust you both, and Mick too, though he’s harder to read lately. I’m more than comfortable with you O’Haras directing my sex life.”
“Dear God, when did we get so lucky as to deserve you?” Caleb kissed her again because he had to.
She made him focus briefly to write down the vision and then coaxed him back to resting, but he wouldn’t let her leave. He pulled her into the bed with him, wrapping her up tight in his arms as he drifted to sleep again, only to awaken about an hour and a half later from another vision of a possible future.
Soothing him again, she helped him write down the confusing things he saw and they repeated the cycle of sleeping for a short time, waking, writing down what he’d seen, then trying to sleep again. Jane slept too, since she’d spent most of the night before experiencing Justin’s way of pleasure. When she couldn’t sleep any longer, she rested in Caleb’s arms, thinking about the future and the fact that she might already be pregnant with Justin’s child. The idea made her feel warm and fuzzy, and brought a profound love into her heart for Caleb, who was so genuinely happy at the thought of her having a babyeven if it wasn’t his.
The baby would be his though, she knew in her heart. He would love it as his own, and protect it the way he protected all of them, with his visions, his sacrifice, and his deep and abiding love. She couldn’t wait to put the baby into his big hands for the first time, watching as he learned how to deal with the tiny bundle, learning with him and his brothers, how to care for the child of their hearts. Mick would watch over the baby, doctoring its boo-boos, gauging its progress, and making it laugh. Justin would teach it things, dare his child to push its limits, nurture it with his special brand of love and discipline it when needed. She knew Justin would be the real disciplinarian of the three brothers. Just as she knew her baby would have Caleb twisted around its little finger from the moment of its birth. Caleb would be its beloved daddy.
And it would be that way for all of her children with the brothers, no matter who was the biological father. She hugged the idea of having each of their babies to her heart, knowing it was the one enduring gift she could give each one of them in this world gone crazy. It was the tiny taste of immortality every one of them wanted, the chance to sire the next generation of humanity, and pass on what they were and what they’d learned. Each of them would have that chance, she vowed, knowing Caleb had seen the truth of her thoughts in his visions of the future. It was a comforting thought.
Just before dinnertime Mick looked in on Caleb, finding Jane awake and looking at him from within Caleb’s tight embrace. Mick watched them for a long moment, his emotions held tightly in check, as usual these days.
“How was he today?” Mick whispered, not wanting to disturb Caleb’s sleep.
“He keeps waking up. The longest stretch of sleep was almost an hour and a half. I guess he’s had about four hours total.”
“Not great, but enough to keep him going for a bit.”
Mick crouched at the side of the bed, facing her. “You look good there, in his arms.”
He could see she was surprised by his words, but he needed to say them. He’d thought of nothing else since he’d come in her mouthtwicethe day before. He still could hardly believe it. His conscience was hounding him, his sense of what was right and what was wrong turned upside down by the incredible feelings she’d unleashed within him.
“I can’t betray his trust again, Jane. No matter how much you say it’s right, I can’t get past the idea that it’s really terribly wrong.”
“Don’t say that, Mick.”
He was about to turn away from the pain he saw in her eyes when Caleb stirred, rising from behind Jane to pin Mick with a stern gaze.
“Damn, Caleb. How long have you been awake?”
“Since you started flapping your gums. Mick, you are the most pigheaded little shit!”
“Don’t get mad at me because I don’t want to betray you.”
“You betray us all!”
Mick rocked back, surprised by the vehemence in his brother’s tone. Caleb was usually slow to burn and even slower to anger, but he was as close to rage as Mick had ever seen. Mick was more than surprised. He was shocked.
“Honey, show him what I mean. Show him the notes.” Caleb nudged Jane’s shoulder, releasing her from his tight embrace. He watched her with hunger and love as she crossed the room to the small desk where she’d been helping him with his notes. She gathered them up and handed the sheaves of paper to Mick silently.
“Read that,” Caleb ordered. “Then tell me what’ll happen if we don’t continue on this course we’ve set. Read that and tell me if you can see any other solution to the trials that are coming.”
Mick was shaking when he sat in the comfy chair by the window. He was curious and more than a little afraid of what he might read in the notes of his brother’s most recent visions. Caleb had never written them down before. This was a unique chance to understand a bit of what his brother saw.
Mick read in silence. There was a lot to get through and much of it was hard to understand, since it related to the aliens. Jane left quietly, saying something about fixing dinner, while Caleb took a fresh piece of paper and began recording whatever new visions he’d received. Mick was enthralled by what he read, and the interpretations Caleb had mused on in his notes, having many years experience with deciphering what his visions meant. But the interpretations here were wide open, many questions presented by the visions of the alien cities that were unanswerable by their limited human knowledge.
But those were questions for many years from now, if Caleb was reading them right. What was most important were the clearer visions of what would happen to them in the very near future…when the aliens came to the Waste.
“My God,” Mick whispered when he read the clearest, and most disturbing, of the images Caleb had recorded. “I never realized what a burden this is for you.”
Caleb looked solemnly at his brother. “More than you know,” he agreed. “But it’s mine to bear and I’ve learned how to deal with it for the most part.”
“Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
Caleb shrugged. “What could you have done, Mick? I know you’re a miracle worker with medicine, but there’s nothing anyone can do to relieve the pressure of my visions or what they portend. I just have to interpret them and deal with them as best I can.”
Mick stood and walked over to his big brother, the man he had looked up to all his life.
“I don’t know what to say, Caleb.”
Caleb threw the pad he’d been writing on aside and stood to face his brother. “Say you’ll love Jane and treat her well. Say that I can trust you with her happiness. Say you’ll accept the one gift she and I can give you in this crazy mess of a world we live in.”
Mick looked away, uncomfortable. “Jeez, Caleb. This doesn’t feel right.”
Caleb grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him hard. Just once.
“Did you read what I wrote in those pages? Did you read the part where if even one of us leaves, we all die? Do you understand that you won’t be able to survive here at the ranch without her? Without the love she can give you? Without the release she can bring you?”
Mick felt like he was going to fly apart. “I read it, dammit! But Caleb”
Caleb pulled him into a bear hug like he used to when Mick was a kid, crushing him close and slapping him on the back. His voice was gruff in Mick’s ear and he sounded near tears.
“There’s no other way, Mick. No other solution for any of us. Take what she offers and treat her well and she’ll save us all. Reject her and kill us allher included.” Caleb let him go, pushing away to grab the pad on the bed and throw it with the other papers Mick had read. “Tell me you can kill her, Mick, knowing what I’ve seen. Tell me you can kill me and Justin too, by refusing her.”
“I can’t,” Mick whispered, in pain. “I love her too.” He broke down then, sinking to the side of the bed, running his hands through his hair in despair. Caleb was calmer, placing his big hand on Mick’s shoulder and squeezing lightly.
“It’s really a no-brainer, Mick. We all share in her love, we live. If even one of us denies what we all feel, we’re all as good as dead. We have to present a solid front to the aliens when they come. If we act together, they’ll keep us together. If we stay separate, they’ll kill us off one by one.”
“I don’t want to hurt you, Caleb. She belongs to you.”
Caleb shook his head as he sat at his brother’s side. “She belonged to me legally, for a few years, true. But she’s always belonged to all of us, Mick, since she was a little girl. Now she’s a woman, and we have to treat her as such.” Caleb patted his brother’s back, offering comfort. “I don’t see it as a betrayal. I see it as a necessary step in the evolution of our lives. She’s as much mine now as she is yours or Justin’s.”
Chapter Eight
Jane felt the firestorm of emotion coming from the bedroom. More of it was from Caleb than from Mick, it was true, but Mick was so desperately upset, she could feel even his fierce control slipping, allowing the depth of his despair and sadness to sweep over her. She sank to her knees in the middle of the kitchen trying to withstand the storm.
Justin found her that way when he came in from the yard. He picked her up, holding her close as she shook with reaction, and she felt his worry too.
“What is it, Jane?”
She nodded toward the bedrooms. “Mick and Caleb.”
“Hell, I’ll kill them myself.” He tried to let her go, but she clung to him.
“Leave them for now,” she begged. “Mick has got to come to terms with this now. Caleb’s got to make him understand.”
“Understand what?”
“I read Caleb’s notes about his visions. Justin, it’s scary.” He ran his fingers over her hair, soothing her as her eyes filled with fear for the future. “If the four of us don’t face this together, we’re all going to die, one by one.”
“Ssh.” He soothed her, wrapping her tight in his strong arms. “We’ll face it togetherall four of us. Nothing can separate us.”
“Nothing but guilt,” she whispered, afraid to the depths of her soul this would be the stumbling block that would kill them all.
“Guilt?” She nodded at his questioning look. “For sharing your love? Sharing your beautiful body?” She nodded again, his warm eyes comforting her as he let her feel the conflict that still resided in his own soul. “It’s hard to take, Jane, but I’m willing to trust Caleb. If he says this is what we have to do, then I’ll do it. With pleasure.”
She could feel the teasing in his heart, the understanding that being her lover was anything but a chore, and the passion that swept through him whenever he thought of her body beneath his. But she felt the crescendo of emotions in the other room too, and it hurt to feel the turmoil and pain coming from two of the men she’d loved all her life.
“Read what Caleb wrote, Justin. You’ll understand the ne
cessity then.” She moved out of his arms and toward the bedroom. She couldn’t take any more of the pain coming from the other two men. Justin followed her, slowing her progress.
Justin captured her loosely from behind as they approached the open bedroom door. He sought out his brothers’ eyes before allowing Jane to go to them, and was relieved to find some semblance of calm had returned to them both. By the way Jane had been trembling when he’d come in, he’d expected to find blood on the walls or some other horrific scene. What he found instead, was two men sitting on the side of the bed, looks of frustration, sadness and stunned acceptance over an impossible situation clear on their faces. He let Jane go, watching Mick carefully as she knelt in the small space between the two men, placing her hands on both of them as if to hold them to her.
“Is everything okay in here?” Justin looked from one to the other as he entered the room.
“As okay as it’s going to get, I guess.” Mick sighed heavily. It was a frustrated sound.
“Good.” Justin nodded, his gaze stern. He had no sympathy for Mick just now. “Jane was trembling on the floor of the kitchen when I came in.”
“Justin!” she admonished him.
“You think I wasn’t going to tell them what their emotions did to you, baby? They’ve got to think first if they plan to fight around you.”
“Oh, Jane, I’m sorry.” Mick gripped her hand. She moved into his lap, cuddling into him as if to give him comfort. Mick looked thunderstruck at the warm woman on his lap and Justin saw Caleb smile.