“Why’s that?”
“No reason,” Elsie shrugs and looks away. There’s something she’s not telling me.
“Is having more fun the reason for the sexy photo shoot, or was that something else entirely?”
“That was my friend twisting my arm into doing something.”
“So, who are the photos for?”
Elsie shrugs and says, “Myself. Posterity. No one.”
“You can always give them to me, I’d appreciate them.”
“I’m sure you would.”
“Great, so when do I get them?”
“Hey,” she says and playfully hits me, “who said you were getting to see them?”
“Why not? After all, I was at the photo shoot and I definitely liked what I saw.”
“That was a fluke. Realistically no one except me is ever going to see those pictures.”
Chapter 10
Elsie
The cheese on the remaining pizzas congealed long ago. We’ve been sitting here for hours, talking about anything and everything. We haven’t spoken again about the media storm. At some point Xander changed chairs and is now sitting beside me. I shuffled my chair around to face him better and though we aren’t touching, our chairs are close and a charge regularly seems to jump between our bodies.
Xander got me to tell him all about working here, down to the nitty gritty details and then got me to tell him all about my boring, normal parents and my brother and about growing up in Trenton. My father is a bookkeeper and my mother is a kindergarten teacher. My brother is exactly two years older than me and became a high school math teacher. It’s all very bland but Xander seemed interested so I kept talking. Basically, I told him everything about me, except my never-ending medical tests because who wants to hear about that?
I glance at my watch, it’s after midnight. The air has a slight chill and I’m grateful for my blazer, but my legs are cold. Not that a bit of cold could make me want to leave this roof right now. I would quite happily sit here for another day, just talking to Xander. Everything between us is easy and natural. The realization of that gives me the courage to ask what I’ve been dying to know.
“So, are you ever going to tell me about this whole media thing?” I ask, my eyes probing his.
Xander takes a deep breath and exhales sharply. “I will tell you everything. I don’t know what it is about you but I’m going to take a risk and trust you.”
I can’t contain the smile that springs across my face at his words. It’s because I feel the same way about him, so the feeling is mutual. He is no longer Xander Whitman, world’s sexiest man, he’s simply a man. Albeit a damn sexy one.
“Well, I trusted you with my life story,” I say.
Xander shifts forward in his chair and our knees mesh together. He leans forward, cups the back of my head and brushes his lips over my cheek, unleashing a million butterflies in my chest. Placing his lips at my ear, in a low voice he says, “You’re not telling me everything. You’re holding back, I can tell.”
The truth of his words freezes me. I’m asking him to share everything, but I haven’t shared everything with him. I reason with myself that my issues don’t concern him and wouldn’t interest him whereas his scandal definitely has an impact on the next few hours of my life. Especially if he’s going to touch me like this.
As suddenly as he’d cupped my head, he straightens and sits back in his chair. I look at him, but he simply shrugs with a half smile.
“So, are you still going to tell me?” The words escape my lips before I can stop them.
He takes my hand in his and says, “Absolutely. This is what you need to know — the whole thing is bullshit. I’ve never been in a relationship with Luna. We are like brother and sister since our families are so close and we are both only children. I’ve known her since I was a baby. Well, we made up the relationship for the sake of Lunatics. I’ve never kissed her like this.”
He leans forward and strokes the back of his fingers down my cheek. I forget to breathe. I close my eyes and his lips are on mine, overwhelming me. Everything stops. My heart. The traffic below. I am focused on Xander, the only person alive. Our kiss deepens and our tongues twirl and entwine in a slow, leisurely way that reflects our evening. As he kisses me, my body remembers to breathe and my core flames with want.
Xander pulls away, his eyes bore into mine and he says, “See, Luna and I have never done that.”
I open and close my eyes slowly. “Not… not in any of your weird sex games?” I ask quietly.
“There weren’t any. Not with her, anyway.”
“So, is there any truth to the stories?” I can’t believe I’m saying these things right after he kissed me like that. Right now all I want is his lips back on mine.
He presses his forehead against mine and says, “I’m not going to pretend I’m some saint, but there is nothing to her stories, especially the pegging bullshit. In fact, I’m making her retract it.”
“But why is she saying these things?” My shoulders raise and my head shakes as I ask the question.
“Same reason we made up the relationship in the first place — her ratings.”
“So that’s all it is? Getting better ratings?”
Would you really create and live an entire fake life for the sake of TV ratings? Especially if you don’t need the money. It’s a strange conversation to have with our heads so close together but I have to know and understand, especially if I’m going to let him kiss me like that again.
All pretense of this being the good assistant manager entertaining a VIP guest went out the window long ago. This is all about me and him. I’d never had a one-night stand, even with my vow of having more fun, and I might be the most naïve person on the planet, but right now I swear there’s something more between us.
“That’s all it is, and tomorrow you will see Luna come out in the media and retract everything.”
“How can you be so sure she’s going to do that?”
“Because I threatened to leave the show if she doesn’t.”
My shoulders slump and I say, “Does that mean you’re still going to be her boyfriend?” Alarm bells ring in the back of my head. He’s still going to publicly be her boyfriend, or is he simply her boyfriend? My ex was a cheater, and cheaters are great liars.
“Only because she’s making me or else she won’t do the retraction and I’ll have the stupid pegging story out about me, along with all the other BS.”
“Why should I believe you?”
“Because, you are the only person I’ve ever confessed the truth about my relationship with Luna. I’m not kidding when I say no one else knows aside from our parents.”
“But why? Why tell me?”
“I don’t know, you make me want to be myself,” Xander’s voice drops and he looks away, his neck and jaw taut. Liars don’t act like that, they look you in the eye and challenge you not to believe them.
On reflex I rest my hand on his thigh and say, “This situation really seems to be bothering you.”
“Is it that obvious?”
“I’m glad you told me all of this. It’s always good to say things out loud and get them off your chest.”
Xander leans forward and crushes his lips against mine. There is no slowness like our earlier kiss, only raw passion. Hooking his arms under mine, he urges me up and we stand, our bodies pressed against each other. His arms are wrapped around my body, his erection impossible to ignore. The butterflies have turned to tingles and reach from my toes to the top of my head.
We kiss until it seems like we’ve sucked all the oxygen from the sky. I don’t think I’ve ever kissed anyone for so long, in fact I know I haven’t, but if we stopped right now it would be too soon. We carry on kissing, our bodies moving and pressing against each other’s in a sensual dance. My body wants more, I can’t help it. I lose control over myself around him.
Finally, he pulls his mouth from mine and says, “Did you feel that? That’s why I told you.”
“I knew it wasn’t just me,” Xander says and kisses me once more.
The intensity of the kiss increases and I am jelly in his arms. I also believe he’s telling the truth about Luna. There’s no doubt in my mind.
I break the kiss and whisper, “I’ve never had a one-night stand before,” And I don’t want to have one, but I really don’t want him to stop either.
“Who said this was a one-night stand?”
Chapter 11
Xander
I don’t know what made me say that. I guess there were a few reasons. For one, I’ve realized Elsie is far too sweet to use and discard the way I’d originally intended. My first view of her in lingerie obviously gave me the wrong idea about her but she’s far too special to be another notch on my bedpost.
In fact, she makes me want to throw my bedpost out and buy a new one, one that’s just for her.
“But you’re leaving tomorrow,” she says, her eyes searching mine.
“Changed my mind. Turns out this hotel is a great place to hide from the media. Plus it has the best assistant manager in the country.”
I sit back in the chair and pull Elsie onto my lap. She drapes her arm around my shoulders and I squeeze her tight against me.
“I’m glad you’re not leaving in the morning.”
“Me too. As long as this means dinner in the VIP area again tomorrow.”
“I’ll be working all day so I’m free in the evening. There’s here again, or we can always leave the hotel. There’s this great bar I know. Tarzan’s is always fun.”
“I’m hiding, remember? I’m not leaving the hotel. I don’t even want to go in the lobby in case someone recognizes me.”
“Oh right, I’m not used to this whole hiding-out-from-the media lifestyle,” she says, looking off into the air dramatically.
“It’s a tough life,” I say sarcastically.
“It must be tough playing a pretend boyfriend on reality TV. How do you live the rest of your life? I mean, if everyone in the world thinks you’re Luna’s boyfriend then how do you live your… normal life?” she asks thoughtfully.
I shrug and say, “I don’t.”
“But then that means your whole life is fake.”
“Pretty much,” I say.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned today it’s that I’m tired of my plastic life. The media stories already made me realize that I don’t want to keep living my life the way I have been, with all the fake this and pretend that just for the sake of the TV show. Not to mention all the posers my non-television life has been surrounded with, all for the sake of the people around me trying to get on Lunatics. Or at least just be able to tell their friends that they are my friend.
No one gives two damns about anything other than themselves and I’m ashamed to say I’ve been living my life that way.
“Don’t you get tired living like that?”
“I didn’t used to, but I am pretty fed up with it today.”
“Then I guess today is a good day to change it,” she says with such a genuine tone that it makes it all painfully obvious.
Elsie has been an epiphany. We sat here and talked for hours and not once has she worried about her hair or fixed her makeup or ask to be on Luna’s show or talked nonstop about the show or her latest purchase or what party she’s going to next or who she met or on and on and on about things that don’t fucking matter.
It’s no wonder I said this wasn’t a one-night stand because as far as I’m concerned it isn’t. Elsie is a breath of fresh air and I intend to bundle her into my arms and hold on tight.
The fact that she’s not a one-night stand or even a sex-on-the-first-night kind of girl just makes her more appealing to me and for once my dick can wait.
“Believe it or not, I am going to change my life.”
“Yeah, sometimes it takes something really bad to happen to make us see what we’re not doing right in life and change.”
“Change like take-sexy-pictures change?” I say with a coy smile.
Elsie presses her finger against my dimple and twists it around, her eyes gleaming in the moonlight. “I’ve wanted to do this all day.”
“I won’t tell you what I wanted to do all day.”
“I think I can guess. Anyway,” she says pulling away her hand, “what are we having for dinner tomorrow?”
Each other, I think but I say, “Chinese?”
My cock stiffens with the thought of burying my face between Elsie’s thighs and I immediately force myself to think about baseball. Coming up with an all-star team always clears my mind and right now my mind needs clearing or I’ll have to go back on my decision not to fuck Elsie tonight.
“Do you get to New York much?” I ask, steering the conversation to safer territory.
“Almost never. Usually I go in for some Christmas shopping but that’s about it.”
That’s going to have to change. “You should come in more often.”
“Is that an invitation?”
It is. I definitely want Elsie to visit me so I can introduce her to my bed, among other things. But something in my chest tells me to hold on, to slow down. This isn’t just hooking up with some random chick, this is me changing my entire life and entering into a relationship with a real, regular girl.
Maybe I need to think it over and figure out the best way forward. Sort out things with Luna first. Somehow extract myself from Lunatics. And extract myself from my entire life, at least if I want to get rid of the posers.
That means rebuilding my entire social circle with genuine people. Not that Luna isn’t genuine, she’s just genuinely fake.
Either way, it makes sense to take things slow with Elsie rather than change my entire life for the first regular girl I happen upon.
“I can show you around,” I say.
“What about Luna and the media?”
“The media will move on soon, especially after Luna comes clean about her lies.”
“And Luna herself? If she’s your TV girlfriend still is she gonna be okay with you running around with other women?”
I laugh and say, “Supermodel, do you think I haven’t been running around with girls while the shows been on?”
“I don’t really want to think about you and your manwhore ways.”
“Hey, who are you calling a manwhore?”
Elsie quirks a brow. I pull her into me and brush my lips over hers. It was a bad move. My cock stiffens in my pants and I struggle to stop myself from bending her over the table and fucking her senseless.
I go back to rebuilding my all-star baseball team.
“Do you like baseball?” I ask.
“Love it,” she exclaims.
“Yeah? Who would be on your all-star team?” I ask.
We spend ages discussing who we would want on our teams, and whether her team would beat mine. Our conversation rambles and we talk for ages, Elsie sitting on my lap the entire time.
Everything feels real.
Elsie yawns and looks at her watch. “Holy shit, it’s after two and I have an appointment first thing in the morning.”
“What kind of appointment?” I ask.
“Nothing important, I just can’t miss it.”
“Does that mean you’re leaving me?” I tease.
“Afraid so.”
I can’t resist asking, “Is there a tuck-in service?”
“Not tonight there isn’t.”
Elsie gets off my lap and I stand beside her. She leads me through the door into the hotel and I followed her down the flight of stairs that leads from the roof. We end up taking the stairs all the way to the ground floor and we go halfway down the stark white employees-only corridor.
She stops at the door and says, “My car is parked right outside this door, so I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“I’ll see you in a few hours, supermodel.” I mesh my fingers through her hair and press my lips against hers in a chaste kiss that quickly turns int
o a deeper one.
Chapter 12
Elsie
I put my hand on the reception door, ready to open it but pause, stand up straight and adjust the thong I put on on a whim this morning. That was before I realized what sort of morning I was going to have.
When I phoned the doctor back, my mind was preoccupied with Xander. They had a cancellation first thing this morning and I took it without really listening to what it was, other than the fact that it was yet more tests.
When I turned up at nine, I learned it was a lumbar puncture. Joy. I laid on my side in the fetal position as they poked and prodded my spine to get a spinal fluid sample. I don’t know what it will tell them, inflammation levels I guess.
Luckily, I was able to distract myself from the ordeal by thinking about Xander. His lips on mine, his arms around me, his impressive hardness digging into me.
Turns out even having my spine probed isn’t enough to take me down from last night’s high. I’m probably the only person who has ever had a lumbar puncture in a state of arousal.
It was far and away the best night of my life. And unlike the media’s claims about him being a sex maniac, Xander was a perfect gentleman.
If anything, I wish things had gone farther. Which is ridiculously out of character for me, even with my pledge of having more fun, but my body wanted one thing. In hindsight I’m glad things didn’t go further because I don’t want to have any regrets. Besides, it leaves something to look forward to.
Assuming we do still have dinner together tonight.
Which is why I put on a thong this morning, just in case. Although I probably should’ve waited until after work to put it on, given the way it keeps wrenching itself up my butt.
I push open the door and walk across the vacant lobby. Cynthia stands behind the desk, a scowl on her face, as she watches me through her narrowed eyes. I am really late.
“Elsie, nice of you to join us today,” Cynthia says as I reach the desk.
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