by Lisa Jordan
“Of course not. I love the little guy.” She turned and headed up the steps. “I’ll throw a bag together and meet you at your house.”
Caleb reached out and grabbed her wrist. With a gentle tug, he pulled her to him. He gathered her in his arms and kissed her.
“You are amazing.” He released her and headed for his car, savoring the sweetness of their kiss as he crawled behind the wheel and started the engine.
Chapter Twelve
The girls should’ve been in bed ages ago, but Zoe had a tough time enforcing it after the fun day they had playing dress up, hosting a tea party and polishing off bath time with polka-dotted pedicures.
She added the last purple dot to Ava’s tiny toe, and then blew across her foot. “Okay, sweetie, let those dry. You like?”
Ava looked at her toenails, then at Zoe and nodded with a small smile on her lips.
Zoe brushed her damp hair behind her ear, releasing the scent of her baby shampoo.
Ella crawled onto the couch with a book in her hand. “Zoe, will you read me a story?”
“Sure, sweetie.” Zoe situated Ava on her lap, then reached for the storybook Ella had chosen—No Matter What, a story about a little fox who questions if his mommy truly loves him.
Ella snuggled in next to her. Zoe wrapped her arms around both girls and opened the book.
She read using two different voices, eliciting giggles from both girls. She hadn’t read a children’s book since Griffin was a toddler, before her life fell apart.
She finished the story to find Ava fighting to keep her eyes open. Zoe brushed a kiss across her forehead. “Hey, little one, how about if we head to bed?”
Ella held the book open in her lap to the page of the little fox lying in bed next to his mother. She rubbed her finger across Mama Fox’s nose.
She looked up at Zoe with questioning eyes. “Zoe?”
Zoe brushed her hair off her forehead. “Yes, honey?”
“My mommy is far away. Does she still love us?”
“Oh, baby.” Zoe lifted Ella onto her lap and pressed her head against her chest. She didn’t want to lie to the child, but what could she say? “Ella, I’m sure your mommy loves you very much. Remember the story—love surrounds us wherever we are.”
“If she loved us, why did she leave us and make Daddy so sad?”
“I don’t know, sweetie. I do know your daddy loves you very much, and you make him so happy.” Ava’s gentle snores warmed Zoe’s neck. “You need to get into bed.”
Zoe stood and held out her hand. Ella looked at the cover of the book once more, then set it on the couch. She took Zoe’s hand, and they walked down the hall to the girls’ room. Zoe pulled back the covers and laid Ava on her bed. She pulled the covers up to her chin and kissed her petal-soft cheek.
Zoe turned to find Ella had climbed into bed already. She smoothed the covers over the child and caressed her cheek. “Thanks for the fun day, sweet girl.”
Ella reached for Zoe’s hand and pressed a kiss onto her palm. “I liked it.”
Smiling at her, Zoe brushed her fingers across the child’s cheek. “Good night, Ella.”
Ella reached for her hand. “I love you, Zoe.”
“I love you, too, Ella. Very much.” With tears pressing against the backs of her eyes, she headed for the door and flicked off the light. For a moment, though, she stood in the darkness with only the soft glow of the night-light casting shadows across the floor.
How could Valerie leave behind those two adorable little girls? Didn’t she realize what precious treasures she’d had?
While Ella was in school, Zoe had taken Ava to see the rescued puppies. She had seemed particularly taken with Shiloh—the one Zoe cuddled with yesterday.
She moved into the living room and gathered the nail polish bottles, the storybook and the girls’ art supplies they used to draw pictures for Sully.
A gentle quiet drifted over the room, but Zoe didn’t feel peace. She sighed and sat on the couch. Harper settled at her feet while Riley jumped into her lap.
She picked up a framed photo of Sully and the girls. She ran her fingers over their smiles. Ella may be questioning her mother’s love, but no one could accuse Sully of not loving his daughters. He didn’t just say it, he showed it in everything he did. A father’s relationship with his daughters needed to be protected and cherished.
Spending the day with the girls in their home stirred a longing in Zoe. When Mom had dropped Griffin off this afternoon for a couple of hours, the house had seemed almost complete. Of course, Sully being away created a hole felt by everyone, even Riley.
She could see herself living in the three-bedroom ranch home with the sturdy oak shading the deck and large backyard and being a part of this family. She’d make sure the girls never doubted they were loved.
What if Sully had chosen her over a decade ago?
Her life would have turned out differently. But she wouldn’t have Griffin, and she wouldn’t trade him for anything.
Zoe set the photo back on the table and pulled her phone out of her back pocket. She thumbed through the texts she and Sully had been sending back and forth. He ended every one the same—with “<3,” the text symbol for a heart.
The time they’d spent together as trainer and client reminded her of the guy she used to know. Then, after Riley and the girls had progressed to where they didn’t need Zoe’s services, she allowed herself to consider the possibility of a relationship with Sully and his daughters that moved beyond the bounds of professionalism and friendship. She wanted to take things slow for everyone’s sake.
No matter how much she tried to fight it, she could no longer deny what her heart was saying—she was in love with Caleb Sullivan. And she had no idea what to do about it.
* * *
From the moment Caleb dropped Sarah and his mother off at his parents’ house, all he could think about was climbing into bed and sleeping until noon.
With the girls, he’d be happy with at least five hours of solid sleep. Now that his father was stable, the doctors encouraged them to go home and get some rest. Sarah and his mom planned to go back to the hospital tomorrow, but he needed to be there for the girls. He couldn’t be away from them for long stretches at a time.
Every time he left, Ella asked if he was coming back. Even on the phone that evening, he’d promised he’d be home tonight. She’d see him when she woke up in the morning.
As he turned onto his street, his front porch light shined like a beacon against the midnight sky, filling him with warmth knowing someone was waiting for him. He longed for that to become permanent.
Once he parked the car in the attached garage, he headed into the kitchen through the side door. The scent of lemon cleaner lingered in the air.
Zoe stood at the sink with her back to him as she hummed and swayed to the music playing in her ears. A cord led from her back pocket to her ears, which explained why she didn’t turn when he entered.
He walked up behind her, slid his arms around her waist and lowered his lips to her ear. “Hi, honey. I’m home.”
She gasped and swiveled in his arms. Seeing him, a smile spread across her face. She gripped his upper arms. “Hey, you.”
Loose strands of hair escaped her clip and framed her face. Water splattered her Shelby Lake Lions sweatshirt. He breathed in the sweet fragrance beckoning him to come closer.
All too happy to oblige, Caleb lowered his head and kissed her. “Hi, yourself.”
Without releasing her, he turned so his back was against the sink and she wouldn’t feel pinned. “I missed you.”
Her arms curled around his neck. “I missed you, too. How’s your dad?”
“He’s stable. They did an EKG and ended up putting in a stent. They’ll monitor him over the next seventy-two hours. If anything happens
, it’s usually in that time frame.”
“Glad to hear he’s better. How’s your mom?”
“She’s tired. Sarah is staying with her tonight. They’ll go back tomorrow.”
“Sully, if you want to go back, I can stay with the girls again.”
“You’ve done so much already, Zoe. Besides, I can’t stay away from the girls for that long. How were they? I hope they didn’t give you too much of a hard time.”
“Are you kidding? They’re adorable.” She shared how they spent the day and concluded with Ella’s questions after she read the story.
Caleb sighed and rubbed a thumb and forefinger over his eyes. “I know they miss their mom. It’s tough trying to be both mom and dad to them. What if I screw up? What if I miss something important?”
“Sully, you pay attention to the details. When we were at Bartlett, you kept me from failing algebra.”
“I was paid to be your tutor.”
“Maybe so, but you went the extra mile putting it into terms I’d understand. You never forgot my favorite ice cream flavor. You remembered my birthday when Kyle forgot. You walked me across campus after my night class. You drove me all the way back to Shelby Lake when my battery died just before spring break. Cut yourself some slack.” She cupped his cheek. “It’s okay to miss the little things from time to time as long as you remember the big stuff. You see me like no one else does, Sully, and to me, that’s huge. You’re a good man. Never doubt that.”
Her words soaked in and patched up the worn-out, torn pieces of his heart that had been gashed open by his own unwillingness to forgive himself for keeping his family from falling apart.
He reached for her hand and squeezed. “Thank you, Zoe. You have no idea how much that means to me. Do you mind if we go into the living room? I’m beat.”
“No, not at all. Can I get you anything?”
“You don’t need to take care of me.” He reached for her hand as they headed for the couch.
When he’d left this morning, a basket of the girls’ clothes had been sitting on the chair. Their dolls littered the floor. A sheen of dust and dog hair lay on the table.
The basket was missing, toys had been cleaned up, the table dusted and marks in the carpet showed the vacuum had been run.
“Zoe, you didn’t need to clean my house.”
“I love to clean, so it was no problem. Besides, the girls helped, and we had fun doing it.” She handed him a folded paper and a stack of envelopes. “The girls colored you a picture. Here’s your mail, too. I don’t know where you usually keep it.”
“Thank you.” He opened the white paper to find Ava’s blobby shapes and Ella’s stick people. Neat lettering—Zoe’s obviously—above the people noted them as Daddy, Avie and Ella. Off to the side, a little blob had Riley written above it. He grinned. “A family portrait.”
Zoe peered over his shoulder. “I do see the resemblance.”
He set the picture on the table and leafed through the pile of mail, separating bills from junk. A manila envelope with no return address lay at the bottom of the stack.
He slid a finger under the seal and tore it open. He pulled out a couple of photos and a short note. It read: “What do you think of your ‘friend’ now?”
Caleb frowned, then flipped over the photos, leafing through them quickly. His heart ratcheted against his ribs.
No.
No way.
The photos showed Zoe standing outside a dive bar, hanging on to another woman, who appeared three sheets to the wind. He squinted and pulled the photos closer to his face. Was that a beer bottle in her hand?
Ice sluiced through his veins.
He braced his elbow on his knee and dug the heel of his hand into his forehead. He was an idiot. A fool. Why did he think people could change?
Zoe touched his shoulder. “Hey, are you okay? You’ve gone white.”
He stiffened and dropped his hand to look at her. Genuine concern marked her face. He tossed the pictures in her lap and slumped against the back of the couch. “You tell me?”
She pictured up the photos, sucked in a breath and pressed a hand against her mouth. “Where did you get these?”
“Is that you?”
“Yes, but—”
“No buts, Zoe. I truly thought you were different.”
“I am different, Sully, but I was there for a reason.”
“Of course you were. Between my years on the force and being married to an alcoholic, I’ve heard all of the excuses, the reasons, the lies. I’m not stupid.” He jumped to his feet and paced in front of the couch. “Or maybe I am. I let my guard down and fell in love with you all over again.”
“You love me?”
“Like I said, I’m an idiot. I’ve had a long day. If you don’t mind...”
She shook her head, tears glimmering in her eyes. “Wait a minute. Don’t I get a say in this? A chance to explain? I never want to do anything to hurt you or the girls.”
“Too late for that.” An ache pulsed in the pit of his stomach.
“I’m sorry for what your ex-wife did to you, but you need to realize I’m not like her.” Zoe picked up her purse off the table and slid the strap over her shoulder. “Things aren’t what they seem, Sully.”
“Apparently not.”
A tear trailed down her cheek as she pressed her palm to her heart. She gave him a sad smile. “If you can’t trust me and believe a picture over the past weeks we’ve shared, then I guess I’m not the right person for you after all. Goodbye, Caleb.”
The door closed behind her with a whispered click. Caleb shoved his hands into his pockets and forced himself not to run after her. What if he’d made a mistake?
No.
He had to stand his ground. He had his daughters to protect. They’d went through enough with their mother’s addiction and abandonment. He wasn’t going to subject them to that lifestyle all over again. Or himself. He couldn’t take it again. He was finally regaining some sense of stability.
So why did it feel as if his heart had been dragged down the street behind Zoe’s car?
Chapter Thirteen
No matter how hard she ran or how many times she tried to erase it from her memory, Zoe couldn’t forget the look on Sully’s face when he tossed those photos onto her lap.
For a fleeting moment, his eyes showed what others had said time and time again—redemption wasn’t meant for someone like her.
The early morning breeze cooled her heated cheeks as she ran along the path winding around the lake. She tightened the leash around her right hand and looked at Harper running alongside her. “Let’s do one more lap, girl.”
Harper panted in reply and maintained a similar pace.
Zoe’s feet ate up the dirt path in measured strides. Her lungs burned as her joints and muscles heated. An ache under her ribs caused her feet to slow. Her chest heaved as her limbs, fueled by adrenaline, trembled—from her workout or her self-loathing, she wasn’t quite sure.
How long did it take for broken hearts to heal? Or even for the pain to diminish a little?
Hers was going to take an eternity.
Somehow Zoe would manage to keep the pieces intact. She’d done it before, and she’d do it again.
Once Sully no longer needed her dog-training services, she should have dropped contact, but she continued to gravitate to him like a moth to a flame. Like that moth, she ended up getting burned.
Her eyes burned from getting only three hours of sleep after she left Sully’s. Her head throbbed from her crying jag. The three cups of coffee she had downed to feel somewhat human curdled in her stomach.
She pulled off her James & Son Insurance baseball hat, rubbed the seam of her running shirt over her forehead, then readjusted the hat on her head, pulling her ponytail through the back
loop. She slipped her sunglasses onto her face, paused to retie her shoe, then guided Harper back home.
She needed to get ready for work.
Her feet slowed as the cabin came into view.
Leona sat in her great-grandfather’s rocking chair with her feet up on the railing and sipped from a Cuppa Josie’s to-go cup.
Zoe bent and grabbed her knees to catch her breath. She swallowed her fatigue and climbed the steps, forcing a smile onto her face. “Hey, Leona. What’s up?”
Leona pointed to the twin to-go cup sitting on the small table between the rockers. “Want a cup?”
Her stomach chugged at the thought. Zoe held up a hand and shook her head. “I’ve had three already.”
“Three? Girl, you’re going to be buzzing.”
That was the point, stay busy so she didn’t have time to think, time to dwell on the look that’d crossed Caleb’s face when he’d asked her to leave. Or the way his “I love you” echoed inside her head. Or the way her heart shattered on the floor of her chest in a billion shards.
Leona cocked her head and searched Zoe’s face. “You okay?”
“I will be.” Fresh tears pricked the backs of her eyes. If she said anything else, she’d be crying on Leona’s shoulder. She didn’t want to deal with another headache.
Leona leaned forward and patted the other chair. “Have a seat and tell Leona what’s going on.”
She couldn’t talk. Not when the wounds were still fresh.
“Shouldn’t we be getting to work?”
“Travis is there. He can handle the fur kids for a few minutes. I wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Couldn’t this have waited until I got to work?”
“I have a lot of catching up to do once I get to the office, so I wanted to stop by before I got my nose buried in paperwork. This way I can talk to you without distraction.”
Zoe settled into the rocker and rested her head against the frame. “How’s your mom?”
“She’s better and recuperating at the nursing home near their house. Dad needs the rest.” Leona tucked her feet under her thighs and reached for her coffee. “You know, Zoe, I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done around here while I spent so much time at the hospital with Mom.”