“Forrest.” Henry’s calling of his name caused Forrest to move away from Ellen. “I’ve been uh, thinking about what you asked me.”
“An-ray.” Forrest held up his hand to Ellen as if he were going to take care of it so they could have their moment. “Ef you donut mund. El-loon und uh are fin-ness-ing our det.”
“I kind of do mind, Forrest.” Henry moved closer to them. His eyes could barely focus, and he rattled with words to say in his mind. “I really do mind. See, we’re still, still dedicated. And ... I wasn’t thinking when I said it was all right for you to take her out. I’d really rather you not touch Ellen.”
“El-loon.” Forrest took on a chivalrous look. “Oon-loss you want me to stay. Uh moos buck away. An-Ray es my frund. Uh donut want to hut dat.”
What Ellen really wanted to do was chew Henry’s ass out for interfering in her life. But swallowing her hostility toward Henry, Ellen decided to take his saving grace. “I completely understand, Forrest, completely. I’m with you, though I hate it.” She gave glaring eyes to Henry. “We’re still legal. Thanks for the date.” She extended her hand to the little old man.
“Et hes ben ma pleasure.” Forrest took her hand and brought it to his mouth and kissed it.
Ellen felt the feel of his too-soft lips.
“An-Ray.” Forrest released Ellen’s hand. “El-loon. Goodnight.” Like a gentlemen, Forrest stepped back, turned, and walked slowly away.
Henry stammered a step to Ellen. “El ...”
“You’re drunk.” She brushed by him.
“No.” Henry reached out to her quickly pulling her back. “Ellen.”
“Henry, let me go.” She placed her hand over his and pulled his fingers from her wrist. “What do you want?”
“I want to talk to you.”
“I want to go home.” She moved by him.
“Dean’s not there. He’s hanging out with Frank.”
Though Ellen thought that odd, she didn’t make mention of it. “Then I’ll go to Frank’s. Excuse me.”
“Why don’t you want to talk to me?” Henry asked as he followed her.
“What is there to talk about? I don’t want to stand here and discuss us, with you. We’ve done that. That is not an option.”
“I don’t want to do that either.”
“Then why are you chasing me, Henry?”
“Because I just want to talk to you.” His head dropped down. “Just talk. About anything,” he spoke with desperation. “I just want to talk to you. You, El.”
“No.”
“Come on,” Henry called out in a near sluggish whine. “I helped you with Forrest.”
Ellen stopped walking and turned around to face him. “So you want paid back?”
“Don’t you think you owe me?”
“I can’t believe this is you talking.”
“I don’t care how I sound.” Henry tossed his hands up. “If that’s what it takes to get you to come home and just talk to me, then I’ll be a dick to do it. Please, El, let’s go and talk. I promise I won’t bring up us. Fifteen minutes.”
“I don’t think so, Henry. Fifteen minutes is fifteen minutes too much. You’re drunk go talk to someone else.”
Ellen walked off, and Henry turned in the direction of the Social Hall.
The Social Hall was its usual rowdy-loud for a Friday night when Henry stormed in there. The first thing he did was go to the bar, pouring himself something stiffer to drink than just his wine. He downed it then poured another. He turned from facing ‘Sam’ the mannequin to the women who had gathered in their typical circle after their Friday meeting. A part of Henry was hoping that Ellen would return to her ‘moon tribe’. In fact, in his angry march to the hall, he had convinced himself of it. And he became angrier when he saw she wasn’t returning.
Henry stood there for at least ten minutes, finally bringing himself to a sip when he hit his third drink. Thinking about Ellen as he stared out at those laughing and having fun, he ran her final words to him though his mind, growing more frustrated. His eyes felt heavy, almost too heavy, and his focus was at its worst. Running his hand down his warm face, Henry took a long drink of his moonshine and set down his glass when he spotted her. With his hands in his pockets and his body feeling as if it weighed three hundred pounds, he walked over to Jenny Matoose who stood laughing with another woman.
“Jenny.” Henry cleared his thickened throat.
“Henry.” Jenny raised her eyebrow.
Henry swallowed, shifting his eyes around, standing in total hesitation.
“Henry? Did you want something?”
“I know ...” Henry closed his eyes, his voice was so graveled, “I know you can help me. Not you personally, but I know ... I know you’re close to these women.”
“Yeah so.”
“I need to be with someone.”
“Sorry.” Jenny turned from him.
“I’m serious, Jenny.”
Jenny faced him again. “I am too.”
“She told me she hates me ... she ...”
“She is hurt. Do you think asking me this is going to help your case?”
“I’m hurt too.” Henry lifted his shoulders so arrogantly.
“You’re also very drunk right now. I can see it in your face. The way you’re standing, acting. Go home, Henry, and sleep it off. I won’t be a part of another mistake of yours.” Making what she felt would be her final turn away from Henry, Jenny felt the burning knot hit her the moment she picked her drink back up, In that moment, she heard a female voice behind her saying ‘then I will, Henry’. Widening her eyes, Jenny slammed down her drink, and spun around seeing Bev move from the Social Hall with Henry. “No.” She charged over to the two. “Henry.” She jumped in front of him. “Come back and sit with me and we’ll talk.”
Henry ignored her and tried to get by her.
“Bev.” Jenny blocked Bev’s way. “If you do this, if you break our bond of women, I will not be responsible when Ellen beats the fuck out of you. In fact, I’ll encourage it. This man is drunk, angry, and he doesn’t need to make a mistake right now.”
Bev blinked long and hard with thought. She stepped back from Henry, moving Jenny with her. “You may have a point, but this man is also very down right now. Jenny, aren’t you the one who preaches to us that it is our responsibility to help them out. I’m not starting a relationship with him. I’m merely helping him through a rough time.” Bev began to move from her.
“Bev, I swear to God if you do this, I will never stand by you through anything. There aren’t that many of us women for us to be stabbing each other in the back. I learned that the hard way.”
“And I learned what someone doesn’t know, won’t hurt them.” With a semi-wave, Bev walked to Henry, placed her arm on his, and walked from the Social Hall with him.
Jenny grunted, her whole body literally moved in that grunt. “Ellen.” As she went to charge for the door, she felt her arm being pulled back.
“Let it go,” John Matoose told her.
“I can’t, John. I have to…”
“Let ... just let it go, Jen.” John brought his hand to his forehead.
“How can I do that?” Jenny asked. “Ellen and I are rebuilding that trust. If I don’t step in right now, what does it do to that trust?”
“You tried. You gave it your best shot. You didn’t fail. Henry failed. Bev failed. If you run to Ellen with this, with her still hurt over this wedding shit, it’s gonna make matters worse. I’m gonna tell you what will happen. One of two things, either Henry will do it, or Henry will chicken out. Either way he’s gonna feel like shit over it, a real piece of shit, no matter what he ends up doing. You know that as well as I do. He won’t give a squat about Bev. It’ll start between them and be over with just as fast. If you go running to Ellen now and she heads over to stop it, she could very well walk into the middle of it. Let it go.” John raised his eyebrows as a slight stern warning to his wife.
Jenny closed her eyes and let out an
emotional breath. Her hands actually shook from frustration, anger, and lack of being able to control what was happening. Jenny knew well that the relationships in Beginnings, between the very few women and multitudes of men, were all intricately woven into their own little groups. That was all well and fine that way, but if someone crosses the boundaries of the threads, Jenny was very much aware at how easily the seams would rip.
<><><><>
Henry’s shirt was the second piece of clothing off, Bev’s top was the first as he had her on his couch. His hand gripped under her short black hair holding her head to him keeping his mouth wide and hard as he moved it across hers. Her back was pressed against the arm of the sofa, and Henry’s other hand grasped her thigh pushing her shorts up and her leg outward making more room for his body as he pressed his waist in a near-rough anger against her. He could feel her one hand holding firm against the back pocket of his jeans. He felt the fingers of her other hand digging into the skin of his back, causing almost a pain, as she moaned with his preluding hard, rigid motions. It added to the surrealism he felt, the dream like state he felt he was in, his feeling of out-of-control.
<><><><>
Frank stopped just one more time as he tried to make his escape from Dean’s house. His hands fell, slapping the sides of his thighs as he turned around and faced Ellen who stood with Dean. “Fine, for the love of God, to get you to shut up and quit bitching, I’ll go over there and tell him to leave you alone. Are you gonna ever tell us what happened?”
“No, but ...” Ellen stared down at her fingers. “He has to stop telling me how much he cares, how much he misses me. It’s not easy because I love Henry as a friend, but I have to get over something first before I can even start that friendship again. If ever. You have to reiterate that.”
Frank grunted.
Dean, without seeing, could tell Frank was getting as frustrated as he was. “Ellen, go with Frank, that way you can make sure things are said that you need said. Okay?”
After a ‘hmm’ of debate, Ellen agreed and walked past Frank, out of the house.
“Dean,” Frank said before leaving. “You can’t see my face, but right now I’m irritated.” He closed the door.
Dean laughed.
Henry’s house wasn’t far, only a few houses, and Frank could see the lights were on. “He’s still up.”
“You sure?” Ellen asked.
At Henry’s house, because he was tall enough, Frank said he’d check and looked in the window. “Fuck. Um ... he’s sleeping.”
“Sleeping?” Ellen giggled. “With the lights on.”
“Yeah, let’s go, I’ll talk to him tomorrow.”
Ellen saw it, something on Frank’s face. “You okay?”
“Yes.” Frank cleared his throat. “Let’s go.” He grabbed her hand.
Ellen was reluctant and tugged her hand from him. “You ... you can’t lie to me, Frank Slagel. When you do, you look away. Look at me.”
Frank didn’t.
“Is he dead in there?”
“What? No. He’s not dead. He’s on the couch.”
Immediately, Ellen started to jump up to see if she could peek in the window.
“Stop.”
“No, I want to see what’s going on.”
“No you don’t.”
Ellen continued to jump. “Yes, I do.”
“No, you don’t. He’s with someone.”
Ellen stopped jumping. “With? You mean like ... with?”
Frank peeked again. “I’d say almost. Both are not really dressed. We knock, they stop. We go ... they ... probably ... will.”
Ellen sighed out heavily. “Who?”
Frank looked again and winced. “Um, Bev.”
“Fuck.”
Frank tilted his head.
Another heavy exhale. “Wow, shows how much he was worried about me. Huh?”
“El, you run around saying you’re platonic. A man has needs.”
“And you have needs, Frank. It’s been awhile. Have you been with someone else.”
“Nah, I have needs for you.” Frank winked.
“OK.” Ellen turned, walked by Frank, and headed to Dean’s.
“You don’t wanna knock?”
“No. I’m done.” She grabbed hold of Frank’s hand. He didn’t budge. “What are you doing?”
“Nothing.” He shook his head and walked with Ellen. “Nothing.”
She walked a few steps, paused, and looked at Frank. “Do you know this actually hurts? I don’t know why, yeah, I do. I trusted him. I really trusted Henry. And it isn’t the fact that he’s with someone else right now, that’s just one of many things. Telling you one thing and me another. Deceiving Dean about an understanding. Then the final thing that drove a wedge in our friendship. How was I so wrong?” After a shake of her head, Ellen just walked again, this time right to Dean’s house.
<><><><>
Frank had a plan. He needed to see for himself what Henry’s reaction would be. He knew Henry was drunk, and he wanted to see the massive amount of guilt.
Dean had no tolerance for the situation and merely commented, “What an idiot,” after being told.
Frank stayed with them a little longer, then informed Dean he’d be sitting on his front step ... just for a little bit.
He lit up a cigarette and waited. If Frank was right, and he knew he was, Henry would be taking a walk.
Henry did.
Quietly on Dean’s front step, Frank heard the screen door and leaning forward, peeked. Bev walked out of the house and the opposite way down the street.
Then ten minutes later, Henry walked out.
Frank figured, Henry would probably head toward Dean’s, see if Ellen was up, stare at Dean’s house, and wallow in self-regret.
Henry walked toward Dean’s and stopped when he saw Frank on the step.
“Frank, you’re smoking.”
“I am.” He hit the cigarette. “You know I smoke. Why the shock?”
“You usually just hide it.”
“Yeah, well, sometimes we think we can hide things but it comes out, so why hide.”
Henry raised the corner of his mouth in a crooked smile.
“You look like you sobered up some.”
“A little. Still feel drunk. But more in control.”
“Ah, well it’s been a hell of a night.” Frank nodded, staring at Henry. Did he miss something? He knew what he saw in that window. With that in mind, and deciding to push the envelope, Frank stood, cigarette dangling from his lips, and he extended his hand to Henry.
With a quirky look, Henry asked, “What’s that for?”
“Thanking you.”
“For?”
“Ending this shit with you and Ellen. For once, for all, for good. No more Henry-comparisons, no more ‘poor’ Henry.”
“Frank, what are you talking about?”
“One word.” Frank sat back down. “Bev.”
“What ... what are you talking about?”
“Are you being coy? I know,” Frank said strongly.
“Know what?” Henry asked and when Frank just stared, Henry tossed out his hand in frustration. “Did she walk down here and say something? Because she’s lying, Frank. She’s a little liar.”
“Henry, enough!” Frank barked. “She said nothing. I saw.”
“What do you mean, you saw?”
Frank huffed out. “Unbelievable. Henry, let me tell you how this night went. Ellen hates that you play on her guilt. That you keep pushing and pushing to make up, be friends again. So she asked me to talk to you. We went to you, your house.”
Frank saw it. Henry swallowed so hard, his Adam’s apple danced.
“The lights were on, she asked if you were sleeping. I only had to lift my head to check. I know what I saw on that couch.”
“Then you saw wrong, Frank. We were talking.”
“That’s an age-old-way to communicate, pal. I know what I saw. Stop this shit.”
Henry closed his eyes. “Did Ell
en see?”
“No. I told her you were on the couch sleeping.”
Henry heaved out a breath. “Thank you. Thank you, Frank, so much. So, she doesn’t know.”
“Oh, she knows. Because I can’t lie to her. I told her.”
Immediately, Henry’s face turned a different shade, and his hand cut through the air. “What the fuck, Frank. You told her? You couldn’t let it go, you couldn’t ...”
“This is your reaction,” the words squeaked from Frank’s mouth as he stood again. “I expected you to beat yourself up. I expected more of a reaction from your mistake.”
“I didn’t do anything wrong, Frank.”
Frank was so stunned he laughed out an ‘Oh my God’. Then he turned. “You run around this place telling her and everyone that you love her, you push the fucking child card, you praised your marriage, platonic or not, and then you are with Bev and that’s not sending a mixed signal.”
“I ... I was drunk, I wasn’t thinking.”
“No you weren’t.”
“What can I do to fix this.”
“Are you kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Why are you so mad at me?”
Frank ran his hand across the top of his head and took a long puff from his cigarette. “You know what kills me? I have known her my entire life and I have never seen her trust her heart to anyone like she trusted her heart to you. Never! Not even me, Henry. Not even me and I deserve that more than anyone. I would never do what you did tonight! Don’t you think I haven’t been given the opportunity more than once, I have. Lots, when Ellen and I weren’t together. Did I take it? No! Did I even think about it? No!”
Frank squinted in anger, his words taking on that high pitch with his hard accent, “It didn’t even cross my mind to consider it! Wanna know why? It’s not just because you don’t screw up what you got, it’s because I love Ellen. I have absolutely no desire to be with anyone else. None. Seven years ago I would have told you the same thing, and I can be certain with my life, that I will feel the same way seventy years from now. It makes me sick to think, that with the way I feel, you’re the one who got her complete trust.” Frank pointed again. “And that’s pitiful. You’re pitiful to me right now.”
The Big Ten: The First Ten Books of the Beginnings Series Page 308