by Dani René
“Then fight for her.”
“She needs space,” he informs me before knocking back another drink, and I grab the bottle, knowing I’m going to have to keep up with him tonight because that’s what we do. We may not be blood, but he’s my brother, and I will not let him drown his sorrows on his own.
“Then fight tomorrow, or the next day. Don’t let this slip you by.”
“Are you wanting me married off to a girl who’s barely nineteen so you can go running around with bikers?” His question stills me, but when I glance at him, I find him grinning. “Asshole. I know you’re going to go, and I wish you luck. Just don’t be a stranger,” he tells me, lifting his glass in a cheers toward me.
“You know I can never leave your ass completely.” I chuckle. “What would you do without me?” Shrugging, I knock back my drink before pushing to my feet. Time for the hard stuff. I grab the Patron and set it between us with shot glasses. “How about a goodbye drinking night with your brother?”
With a laugh, Elian nods, sitting on the edge of the sofa, and he joins me in the first of many shots tonight. I’ll have to say goodbye to Arabella soon as well. And that’s not something I’m looking forward to. Because if my brother’s asshole ways are anything to go by, she’ll probably kick his ass to the curb someday.
I can just hope I’m wrong.
36
Elian
When I reach the meeting spot in the middle of nowhere, I pull out the gun I brought with me. The one I planned on killing Adam with. When I walked out of Black Mountain and came out here to see if the man who killed my father would show up, I didn’t know what I would do.
Killing him would mean I would forever have the guilt of hurting Arabella’s father. But shooting Adam Davenport would also ensure I got my revenge. But as I stand here waiting for him, I realize I need to make a choice.
What means more to me at this point—the woman who stole my heart, or the man who stole my father. Killing her mother hasn’t left me with any guilt. Pandora hated everyone she came into contact with, including her daughter. And when I pulled the trigger, I most certainly didn’t expect to see Arabella’s tears, and I didn’t.
The thought of her being alone at school irks me. Even though Ahren is meant to watch over her, at a distance, all I can do is hope she doesn’t run. I wanted to tell her I’d be back, but I couldn’t. I needed to do this before I went back there. Before I made my appearance back in her life.
“You came.”
I turn to face Adam Davenport. The man looks aged, like he’s been having countless sleepless nights. Perhaps he has. Guilt has eaten away at him, and now that we’re meeting face to face, I wonder if he sees my father in me.
“I did.”
“You brought a gun,” he observes, his gaze flicking between my face and the weapon in my hand. “I wanted to tell you how sorry I am. There was a lot that you didn’t know about him.”
“I didn’t come here to talk about my father. I came here to keep a promise.” I step toward him and notice the glint of fear that flicks in his eyes as he regards me. “Your daughter is mine. I’m not giving up on her, no matter how many times she may send me away.”
He looks at me then, and I lift the gun, pointing it at him. My finger lingers over the trigger, and for a moment, I wonder if he’ll run. But he doesn’t.
His question stills me. “Do you love her?”
Do I?
Yes.
“I do,” I affirm. “I love her more than I’ve loved any woman before, and I know I’ll love her until my final breath.” There’s no lie in my voice, in my words. Arabella is mine and she will always be mine.
“I want her safe.” His voice cracks, and I see the shimmering emotion sparkling in his eyes. “I want her taken care of for the rest of her days.” Even though this man had my father killed, his love for his daughter is endless. Even looking down the barrel of a gun, facing death, all he’s concerned about is her safety, her happiness.
“I can do that.” I lower my hand. “On one condition.”
His eyes widen as he regards me. “Anything.”
“You pay for your sins,” I tell him with conviction in my tone. I came her for revenge. I drove all this way, faced the man before me, and I am not someone who walks away empty handed.
Adam looks at me, and I can tell there is turmoil dancing in his mind. He doesn’t know what to do, how to repent. But I know. I’m well versed in seeking salvation. Only, I found mine with a beautiful woman waiting in Black Mountain for me.
“Anything. Just make sure Arabella is alive, safe, and happy. I want her to be loved. Give her everything she deserves. And tell her I love her.” He trembles, but I’m not sure if it’s fear, or something else that takes a hold of him.
I nod, and then I get my revenge.
37
Arabella
School.
Classes.
But no Elian Donati.
It’s been a week since my world imploded, yet he’s nowhere to be seen. I’ve had my ear pods in every day, ignoring everyone and anyone who would want to talk to me. The playlist has been depressing, heart-wrenching songs have been on repeat. With Tommy gone and my mother murdered by the man I’d been sleeping with, the only part of my past still somewhere in the world is my father.
Forgiveness is a heavenly virtue I don’t possess. The men in my life have lied to me, hurt me, and kept me in the dark while promising to care for me. Elian may not have said those three words I longed to hear, but he did act as if I were his. And for a long while, I believed it. I felt it right down to my bones.
Right now, I’m no longer sure about anything. I haven’t seen him at school, so I’m not sure where he’s gone, but if he’s decided just to leave Black Mountain without even saying goodbye, I need to move on.
At least, that’s what I tell myself.
Elian’s not a man you just get over. He’s everything, all-consuming, and I allowed him to take every part of me with him. And all he left behind were memories that slowly etch deeper grooves into my heart as each day passes.
When I make my way downstairs, I find Aunt Midge sitting at the kitchen table. She looks tired, and I wonder why she doesn’t retire. It’s not like she needs to work. She glances up and smiles.
“Just the girl I wanted to talk to.”
Sliding into a chair, I attempt a smile, which I’m almost sure comes out as a grimace. “Me? What did I do this time?”
She shakes her head, sliding a folder toward me. “This is yours, and I wanted to give it to you as a graduation present. I know you came to Black Mountain because of lies and betrayal, and you haven’t had many chances to just enjoy your time here. But with prom coming up and then your graduation, I thought it would be good for you to have something to look forward to.”
I open it, finding a set of keys along with a card, which has the date and time to be home to meet one of the newest up-and-coming designers from New York. I look up, finding Aunt Midge smiling at me.
“What is this?”
“I’ve spoken to my contacts, and I’ve heard all the buzz is around Shisha who is one of the most sought-after designers, and she’ll be designing your prom dress.” Her grin is sparkling as she stares at me, and I feel bad because I really didn’t want to party with everyone when my heart feels like it’s been ripped out and stomped on.
“I … I wasn’t going to go,” I finally tell her, tears brimming my lashes, turning my vision blurry with emotion.
Aunt Midge takes my hand in hers. “You know, your father was a difficult man. Your mother was as well. We never got on, but there’s one thing I learned from them. Even in their biggest fights, they still did what was expected of them.”
“And that’s why I hated my life,” I counter, “Posing for cameras, smiling when my heart was aching,” I tell her. “It’s not who I am.”
She nods slowly. “I know how that feels. That’s why I moved out here,” she informs me. “But I would like you to go to th
e prom, just because it’s a special day. Do it for me?” I don’t know what to say to her. “I can’t promise that your life will be perfect from here on out, but perhaps I can get your dad to just give you a call.”
“You knew he was alive?”
“Not at first, but he contacted me a month ago to tell me everything. I’m angry, I want to kill him myself, but I think it would be good for you.”
Shrugging, I try once more to smile, but fail. “I guess. I just hate all men.”
Her gaze holds me hostage, keeping me from turning away before she asks the question I’ve been trying to find an answer to. “Do you hate him?”
“Of course, I hate dad for—”
“Not him,” Midge interrupts, causing an image of Elian to spark into my thoughts like a photograph my mind took when I last saw him. “Do you truly hate Elian?”
I open my mouth to say yes, but then I can’t voice it. Because I know I don’t hate him. Not truly. I love him, and that’s what hurts me so much. He could’ve spoken to me, given me the truth instead of hiding everything from me.
“How do you know about Elian and me?” Shock laces my words as I stare at my aunt.
She grins as if she knows everything that happens in this town. And she probably does. “When I saw you with Ahren, I thought you may be dating him, but then when you didn’t bring him home and I still saw you around him, I figured there was more to the story.”
“You’re far too wise, Aunty Midge,” I tell her, a soft smile curling my lips.
“I try,” she informs me with a laugh, but then her expression turns serious. “You know, your parents weren’t good people,” Midge says, and I nod because I was never convinced I came from innocents. I’m a deviant, which makes them just as bad. Probably worse because they’ve had more time to cultivate the sinister things they’ve done.
“I know.”
“Your father was involved in illegal dealings for most of his life, and your mother, my sister, she was … God, she deserves anything that’s coming to her. Since we were kids, she had stolen, lied, and she’d hurt everyone in her path to get where she is. I’m not telling you this to hurt you.”
“I would rather know the truth than to believe lies.” This time, I know it’s the truth. Knowing where I’ve come from will ensure I don’t turn out like them. And that’s what I needed from Elian, the truth.
“Don’t push him away,” my aunt tells me. “I’ve regretted divorcing your uncle for so long, and look at me, this lonely old lady, holding onto a house that’s filled with memories I lost a long time ago.” She laughs, but it’s the first time I truly look into her eyes and see the pain, the heartbreak.
“I’ll think about it. And anyway, you’re not lonely. I’m here.” I push to my feet and round the table to give her a hug. I’m not sure how to get through heartbreak, but for now, I’ll keep my aunt close and hopefully learn how to forgive Elian for lying and for leaving me. Even though I sent him away.
On the way to school, I get lost in the lyrics of “So Far Away” by Martin Garrix, Jamie Scott, and David Guetta on repeat. It’s the only song that has kept my tears at bay but still causes my chest to tighten, reminding me that he did exist.
38
Elian
Exile.
I feel like I’m in fucking exile.
When I spoke to Ahren, I wanted to ensure he knew I wasn’t going after Adam to kill him. As much as I wanted my revenge, my brother made me see that taking Adam’s daughter for my own would be the best revenge. She’ll be happy beside me, and if he ever came near us, I would most certainly end him.
But that’s not what’s bothering me. The thought of her being alone, without me, has me on edge. I should apologize, I should also explain myself, but I’m not good with letting my feelings show. The most I’ve ever bared myself to someone was when I was practically engaged. And look how that turned out. But then again, I know Arabella isn’t my past, she’s my future. She just has to see it that way.
The plan I have set in place is going to be easy to pull off, but if it actually works is going to be the miracle. Which brings me to the house I’ve been at so many times, but I’ve never once come inside and spoken to Midge.
She opens the door for me, and she doesn’t look angry, which has my breath whooshing from my lungs in one fell swoop. There’s a small smile on her face, and I wonder if she’s enjoying me coming to her with my tail between my legs.
“Mr. Donati,” Midge greets me, her hand offered, and I accept. We shake on it, and I feel like this is a woman I can get used to. She’s older, possibly in her late forties, but she comes across as someone who’s still got her youth waiting to be explored.
“Thank you for seeing me,” I tell her as she ushers me inside. “I don’t want to stay long in the event that Arabella gets home early.”
“Don’t you worry about my niece.” She waves her hand in the air as if this is just a normal occurrence in her world. She leads me into the living room I’m almost sure has been styled by a team of designers. The cream colors with pops of purple and blue in the cushion fabrics, along with the throw rug, show off a professional eye to the room. “So, have a seat and tell me what’s going on.”
I settle in, and I’m not sure I want to tell this woman I shot her sister. I didn’t check if Pandora actually died, but I did walk out, leaving her bleeding. The cleanup crew confirmed two bodies, but knowing Pandora, she probably had someone take her place. That is, if she survived my shot.
I breathe deeply before I start. “I wanted to know if I even have a chance at forgiveness from Arabella if I spoke to her. If I were to explain why I did what I did, perhaps she’d see it my way.”
“My niece is stubborn, and I have a feeling you’re the same,” Midge muses, her smile brightening her face. “But I think if you dropped to your knees to apologize for your lies, she’ll come around.”
“I made a mistake. I dealt with her as if she were a pawn in a game, and at first, she was.” Even as the words leave my mouth, I can hear just how bad that sounds. “I’ve done some terrible things in my life, but this was by far the worst.”
“Even after killing my sister?” she challenges, giving me pause. “You’re a good shot, Mr. Donati,” Midge informs me. “I’ve always had a tail on her. My business calls for being careful of people, especially family.”
“I—”
“Please, don’t apologize. That woman got everything that’s been coming to her. Sending her daughter away, bartering her life was nothing compared to what I’ve witnessed. Too bad you didn’t get Adam while you were at it,” she tells me with a grin on her face that shocks me silent.
All this time, I thought she was just an older woman running a business. I didn’t realize she was so in tune with what’s been going on in her family. Living in Black Mountain isolates you from the rest of the world.
“I’m making Arabella go to the prom,” Midge tells me. “I would recommend you make an appearance, and you can show her what you feel. Telling that girl will not change her mind. She’s too fucking stubborn. But if you show her, then she may just give you a chance.”
Her advice slowly sinks in, but even as she tells me what to do, I’m still of two minds about this. Going to a senior prom isn’t exactly what I had in mind when I chose to do this, but if I’m going to get my girl, then I’m going to have to sacrifice my pride and do anything to get her back. Because I will do anything for her.
“You know, Elian,” Midge says. “When I first noticed her smiling all the time, and her excited exploits, I was worried she’d end up in the same situation she was in back home. But she’s not the same. She’s changed, grown up. It was only when she spent the past few days indoors and her friend Marleigh came to me and told me about you and her, that’s when I realized the truth.”
“What truth is that?”
“My niece is in love with you,” Midge informs me nonchalantly as if it’s normal for her to say something like that. Her words cause me to st
ill in shock. “And I have a feeling you’re in love with her, or you wouldn’t be here.”
I nod slowly. “I am. I haven’t told her yet. I haven’t even gotten myself to believe it.” And I still don’t. Even when I told Ahren, it was merely to get him off my back, but now that I look at the older woman staring at me with a piercing gaze, I realize I’m going to have to give Arabella everything.
If she’s going to forgive me, I’m going to have to admit how I feel about her. And that means I’m going to have to say those three words to her.
“Are you ready for this?” Midge’s question lingers in my mind before she says, “Because you have to ask yourself, if you’re not willing to open up to her, you won’t get her back, and it would be best to walk away.”
That causes me to snap my gaze to hers. “I can’t walk away from Arabella.” That’s not a lie. I tried. She told me to leave, and I did, but I didn’t go far.
“Then you know what you need to do.”
I nod.
I do.
I’m going to get my little deviant back.
39
Arabella
I feel out of place.
But I know I belong.
For the first time in my life, I truly belong. The problem is, he’s not here. When I walked into history class and didn’t see Elian at his desk, my stomach dropping to my feet. Not that I expected him to return to Black Mountain after everything that happened, but deep down, I thought he would at least say goodbye. Even if he was angry, all I wanted was an explanation.
Why save me when all he ever wanted was to hurt me?
“Christ almighty.” Marleigh’s overexcited voice startles me. I turn to face her, giving her the first glimpse of the dress. The soft material hugs me like a second skin. Deep red, the color of wine, clings to my hips and glides down my arms. The delicate material hangs off the shoulder, giving way as the dip plunges down toward my lower back where the zipper comes together over the curve of my butt.