Donavan cleared his throat, his smile gone, his eyes narrowed. “Ultrasound first then, as I am a man of my word, I will draw blood off the male.” His voice was colder than it had been, even for him, and there was a sharp edge to it now.
I didn’t let go of Sebastian, and he helped me on to the table. A few moments later Lucy came in, slightly pale, but still doing as Donavan wanted.
She said nothing and the silence was heavy and full of fear, the air around us seeming to thicken, clogging my throat.
The gel was cold and I sucked in a lungful of air. At Sebastian’s concerned look I smiled, “Just cold.”
He nodded, and then Lucy swirled the ultrasound on my little bump and a picture came up on the screen.
“There’s the head,” she said, and shifted the position. “And there’s the heart.”
A staccato not unlike the thrum of hummingbird wings came rushing over the ultrasound and I held my breath. Sebastian stared at the screen then looked at my belly and back again. Emotions filled me up and started to spill over. “That’s our baby,” I said.
“Love too,” Sebastian strangled out, the words rough but I knew. “Love too,” I whispered back.
Donavan stood, a strangled look on his face, and left the room, slamming the door behind him. Sebastian leapt to his feet, a growl on his lips at the sudden noise. I took his hand and pulled him gently back down to sit beside me. “It’s okay Bastian. Just stay with me love.”
He settled back down and Lucy blanched as she stared at me. “He really does love you doesn’t he?”
I smiled back. “Yes, more than I ever imagined.” I paused, took a breath, and asked a question that had been burning in the back of my mind. “Donavan is trying to bring his wife back, isn’t he?”
Lucy stopped what she was doing and looked at me, finally giving me a slow nod. “Juliana is the whole reason he’s doing this. They were married for nearly twenty years, childhood sweethearts. But she doesn’t remember him at all. Just like the rest of them don’t remember their family. It’s why I’m here. To help him find the cure.” There was more than sorrow in her voice; bitterness lay heavy on her words as she all but glared at me and Sebastian.
“Seeing me and Sebastian together hurts you, doesn’t it?” I asked, my voice soft. Again she nodded. I closed my eyes and imagined what it would have been like if Bastian had forgotten me and stayed with Jessica. The pain at the mere thought was instantaneous and overwhelming. I understood why people resented us.
Lucy went back to the ultrasound and slid it across my belly. She stopped over a section that I thought might be the baby’s tummy, but was hard for me to tell with the slight movement that continued through the whole session.
“Hmm,” Lucy’s eyes narrowed, and she slid the reader piece to the left.
“What? Is something wrong?” My heart started to speed up at the concern on Lucy’s face. Sebastian picked up on my anxiety and started to stand, his face tight with worry.
“I don’t know Mara. The baby is healthy, but I’m just not sure. I have to get Donavan back in here, I don’t use this enough.” She put the ultrasound down and left the room; I started to shake. Not again, I couldn’t go through losing another baby. Please God, don’t let this happen to us again.
I covered my face with my hands and Sebastian leaned over me, cradling my head to his chest, hiding me while I sobbed. I tried to pull myself together. When Bastian let out a low growl I knew that Donavan had come back in and I managed to stop the tears and hiccup back the last gulping sob that threatened to pop out of me.
“I’m sure it’s nothing,” he said, smiling at me and placing the ultrasound back on my belly. I grimaced as his fingertips brushed across my skin here and there. I was not comforted by him in the least.
He moved the ultrasound first to the left and then to the right and back again, his grin never slipping.
“What’s wrong with the baby?” I asked, my anxiety getting the better of me.
Donavan turned the machine off and Lucy wiped my belly with a cloth. “The baby seems to have some deformities. It isn’t apparent what exactly the final result will be, but I have no doubt they are a result of the Nevermore drug. You did conceive this child after Sebastian took the shot?”
I nodded, my heart numbing to what he was saying. I licked my lips, trying to work up the spit to ask the question. “But the baby is okay? I’m not going to lose the baby?”
Donavan shook his head slowly. “I don’t think so. But it looks as if it has extra limbs. At least one extra arm for sure. Something I’ve seen on a few of the Nevermores. It’s rare but does happen.”
I let out a sigh and leaned back on the table. Sebastian stared from me to Donavan and back again. “It’s okay, the baby is going to be okay.” I had to trust in that, had to believe that I wouldn’t lose this child, or my husband.
Donavan left the room and Sebastian and I were alone. He bent, laid his ear on my tummy and I put my hand on his head, running my fingers through his dark hair.
Moments later Lucy came in, needle and vial in her hand. “I need to draw blood and then I’ll take you to your ce . . . room.”
I got Sebastian to sit down and Lucy was able to draw blood quickly from him. He didn’t even flinch when she had to jab the needle in. I glared at her and she staved off my words with a wave of her hand. “Their skin is thick like hide, there has to be some force or the needle won’t go in, so no need to give me the stink eye girl.”
I grit my teeth and contented myself with stroking Sebastian’s other hand, tracing the veins and patterns under his skin.
“There,” Lucy clapped her hands, making both me and Bastian jump. “We’re all done.”
I stood and she waved for us to follow her. I took Sebastian’s hand, gripping it tight, as if by sheer force I could keep him here with me. I was deathly afraid to be separated from him and, even if it meant I would be caged like an animal, I didn’t care.
Lucy led us upstairs, which surprised me. The theatre still had much of the local and native artwork up on the walls, but it didn’t hide the fact that the theatre was utilitarian in looks. Everything was cement. Walls, floor, ceiling. Maybe it was for acoustics or maybe just a cost issue, but either way it was far from pretty. We stopped on the third level and took a door down a long hallway. It opened up into the Coast Bastion Hotel and from there Lucy took us to a nice, clean room on the first floor.
“Don’t know why you get this room, but here it is. The water works but don’t expect it to be hot.” We stepped inside and she shut the door, locking it behind her.
Alone with Sebastian, I stripped out of my clothes and walked to the bathroom. I didn’t care if the water was cold; I just wanted to be clean. I think it had been nearly a week since my last bath in the bunker.
I cranked the water on, fully intending to have a bath. I could pretend I was camping at the lake or something.
As the tub filled I peeked back into the main room to see Sebastian sitting on the floor, his back against the wall so he could stare at the bedroom door. His breathing was rapid, his chest rising and falling so fast I thought for a moment he might be having a heart attack.
“Bastian?” I ran to his side and dropped to my knees. His arms circled me and he held on to me as he gulped down great gasps of air. It took me a moment to realize that he was crying, sobbing so hard he could barely get air in to breathe past the emotions.
I closed my eyes and held him, instinctively knowing the reason. Somehow, despite the fact that what Donavan had said was beyond simple instructions or words, Sebastian understood that something was wrong with the baby. That the deformation the child now had was because Sebastian took the Nevermore shot.
“Babe,” I took his face in my hands, stared into his yellow eyes, and stroked my fingers across the skin that was becoming as familiar to me as its human counterpart. “It doesn’t matter. The baby will be alive and will be with us. And we will love him no matter how he looks.”
Tears s
treamed from his eyes as his chest continued to heave and he shook his head, hiccupping hard enough to shake his body. I fought the tears that wanted to join him with his, but he needed me to be strong for him and I could do that much at least. He’d given up so much for me, fought so hard, the least I could do was be his rock now.
19
“Babe,” I whispered. It was the third morning of our stay in the compound. Sebastian grunted and rolled over in his sleep, giving me his back. I traced the yellow lines that made up the shadowy tattoos, the tingle in my fingertips not solely from the scotch broom he carried. I followed the lines down to his hips, swirling my finger over each whirl. Donavan had Lucy take blood from both of us every day, morning and night. I don’t know if it was helping his research, but for the moment we were useful to him and that kept us alive.
Sebastian grunted and scooted away from me. I slapped him hard on the hip, snapping him awake. He rolled over and frowned at me; I glared at him.
“I’m allowed to touch you.”
His frown deepened and he got out of bed.
“I mean it Sebastian.”
Ignoring me he walked to the window and stared out, the view over the harbour something he would watch for hours on end, hardly moving a muscle. I got up and went to stand beside him, to see what it was he was looking at.
What was left of the pack milled about, scavenging for food amongst the docks, staying far from the water. They screamed if even a single small wave splashed against them, which I thought was strange, but was the least of my worries.
I swallowed hard. “Do you miss them?”
Sebastian shook his head, then nodded and shrugged his shoulders. I wondered what it was like for him, living between the two worlds, not really human, not really a Nevermore. I had a feeling that if it took much longer for the cure I would lose him, the pull of his instincts strengthening every day. The call of the pack and the wildness in him was more than apparent as it battled against the love he held on to for me.
I slipped on my clothes and banged on the bedroom door till Lucy came and opened it. Her bedroom was two doors down from ours, so she could keep an eye on us. “What is it?” She asked, her hair dishevelled and her eyes at half mast.
“I need to speak to Donavan,” I said, as I pushed my way past her and ran down, through the long hallway and down the three flights of stairs.
The basement was where the lab had been set up. It was easy to find, even though I’d never been there. Despite the early hour, Donavan was already up tinkering away at his tests.
I began to pace the room. “He’s slipping further away Donavan. I don’t want to wait to see him completely transformed. How soon before you have something ready?”
Donavan smiled, tucked his hands behind him, and paced a small circle around me. “Do you think you’re the only one who’s lost a loved one to Nevermore?” He snapped at me, his grin never slipping, though his tone was far from congenial.
I flushed. “Of course not.”
“Then what the hell makes you think I would go to the ends of the earth for your precious Sebastian? I’m doing this for Juliana, to bring her back to me. If the antibodies he carries can help me find a cure, then he is valuable to me, and only then,” he snapped.
He walked up to me, his face twisted with the jealousy and frustration that must have been simmering for the entire time we’d been here. “The only reason you and Sebastian are being treated as well as you are is that you are my only hope for some sort of breakthrough. If Sebastian is slipping away then he is no more use to me than any of the other Nevermores.”
“What are you saying?” I asked, a whisper of foreboding passing over me.
“If Sebastian is not the link I need to find the cure, then I’ll dispose of him as I have all the other Nevermores. We don’t feed the monsters, Mara.”
“You feed Juliana,” I said, though in fact I didn’t know that, I’d never seen his wife.
“She’s different.”
“So is Sebastian.”
We stared at each other, only a foot between us. I wouldn’t back down; I owed it to Bastian to fight for him.
“We’ll draw more blood today and see if the cell count is different. Perhaps he’s not changing at all; perhaps he’s just giving up on being human,” Donavan said, as he turned and slipped on a lab coat and safety glasses, ending our conversation.
I ran back up to our bedroom; Lucy was waiting to see me in. She pointed and I went in to find Sebastian pacing. God, if I could only know what he was thinking! I shut the door behind me and leaned against it, as Lucy locked it once more. Sebastian stopped his movement and stared at me, his bare chest rising and falling evenly with each breath. I couldn’t lift my eyes to him so I stared at the hollow of his throat. If Sebastian didn’t hold the key to the cure, Donavan would kill him and I couldn’t let that happen.
“Sebastian,” I whispered. “We have to go; we have to find a way to escape.”
He walked over to me and put a hand on either side of the door, effectively caging me with his body. He let out a low growl and placed his lips on the side of my neck, nipping at the skin lightly, and then, bringing his hands in to touch my shoulders, he ran them down to my fingertips. Pressing his body against mine he put his lips to my ear.
“Love.”
I couldn’t hold the tears back and I wrapped my arms around his neck, clinging to him. I wouldn’t lose him, not when we’d both fought so hard to be together.
We tumbled backwards into the bed, clothes disappearing in a rush of desperation to touch one another. For a moment the intimacy pushed the fear back, leaving only a blazing fire of love and desire to scare away the dark that was coming.
I lay in his arms, body tingling, heart racing, and I knew what I had to do.
Lucy was my only hope. I’d seen how she stared at Donavan, her eyes soft and full of emotion. Maybe she could convince him to change his mind, to help me keep Sebastian safe.
“I need to speak to Lucy,” I whispered into his ear, kissing the edge. He reached up and stroked my face, his other hand pressed against my breast, distracting me. Most effectively. I smiled, and then moaned as he began to work my body over, his gaze never leaving mine. “Sebastian, I have to . . .”
I gave up and surrendered to his touch, the whisper of his lips on mine, the brush of skin tingling with passion.
When I was finally able to untangle myself from Sebastian the sun was high and I had the beginnings of a plan. Body still humming with Sebastian’s caresses, I banged on the door until it opened. “What now?” Lucy grumbled.
“Can I talk to you?” I asked.
“We are talking. You look a little flushed,” she said, her eyes roving over my reddened skin, reactions to Sebastian’s touch and saliva breaking out all over my body. Ah, what I wouldn’t give for a dose of Benadryl.
“Yeah, I’m okay,” I cleared my throat. “I need to talk to you about Donavan.”
Lucy blinked and her eyes widened. “Why?”
“He’s going to kill Sebastian if the key to the cure isn’t in the next round of blood work.”
Lucy stepped back to let me through. “I’m not surprised, it’s what he does.”
I fell into step beside her as we walked down the circular hallway. “I know, but I made the mistake of saying that I was worried about Sebastian slipping. It was a moment I can’t take back, even though it isn’t true.”
Lucy shook her head, messy bun bobbing slightly. “What do you want me to do about it?”
I took a deep breath. “I know how you feel about Donavan; I see it in your eyes. Keep him distracted while we try to get away.”
She flushed, her face going bright pink; then she let out a strangled laugh. “You think I haven’t been trying honey? There was only one time and he was plastered. It was right after Juliana tried to kill him. Donavan’s as devoted to her as you are to Sebastian. You think someone could seduce you away from your man?”
I thought of Marks and slowly shook
my head. “No. I suppose you’re right.”
I stopped and rubbed my face, burying my hands into my hair. What the hell were we going to do?
“I didn’t say I wouldn’t help you. I just don’t think I can seduce him. Here,” she handed me a key. “This will get you outside, but from there you’re on your own.”
I tucked the key into my jeans pocket. “I don’t know when, but we’ll leave as quickly as we can; I don’t want to test Donavan’s patience, or his sanity.”
I walked back upstairs to our room to find it empty, the door wide open. My heart pounding, I searched the room. There was no way Sebastian could have opened the door, he didn’t have the motor skills.
Donavan.
I turned and ran back down the stairs, scrambling at each landing to pick up speed. As I reached the bottom floor I could hear raised voices, and then a roar of anger from Sebastian.
“Please, please, please,” I whispered under my breath, not entirely sure if I was pleading for more speed or to make it to the lab before Donavan did anything crazy.
The door to the lab was open and I ran through, skidding to a halt at the scene before me. Sebastian was strapped to a metal table, an IV hooked up to his left arm.
Donavan stepped out from behind several IV’s. “Ah Mara. I thought about what you’d said and decided that the next batch of remedy I whipped up would be perfect to try out on Sebastian. Then you can’t say you didn’t try to save him.”
“No,” I gasped. Stumbling to the metal table, I reached for the IV.
“I wouldn’t do that. A half dose would turn him into a vegetable for sure. A full dose is the only chance he’s got.”
I lowered my hand and placed it on Sebastian’s chest. His eyelids flickered, the iris’ wobbling, and I swallowed hard on the bile that rose in my throat.
Donavan stepped up and put his hands on the table. “It will take a week to ten days for the full effects to be known. Then we can decide whether to put him out of his misery, or of course, if he comes around we will administer the same treatment to the others.”
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