by Dan Lopez
The Unnamed Press
P.O. Box 411272
Los Angeles, CA 90041
Published in North America by The Unnamed Press.
1 3 5 7 9 10 8 6 4 2
Copyright © 2016 by Dan Lopez
ISBN: 978-1-944700-29-4
Cataloging in Publication Data available upon request.
This book is distributed by Publishers Group West
Cover design & typeset by Jaya Nicely
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are wholly fictional or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever. Permissions inquiries may be directed to [email protected].
For Mom & Pop & Cal
Contents
Part One: Entre One Summery another Winter
Part Two: The Road to Disney World
Part Three: “You’ll stay with me, Papi?”
About the Author
PART ONE
Entre One Summery another Winter
I’LL WAIT FOR IT HERE, THADDEUS THINKS, CONTEMPLATING the long, rectangular pool. A few dead leaves float on the surface, some bugs. He makes a note to call and have it cleaned as soon as they return next week.
He can see Cheryl through the sliding glass door, seated at the kitchen table balancing the checkbook, receipts spread out neatly to her left. He’d like to go inside and sit with her—maybe tell her that they should schedule an appointment with the pool-cleaning service—but she prefers to be alone when dealing with the finances. Anyway, she promised to bring him a glass of chardonnay and a ham sandwich as soon as she finishes. All he has to do is wait, but he’s too nervous about tomorrow to sit still for long, so he walks around the yard, kicking palmetto fruits off the concrete slab and onto the grass as he goes. He just has to get through these next few hours, he reminds himself, and then they’ll be on their way to Stevie’s house and everything will be fine. His breathing is labored; his joints crack, but it feels good to move.
The breeze bends a low-hanging frond from a nearby palm to the surface of the pool, and with some effort he drops to one knee alongside it. He dips a finger in the cool water, sending ripples lapping against the scummy blue tile. Too cold for swimming. Haltingly, he drags himself back to his feet. Drying his finger on his pants, he heaves a sigh. Ordinarily, a heater keeps the water pleasant year-round, but last night Cheryl shut it off in anticipation of the exterminators’ arrival—no sense in wasting money on something they won’t be around to enjoy.
It’s not just the water that’s cold. By Apopka standards, it’s a chilly night. But he doesn’t mind. Winter in Central Florida can reinvigorate what the long summer has stymied. Yes, he thinks, as he strikes out across the patio with renewed vigor; the cold weather is just what they need. He stubs his toe and stumbles on a root that has cracked a row of pavers. “Something new to fix,” he mutters. But he doesn’t scream. There was a time when he would’ve screamed, when he would’ve thrown things and hit things like an enraged child. Cheryl always calmed him down in those moments. She’s the only one who ever could. She’s saved his life in a million little ways like that over the years, and though he doesn’t say it nearly enough, he’s thankful for that, for her. But he doesn’t need her help tonight. Maybe it’s the meditation videos he’s been watching on YouTube, or maybe it’s a natural result of age; either way, he’s mellower these days. The rages seem to have at last abandoned him. So what if a root has cracked some stone? It was probably time for a renovation anyway. This whole backyard has gone to pot. Take these two weathered lounge chairs, for instance. Ferreted away in a corner, they see more rain than sun, and what’s the point of lounge chairs if you can’t catch some rays? He’s been lazy about upkeep, has allowed things to slide. But that’s finished now. Things are going to change.
Using the moon as an approximation for the sun, he shoves the lounge chairs into a V formation. Their flaky legs leave chalky trails on the concrete slab. He wipes away the grime that has accumulated, perhaps for decades, on the mildewed vinyl slats. A small table—its opaque surface pockmarked by water stains—fits nicely between the chairs.
He eyes the arrangement for symmetry, nods with satisfaction. Then he takes a moment to catch his breath. It’s a start. A few minutes—that’s all it took, and some focus. Simple work. He tests the pool once more. Again he dries his finger on his pants before walking away. He taps a porch sconce. A handful of dead bugs tumble off the sun-yellowed plastic cover. “Good, good,” he mumbles.
When tomorrow goes well, the rest of the week will be a piece of cake, and then it’s only a matter of time before Stevie and the whole family will want to visit to use the pool, and won’t it be nice to have everyone here together? That’s what backyards and pools are for, family, and really, all in all, this backyard isn’t in bad shape; it just needs some attention.
A string of tiny bodies scurrying up the back wall catch his eye. Leaning close, he watches them file into a minuscule fissure between the stucco and a paint-speckled outlet. Termites. Their white bodies stream into the dark recesses of his home. He lumbers over to the wall-mounted garden hose nearby and gives it a sturdy yank (the hose is old and the plastic often sticks). It releases from its cradle with a squeal. With his free hand he fishes his reading glasses from his breast pocket, then studies the nozzle, moving it back and forth until the tiny faded glyphs etched along the rim come into focus. He settles on a powerful jet setting and fixes his sights on the intruders. Tomorrow the professionals will deal with the rest of them, but tonight he can have a little fun. He squeezes the handle and drowns the termites in a whitewater torrent.
“Hasta la vista, baby!” He grinds the fallen into the wet concrete with a toe.
Satisfied, he slings the hose back onto its cradle, letting the loops sag like a belly.
The sliding door whooshes in its track and Cheryl emerges wearing a shimmering nightgown offset by a pair of threadbare Minnie Mouse slippers. “What are you doing?”
“Huh? Oh, termites.”
She nods and thrusts a plate at him. “Here,” she says, and he’s confused for a moment. It’s only when she hands him a glass of chardonnay that he remembers that he’s been waiting for her.
“Sit with me a minute,” he says, tapping the lounge chair. His fingers leave dirty prints on the wineglass.
She remains standing. “Put everything in the sink when you’re finished and don’t stay up too late. The exterminators will be here first thing in the morning. I want you well rested for tomorrow.”
He nods and returns to his wine. Sipping it theatrically, he praises the hints of citrus, all the while waiting for her to sit beside him. Anticipating it. “What an intoxicating beverage.” He shoots her the mischievous eyebrow. “Is that a new nightgown?”
“No.”
“It looks great on you.”
He purses his lips for a kiss. Instead, she kisses a finger and lightly taps the corner of his mouth. He tastes the minty flavor of her oily hand cream.
“I’m going to bed,” she says. “You should, too.”
“Oh?”
“Not like that. I’m tired.”
He folds his chin into his neck like a wounded anhinga. And for a moment he seems to have pinned her reclusive tenderness, because instead of marching straight inside as she often does, she lingers by a second set of sliding glass doors, this one leading to their bedroom.
“Thaddeus?” Her tone, if not outright sweet, is at the very least significantly less guarded. “Tomorrow, promise me you’ll behave? It’s a very nice thing Steven and Peter are doing, letting us stay with them.”
“I think Steven’s finally ready to move on. When I think of all the time we’ve wasted—”
“Remember when we built this pool?” He knows to interrupt her when she tenses. He doesn’t have many tricks, but he has this one and it usually works. “Stevie got so mad because we had to rip out that... that tree—what was it called?”
“Kumquat,” she says cautiously.
“Kumquat. Right.” He takes a large bite of the sandwich and struggles with it for a minute. Crumbs catch in his stubble. “We’ll be fine,” he says, smiling. “No big deal.”
“Promise me you’ll behave. Please.”
He nods. “Stevie’s a good kid.”
A sudden breeze sets the palm fronds chattering and she clutches her gown at the throat. “Just be yourself tomorrow, huh? Only maybe a little more subtle.”
“I should do something special for them. To thank them for the hospitality. Maybe I’ll buy them a boat. You remember how much Stevie loved fishing when we went to the Keys.”
“He’s never liked fishing.”
“Sure he did! He loved it.”
She rubs her temples. “Where are they going to keep a boat? They don’t live on the water. Stop inventing things. Besides, you already bought Gertie that doll.”
He scratches his chin. “Those were good times. You remember.” He smirks at the memory. “Something really great.”
“You’ve done enough. Just be nice. That’s the only thanks anybody needs right now.” As if closing a box, she folds her hand and turns to enter the house. “And don’t stay up too late. It’s getting cold.”
He wishes her good night, but she’s already inside, so he finishes his sandwich and wine before digging around in a terra cotta planter for his stash. Cheryl always hides it in the same place for him, so it’ll be easy to find.
The pipe isn’t much to look at, just a heavy piece of glass a little bigger than his palm, the bowl chipped and darkened from years of use. He’s had better pipes, but he likes this one best because it was a gift from Stevie. It might have been a souvenir from someplace Stevie visited in college. He seems to recall a foreign name, long faded, painted alongside the carburetor. Who remembers the particulars? The important thing is that it was a gift, and he often imagines sitting here with his son, their feet dangling in this pool, passing this pipe back and forth like greedy friends stealing a sliver of midnight for themselves, something to hoard just between the two of them. If only they could, then perhaps the decades of animosity would fade away. Perhaps then they could move past the minefield of being father and son and instead be simply two men together in their commonality.
But that won’t be tonight. And tomorrow is for Gertie, he thinks as he inhales. The sky flattens. For a moment he imagines snowfall. It’s not unheard of—rare, yes, but not unheard of. Do they have snow in the country where she’s from? Cambodia? Vietnam? China? He doesn’t know. He blinks and the snowflakes disappear. At any rate, there’s not a lot around these parts. He drifts off, dreams a bit about dolls and weed and Cheryl and Stevie, comes back and drifts off again, repeating the cycle as the temperature drops then rises. And continues to rise and rise.
YOU SHARPEN THE KNIVES. THERE ARE SEVEN. MONDAY through Sunday, an ambitious purchase made before you truly understood the way to work. In that way you were naive. In that way even seduced by the capitalist drive, the allure of a better life through acquisition. The fluorescent light above your head flickers. Light then dark. Light then dark. That will need to be fixed before the open house tomorrow. You make a note, then return to the knives. Occasionally, a blade slips off the whetstone and you nick the granite counter.
You won’t use the knives. That exquisite boy with the cornrows showed you a better way. You took to the visceral bond of a tight grip like ink takes to paper. But the act of whetting a blade remains important. The rhythmic skill brings you peace, prepares you for the night. In this way, you are a fisherman or a hunter caring for your tools. It’s a ritual and rituals are important.
You’re not unusual in any outward way. You could be anyone as you slip into an old pair of high-top sneakers. Your black hair, while habitually dull, drapes across your brow conventionally. Your legs are a bit too long for your trunk, maybe, but that’s nothing a vertical stripe can’t fix. You bite your nails. Realistically, this is a fault. A bad one. Your fingers are unattractive. They catch on fabrics. Streamers hang from the ragged edges, which are a liability in your line of work. You must stop biting them.
Wool is out of the question. You grapple with the closet. The door slips off its track again (that’s something else you’ll fix). A velvet blazer will do. It’s creased from how it was folded in your pack. No big deal. Slip it on.
Keys are next.
Find them. Clip them above the left pocket. Your jeans are tight.
Cologne. Watch. Kefia. The remainder, too, follows an order. Perhaps it’s fetishistic of you to exhibit this penchant for order, for exactitude. How silly to care. How uninspired. Outside the clubs, they are careless: they spit; they laugh—
But they die.
People think they know you, that they know everything. Yet they understand nothing.
Can you feel it? Of course you can. A chilly current flows through the air, a variety rare enough in Orlando. Tonight is certainly a night for a sallow, fidgety boy with a stutter, most likely blond. Someone translucent, like the clarity of winter in the City Beautiful.
Pick a location.
Already, you feel the spring of hardwood beneath your feet, the banal conversations between songs. You dance. You will dance.
Location.
Parliament House is impossible. You went there last Friday. This week there will be too many questions. Have you seen him? Tall. Sunglasses and a topknot. Parents, boyfriends, everyone worries. And you’d just as soon avoid the entanglement.
Location?
Independent Bar.
Park the car. The stereo hisses into submission. The door is not far, then you are inside. Goth music. Black walls. Pop music. Red walls. The wristband—yellow tonight—rips your arm hair. First, a drink. Then skip upstairs for a perch above the dance floor. Above everything. You are above everyone.
Even now, the work remains a rumor. Some are afraid to go out, yes. But not here. Surely they’re safe here. If they travel with friends and don’t pick anybody up... They’re wrong.
“You need a drink,” he says suddenly. He saw you before you saw him. He approached you. Spoke.
“What did you say?”
“You need a drink.”
“Have one already,” you say. You jiggle a glass.
“You don’t get it. That’s cute, you know?” He stands. Bowlegged. Cocks his head to the side and grins. His teeth like a printer’s stamp pressed into his thick lower lip. “You need to buy me a drink.”
“Says who?”
“Ask what I want.” He’s Puerto Rican with a stainless steel lip ring, a tight shirt, and a concave abdomen.
“No,” you say. He won’t do for tonight.
But he’s persistent. He slides onto the neighboring stool and presses his thigh to yours. “You’re salty, papi, but I won’t hold it against you. Vodka cranberry, by the way.” He extends a hand. “I’m Alex.”
“What a coincidence,” you say. “Me, too.”
You shake hands, noting the wide, sinewy finger pads like a frog’s toes. A callus catches you below the thumb. Tonight he’s safe, but maybe some other night he’ll be appropriate. You disappear and a moment later fit his hand with a plastic cup from the bar.
“Drink,” you say, and he does, thanking you. You grin, satisfied with yourself. You spit in tha
t drink.
“Wanna go home?” he asks.
“Things at home aren’t so good right now.”
“What’s that?”
“Nothing. Not tonight.”
Making your vague excuses—the bathroom, a friend waiting—you walk away. You’ve already wasted too much time with him.
The night progresses swiftly once you’ve refocused, and before long you spot your perfect boy dancing alone. He is translucence incarnate.
The rest comes simply. Your left hand meets his right shoulder. Your lips mesh. Can he taste you? No. You lack a distinct flavor; you are a perfect reflection of him even in this way.
“Matthew,” he says.
“No shit. Me, too,” you say. Your place, a string of things you say.
He agrees.
And then you’re both gone, slipped into the night like a knife into its chock.
FEW KNOW BETTER THAN LAILA MORALES THAT SLEEP, AS A luxury, is best enjoyed by the overworked. But all luxuries expire.
In the darkened room she stirs. Wispy tendrils of an amorphous dream—something on a ship, maybe? Or in a car? Or was it an airboat? And wasn’t that an old colleague, a lab partner?—dissolve into her subconscious like a slick of blood diluted in water.
Blackout curtains keep the sun out, air-conditioning maintains a constant temperature, but nothing counteracts a full bladder. Biology wins every time.
The stir deepens, lengthening until wakefulness breaks over her all at once with a race of the heart and a sharp intake of breath.
Squinting, she automatically seeks out the phone on her nightstand, dismissing, unread, the notifications cluttering the display. It’s ten A.M.
Her first conscious thought is Alex.
Her second: Bathroom. Now.
The second, more insistent, compels her to move.
She shuffles across the worn Berber, flicks the switch in the en suite, and yawns her way onto the toilet. She scrolls through her calendar. No work today at least, and for a moment she luxuriates in the blissful relief of a free Wednesday. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t tasks to accomplish. After weeks of tracking, projected forecasts, and escalating warnings, Hurricane Natalie is nearly upon them. They’ll need water, at least a few gallons each. She keeps empty jugs in the truck for just such an eventuality. Gas, too, for the truck, while she’s at it.