by Willow Rose
"I thought about visiting you at the hospital … but …"
"Then why didn't you, BITCH?" He said.
"Excuse me?" She said looking perplexed.
"Why didn't you?" He repeated.
"Well they said on TV that you were married. I didn't want to …"
"Didn't want to what? Didn't want to HARM me? Didn't want to make me SUFFER?"
"I didn't want to destroy your personal life. I mean, I guessed you didn't want your wife to know about me," she said, moving around in her chair like it was uncomfortable to sit in. Henrik discovered he liked to see her squirm in the chair. He liked the way she kept touching her cellphone and holding it close to her in case she needed to call for help. It amused him the way she avoided his eyes. The hand touching her chest and the redness of the skin on her throat. She was nervous. He made her nervous.
"So what can I do for you?" She asked.
"What can I do for you?" He said, imitating her voice, making it sound all shrill and annoying.
She looked at him. She was biting her lip. Then she looked at the phone again and pushed a button like she wanted to make sure it was on. "Listen," she said nervously. Her voice was slightly shivering. "I have to be somewhere …"
"No you don't," Henrik said.
"Excuse me?"
"You don't have somewhere to be. You're just saying that to get rid of me. Why Annabelle? Why do you want to get rid of me?"
Annabelle blushed. She shook her head and moved her hands fast. "I … I …"
"You don't know what to say?" He interrupted her. "Let me help you. I make you feel uncomfortable, don't I?"
She bit her lips and looked at him, then nodded. "Yes. Okay yes. This meeting. You coming here and yelling at me makes me feel slightly uncomfortable."
"Why do you think that is?" Henrik said before slurping more coffee.
"What do you mean?"
"Why do you think me being here makes you feel so uncomfortable?" He asked again, slightly annoyed.
"I don't know … I guess it might be the yelling, maybe it's just the way you look at me. Like I owe you something. Like you want to …"
"Like I want to what, Annabelle?"
"Like you want to … hurt me or something," Annabelle sighed and shook her head. "This conversation is getting a little strange."
"You know what I think is strange?" Henrik asked and didn't wait for her to answer. "I think it's a little strange that I have amazing sex with a woman one night in a hotel and then the next morning … I wake up and oops, something is missing. Oh my, oh my. Something pretty VITAL is gone from inside of me. Now how on earth did that happen?"
Annabelle covered her mouth. "Oh my God," she exclaimed. "You think … you think I had something to do with it, don't you?"
"BINGO!" Henrik yelled and slammed his clenched fist into the coffee table causing all the cups to rattle.
Annabelle let out a shriek and got up from her chair. "Get out," she said. "Get out of my apartment right now."
Henrik made the sound of a game show buzzer on TV. "WRONG answer."
"What do you want from me?" She asked with a shivering voice.
Henrik scratched his chin and looked up. "Mmm, let me see. What do I really want from you?"
"I already talked to the police. I told them everything I know. I told them how I met you at the bar. I told them all your bad pick-up lines. I told them about our sex in the hotel room and I told them that I left, that you were awake the last time I saw you and being a real prick."
Henrik laughed manically and slurped more coffee. "Well then, it’s all good, isn't it?" He said. "It's absolutely PEACHY." Then his face turned angry. "Except for the fact that I don't buy it."
"It's the truth. I swear. I had nothing to do with what happened to you. Look at me I'm just a little girl. How would I be able to hold you down? I wouldn't even know where to look for the kidney. I faint just seeing blood."
"Ah, come on. Do you really think I'd fall for that? You could have had help, couldn't you? You could have some guy waiting in the hallway once you exited the room and he could have entered the room. It's as simple as that. How much did he pay you, huh?"
"I … I have no idea what you're talking about. There was no guy. There was only me when I left that night. I might not have closed the door properly, so maybe the guy could have come in that way or something, I don't know. I was pretty pissed at the time. Don't think I worried much about closing the door properly."
Henrik closed his eyes. He was getting sick of this conversation. "How much did he pay you?" He asked again.
"I … no one paid me anything."
"HOW MUCH?"
"Nothing. Why aren't you listening to what I say? I didn't do anything. I came to the bar to meet a nice guy. Guess that makes me a horrible judge of people, huh?"
"I don't believe you," Henrik said.
"Then what do you want me to say? That I'm sorry? ‘Cause I am truly very sorry for what happened to you, but it had nothing to do with me."
"Still don't believe you."
"I'm telling the truth. What do you want from me?"
"I want to know where my kidney is."
"Excuse me?" She asked. "You want what, exactly?"
Henrik got up and stormed towards the girl. He grabbed her around the throat and pushed her backwards against the wall. She was spurting and gasping for air. Henrik kept squeezing while staring into her eyes until no more sound came out of her throat and her body became limp in his hands. Then he let her slide to the ground.
Panting, he bent down and whispered in her ear: "I want to know who has my kidney."
26
SEPTEMBER 2001
ANNA WAS STARING AT the bike, then back at Valdemar. She couldn't believe what she saw. "You made this?" She asked.
The boy nodded. Anna touched the new handlebars that Valdemar had somehow managed to put on the new bike. They were extremely long and bent in a u-shape.
"I made it myself. Using dad's welder."
"You know how I hate it when you use that thing," she said, without being really angry. This was truly spectacular. You couldn't even tell that the handlebars didn't originally belong to the bike.
"But how … how does it work?" She asked anxiously. It was hard to picture how Valdemar was supposed to use this.
"Take it outside and I'll show you," he said.
"I can put it on the grass so you won't hurt yourself when you fall," Anna said feeling very nervous about the whole thing.
She dragged the bike out of the garage and onto the grass where she put it up against the big birch tree in the front yard. Then she turned and looked at Valdemar with her heart in her throat.
All this for what? To impress his dad? To show him he is good enough? That he is worthy of his love?
Anna felt the tears press from behind her eyes, but held them back. This was a happy moment for Valdemar. He didn't need to see her cry. Valdemar turned and smiled at his mother. She smiled back and gave him a thumbs-up. By putting his head on the handlebars and using his mouth and toes, he climbed onto the bike. Anna jumped forward when he was about to slip down, but stopped herself.
He can do this. You know he can. If he wants it bad enough. You know he can. He has proven it before.
Valdemar managed somehow, someway to get to the seat and sit on it, then he bent forward enough for his shoulders to reach the extremely long handlebars. Anna gasped as he put his feet on the pedals, set off and, very shakily, rode across the lawn.
Oh my God, he's going to kill himself on that thing.
But to her amazement, he didn't. He didn't even fall. Using his head and shoulders to steer, he bicycled down the street, turned around and came back. Anna stood with both her hands covering her mouth. She had stopped breathing and everything inside of her was frozen.
Valdemar rode the thing all the way back on the grass, before he tipped over and landed with the bike op top of him. Anna stormed to him, thinking she could hear him cry, but as she came c
lose, she realized he was, in fact, laughing. The wondrousness of a child's laughter made everything inside of her come alive again and, while helping him get back up, she started laughing too. Laughing with relief and hope thinking that maybe, just maybe it was going to be all right after all. He was going to be alright. Valdemar was not pitiful, he was one of the strongest children this earth was ever going to see.
"Did you see me, Mom? Did you see it?"
"I did, sweetheart. I saw you. I saw everything. It was amazing. You're amazing, Valdemar. You truly are."
Then they laughed again. Finally Anna took the boy inside and brought out ice cream, Valdemar's favorite, and they ate it talking all afternoon about how amazing it felt for him to be able to move around using a bike. How much freedom it gave him.
"It was almost like flying, Mommy."
The next day, he was practicing his biking while Anna watched with anxious eyes and lots of gasps when, all of a sudden, a car drove down the street and into the driveway. Anna's heart dropped.
It was Michael.
He got out of the car and looked at Valdemar as he rode the bike into the driveway and jumped off with a huge smile.
"Did you see it Daddy? Did you see me?" He asked hopefully.
Anna's heart was pounding awaiting the answer. Not a sound left Michael's lips, so Valdemar tried again.
"I'm riding my new bike, Daddy. Just like an ordinary kid I'm riding a bike, a real bike, aren't you proud?"
Come one Michael. Just say something nice for once. Just look at the boy and talk to him. Just this once, you bastard.
But Michael didn't say anything to Valdemar. Instead he turned his head and faced Anna with the words:
"I'm leaving you."
27
AUGUST 2012
WE CHECKED IN TO Hotel Mercury in Silkeborg around five thirty in the afternoon. We agreed to meet for dinner in the restaurant at six thirty after taking a rest. I sat on the bed with my cellphone in my hand finding the courage to call Peter and let him know what was going on. I had wanted to wait till I was alone, since I didn't want Sune to know if Peter got upset. It was Julie who picked up the phone. My heart was beating. Hearing her voice made me miss her like crazy.
"Hi sweetie. How is everything?"
"Great," she said.
"What are you doing?"
"Playing Mindskill on the iPad."
I smiled. That was all she did lately. Playing Mindskill or watching videos on YouTube of other people playing it. I didn't get it. To me it was just a world of big blocks and it seemed really boring, but all the kids loved it. "Of course you are. What is your father doing?"
"Taking a shower. He’s been painting all day. He said he was going to make pancakes for dinner."
"Oh, did he now?"
"Yeah. He also said you couldn't do anything about it since you weren't here."
I laughed. "Well he is right. I guess it will do for tonight. Your dad makes wonderful pancakes. That's the one thing he can actually make."
"I know. So when are you coming back? Dad said, since you weren't here yet, you probably wouldn’t make it for dinner."
"He's right. I have to stay the night. Will you be alright alone?" I asked.
"I'm not alone. Dad's here, remember?" She said.
"Of course. Just making sure you don't miss me too much."
"You have high thoughts about yourself, Mommy. Of course I miss you, but I'll see you tomorrow right?"
"Yes, baby. I'm doing a late interview here tonight, then I'll sleep and go right back to Brabrand tomorrow morning."
"Is Sune with you?" She asked.
I paused. "Yes. Yes he is. We're working together."
"What about Tobias?"
"He's at home with a nanny," I answered. "Sune will go home to be with him tomorrow morning."
"Oh okay." Her voice sounded disappointed. I wondered if she had thought I would bring Sune and Tobias with me back to the island. "Here is daddy."
"Hi there." Peter sounded happy.
"Hi. Listen. They want me to stay the night. I have an interview late tonight. I'll be back tomorrow instead."
Peter went quiet. A million thoughts ran through my mind while trying to figure out what he was thinking and feeling. "Okay," he said. "I had a feeling that it was going to be late since we hadn't heard from you and you hadn't come back yet. But I hadn't expected you to stay away all night. I guess I'll have to live with it, then."
"It's just that they have landed an interview with the kidney-guy and he is only going to be around for tonight. Tomorrow he is going back to Roskilde."
"Well you do what you gotta do. We'll be here waiting for you." Peter sighed and paused. "Say, is Sune staying at the hotel with you?"
I closed my eyes. "Yes." I exhaled and rubbed my forehead. "He is staying in another room."
"Well I sure hope he is," Peter said. "Why wouldn't he be?"
"No. That's not what I meant …"
"No, I know what you meant. You think I'm jealous, don't you?" Peter sounded offended, all of a sudden.
"Well … I guess."
"Do I have any reason to be jealous?" He asked.
I froze. I wanted so badly to tell him he didn't, but I knew it would be a lie. Seeing Sune again had awoken a lot of emotions in me that I didn't want him to know about. Feelings that I hardly wanted to admit to myself that I had.
"No. No. Of course not. I'll see you tomorrow."
"See you then."
28
AUGUST 2012
"SO HOW ARE JULIE and your dad?"
Sune looked at me after we had ordered and the waiter had left. I felt like I was already cheating on Peter just by sitting in the hotel restaurant with Sune.
I smiled. "They're both fine. Well that's not completely true. Julie is great. My dad's health is still not too good. He's had a lot of infections and problems with his bladder lately. I keep hoping it'll get better, and some days he's doing really great, but then a new infection comes along that he has trouble beating and we're back to where we started. He had a bladder infection just last week that …" I paused and looked up at Sune. "I'm sharing a little too much here. You don't want to hear those details."
Sune raised his hand to stop me. "No, I do. I love your dad, you know that. I don't mind hearing details."
"Okay. Well it's not something we should talk about at the dinner table, but he is fighting, and hopefully winning, but it is getting harder for him to do simple things, like walking on his own, getting out of the house and so on. I have my sister looking out for him while we're gone, but I don't know if … I mean, she has small kids and a fulltime job and all …"
"I can check in on him when I get back to Karrebaeksminde if you'd like."
I look at him and our eyes locked. "Would you do that? It would be a great help for me. I am so concerned constantly."
Sune smiled. The waiter brought our food. "Of course, Rebekka. I'd do anything for you."
I sipped my wine, feeling my heart racing. I had no idea what to say to that, so I started eating instead. The duck was terrible. I took one bite, then looked at Sune who had picked the same as me. I chewed and chewed, but it was so hard to chew I wondered if I would ever be able to swallow it. Sune looked like he had the same troubles. Then I laughed. Sune chuckled and finally swallowed. I did the same, before we both flushed it down with the red wine.
"How can anyone ruin duck?" I whispered and leaned over the table.
Sune laughed. "I don't know. You'd have to be pretty good, I guess."
I chuckled and pushed the meat aside, then tried the potatoes. They weren't as bad as the meat, but they weren't good either.
"Wow. I never thought I would ever taste anything worse than the food I had in juvenile prison," Sune said.
I burst into laughter. I looked at his hand missing the two fingers that he had lost in prison when he was doing time for hacking as a teenager. I had heard all his stories from the inside and knew all about how tough it had been on him. I
n a very few years, I had gotten to know him better than I knew my own husband, who never told me anything from his past. I had to always drag it out of him. Sune wasn't like that. Sune could talk about his emotions, about stuff he had gone through. Peter couldn't. Peter had grown up in an environment where you weren't allowed to discuss your feelings. Where it was considered as a weakness. That much he had told me, but that was about it. I never met his parents since they lived in Singapore now, where his father had his business. I had met his brother on one occasion, but only briefly when he was in Aarhus many years ago. I felt like Peter didn't want me to know his family and, in the beginning of my marriage, it annoyed me and made me feel like he was embarrassed by me, but after some time, I realized that it had nothing to do with me. It wasn't me he was embarrassed by; it was his family.
Sune had become silent. He was looking at me with serious eyes. I sensed he was going to say something. My heart was beating fast and I felt my cheeks blush. I thought like crazy about something to say to break the silence.
"So how is Tobias?" I asked.
"Good. He misses Julie, though."
I nodded and drank. "I know. Julie misses him too. She was just asking for him on the phone when I was in my room. She thought he was with you here."
"That's sweet."
Sune exhaled. "Rebekka … I …" He grabbed my hand.
I shook my head and pulled my hand away. "Don't Sune. Don't do this."
Sune pulled back and bit his lip. "Okay. I get it. I'm gonna leave it there. This is the way you want it. I get it."
A new silence broke out between us. A waiter approached us. He looked at me. "Mrs. Franck?"
"Yes?"
"Mr. Fenger is waiting for you in the bar."
I looked at my watch. "He’s early," I said.
29
AUGUST 2012
SHE WAS PRETTIER THAN he thought she would be. Henrik Fenger didn't exactly know what he had expected, but not this. He watched her from afar, in the mirror behind the bartender, as she walked out from the restaurant and towards him in the bar. Her searching eyes scanning the area to find him gave her away. Behind her followed a younger guy, very tall and who looked more like a punker than a photographer.