West of Nowhere

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West of Nowhere Page 19

by KG MacGregor


  Chapter Twenty

  Sweat poured off Shep’s brow as he turned his chair on the concrete driveway between the carport and the deck. “How many is that?”

  “Nine down, six more to go.” Amber watched his endeavor with admiration. Only three days after getting clearance to start wheeling himself, he was up to fifteen laps, with a goal of adding five more every day. “What is it about thirty-three laps that makes it your magic number?”

  “The parade route’s a half-mile long,” he answered, huffing. “I’ve been carrying one end of the banner for American Legion Post Number Nine for the last twenty-one years. No way am I going to let Brady Hawes take my spot. His chair’s electric, for Christ’s sake.”

  That stubborn pride ran in the Shepard family, Amber noted. Joy had freaked out when she’d found her dress pants too tight, enough to tack on an hour to the end of every day so she could stop at the gym. Apparently, this Veterans Day Parade was a big deal in Alameda.

  As Shep approached her for the turn, she held out a handful of Goobers and dropped them into his open mouth. “Too bad I can’t run along beside you in the parade. You’d do anything for Goobers. I noticed Madison likes these too. I had to hide them in the vegetable bin. No chance of her finding them in there.”

  “She’s a pistol, that one,” he wheezed. “Never saw a kid adapt so fast to being in a new place.”

  Of course she’d adapted, Amber thought. Who wouldn’t with that kind of red carpet treatment?

  Shep paused to catch his breath. “It must have been tough on her with that worthless mother of hers…probably talks to her more now on the computer than she did when they lived together. And that sorry excuse for a boyfriend…how did the navy end up with a cad like that? He’s just the sort of asshat who’ll put himself first on a ship when he gets in a jam.”

  Amber leaned against the ramp to the deck, cupping her hand to light a cigarette. Seconds later, she savored the heady rush of nicotine hitting her bloodstream.

  Shep turned at the carport and started toward her. “Hey, I just realized that’s the first time I’ve seen you light up today.”

  She’d been trying to quit, but hadn’t told anyone in case she failed. “That’s because I’ve cut back. I’m down to only five a day, but these cravings are driving me up a wall. I might have to postpone this till I get finished with all my school stuff. It makes it hard to concentrate.”

  “That’s nuts! You’ve already got the hardest part of quitting behind you. Why the hell would you want to go through it again?”

  “Because that’s bullshit. The hardest part is when you get to zero.” She took another deep drag and blew it away from him as he approached. “I’m still trying to figure Madison out. I can’t tell if she likes me or not.”

  “She probably doesn’t, but it’s not personal.”

  “She told you that?” Amber asked anxiously.

  “Nope.” He wiped his face with a towel before spinning and starting back toward the carport. “You upset the order of things. That kid loves me to pieces, but I practically fall off the face of the earth when Joy walks through the door. That’s what you’re up against.”

  “I know, and that’s why I get the hell out of the way. I don’t even show my face until it’s time for dinner. Then I clean up the kitchen and go hide in the camper until she goes to bed. What more can I do?”

  “Could be that’s part of the problem. You need to let Madison know you belong here too. Stick around and watch some TV with us after dinner, or maybe we could all play a card game. Don’t let her shove you out of the picture. The best way to show her you aren’t a threat is to hang out with us.”

  “Pfft! I don’t see what that’s going to accomplish. Every time I come around, she latches onto Joy like a magnet.”

  “Yeah, but you’ve got to give Joy a chance to tell Madison what she wants. It’s her job to balance all the parts.”

  “Joy doesn’t need that kind of stress at the end of the day.”

  “Horse hockey. Joy handles stress just fine. Besides, how else is the kid…going to learn that you being here is okay?” he said, huffing as he spun his wheels forward. “Joy has to show her…and she has to set down some rules about how to behave. She can’t…teach her anything about you if you’re out here in the camper with your head up your ass.”

  Shep sure had a way with words. Fortunately, it was a way Amber understood. “Fine, I’ll hang out tonight and see what happens.” She smoked the last of her cigarette—all the way to the filter—and dropped it into an empty soda can on the deck.

  “That’s fifteen laps,” he said, gathering his strength for one final burst up the ramp. “Madison won’t make it easy…but stick with it and she’ll come around. You get through this and…giving up them coffin nails will be a piece of cake.”

  Amber answered a cell phone call from Joy and told her, “Your pop’s been doing laps around the backyard. You working that hard at the gym?”

  “I haven’t even broken a sweat yet. That’s why I’m calling. I got hung up after work talking to one of the other crew chiefs, and now I’m running a little late. Can you go meet Madison?”

  Amber rolled her eyes at no one in particular and checked her watch—plenty of time to get to the school before the final bell, but Madison wouldn’t be happy about it. “Sure. Shep and Barbara want to order a pizza from Bowzer’s, so we don’t have to worry about cooking dinner. Take your time.”

  “Thanks. Oh, and I’ve been letting Madison walk the first couple of blocks by herself. I wait for her at the corner of Lincoln and Versailles, right there by the fire hydrant.”

  “I know where that is.” It was one of Skippy’s regular stops in the morning. “See you back here a little later.”

  With Shep growing more independent every day, Amber didn’t have to worry about leaving him to shower on his own. Her bigger concern was over what would happen in a couple of weeks when he got released from therapy altogether. She should have her GED results by then, and if she passed, she’d have a few more options on the job front. None of them paid as well as this one, but even a few hundred dollars a week would be enough to get her by while she looked into getting the right kind of job training.

  Working with Shep on his exercises had been both fun and interesting. Seeing his progress every day made her a believer in physical therapy, so much that she’d looked into what it would take to become certified as a physical therapy assistant—two years of college. But the average salary in Oakland was over $50,000, and more important, there were lots of job openings. A part-time job on top of school would make those two years fly, as long as Joy agreed it was worth the investment. She didn’t want to take advantage of her home situation—like she always had in the past.

  Getting out of the Shepards’ house all day for work and school had lots of advantages. Mainly, it took her out of the running for Madison’s babysitter-in-chief, a job she’d never wanted in the first place. For generous room and board, however, she owed it to Joy and Shep to lend a helping hand where she could.

  Skippy tugged her to the fire hydrant and commenced his routine of sniffing, sprinkling and sniffing some more. In the distance, children began to appear from the school. For a moment, she thought she’d glimpsed Madison, who was wearing her bright pink pants again with a white shirt and blue backpack. She waved, but as the children drew closer, there was no sign of the gangly girl in pigtails.

  For more than fifteen minutes, Amber waited, growing ever more impatient until the last cluster of schoolchildren walked past. Then she tugged Skippy’s leash toward the school, her eyes scouring every direction for a group of girls playing in a driveway or on a porch. Only a handful of stragglers remained in the schoolyard, none of them Madison.

  Panic set in and she anxiously called Shep.

  “Two minutes earlier and you’d have caught me in my skivvies.”

  “Have you seen Madison?”

  “She’s not with you?”

  “She never walked by
the meeting spot. I got here before any of the kids did, corner of Lincoln and Versailles, just like Joy said. I thought I saw her in the distance but when the kids came by, whoever it was disappeared.”

  “You don’t think she got in a car with somebody?” He sounded as fretful as she. “Hang on a sec. I think I hear Joy pulling in.”

  Amber waited a few more frantic moments before Joy came to the phone.

  “What do you mean you never saw her? Didn’t you go where I told you to?”

  “Of course I did! She never showed up.” She explained once again about the girl she saw in the distance. “But then she mingled in with the other kids and when they walked by, she wasn’t with them.”

  “She didn’t just disappear into thin air. I’ll drive through the neighborhood. You go back to the corner and wait.”

  Amber cringed at the agitation in Joy’s voice, but this wasn’t about either of them. A nine-year-old was missing and they had only a couple of hours of daylight to find her.

  * * *

  Before Joy even made it to the end of Garfield, she spotted a small figure trudging along the sidewalk toward the house. A closer look confirmed it was Madison, and she heaved an enormous sigh of relief. She drew her Jeep even and tooted the horn while simultaneously calling her father to report everything was okay.

  “Where have you been?” she demanded, still more worried than cross.

  “I had to walk home all by myself. Why didn’t you come meet me?”

  “I was at the gym and I asked Amber to wait for you at the corner. Didn’t you see her?”

  “She wasn’t there. I stood there for a few minutes, but then I got scared of being by myself so I walked home.”

  The house was less than half a block away. “I’m sorry, honey. Amber must have gone to the wrong place. Go on home and start your homework. I have to go pick her up.”

  “I’ll go with you,” Madison said eagerly, and started to climb into the passenger seat.

  “No, I want you home. Grandpa Shep was worried, and I need to figure out how this happened.”

  “I was right there waiting and she never came. She must have gone to the wrong place, like you said.”

  Joy was almost disappointed to find Amber at the fire hydrant. Had she been at the wrong corner, it would have explained how the two of them had missed each other.

  “Madison’s at home.”

  Amber got in and patted her chest as if to slow her heart rate.

  “She said you weren’t here and she got scared and walked home by herself.”

  “That’s crazy. I would have passed her on the sidewalk. I’m telling you, I was right here but she never came by.”

  “That doesn’t make any sense.” Madison had been playing fast and loose with the truth lately, but Joy had a hard time believing she could have found her way home on another street. “Did you walk up to Versailles a different way? Northwood, maybe?”

  “No, I came straight up Lincoln like we always do. The only time I ever went down Northwood was in the car with you.”

  Maybe Madison had just gotten confused about where she was going. On the other hand, perhaps Amber had dawdled for a smoke, or turned her back to chat with someone.

  “I’ve been thinking about letting Madison walk to school and back by herself,” Joy said. “Some of the other kids on our street do it, but after what happened today, I’m pretty sure she’s not ready for that.”

  “I agree. She scares me half to death sometimes when she runs up ahead of Skippy and me. I’m worried she’ll try to cross the street where there isn’t a crossing guard. Traffic’s pretty busy in the morning with all the people driving up to the school.”

  “You let her run up ahead?”

  “I don’t let her,” Amber snapped. “She does whatever she wants, and if I say anything to her, it only makes it worse. About the only way I can get her to listen to me is by threatening to tell you she’s misbehaving. Makes me feel like a third-grade tattletale.”

  “So why haven’t you told me any of this? Did you stop to think I might have been able to straighten her out? She’s a smart kid and I can get her to listen to reason. You can’t keep these things from me, Amber.”

  By her jutting chin and crossed arms, Amber was fuming inside. She probably had a whole string of curses and rants she was dying to let fly, but in the last few weeks she’d learned to control her explosive temper. No doubt she felt powerless because of her situation, and while Joy hated lording that sort of authority over her, the issue of Madison’s safety wasn’t negotiable.

  She pulled into the carport and turned off the engine. “Amber, look…I’m not mad. I just got really scared when we didn’t know where she was. If something happened to that kid…God, it would kill me.”

  Amber stewed a few more seconds before flinging open her door. “Just so you know, I was scared too. Enjoy your dinner. I’ve got stuff to do in the camper.”

  A temper tantrum. How nice.

  * * *

  Distracted by the growling in her stomach, Amber tried to make sense of the California Driver’s Handbook. Her Tennessee license was good for two more years, but most potential employers would probably want proof she was a resident of the state.

  Still smarting from her confrontation with Joy, she tried to figure out how she’d screwed things up. Joy was right that Madison probably couldn’t have found her way home on another street. Maybe her watch had been wrong, or she’d been so wrapped up in her thoughts that she missed seeing Madison pass her on the other side of the street.

  Whatever had happened, one thing was abundantly clear: She wasn’t responsible enough to be left in charge of someone’s kid, and if Joy hadn’t known that before she certainly knew it now.

  The back door banged at eight o’clock, a half hour before Joy’s usual bedtime. She entered the camper with a slice of pizza on a paper plate. “I sent Madison to bed a little early tonight. Thought you might be getting hungry.”

  The aroma of pepperoni and onions reached Amber’s brain immediately, causing her mouth to water. It was all she could do not to snatch it off the plate and swallow it whole. “Thanks, I could use a pick-me-up. I can’t believe how many traffic rules you guys have. Am I going to have to know it’s a hundred-dollar fine to smoke with a kid in the car? Can’t I just promise not to do it?”

  “To the first question, yes. To the second, I don’t think that will help you on the test.”

  Joy slid in beside her at the dinette and draped an arm around her shoulder as she ate. “I talked to Madison about listening better and doing what she’s told.”

  Amber had hoped they’d all just drop the whole subject and go on about their business. “Great, now she knows I ratted her out. She’ll probably hate me even more.”

  “She doesn’t hate you. Jealous, yes. But I think that’s normal for a kid who’s been through what she had to put up with from Syd. She knows I’m crazy about you, and that jealous streak ought to pass when she realizes it won’t have any effect on how I feel about her. Besides, I didn’t say anything about what you told me. When I saw her on the sidewalk this afternoon, I told her to go straight to the house and start her homework, and instead she came home and got Pop to play a game with her. It was the wrong day to disobey and I let her know it.”

  Amber wasn’t proud of her feelings at the moment, but she was glad to hear that Madison didn’t totally walk on water. Maybe getting yanked down to earth by someone she idolized would do the trick. It certainly had for Amber.

  “I’m sorry about what happened today, Joy…”

  “It all turned out okay and that’s what matters.” She pushed Amber’s hair back and nuzzled her neck. “Actually, that’s not all that matters. You matter, and I should be the one apologizing for today. I was scared and I overreacted.”

  Amber had rarely been on this end of an apology. In the three years she’d spent with Corey, the word “sorry” had never left his lips. Same with her parents, and not a single crazy boss she’d ever w
orked for had apologized for their bullshit. She frankly wasn’t used to having someone else accept blame, and Joy’s sweet words nearly made her cry.

  She allowed herself to relax in Joy’s embrace, sorry she had wasted the night alone in the camper when she could have taken Shep’s advice and joined the family. “I understand, honey. It was terrifying. You totally get a pass for that. I’m sorry I was a jerk about dinner.”

  “It’s okay. There was more pizza for us.”

  Amber managed only a weak chuckle. Smoothing over the day’s events fixed only a few of the symptoms, not the underlying cause. “I’m worried about things between me and Madison. How am I going to live here with you if I can’t get her to accept me?”

  “You’re borrowing trouble, sweetheart. She’s always been the center of attention in this house, so it’s going to take a little time for her to get used to having someone else around. But she will, especially when she sees how much I love you. I think we just need to start doing more activities together.”

  “That’s what your pop said.”

  “He’s right. You’ve got a break from classes right now. Come hang out with us.”

  Amber nodded gamely.

  “And by the way, I was saving this for a surprise, but…” She produced three tickets. “Gus Holley, next Saturday. Tenth row.”

  “Oh, my gosh!” She hugged Joy’s neck. The tenth row probably wasn’t close enough for Corey to see a Fuck You sign, but she didn’t care about Corey anymore. What she had with Joy erased all the crap she’d ever had to deal with.

  “Look, I know you didn’t bargain for any of these headaches with Madison, and I’m sure it’s crossed your mind to run for your life while you still can. I wouldn’t blame you if you did, but I hope you’ll give it some time. And don’t be afraid to talk with me about how you’re feeling. You’re not the only one who’s new at this.”

  “Okay.” At least it put to rest her fear that Joy would realize this wasn’t going to work and throw in the towel. With her declaration that she wanted Amber to stick it out—and tickets to Gus Holley—the day couldn’t have ended much better. Unless…“I don’t suppose there’s more pizza.”

 

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