by Roxanne Lee
We ate quietly for a moment until Duncan broke the silence, "When you want to start Ceann?"
I looked over my shoulder for a moment before I realised Duncan was talking to Carver. Sam whispered in my ear, "Means boss, girlie."
My cheeks tinged slightly pink and I nodded at him, hoping no one else had caught my ignorance. I returned to the conversation Carver was having which sounded suspiciously like it involved me.
"This afternoon? I have nothing pressing today, I'd like to start as soon as possible."
Duncan grinned a little,"Sure thing, we'll make sure the young lass enjoy herself."
I stared at Carver until he deigned to include me in the conversation. He touched the back of my hand lightly and that rough voice contributed to the tiny shivers on my skin. "Thought it might be a good idea to get you in training. Maybe see if we can't get you a little more control over your wolf. These three are my most trusted."
I clenched my jaw and raised an eyebrow at Carver then leaned in towards him so I could whisper in his ear,"I don't understand how I'm going to do that. If she comes out when they touch me I'll kill them."
Carvers fists turned white but his voice was calm in response, "they've learned well enough how to take a beating and stay alive cherry, I trust them with you and I trust you with their lives."
Personally I thought he was insane. I don't trust me. I sighed and looked at Duncan’s weirdly cheerful grin. Charlie nodded frantically at me while scoping the room out again. It was Lane however that forced my hand. His evil little smirk and the savage glint in his eye instantly challenged my wolf. It brought a corresponding reaction from me, a truly devilish smile that was half human, half animal. My wolf rumbled within, thumping her heavy tail on my spine, compelling my agreement.
I met Lane's stare and cocked my head at his challenge. "Alright then, let's start with you."
Chapter 19.
The training room was rather disappointing. The one I had seen at twelve years old had been five star compared to this one. It was old and worn, used and lived in. The bags hanging from thick beams in the ceiling were monstrous exaggerations of normal boxing bags. Split and pouring stuffing from its seams, they were suspended in their last moments of life. The mats that covered the floor were stained in dark blotches of brown, the padding absorbing what a guard had spilt. Rips in the blue foam, claw shaped in their evenly spaced marks, showed a map of man to wolf.
There were four other guards in the room as we walked in, quiet in their concentration, focused in their own little corner of the world. I felt an urge to whisper as if I were intruding in their territory. Sam had followed me in while Carver waited outside for my three new trainers. We'd left the dogs in the house, I wasn't sure if they'd feel the need to protect, and I didn't want them hurt by accident.
I sat on a bench that ran the perimeter of the centre mats. I closed my eyes and tried focusing on that dark force inside me, poking the beast, judging her reactions. She remained still, lazy and relaxed in a half sleep. I let out a breath and left her alone for the moment, I felt idiotic trying to predict her reactions, I already knew this situation was not going to end well for everyone involved.
"Dun look so glum girlie, if nuthin' else it'll be amusin'."
I rolled my eyes, "Seriously Sam? That's the only thing you have to say right now?"
He grinned his carefree grin and sat down beside me, "They big boys, you think they can' handle one tiny girl?"
I huffed at him being purposely dense, "Yes well I'm sure that's what the Alpha thought too."
Sam bellowed out laughter and I winced at the startled guards broken from their fierce concentration and dropping weights to the floor."Yeah sure he did. But then again he was an ass..."
I looked at him and frowned while he finished his laughter."... Look girlie, he weren' a smart man. Thought he didn' need ta be careful wit' ya, thought he was tha be all n' end all of werewolves." Sam snorted at the thought, "You showed him he was wrong. These men, they smarter then tha', they ain't goin' ta take an eye off ya for a second. B'sides everyone already know ya crazy; ya killed an Alpha, watcha worryin' 'bout?"
I narrowed my eyes at him and gave up. Maybe he had a small point though, Duncan and Charlie certainly seemed smart enough. Lane slightly less so, regardless they were all guards for a reason, surely they could keep themselves alive long enough to calm my wolf down if she appeared.
Carver entered followed by all three guards. They looked particularly intimidating this afternoon, as if they'd gone away and added more muscle just to return like a walking judgement. As soon as my stomach quivered at the sight of them I felt my wolf take notice. A small stretch of my skin, a sliding under the surface of my arms as she poured her claws to my fingertips, a little rumble in my chest to announce her arrival.
I put my chains on as tight as I could, locking her down, tying her up. Those laughable steel links that could have been made from daisy's for all the good they did.
Carver's dark eyes flicked to mine as he stood in front of me, checking on my welfare, glimmering over my body as if analysing if I was still in the same condition that he'd left me in. I felt oddly warmed by his obsessive compulsions over my well being, it was nice for a change to have someone else do it for me.
Duncan, Charlie and Lane had stayed in the middle of the mats, leaving their shoes at the edge. Carver held out a hand and I stared at it for a long time before placing my palm on his. A light tug and I was on my feet, with remarkably no resistance from my wolf, she was too focused on the men waiting for her to worry about where I put my hand.
I turned to Sam and found him still grinning, settling back against the bench and getting comfortable as if anticipating a show. I glared, not that it did much, and walked away with Carver.
"You're going to be watching?"
His voice was back to husky, a truly thrilling sound for my evolved sense. "Yes, I'll be sitting with Sam."
I looked at him out of the corner of my eye,"What about your wolf?"
Carver brought us to a halt and turned to me, "We had a little chat, he understands this is to help you. Not to say he won't get pissed but he'll stay inside for now."
That was surprising,"Your wolf talks to you?"
He smiled at me, that sultry smile that made him so much more. "More emotions and mutual understanding then talking but Yeah, he does. Yours doesn't?"
I snorted, "More like ignores me."
He tugged me along and started towards the guards again,"well hopefully this will give you two some cohesion."
Maybe, maybe not. I'd be happy if everyone got out alive.
I had tried to avoid Lane's eyes while he'd been in the training room seeing as he antagonised my wolf so much, but the closer I got to him the more that beast inside forced my eyes to his. By the time I stood in front of the little line they'd made of themselves I was glaring at the blonde wolf. Duncan’s laugh was loud and gruff as he clapped Lane on the back.
"At least we know what angers her beastie, that would be you brathair."
Lane grunted and met my gaze. His eyes were a stark grey that pierced through my nerves and reached the gold glinting off my wolf's vision. He was either incredibly confident in his abilities or incredibly stupid.
Carver squeezed my hand lightly before letting go and brushing a tiny kiss to the side of my head. He was gone so quickly and I was so focused on Lane I had no time to react and ended up staring after him in confusion. Duncan’s little laugh caught my attention and I turned back to his amusement. "Happens ta the best of us."
His words just made me frown more. Charlie moved forward a step and entranced me in that voice of his,"We're going to start with Lane as he's already caught your wolf's attention. I'll stay on the mat with you and hold back your wolf if you lose control."
I rolled my eyes, "We should just go with when I lose control."
He smiled a little and again I became enchanted. God help the mate he gets.
His eyes moved quickly to Carver a
nd back again before signalling Duncan to move off the mat. I saw him flick his eyes to doors, the windows on the far wall and the guards still training in one corner. He was a complete contradiction of movement and mood. That wave of serene still exuding from a package of frenzy.
In the moment my concentration was taken over by Charlie, a flash of black swept across my vision. I felt weightless for several seconds before crashing to the ground, an 'oomph' escaping with my breath. I lay still for a minute before my senses returned. I looked up at the blonde man smirking above me, a rumble filled the room from the benches at the far wall. I heard Charlie's voice to the side of me but his words didn't register and his tone no longer drew my attention.
A thrashing became distracting under my skin, teeth gnawing at my ribs and eyes flickering from human to golden hues. Lane's smirk became wider and his voice was quiet and stilted as if he didn't use it very often, "don't think you can beat...me do you girl? You trying to keep her...in right now? Don't. Let her out, I could do with a little...workout before I'm finished with you."
I could not understand what he thought he was doing. My wolf disliked the slight against her strength, she truly believed she was indestructible. I may not completely agree with her but this man was pushing my control until I was hovering on a line between angry and unhinged.
"you not getting up little girl?...Giving up already?"
That line disintegrated to dust, along with any semblance of containing my wolf. She burst through my flesh amid a roar of fury, shouts in soothing tones failed to affect the animal in my place and rough, husky growls fell on deaf ears. She wasted no time in leaping at the blonde man, her claws extended to knives and her jaw open in an intention of murder.
For once I was not behind a glass wall, seeing and hearing yet unable to contribute. I shared a space with an animal, both of us with only the objective of killing the man who taunted us. My claws raked down his side, his wolf had come to the fore while I'd shifted, his torso larger and thicker skinned but still not able to withstand the sharpness of those diamond hard talons.
Blood dripped down his leathery skin, his shirt destroyed in his shift. Four long ragged stripes ran down his side, my wolf leaving her mark, playing with her prey.
I heard a scramble behind me but I couldn't remove my gaze from the redness leaking from him, my beast wanted more and she refocused on another part of him, a part that she became obsessed with sinking her teeth into.
She roared again and leapt for his neck, ignoring the large hands he lifted to stop her, the claws that dug into her side as she pierced his shoulder with inches long teeth. He'd yanked his head to the right and her aim was disturbed, she found consolation however in the blood that poured into her mouth.
I felt arms wind around my furred body, steel encased in skin, a locking embrace that was near impossible to remove. My wolf removed her teeth from Lanes shoulder and swung her head around to bite at the man attached to her back. A shock of brown hair obscured his face as he twisted out of her reach and threw his legs around her bottom half, legs as strong as iron bars grappled with her own until she was writhing in restraints of limbs.
A red haired brute fell on top of the other, both pinning me down to the floor as Lane was removed from the room, his blood leaving a trail to follow. Carver appeared in front of my subdued wolf, his face tense and sharply defined, a growl loosing itself every now and then at the men on top of me.
"Shift."
His voice was forceful and commanding, centuries of power and authority contained within, and yet my wolf only stilled and met his black eyes.
"Shift cherry please, you won't be released until you do." This was softer and more pleading and allowed my consciousness to regain full control over the animal. I started to regress to human and stared at Carver until he understood the need for clothes.
A long shirt was thrown over me as my size fell from monstrous to girl once again. I used shaky hands to fumble with buttons and breathed deeply until I could stand to look up at Carver's face. I imagined disappointment and accusation, I had completely destroyed that trust he'd so easily but foolishly given.
Carvers rumble of displeasure only made me tense more in mortification. "Look at me Arya."
I raised my eyes slowly, procrastinating over that reproof I was sure to find. Instead I found a sultry smile that instantly changed my guilt to bemusement."We knew that would happen cherry, he was trying to get you to change. We just needed to know how little it took to set you off."
I narrowed my eyes at him, I really disliked surprises.
He raised his eyebrows at me, "What? I thought you showed great control."
I was less than amused.
Chapter 20.
I've had few moments of pure bliss in my life, but sitting on the edge of that mat, watching Charlie and Carver pound each other into the Blue padding was weirdly satisfying. While we waited for Lane to return from the doctor, they had decided to show me simple defensive moves which had quickly gotten out of hand and turned less teaching and more competitive. It seemed no matter how old a man got, that instinct never died.
Sam was sat beside me, having moved from the benches to be closer to the action, his rolling guffaws were a soundtrack to the grunts coming from the mat as each hit stuck home. I couldn't say that it filled me with confidence that the very same men who were trying to give me control over my wolf couldn't seem to control themselves, but I couldn't deny the relaxation watching two men hurt each other gave me. I suppose it was something to do with relief, the idea that I wasn't completely abnormal. That the ruined part of me didn't dictate all my actions, that maybe a little was just plain instinct.
As the Captain and his second flew into a blistering round of trading punch for punch the oak doors opened to two familiar blondes. Lane was still bare chested from his earlier shift and the claw marks down his side and bite in his shoulder were a pleasing sight. Although healing well and quickly, the marks were visible enough so that my wolf sat up and preened in absolute gratification, the relish she felt from seeing proof of her attack was both amusing to me and slightly worrying due to its manic edge.
He looked at me as he strolled onto the mat, I was expecting anger, some more of that savage retribution he seemed to portray so well, but not the bright smile I actually got. He nodded at me and turned to watch the fight still escalating between Carver and Charlie. He was completely unaffected by my presence, no lingering animosity and no promise of reckoning. I was perplexed, as was my wolf. She had been stilled of movement by a man once so aggressive and challenging, turned casual in his return.
Lane was a complex wolf, one that obviously had a lot of experience in pushing those buttons.
The other blonde though, quickly took my wolf's attention. Hair in disarray down to his shoulders and what seemed to have turned into a permanent scowl on his face, he sauntered in after Lane and stood at the perimeter, alternatively watching the fight and flicking bitter laden eyes my way. It was a bad idea to antagonise a wild animal only just finished with her last challenge.
I would never get bored of the searing heat that preceded a shift. It was at once a welcome pain and glorious awakening, it was coming alive after endless Siberian winters of hibernation. When the animal takes over, all human insecurities, beliefs and morals become secondary to impulses and intuition. Not that my ethics were particularly well rounded as human anyway, but the hesitation I might have experienced in a room containing several guards and their Captain, was long gone. The doubt about whether this man, a new Alpha who so far had only expressed his dislike towards me did in fact deserve to die, departed along with my human skin.
Only Sam’s deep voice stilled my imminent surge. Whatever magic that old man had managed to break through the haze of blood-lust and deafened ears. The moment Alex had caught my eye, the lost kill that had been Lane refocused and centred on him. An Alpha that in my wolf's view, was no different to the pathetic excuse the last one had been.
"Ya jus' got d
ressed girlie, Ya couldn' even pretend ta be normal?"
My wolf swung her massive head to glare at Sam, seems even as an animal she understood his lack of wit.
He chuckled at her expression, I'm sure it was amusing coming from a four hundred pound wolf. "Doncha pull tha' face at me, we had this talk already, ya were 'spose ta stop tryin' ta Kill people."
A little rumble came from her chest as if she were disappointed that she'd been caught. From my back-seat position inside her head I looked towards Carver and saw him standing in the middle of the mat with Charlie, a two man block between myself and Alex. Carver's chest was bare and sweat slicked, it was a particularly good distraction technique. The cinnamon scent rolling off his skin in heated waves was a maddening draw for the wolf's over sensitive nose. She flicked her tail at him, an expression of interest that I never thought I'd see. Carver took a step forward and his beast rumbled low, it was a vibration I felt in my stomach and it echoed through my body until it ended in hair follicles that stood to attention for the powerful male slowly stalking, gradually changing from man to beast with each forward step.
His distraction may have worked, if my wolf wasn't as fractured as I was. Her interest in him was purely curiosity – he caused odd responses in her that she didn't understand, the most irregular, being that she had no compulsion to kill him. Injure him yes, but not kill.
She allowed him to move closer, she allowed Sam to move away and take up Carver's previous position between her and Alex and she allowed a touch on her fur as Carver's wolf bent to smell her neck. But she did not take her eyes off Alex as he moved to the side of Sam’s back and bared his teeth.
"Control your bitch Captain, she obviously needs a leash." His low growl was a glaring mistake in the silence that had descended on the training room.
Fire lit my wolf's eyes as I saw men in hues of golden red and saliva doused the flames the thought of his blood produced in my mouth. A maniacal glee filled the animals brain as all rational thought expired and all that remained was extermination.