“Mom, I need to go to school,’’ I tell her walking towards the door, but her hand lashes out grabbing me by the wrist and twisting. I bite my lip sharply to stop myself from crying out in pain and when I taste blood I start to panic more.
“Get rid of him. You ent going,’’ she snaps, her eyes warning me not to push her.
I nod my head, but the hold on my wrist only gets tighter. “Okay, please, stop,’’ I cry, my wrist throbbing. It’s the first time I’ve begged her to stop in a long time. I just hope whatever she has planned is not going to be bad, but then I turn to the door and a risky plan falls into my mind. She’ll never hurt me in front of someone. She wouldn’t want anyone finding out about what she does. So with that in my mind I open the door to a smiling Myles.
“Hey, I’ve been the one waiting for you, come on,’’ I grin, hoping it looks genuine and he can’t see the pain behind my words. He looks at me and smiles until he frowns looking behind me to the door. I grab his arm quickly, not wanting her to think of something that has me staying. “See ya Mom,’’ I shout, my body shaking as I carry on dragging Myles down the path and onto the road.
“You okay?’’ he asks when we’re a good distance away from my house.
“What? Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?’’ I ask defensively, but deep down I’m shitting myself about the consequences of running out on her like that. I should have just stayed there and toughed it out, but I’m tired. I’m tired of being her punching bag, of the person she torments, yells at and hits. I just wish she could be like all the other moms, gentle, kind and loving. She’s never been those things towards me.
“You just seem a little shaken and pale. Are you sure everything is okay? Was it something your mom said?’’
“What do you mean what she said?’’ I ask quickly, worried he heard us through the door.
“Nothing, your mom was there, it didn’t seem like your dad had come home at all since last night, so she can be the only person who has you tied up in knots like this.’’
“Oh, no. Sorry. I guess I’m just tired and I didn’t want to explain where dad was,’’ I grumble, hating that I have to lie to him.
“Why, where is he?’’ he asks intrigued.
“He probably stayed the night with his new girlfriend, Katie. He’s been seeing her for a while now, but he didn’t want to tell me until it was serious. I’m meeting her next weekend.’’
“Oh, I know who she is. She’s a really nice lady. She volunteers for a lot of things around town. I can see why you wouldn’t want your mom to know about her, she’d get jealous, if I know your mom as well as I think I do.’’
His words have me pausing and I want to snap at him that no one knows who she really is apart from me. I’m the one she torments, hurts, beats, and hates. It’s only when I look into his deep brown eyes that I stop myself and instead I smile and nod my head agreeing.
“So, um, I was wondering if you wanted to have another movie night Thursday. I can get Maverick to pick us up from yours. They’ve decided to borrow one of the people carriers from one of the volunteers at the local church, so we’ll all be riding together. Joan told us about it and said the owner wouldn’t mind lending it us as long as we left a car for her to borrow.’’
“Yeah, that sounds great,’’ I sigh smiling, liking the fact I get to spend another night with him.
“So, I didn’t scare you away last night?’’ he asks hesitantly and when I turn to look at his side profile, his head is down somewhat and his eyes focused on the floor, his hands tucked into his zip up jacket.
“No, you didn’t scare me off,’’ I tell him honestly.
“You sure? You seem a little off this morning since I got back.’’
“Myles,’’ I call, stopping. Once he realises I’ve stopped he turns around and walks back to me. “Last night was the first kiss I’ve ever had. It was the most extraordinary, breathtaking, and you can take that literally,’’ I chuckle. “It was also something that wasn’t taken from me, but something I happily gave to you and I wouldn’t change it for the world.’’
His face is a mixture of expressions. He looks shocked, smug and damn straight happy. I give him a wide grin, wanting him to know that every word I just said is the truth, no holding back. What I feel for Myles is something I’ve never felt before, even before the attack. It’s something I never thought my body would allow me to feel, but then again, when I’m around him, that’s when I feel like I’m at my safest. I’m not dumb to think Davis was my only enemy as such. He’s not. There is a world of evil out there and I know what happened to me could have been a lot worse. But the times I’m with Myles I don’t feel any of that. It’s like he breaks down all the wall mechanisms that I built up to protect myself and my heart. I’ve never had that before. Never had a person or a place that I can feel like myself, feel safe, and he gives me that, but more importantly he gives me himself and I’ll be forever thankful for that.
“I’m glad,’’ he grins, moving forward. His one hand reaches up cupping my cheek and I let out a tiny breath, my eyes close and my cheek snuggles into his hand. God, his hands are soft. Tingles run down my cheek from his touch and I make a sound in the back of my throat. I hear him say something, but it falls of deaf ears when I feel his lips connect with mine. The softness envelopes mine and I clutch onto his strong biceps for support when my legs threaten to give out.
My stomach flutters dangerously and I feel like I’m about to combust, but then his tongue massages against mine and that’s all I can feel, all I can think about as I mirror his movements as we explore each other’s mouths.
Explore each other’s mouths? Seriously? Could I sound any cheesier? I make it sound like I’m sticking my tongue right in there and wiggling it around, getting to know each and every part of his gums and teeth. Now I’m just ruining the kiss thinking about gums and teeth and inside I’m a giggling moron.
My hands somehow have made it up to his neck while my head ran away with my thoughts, and finding the courage I run my fingers through his hair, pulling him to me tighter and he growls low in his throat before breaking the kiss. I let out a tiny whimper of disappointment.
“God, I’ll never get bored of kissing you,’’ he whispers against my lips.
Catching my breath for a few more seconds I open my eyes to find his looking into mine and I let out a little smile. “Let’s hope not.’’
My words have double meaning. I don’t want him to get bored with me, but I also know I’m not going to be ready for anything more than kissing, and I’m hoping that will be enough for him. That’s if we last that long. If we’re even a ‘we’.
“Are we a ‘we’?’’ I blurt out, startling him and he chuckles.
“Yeah, Babe, we’re a ‘we’.’’
“What does that entail?’’
He chuckles, shaking his head at me, looking down at me with amusement. “It means, sweet Kayla, that you are mine and I am yours.’’
I grin up at him giddily. I could quite easily get used to belonging to him and him belonging to me.
He reaches down, kissing me on the lips quickly before giving me another sexy smirk. “Now, let’s get to school.’’
Chapter Twelve
KAYLA
The rest of the week passed pretty quickly, and before I knew it, it was Thursday morning.
I’ve been looking forward to today for a while. Myles is staying for dinner and overnight because we have to leave early tomorrow morning for Exhilaration. I’ve never been to a theme park before and I’m beyond excited. I’ve been looking forward to going since I got invited.
I’ve been awake since four from another nightmare. They aren’t as bad as they used to be lately and that shocks me. It’s another reason I have so much to thank Myles for.
Anyway, when dad got up at half five for work he walked into my room when he heard me shuffling about. I started to pack my case to pass the time away and he gave me some extra cash to take with me. I didn’t think he was happy about
me going because there are no adults going. Well, who he would call an adult anyway. To me, Maverick and Mason are. But when he handed over the money to me, he told me to make sure I had a good time, and if I needed any more money to just call him and he’d transfer it into my bank. He left me with my mouth hanging open in shock.
When the doorbell rings half an hour before I’m due to leave for school, I’m surprised. Myles said he would meet me at school this morning because of having to talk to one of the teachers. Happy he will be walking me to school I basically skip to the front door with a huge grin, not bothering to do my usual checks in the peephole. I feel like I haven’t seen him in days, when it’s only been a night. He came over to do some homework yesterday after school, but then left when dad got home around ten. Just thinking about having his lips against mine again is making me want to scream out with joy.
“Miss me alre-‘’
“Never, and I mean NEVER, dismiss me the way you did on Tuesday, young child. Who the hell do you think you are?’’ my mom yells and before I can brace myself for it, a hard slap connects to my face and I feel blood fill the inside of my mouth. My hand doesn’t even reach up in time to cover my stinging cheek before I’m pushed to the floor with a kick causing me to scream out in pain.
“NO!’’ I scream, trying to block her blows, but it’s no use.
Black dots blur my vision and I know I’m going to pass out at any second. Her words sound like white noise, but a few words I do make sense of.
Bitch. Ruined my life. I’ll make you pay and so on, it’s always the same. It’s never ending and the kicks keep on coming until my vision finally turns black and everything turns numb.
*** *** *** *** *** ***
By the time I wake up my mom is gone and my body is stiff and bloody on the front room floor. Bile rises in my throat and I throw up all over the laminate flooring, my body screaming out in pain when I turn over too quickly.
Rising up on all fours I wince in pain feeling like a truck has run over me. With my shaky legs I stand up, using the wall as leverage as I make my way over to the hallway, up the stairs and down to the bathroom, managing to close the door behind me without passing out again. Removing my uniform I don’t turn around or inspect my injuries until I’m fully undressed and when I do I choke in horror. All of the right side of my stomach is covered in ugly, purple and blue bruises, the swelling severest near the hip area. A few bruises cover my legs and I know the pair of shorts I packed in my case for Exhilaration will be no good to me. There is no way I can use an ‘I fell down the stairs’ excuse with these bruises. They’re ugly, swollen, and angry looking, and in no way or hell will they be better by tomorrow morning.
Tears fall from my eyes and I open my mouth, pulling my bottom lip down to inspect the damage and, as I predicted before I passed out, she has cut open the inside of my bottom lip.
I hate her.
I seriously fucking hate her.
Angry tears fall from my eyes and I wipe them away feeling furious with myself. I don’t even know why I carry on hiding her secret anymore. I’m not the naive little girl I once was. I’m stronger. I have people who love me, who care for me and will stand by me, goddamn it.
So why the hell do I feel so fucking alone? Why do I constantly feel like I can’t tell anyone what she’s really like, show them what she’s capable of? It scares me to think of the extent of damage she’ll do to me before I finally find the courage to open my mouth and tell someone. It’s not just about her, though, it’s about protecting me. I’ve always been that poor, weak, little girl that got raped, who got bullied; I don’t want to be the girl who was abused by her mother to. It’s stupid and idiotic, I know, but I just don’t want people to know how weak I really am.
Opening the cupboard, I grab a couple of painkillers and swallow them down dry before swilling my mouth out with some water out of the tap.
The bruising isn’t as worse as it usually is and I should be thankful for that. It still doesn’t excuse the fact I’ll be going to a theme park tomorrow and going on rides that will jolt me about. With my bruises taking the brunt of it I’ll be doing nothing but suffering in pain the whole day. It’s going to ruin the whole entire experience, I can feel it already. With tears blurring my vision I manage to grab my dressing gown off the back of the bathroom door and cover myself.
With a defeated sigh I take another painkiller, wanting to sleep the day away, before heading back to my room. I grab my phone where I’ve got missed calls and a few messages from Myles and Max. A small smile plays on my lips when I read Max’s message.
The fit twin: You playing hooky without me? It’s not fair. I know all the best places to hide out at and Myles didn’t have to know
After registration one day I found out Max had programmed his number into my phone without me knowing. That is until it started ringing ‘Let’s talk about sex, baby’ in the middle of classroom with ‘The fit twin’ as the caller. I could have killed him. I died with embarrassment. I was just glad the teachers couldn’t confiscate my phone from me.
I scroll down and find the message from Myles and feel my eyes water again. My mom is nothing to me anymore. I’d give everything to have him here with me, but she’s ruined that. He’ll see me for who I really am.
Weak.
The only twin: I’m outside school, where are you?
The only twin: I have got you a hot chocolate.
The only twin: Now you’re driving a hard bargain.
The only twin: Is everything okay? I’m worried. I have to go in, but if I haven’t heard from you by lunch time I’ll come around.
Looking at the time on my phone quickly, I’m thankful to find out I wasn’t out very long. So I quickly type back my lie and hate every second of it.
Me: I’m spending the day with my dad. He feels bad he has been spending too much time at work, and because I’m gone the weekend he said I may as well call in sick. I’m going to have to cancel tonight too, but don’t worry about collecting me, I’ll meet you at yours. X
Putting my phone back down on the bedside table I quickly go downstairs in case my dad comes back to see puke and blood on his front room floor. I’ll never be able to explain the blood and sick.
It doesn’t take me long to clean up the mess and when I look up I find my mom’s handbag on the floor by the front door. Panicking that she’s going to come back for it, I rush over to it, wanting to chuck it as far as I can outside without hurting myself further. When I get to the bag though my hands shake and I end up dropping the entire contents all over the floor. In a mad rush I throw it all back in, wondering why the hell my mom needs all this crap in her handbag. She has a fucking bottle opener in here for Christ’s sakes. A letter grabs my attention, from the corner of my eye, and I pick it up with shaky hands and open it.
I scan it quickly, not wanting to get caught reading it, but it’s all a bunch of words on paper that I don’t understand. The basics is that she owes money, but that isn’t what concerns me, it’s the why she owes money. When she and my dad got divorced the costs were covered in the settlement, so I don’t understand.
Not wanting the bag in here a second longer, I put the letter back in the envelope and remind myself to mention it to my dad when he’s back. I look outside the window checking the drive before opening the door and putting the bag right outside the door, not wanting her to miss it or for it get stolen which will have her banging it down and punishing me even more. It’s more than likely I’ll get the blame for her forgetting it anyway.
I seriously hate her. Just thinking about her is making me angry and I end up slamming the door shut, another stream of angry tears falling from my eyes.
The whole of my body is throbbing and all I want to do is go curl up in ball, lie down on my bed and cry myself to sleep. I just want to forget about today, and concentrate on tomorrow, knowing I’ve got to somehow manage to fake being fine in front of seven other people. I’ve done it for years now, fake my own happiness. I’ve perfect
ed it to a T, but Myles and his family, they see right through it.
My eyes are sore when I wake up, and everything around me is a blur my head is killing me that much. It also doesn’t help the pain killers I took earlier make me dizzy and nauseous, but it’s got to better than the pain in my side, which seems to have dulled a little thanks to them.
When some of my senses start to come alive, I feel a presence in the room with me and my whole body goes ramrod straight. After cleaning up the sick earlier downstairs, I put on a pair of pyjamas and in my rush to just go to sleep, I just threw whatever was at the top of the pile, which happened to be a tank top with a pair of skimpy shorts, and I know for a fact whoever is in the room has seen my bruises.
My face is to the wall and ever so slowly I roll onto my back and immediately look over to my desk to where I find Myles sitting down on my desk chair, looking sad. His head is bent down, and his eyes look red, but from this angle I can see his jaw is clenched.
“Myles?’’ I call out making him jump. His eyes reach mine and I tear up when I see the depth of his sadness seeping out through his expression.
“Who?’’ is all he manages to say, his voice hoarse and firm.
“Pardon?’’ I ask, pretending not to know what he’s talking about.
“Don’t play me, Kayla. Who did that to you? I’ve seen the bruises. Your shirt rode up when you were asleep, so when I came in to check on you I saw them. So did Max. We were worried when we saw your dad in town with Katie and said he hadn’t seen you since this morning. So tell me, Kayla, who did it?’’ he bites out and my eyes widen in shock.
“I really don’t want to talk about it, Myles. Please don’t make me,’’ I whisper.
Myles (Carter Brother#3) Page 14