by Cyn Bagley
I could tell by the way he kept his face neutral that he didn’t believe me. It was crazy. I knew it was crazy. Why would anyone invade our house? We were poor and had very little. Even the phone I carried was an extreme luxury. But I had insisted that grandmother and I each have one so that we could contact each other for the baby’s sake.
Jake’s eyes softened when he looked at the baby. His words echoed in my head. “Your son is a werewolf.”
“No,” I said. Oh gawd, he was right. “They were coming to steal the baby.” I felt ice creep into my heart. My voice became harsher. “Why?”
He looked at me sadly. “Normals don’t know how to train pups.”
I picked up my baby and ran back to our bedroom. For a second time I locked that door. I set my son in the crib and dangled the keys in front of him. He grabbed at them and giggled. What I really wanted to do was to howl and scream. Jake was one of them. Jake would take away my baby. Dave was one of them. I couldn’t trust him either.
I forced myself to take deep long breaths to stop myself from hyperventilating.
###
An hour later there was a quiet knock on the door. I sat on the edge of the bed, my head whirling with thoughts of running away with the baby. There were too many obstacles. It was too cold outside and the car had been towed. I didn’t have any money so I had lost that escape route. I couldn’t even pay for car repairs. If I ran out of the cabin into the woods with my son, then we would die from exposure.
I could feel my fingers and toes turning blue as I imagined stomping through the snow. If the weather didn’t get me then the wolves, who had been singing around the cabin, would. I refused to think about werewolves. First, they were impossible. Plus I couldn’t get my head around something so creepy. My grandmother had told me stories of evil witches who turned into animals. The witches would throw furs around their shoulders to turn into wolves, and run through the desert. They would eat anything in their path and had really liked the taste of human flesh.
If my son was a shapeshifter I feared for his future. I wasn’t sure how a human became a witch. It was so terrible that our community only spoke of them in whispers. My grandmother had refused outright to talk about them except in stories. “To name them is to call them,” she had said.
The knock on the door changed to a scratch. It was lower down. I set my son in the crib, grabbed the flashlight, and opened the door with one hand. I felt a surge of anger. If Jake tried to take my son, I would hit him until he bled. This was my son. I had carried him for nine months in my belly. No one was going to take him from me.
A large wolf brushed past the door and into the bedroom. I faced him, the flashlight high over my head. My back brain was shocked and gibbering. When he showed no teeth, I lowered the flashlight. My arms shook. He planted all four feet and watched me carefully. Then he sniffed the air in front of me. The back brain relaxed just a little. I looked into the wolf’s eyes.
“Jake?” I asked. My voice was uncertain.
The eyes had intelligence, and it knew me. One part of me watched him and observed that he didn’t walk further into the room. The back brain was still gibbering that if he got too close to me, he could rip my throat out. I backed away slowly and dropped bonelessly on the bed.
“Ooooo-ow?” he questioned and cocked his head to one side. My heartbeat slowed down. For a moment I saw blackness, and then I gasped. I had been holding my breath too long. When my eyesight came back, he had shoved his nose into my hand. I froze as he sniffed it. Soon he was next to me on the bed. I dropped the flashlight on my foot. I didn’t feel the pain because I was so scared.
“Ouch,” I said. The wolf was already next to the crib and was sniffing my son’s toes. The danger was past but I still didn’t want him to get too interested in my son.
I drew his attention back to me by scratching under his chin and then around his ears. “Okay, okay,” I said when he pushed his nose into my lap. It was like he was talking to me and telling me that I was safe. His head was still in my lap, when I heard the front door open. “Hello, hello.” said a familiar voice. It was Dave.“Anyone home?”
The wolf quickly left the room. I heard Dave say, “Jake, are you trying to scare Nova?”
Dave must have opened the door because I felt a cold blast, then Dave came down the hallway. “Nova,” he called.
He stood in the doorway of my room and looked at us. I could see a slight sadness in his eyes, then he gave me a big smile. “I see you got here safely. Has Jake been taking care of you?”
I didn’t know what to say to Dave— maybe “You son of a bitch?” He was one of them. After seeing Jake’s wolf form, I could feel it. I picked up my son and avoided Dave’s eyes. I looked into my son’s dark brown eyes. There was something in those eyes that reminded me of Jake. It was wild.
“You could have told me that you wanted my son,” I said. There was hostility in my voice. Dave stepped back.
“Angry?”
I changed the subject. “I tried to call you, but there is no cell coverage here.” My voice rose to a high pitch.
There was an uncomfortable look on his face. He took a long breath and let it out. “We have a sat phone here. It’s expensive, but—” he shrugged his shoulders.
I wanted to yell at Dave. I wanted to tell him to get out like I had done with Jake, but I had known Dave for years. Why hadn’t I known he was a werewolf?
“Are you one of them?”
Dave shifted uneasily, but nodded his head. yes. Then he opened his mouth, “It wasn’t our pack that tried to steal your baby.” He blurted it out like he was trying to get into my good graces.
“So who?”
“It’s a long story,” Dave said. “Won’t you be more comfortable on the couch? I’ll make some coffee and we’ll talk.”
I followed him into the living room. Damn. I wanted to talk to my grandmother. I wanted her wisdom. I missed her and I couldn’t feel her. I feared she was gone.
I sat down on the couch after placing my son on a blanket on the floor. He was trying to roll over. Dave went into the kitchen and started a pot of coffee. The rich aroma tickled my nose. I wanted a cup.
The front door opened and the wolf walked in. He sniffed the boy, licked his face, and trotted to the back bedroom. I suspected that Jake would be changing back to his human form to help Dave with the explanations.
Dave brought three mugs of coffee and handed me one of them. We sat quietly and watched the little one punch the air. My son moved his legs back and forth. “It won’t be long till he is crawling,” said Dave. “We develop pretty quickly.”
We sat quietly until Jake slipped into the living room. His presence made the hair on my body stand up. He looked at this little tableau of Dave, the baby, and me. Then he sat down next to me on the couch. It was time to talk.
Chapter Five
Jake had a mug in his hands and he sipped it as he glanced back from the baby to me. The frown lines in his forehead creased as he nodded at Dave. This was the first time I had seen them together. There was a brooding power to Jake that I had never seen in Dave. Those moments with Dave were nothing to the attraction I felt with Jake. I pulled my hormones together and turned my attention to Dave.
Dave set his mug down and then began. “We knew that the baby was one of us as soon as I got a whiff of you during your pregnancy.”
The thought of Dave sniffing me, did not sit well with me. Instead of letting the words rise to my tongue, I bit them off and held them in. After I heard this story, I would have time to show my displeasure.
Dave continued, “I brought your condition to the pack.” He nodded to Jake. “They decided to leave the child with you especially when I told them you were in a good situation.”
I couldn’t let that go. “A good situation?” I stopped. “I was living with my grandmother, I was working two jobs, and I was getting my GED. How would this be a good situation?”
Jake laughed. It was a bitter sound and it scraped across my ner
ves. I turned my head so I could see him better. “Darling,” he drawled. “There are much worse situations.”
Oh yeah, there were a lot of children being born to drug-addicted mothers, who either didn’t know how or didn’t want to take care of their children. I shuddered at the thought of a werewolf pup raised in that situation. How would he turn out? Would he trust anyone? When he transformed, would he take revenge on humans? I didn’t want to think about it.
Jake took a sip of his coffee. Dave continued talking. I turned to Dave, but I could still feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. Jake was watching me and I could feel his eyes. I needed to hear what Dave had to say, so I ignored Jake.
Dave kept droning on about giving me ajob, and offering my grandmother money for her crafts. My throat tightened as I broke into his ramblings. “Who tried to kidnap me and my son?”
When Dave started in on his story again, I cut him off again. “Just tell me. Who wants my son and why?”
Dave looked toward Jake, and Jake nodded.
“The feds,” Dave said. “The feds want your son to experiment on.”
I was shocked. If the feds wanted my son, I would have nowhere to run. I had seen the shows where Marshals hunted down criminals and crossed State lines to do it. “Why?” I asked again.
“Look,” he said. “I know you saw Jake’s wolf form.” I nodded. “And that is the reason the Feds want a child. They want to experiment on them, turn their flesh and blood into vaccines and make super soldiers.” He picked up his mug and took a sip, then his mouth pursed as if it was bitter. Dave liked his coffee with cream and sugar, so I knew it wasn’t his coffee face. His thoughts were probably as bitter as mine.
“Is that what happened to your brother?” I leaned toward Dave, watching his face.
In the days when I had come to the cabin in the summer, Dave had a brother who was disabled. He had been in a wheelchair at birth—some problem with a part of his spine missing and lack of spinal fluid to his legs. I didn’t know all the details. A few years later his brother was never seen again. Many quadriplegics die young, so I hadn’t been surprised when I heard of his death.
“Did they take him?” I asked Dave. I saw his face crumble. “You know this from experience.” I said with certainty. “They stole your brother.” I paused. “How do you know he is dead?”
I saw a wall fall and his eyes went from sadness to blankness. I couldn’t read his expression. “They sent his body back with a note that if we were smart we would cremate him.”
I gasped. I felt backed into a corner. I knew that if some secret project wanted my son, I would have no way to protect him. I felt angry and helpless and I wanted to scream and break things.
I calmed down just a little and yelled at Jake, “How can I protect my son?” Dave abruptly stood up and left the room. “What’s wrong with him?”
Jake showed teeth. “He loved his brother.”
“Oh,” I said. I felt like a monster. I hadn’t thought of how Dave would be grieving at the murder of his brother and how his brother had been thrown away like trash. Still, my priorities were to my son. I needed to protect him. My little boy had no idea the danger he was in.
My son smiled at me from the blankets and kicked his legs. I smiled back. I would do anything to keep this child safe. I would kill if I must. My face hardened.
“You can give your son to us and we will protect him.” Jake took a long look at my face. “I think you wouldn’t do that though. If we took the child from you, you would follow us to the ends of the earth.” There was approval in his voice. “We’ll take you both with us. There is a place where a pack has fought the feds and won. They have the resources to fight them—”
Jake looked at my face again and then said, “Did you know the feds have a court order declaring you an unfit mother?”
I was shocked and offended. I mean really offended. I glared at Jake, “On what grounds?”
“Selling and dealing drugs. They have your grandmother in jail awaiting trial right now.”
I felt a sense of relief. I thought that they had killed my grandmother. “We need to—” Then I looked down at my son. My grandmother would not like to be rescued at the expense of her grandson.
“Okay,” I said “on one condition. Once my son is safe, we need to rescue my grandmother.”
Jake nodded his head. “Glad you are finally thinking straight, little girl.”
I bristled.
#
Leaving my son in the living room with the Jake, I walked outside to take a breather. The coldness hit me in the face and I gasped. I should have worn a scarf, but I stayed there and leaned back against the outside wall. The trees were covered in snow. I could hear a drip, drip as the sun melted the snow in the tops of the evergreens. The wind blew through my light shirt. I shivered.
I couldn’t think in the cabin because of the overwhelming presence of Jake. I wasn’t going to be bent to his purposes. Still, their story was fantastic. If I hadn’t seen Jake’s other form, I wouldn’t have believed them. I didn’t want to believe that my son was one of them.
I remembered the young man who had danced me into bed. He had been as new to love as I was. It was a shock when I got pregnant. It was my first time.
I had believed my friends, who had told me that it took more than one sexual encounter to get pregnant. I laughed now. That pregnancy had changed my life. I couldn’t remember the boy’s name. I was drunk at the time. So when the child was born, I hadn’t known what name to put on the birth certificate.
I shivered in the cold as my mind started going in circles. I tried to remember the boy's face, and if he changed in my presence. I could remember nothing.
Jake came out of the cabin with a coat in his hand. He helped me into it. I felt his warm hands on my shoulders. I felt so raw inside. Before I could say another word, he opened the door of the cabin and disappeared into the warmth.
Dave’s four-wheel drive truck was sitting in front of the cabin. I could leave with the baby and go to Mexico or to Canada. I could hide and no one would find us. If I stole the truck, Dave wouldn’t report it stolen. I could strand them here. They still had the satellite phone. We could disappear from the men who were chasing us.
Logic kicked in. I didn’t have enough resources. I had less than twenty bucks in my purse. It wasn’t enough to even fill the truck with gas. I could run and hide, but it was much harder with an infant. If Dave hadn’t sent me to the cabin, the feds would have already found us. I would be jailed or dead and my son would be an experiment.
I sighed. The inner voice did believe the two men. I believed Dave because he had never lied to me. If I believed Dave then I had to believe Jake. I closed my eyes and tried to blink back the tears. I would have to trust them.
The wet snow had melted enough that I could see the dirt underneath. I had been standing here too long and I was cold. We needed to leave soon. If we didn’t, the snow-covered road would become mud and we would be stuck in this cabin until spring. I was sure that our pursuers would have found us before then. They had the resources.
I went inside. The men had already packed our things. Boxes and suitcases were in the living room. Dave was in the kitchen checking the stove and turning off lights and electricity. He turned off the water so it wouldn’t freeze in the pipes.
“You were so sure that I would come with you?” I asked Jake, who held my son. I noticed that he really knew how to hold a baby. It made me wonder if he had a family of his own. My stomach clenched. Then I smiled. If he had a wife and family, then it would be easier to ignore these feelings.
“Dave told me you were a smart girl,” Jake said. “I believed him.”
Warmth spread from my stomach into my chest. Jake handed my son to me. I didn’t look into his face because I was afraid he would be giving me that knowing look. I watched him pick up several boxes and take them outside. I took a deep breath and wrapped the baby in some warm blankets.
Chapter Six
; When I had been thrown out of high school for drugs, alcohol, and being absent, I had wanted to confront the principal. I hadn’t cut school any more than her favorite students. I didn’t do drugs. Yes, I drank alcohol and yes, I was too young. We were in a small school and the principal knew each of us by name. She knew I was pregnant. My attitude did suck. I didn’t want to be there either. But I wanted a diploma. My grandmother had pulled me aside and said in her quiet voice that I needed to use my energy for the things that mattered. I had listened.
Dave started the truck and I buckled my seat belt. I could stay here or I could go with my son. I really had no choice. I loved my son and wouldn’t leave him with strangers. I felt a fierceness and a need to protect him. I rubbed my forehead and stared straight at the back of Dave’s head. I refused to look at Jake.
I could feel Jake’s energy even when I didn’t look at him. He felt like a dog that wanted to smell me, and then sit on my lap. I tried to push that awareness away. I didn’t want to like him or to trust him. Dave was my friend. Jake was the dangerous stranger.
This awareness of Jake pushed against me until I growled. Jake chuckled and kept his eyes on the road. The truck bucked over the bumps in the snow-covered dirt road. I held onto the door handle and swayed back and forth. Then I glimpsed Jake’s hands. They were large and calloused. I blushed as I thought of those hands touching my face and other places.
“What do you do, Jake?” I blurted. I needed to redirect my thoughts. I was being kidnapped by Jake, and dammit, by Dave. I glared at Dave’s head for moment. I didn’t want to talk to them. Still the words were out.
He glanced back and his eyes smiled at me. “I’m a carpenter. I make and install cabinets.” The quiet extended for a moment as I felt the bumps from the ruts in the road.
Then Dave spoke up, “He is more than a carpenter.”
I waited for more information, but neither man was forthcoming. When I was closer to a cell tower, I’d look Jake up. If he was “more than a carpenter,” he would be on the Internet. I rubbed my son’s belly and blew bubbles. He smiled back with bubbles in his mouth. For a moment I felt a mother's mushy moment. He was the sweetest baby in the world.