by Sheryl Seal
“What is it Brave Eagle?” Red Thunder demanded.
Mother was finished with the wards so she walked over to where Brave Eagle was pointing.
“This is my son Brave Eagle, my Queen.”
“It is very nice to meet you Brave Eagle and please call me Oria. What have you found here?”
“My Queen, I mean Oria… I am not sure but it appears to be tangled up in my snare. It is much bigger than the wild boar-like creatures that I usually capture and it seems to be a bit wilder, more like the great wild cats that come out at the full moon.” He started hauling the snare up the cliff.
At once I felt a tugging all around me and I struggled to move but I was trapped. My vision faded and the conversation became hard to hear. I was being torn from my mother and could no longer feel her thoughts. There was a snap of electricity that whirred through me and I felt myself being shoved into my mortal body.
“I am ensnared? This is so inhumane. Are you crazy, you rotten good for nothing son of a…”The words dying on my lips, I noticed first, many people standing around smirking and then I noticed my mother. I could tell by the look on her face she was mortified. She recovered quickly and with her hands on her hips she asked that Brave Eagle please let her daughter, the ‘Wild Cat’ out of the snare.
I tried to smooth my wild hair out of my face and pull myself together. Brave Eagle took out a knife and started cutting me free. “Hello mother, I…”
What is life?
It is the flash of a firefly in the night.
It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime.
It is the little shadow which runs across
The grass and loses itself in the sunset.
Crowfoot, Blackfoot warrior and orator 1830 – 1890
Chapter 9
My mother was holding up her hand to silence me. She knew I would have some kind of excuse as to why I was here but she didn’t want to hear it. I could also see that she muffled the smile with her hand, which tried to break out across her face. I could feel her thoughts and feelings as well as my own from that day. I didn’t need to be in her body to know what she was thinking, if she didn’t block her mind, I could read her thoughts easily. I remember this moment in time as I tried to read her thoughts. Through her life she had managed to master this gift but now there was no reason for her to block her thoughts. Her memories of the day I came to the Beyond once again without permission, were full of fear, disappointment and also an odd sense of pride. She had decided she did want to hear my reasons for the disobedience. “What in The Great Spirit’s name are you doing in this world Spirit Walker? Didn’t I tell you that you couldn’t come and were grounded from here? What do you have to say for yourself?”
I tried to stay focused on the way mother perceived the events of the day. I kept my composer as I tried to explain why I came to be in the Beyond. “I’m sorry mother, really I am, but I was curious and there are rumors going around that we are coming to live here. Is the gossip true? Can we come and live in this wonderful world of waterfalls?”
“Since when do you listen to gossip Spirit Walker? This is no excuse for you to disobey me. How long have you been here? Never mind, I think I know the answer to that. Being ensnared in a trap proves that you were careless with your life once again. You are here now and we will discuss this at a later date. This is my friend Red Thunder and his son Brave Eagle. You are in Brave Eagles snare.” Then she did let out a small laugh.
Stepping out of the last of the trap that Brave Eagle had cut me free from, I hugged Red Thunder like I had known him my entire life. He returned the hug with a twirl and set me back on the ground while I giggled. “You are as beautiful as your mother, nothing like that ugly father of yours.” Red Thunder laughed boisterously at his own joke and it sounded beautiful to my mother’s ears. I could feel the happiness in her spirit although she was still angry with me. She was definitely disappointed in my behavior and wondered how I would ever make a good Queen if I couldn’t follow her simple orders. Having mother feel disappointment in me was not what I wanted. I could follow orders but often I was more curious and would disobey them. I knew I would have to make this up to her and prove that one day; I would make a great Golden Queen.
How could I explain that I didn’t even know how I came to be here in Brave Eagles snare? It has to be part of my gift of walking through souls but it had never happened this way before now. I walked out of mother’s thoughts and felt ill. After a few minutes thought I would try reading again. I opened the book to see what else mother may have thought on that day.
I knew you couldn’t resist reading more Spirit Walker, your curiosity is one of the things I admire most about you. Although we have had our differences, you must know how very much I love and admire many things about you. As you may have discovered, you do not have to read my words. This is part of your gift. You may read on or just walk through my memories. You are a Spirit Walker but this may be confusing for you at times. You know of this gift but it is different than walking through dreams. I will keep the words written in case you ever need them. Sometimes you may just want to see my words. There may also come a time when you will not be able to walk through my memories. Do not pout; it is the way of The Great Spirit. This journal may help you in the future to understand that powers may often change. You need to keep practicing the art of walking through minds; this is a powerful gift that has not been given before to a Dweller. There is a reason you were gifted with it. For now continue walking through my mind of the past. It will not have any effect on what is happening at the moment. These are just memories that will help you understand what it means to be a Queen of the Ahwahneechee.
Once again, I put the book down and thought about mother and the day I came to the Beyond. It happened much quicker this time and I was in mother’s memories and walking through her thoughts. This time it was stronger, clearer and knowing that I belonged here, I no longer felt guilt at spying or uncomfortable listening in on my mother.
Mother noticed out of her peripheral vision, that Brave Eagle was standing strong and proud and waiting for me to acknowledge him. She could see I was watching his reaction out of the corner of my eyes and playing it up, I made him wait a bit longer before I finally looked his way though. Then I looked him up and down and smiled sarcastically. “Is this the only way you can catch your women Brave Eagle, to ensnare them in your barbaric traps like animals? The world has changed I hear, but we are not cavemen and women.”
Brave Eagle had let out an exasperated breath. “That trap was not meant to capture women, and you ruined our dinner. Now another snare will have to be put up or we will all go hungry.” He said irritably. “And another thing you spoiled little…”
This all seemed to be quite comical to Red Thunder, whose chuckles were hard to ignore, but mothers patience was wearing thin with me. Once again I had defied her but now she felt that I was rudely trying to goad Brave Eagle into a fight, which she had no time for. Her anger at me had reached the ends of her nerves but her mind turned toward other immediate threats that I had stepped right into the middle of. “Alright you two, that is enough! We have work to do and you are wasting our time. Where is your brother Spirit Walker, is he also lurking around here somewhere?” She softened her voice as she asked about my brother and the anger in her calmed.
“No mother, he warned me not to come and I waited until I was alone, then I came through the border.”
“You are careless with the life that you have been given Spirit Walker. Brave Eagle can you take my daughter back to the village and leave her with grandfather?”
“Yes my Queen, I will do this for you.” He said grudgingly. “Come on Wild Cat, can you fly or do you just screech and squawk? I would like to get back here before they are finished with all the wards.”
“WHAT? WHY YOU…” I checked my temper and bit back the smart reply that would have followed and shifting, I stormed away from him.
Mother’s thoughts were one of pride as she watched me
lift off the ground as my beautiful gold and silver dragon. I took to the air in an array of iridescent colors that blazed and shimmered under the sun.
I could see from the sky as I waited for Brave Eagle that he was awestruck. After a moment he kicked the ground, threw down the snare and shifting into a beautiful golden Eagle, he was in the sky right behind me. I could hear his curses in the air. I could also hear mother’s thoughts as she sent a message through my mind. “Be careful with Brave Eagle, you may have met your match. Hear how he called you Wild Cat, a childhood nickname we have for you. How would he know this I wonder? He may be done for with you.”
What was this supposed to mean? He was already done for. “You are mistaken mother, he is a barbarian.” I whispered to myself as I tried to forget her thoughts on me and Brave Eagle.
I looked down at the journal in my hand and feeling drained from this new experience and gift; I decided to relax my mind and once again, I read as mothers thoughts were penned in this magical book. Quickly the journal filled in the blanks for me of what occurred after Brave Eagle and I left.
I looked over at Red Thunder and he just shook his head and smirked. He knew that you two were in for a wild ride as well as I did, Words were not needed between us on this. It was as clear as the nose on your face. Fight it all you like as I know that is your way. Remember also that I have had dreams and have seen what will be.
So we finished putting the wards on all the borders. We then searched for more that had opened up when the world was reborn. Some were not easy to find and it was more, that I could feel where they were. I didn’t know if we had them all but I felt safer and with the world still growing, there could always be a chance that more borders would show themselves anywhere at any time. We would have to keep Dwellers on the alert and eyes in the sky at all times. These are the things you need to be aware of Spirit Walker. These doorways come from seemingly nowhere and are very dangerous my dear. You must go with your inner spirit and feelings. Sometimes that is all we have to guide us in life and this is what you must listen to.
Probably the hardest ward was the one I didn’t have time for when the world was destroyed. Horsetail Falls would be where my regrets lay. Once again I tried to push the memories to the back of my mind as I finished putting the wards up. The memories kept flooding me and Red Thunder tried to comfort me and my regrets. He gave me advice that is good to live by. “We cannot live in the past of what ifs my Queen. It is time that we move on and look to the future. We have plenty to look forward to and a village to expand. We need to move the rest of our people home and I think we should have a celebration. There is still much to speak of and much more to learn. I would hear about my brother Grey Wolf now. Where is he?”
This is good advice. It comes from a heart that is brave and true. This advice comes from one who has been through a lot. It is hard to hear the facts and take advice when your heart leads you. Once you have made a few decisions in your life as a Golden Queen, you will understand more on how hard it is to rule with your head and not your heart. I did what I thought was right to save my mother, in the end it did not matter, the Ale escaped and much of the world was destroyed. I know that the Great Spirit has a plan and believe me I have thought on this much over the years. As grandmother would say, “All will be revealed when the time is right.”
“Of course you are correct Red Thunder and I expect Grey Wolf soon. He doesn’t yet know…” dropping to my knees, I sucked in my breath and felt the searing pain that flew across my back. You know of the connection between your father and me. The pain I felt was excruciating and I knew he was somewhere evil and dark. He needed help immediately but I didn’t know where to look. As Red Thunder helped me to my feet and I explained my fears, he knew there was only one person to turn for what I was feeling, grandfather.
We shifted and went in search of grandfather for the answers to what was going on with your father. I know these are hard words to hear, but he is in a very dark place and I could feel the torture his human form was being put through. After seeking the guidance of grandfather, I will now go in search of your father. I promise I will bring him home.
“You will have to be strong and take charge. The time is now, to be The Golden Queen and lead the Dwellers of Ahwahnee.”
I looked around and noticed I was alone although it felt that mother was right here with me. The words I read were as clear as if she was standing in front of me and once again, I was left with confusing thoughts. It was as if the words on paper and the thoughts of mother were fighting for control. “I have to be more careful or I will end up lost in a world of memories.”
This was the last entry, I had not seen mother after she came back to the village to consult with grandfather. She left in the night alone, which was over a month ago. Much has happened in the village but nothing new has come to light of where my mother and father are. How does this help me to find my parents?
Feeling frustrated at not having more information, I slammed the book shut and a powdery puff of fairy dust escaped the pages. “I will return to the village and ask grandmother how these words have helped me to find mother and father.” I stated to myself.
Lakota Prayer
Wakan Tanka, Great Mystery, teach me how to trust my heart, my mind,
My intuition, my inner knowing,
The senses of my body, the blessings of my spirit
Teach me to trust these things
So that I may enter my Sacred Space and love beyond my fear,
And thus walk in balance with the passing of each glorious Sun.
According to the Native People, the Sacred Space
Is the space between exhalation and inhalation
To Walk in Balance is to have Heaven (spirituality)
And Earth (physicality) in Harmony
Chapter 10
~Grey Wolf~
I felt the burning whip once again on my back. My body shook from the pain which seared through my human skin. Tightening and going slack I hung there helpless. There was some kind of force shield around this hell pit that I had stumbled into.
Without communication with the God’s my parents, or my wife the Golden Queen, I held out little hope that I would soon be found.
“Are you ready to pledge allegiance to me yet Grey Wolf?”
Gathering what little strength I could, I spat at this monster who considers himself, the ruler of the land. “I WOULD RATHER DIE FIRST! I will not give my loyalties over to any other than, The Great Spirit.”
“We shall see warrior, I have much time for the tortures that you will endure and I am very creative. I never tire and you are helpless here in my eternal hell.”
I raised my head as far as I could and looked into monstrous red eyes. This creature was older than time itself. He was huge but what he was exactly, I cannot say for sure. He shifted in between different species and they were all indistinguishable. His features made me dizzy and sick to my stomach whenever I tried to focus on him. His eyes never changed and I now only looked here.
With the fire whip of pain striking me for what seemed like the millionth time, I felt some relief as he exited the room where I was being held. I knew this because the stench that came with him receded and now there was only darkness once again.
I relaxed my body so I would just hang there with my arms and legs in some kind of irons that were specially made to hold a God. There had been many changes with the structures of elements as well as other things in the world. These changes were an array of different metals, animals, people, and many more variations that I had no way of knowing yet.
I wasn’t sure how long I had been here or how long he would keep me alive. His sole purpose seemed to be to recruit me.
“I WILL DIE FIRST!” I shouted into the dark again. It appeared that he was gone for the moment but I knew he had heard me. I could hear his roaring laughter as it echoed off the cave walls.
I let my head fall to my chest again as that little burst had taken most of my energy from me. I
tried to conserve as much as possible. I knew the worlds I had traveled in had some new species in them. This was just another one of those worlds with strange beasts. This one was a strong creature and was unlike others I had encountered. It seemed much older even than time itself. However, all that I know has taught me, that everything has a weakness and this creature was no different. Thinking that he was some sort of under lord was proof of this. That he could take over the world and bring me to my knees and do his bidding, another mistake. “I WILL NOT FORSAKE MY MAKER!” I yelled and the echo of my own voice was all I heard this time.
I knew my heart and soul could not detect me in other worlds and she may never find me here in this world, so my only hope, was for The Great Spirit. I started praying as I have always done. I pray for the understanding of the destruction of the worlds. I pray for the safety of my family and that they can make a new world of security for themselves. I pray they will be strong and move on to the future, a future I may not be a part of. I pray for the strength I will need when the end is near. I pray my human flesh will not survive this brutal torture for much longer.
As I slip into my dreams where I find solace, a smile spreads across my face. Only one woman could bring a smile to me, when I know there might not be hope for any future with her. I have had a good life for all the hardships we have had to overcome. Life in the world was not as we had hoped and dreamed of together.
With the destruction of all the worlds, we had to make a new life in a new world. It was not always easy and those first years we were just happy to be alive.
Rebuilding a life that would keep us all safe and a village where we could all live in harmony was the easy part in the land of lost souls. The land was enchanted and the village thrived. Our children were all born strong with amazing gifts bestowed to them.