by Jaymin Eve
She nodded, her eyes closing briefly. "There was so much pressure on me, but it never really felt beyond what I could handle.” A strangled laugh escaped her. "Honestly, I'm still not sure if I wanted to fail or not. If I did, I'd be able to step away from this world and my duty as a princess and reclaim my Earth life. But at the same time, I would have been devastated if I’d failed." Her eyes met mine, searching. "I'm insane, right?"
Unable to help myself, I reached out and wrapped my fingers around her forearm, drawing her closer. "What you’re feeling is completely normal. It's the reason my brothers and I want to step away from being leaders of the American supes. The job consumes our time and emotions, and since we’ve been on quite a few world-saving adventures recently, we can’t give it the energy it deserves. The energy our people deserve."
A dark heaviness flickered across her face, settling into those depthless eyes. “What are you thinking?” I asked, needing to know.
"How can we make this work when we're from two different worlds?" she asked, honest as always.
She was serious, and I didn’t dismiss her worries, even if they weren't my own.
"We make it work the same way Tyson and Grace do." Thankfully, we weren't pioneering this style of relationship. "We make it work any way we can, because there’s no other option."
She shook her head, clearing her throat suddenly. "Sorry, I kind of jumped the gun a little there. Last time we talked, you weren’t even sure you wanted a true mate bond."
Flames ignited around us, but unlike the times I'd lost it in the past, this was a controlled release. Learning to deal with my emotions meant I had to stop fighting them and start releasing them at a pace I was happy with.
As the circle of flames surrounded us, Justice's eyes went wide. “Impressive,” I heard her murmur.
"I was never not sure about our bond," I said, the timbre of my voice deeper than usual as the power continued to flow from me. "I was unsure about myself. The way you make me feel … it's wild and untamed and out of control. I've never dealt well with being out of control, and I was afraid that if I let it go any further, it was going to end in disaster."
She tore her eyes from the flames, finally meeting my gaze, and it was hard to read her again.
"How is now any different?" she asked.
She wanted to turn back to the flames, I could see she did, and it was no doubt to reiterate her point. But I didn't release her from my gaze. "Because now," I said slowly, allowing more power to slip free—the flames started dancing around us, forming intricate patterns and images, in a way that no one could mistake for natural—"I have found a symbiosis with the new emotions and power. I have learned a balance between rigid and relaxed control. I also missed you so fucking much that the thought of not spending my life with you … it’s a darkness I cannot embrace."
She moved until our bodies were no more than an inch apart. "It was the same for me,” she breathed. “The moment I opened the portal, I knew it was a mistake to leave. But, in the end, I think the time apart has made us strong enough to embrace this bond.”
My eyes caught on her full lips and I felt an urge to reach out and capture them between my teeth. Bite down and taste her. Thank you, Max. Fucking vampires. It was weird to think I had that energy as part of my own, but, again, I was no longer fighting the urges.
"We should get going," she whispered. Not that she was moving. If anything, she was even closer to me, our bodies all but pressed together as flames danced around us.
Not wanting to piss her parents off any further, I retrieved my fire, and in an instant the barrier that had been around us was gone.
Justice jumped, blinking like she'd been in a bit of a daze. "Shit,” she muttered, “we have to go. My parents are going to kill me if I'm late to my own party."
They wouldn't kill her; anyone could see that they adored their long-lost daughter. I was glad I hadn't shown up too soon, even if staying away was the hardest thing I’d ever done.
Justice must have picked up on that thought. "I'm surprised you did stay away for so long?"
"I visited," I admitted. I hadn't wanted her to know that, but I also didn’t want her to think I didn’t care or that our separation was easy for me. "From afar. You had a personal stalker, but I knew you needed this time with your family and this world, and I wasn't going to be a selfish asshole and take that away from you."
She swallowed roughly. "I thought I felt you a few times, but I chalked it up to missing you."
Another twist of my heart, and another swirl of fire inside, but this one was not as strong as before, so my energy remained where it was supposed to.
"What else did you do?"
This question took me by surprise. I'd done quite a few things in the time we'd been apart. Some I'd tell her about, others I wouldn't.
"The president and supes reached an agreement," I said, explaining the full agreement, followed by our plans to ensure this type of thing would never happen again.
"He's a bastard," she seethed. "I knew from the start that he was not to be trusted. I can sense men to avoid…”
She trailed off, a haunted look on her face.
"What's wrong?" I pushed, wildness in my voice. She brought out the base instinct in my nature; I would kill for her in a heartbeat. Had killed for her.
"I saw some memories during my bonding to the rubies," she finally said after a minute pause. "Some shit from my past that I had to relive. After reliving it, I got to banish those bastards and it all…" She shook her head. "It took a toll. I'm really proud of myself for fighting the darkness—those events were the worst experiences in my life. I just wish there was a way to banish the memories from my mind forever."
Her laughter was broken and jaded. "I have to learn to live with it and make sure that those men don't take anything else from me ever again."
She used to make throwaway comments like that all the time when we were together at the White House. Back then I hadn't known the specificity of the events she was referring to.
Now I did.
I knew everything—learning it all had been one of my tasks during the time we were apart.
I'd killed the men who raped her. I'd taken them apart, piece by fucking piece, and by the time I was done with them, their own mothers wouldn’t have recognized them.
I'd saved the three little girls in their "care" as well, and I hoped that they would be as strong as Justice, moving forward in whatever way they could.
"I'm going to share my story with you," she said softly, no doubt confused by how quiet I was. She probably sensed the rage building inside, because even though I’d killed those men, I couldn’t take back what they did to her. I couldn’t return what they stole.
My rage would be eternal.
"I want to know everything about you," I said roughly. "But for the sake of full transparency, I did some research about your past. You kept making those comments about the men and your life and it ate away at me."
I wouldn't lie to her. No relationships could be built on lies, even if I wasn’t sure how she’d take the news.
Justice dragged her heels just as a massive estate came into view—her home.
"You researched me?" she finally asked, and I couldn't tell if she was pissed or not.
I nodded. "I looked into your past because I couldn't fucking sleep not knowing what happened to you."
She slowed even more, and from my angle I saw her squeeze her eyes shut. "Did you learn everything?” she whispered.
"Yes."
"Fuck," she whimpered. "And do you think less of me now that you know I was raped as a child? Now that you know how broken I am?"
She was fucking lucky I'd learned how to control my energy at this stage; otherwise the ruby city would be nothing but dust.
"I think you're a goddamned warrior," I told her truthfully. "You fought battles and wars that no child should have to, and you came out the other side stronger. You're not broken, Justice, you're rebuilt. Into someone strong and
formidable. Don't forget your past, for it made you who you are, but don't downplay your future. You're a bright star, shining on all, drawing us to you with warmth and power." Her lips started to tremble, and I cupped her face in my hands, needing to fucking touch her or I would lose it. "They didn't break you," I said fiercely, believing every word, "and I’ll tell you that every single day until you believe it too."
And they’re dead, so they can never hurt you or anyone else again.
She was crying now, silent tears that slipped down her cheeks. I caught them with my thumbs, brushing them away.
"I tried to find them," she said, her voice calm despite the tears. "Because when I managed to escape, the task force couldn’t track them down, even with all my evidence. So I searched, knowing that they’d do it again to some other child, one that wouldn’t be strong enough to survive. I couldn't let that happen." She shook her head against my hands. "I never did find them. That's the worst part of all. They're still out there … those disgusting, evil fucks."
"I found them."
Her eyes went super wide as she opened and closed her mouth, so stunned it was almost comical. But there was nothing comical about this topic at all.
"You found them? How?"
Thank the gods her tears were drying up. Saved me having to kill someone else to make her happy.
"I have a lot of contacts in the supernatural world, and many of them have connections in the human world. It actually took me longer than I thought. Those two were adept at hiding, and had managed to escape and rebuild their identities many times over the years, but I was more fucking determined than they ever could be."
"Where were they?" she whispered.
"Mexico City," I said simply. "They'd been in that corner of the world for a few years from what I could tell. Working for some of the human traffickers down there."
I released her as she wrenched herself backwards, turning to vomit in a nearby garden. I wasn't sure if she wanted me to touch her or not, but I did anyway, one hand gathering her hair from her face and the other rubbing her back.
"What did you do with them all?" she asked when she could finally stand, her hand pressed against her mouth, wiping at it almost unconsciously.
I took a deep breath. I had no idea how she'd react to the truth, but I was still determined that no lie would come between us. "I killed them all. The two humans that knew you. The dozens of others in their network that I spent weeks infiltrating, and then I torched the buildings and their bodies."
She just stared at me, her face almost blank, while her hand wiped at her mouth. I wasn't sure she even knew what she was doing, but she couldn't seem to stop.
“Justice,” I said softly, trying to draw her out of her own head. “I should have checked with you, but at the time I found them, I wasn't really controlling my power as well as I am now—”
I was cut off as she threw herself forward, arms wrapping around my neck as she sobbed against me.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you," she whispered over and over.
Well, fuck.
20
Justice Winter
My head was a mess. More messy than usual and that was saying something. My first instinct at Jacob’s news was to call him a liar. What he'd said he did for me was huge. So huge that it was hard for me to even comprehend the truth of it.
But that was the "human" side of my brain, the one that still thought in the realms of human limitations. Supernaturals were not bound by such restrictions, and there was no reason to believe that single-handedly he hadn't ended those men and their whole entire operation.
And if that was the truth, I could finally let go. Every single part of it.
It was over.
But who was I without that to hold on to? To keep me up at night? To agonize over day after day and stress that my weakness had caused others suffering and pain? Who the fuck was I?
"You're thinking hard and it's worrying me,” Jacob said, his voice filled with forced lightness. “Never has it ended well when you get that look on your face."
I hadn't forgotten he was there, far from it actually, but it still almost stunned me to hear his smooth dulcet tones. "I—" I cleared my throat, words not coming. Taking a second, I used my magic to clean my mouth and tongue from the lingering taste of vomit. All of which made me feel a little better.
"I’m at a loss,” I finally admitted, “and that's not something that happens to me. I don't really know how to process what you did, and it's messing with my brain."
Not the best when I needed to be focused—I really should be entering my home to celebrate the bonding to the stones, and yet I couldn’t bring myself to move.
"Maybe I can help," Jacob said softly, and as his hand brushed across my cheek, I had to admit, it did clear some of the confusion, replacing it with a deep-seated longing for him.
I wasn't sure that was any better.
"How can you help? You've already done so much; this is just mental stuff I need to work through." Mental battles were often fought alone—I’d learned that many years ago.
"Do you trust me?" he asked, and I blinked.
“Yes.”
Funnily enough, I had no doubts that I did. You know him in your soul.
With each passing day, I was turning more and more into a Hallmark movie.
Jacob chuckled, his lips curving in this sinful way that drew every ounce of my attention, and just like that I was picturing him naked, his head buried between my thighs as he smiled up at me, right before he…
"Uh, I'm … so—" I broke off.
Jacob actually threw his head back and laughed, and it was so soothing and melodic that it calmed some of my ragged edges. "I trust you too, Ruby. This is not a fleeting bond for me.” His humor faded, and his eyes met mine. “If you’ll allow me, I have a way that will calm your mind."
"Okay," I said quickly, so worked up that I'd try anything. "I'm willing to give it a shot?"
Why the fuck was I talking so fast? Just ... why?
He opened his mouth and I expected a spell or chant ... or maybe he was going to tell me about an herb to try.
Then he started to sing.
My knees actually buckled, and I gulped to try and catch my breath. Jacob caught me in his arms, all but holding me up, and I couldn't remember the last time I hadn't been able to support my own weight except when I was badly hurt.
But that song … his voice. It did more than just fill my ears, it drifted into every crevice of my body and overflowed through my soul, soothing, loving, gently caressing the parts of me that were hurting.
Tears silently slipped down my cheeks, the cleansing kind of tears that leaked pain from the darkness inside, painting lines of sorrow on cheeks.
When he was done, I was breathless, my heart pounding hard…
"It's an ancient fey song," he said softly, and the melodic nature of his voice made sense now. He had a voice like a raspy, sexy, soothing angel. It was the most incredible sound I'd ever heard come from vocal cords—it would take a thousand instruments to sound like that, and yet Jacob did it all with just his voice.
"We are true mates," I said, as sure as I’d ever been about it. “I don’t even know how it’s possible, but would you think it was crazy if I said that melody is familiar to me.” It had taken me a few moments to remember, because I’d never heard it with words before. “During my darkest moments in life—” I swallowed hard “—that song was in my head.”
Jacob wasn’t saying anything, just watching me intently, letting me get my thoughts out. “Do you think the bond fought to save me?” I asked, my voice breaking. “Because I’m certain that melody stopped me from killing myself on a night when the demons almost won.”
"Justice…" he breathed, my name filled with agony. His eyes, they were the brightest green I'd ever seen, except for right around the edge of the white, which had a glossy red tinge to it.
I'd never seen him like this. I'd never seen him react so strongly—it was breaking … shatt
ering me, ripping me into a mess of emotions.
Because he cared.
"Is everything okay out here?"
We’d stood out the front of the royal estate for so long, someone had checked on us. The guard wore a neutral expression, but his hand was on his weapon. All the guards were equipped with a ruby-topped laser-stick, like the Earth version of a Taser, only a million times stronger. "The king and queen asked me to check in," he added when we just stared at him.
Jacob's chest started to vibrate under my hands, and I knew that this was too much. I'd pushed him too far with all my emotional dumping on him. Henry, the guard, was going to find himself facing off against a dragon if he didn’t leave, and no little ruby stick was going to help.
My hand burned where I touched Jacob. "Leave us be," I said, glaring at the guard. "Everything is fine, and you can tell my parents we'll be inside in a moment."
Henry was only a few years older than me and was a favorite of my mother’s. It was probably all the flirting—something Dad and I did not appreciate.
Whatever it was, he clearly felt a false sense of entitlement to ignore my wishes.
Unmoving, he examined me, only flinching when Jacob growled, a rumbly, menacing sound that was tinged with dark energy.
Spinning on one foot, Henry finally marched away.
"Are you okay?" I pressed, focusing on Jacob.
He didn't answer or let me go, and I could tell he was working his hardest not to lose his shit. I respected that about him.
Jacob was a good man.
"I really do trust you," I whispered, knowing it was the truth. "I've never said those words to a person before, but … you're so much more than I ever expected. You're stronger and kinder, and more emotional than the Jacob Compass I first met. You’re a good friend. I'm grateful to have met you … and I … I fucking trust you."
I was babbling words at this point, trying to fill the moment so that he would start talking again.
His eyes darkened as he stared at me, and before I could word-spew some more, his lips crashed into mine. It was a sudden, intense movement that I hadn't expected. He must have realized that, because even as he was wrapping his arms tighter, pulling me closer, he murmured: "Tell me to stop. Last chance."