by Griggs, Winnie; Pleiter, Allie; Hale, Deborah; Nelson, Jessica
Mary’s breath caught, suspended as a slow knot formed in her belly. She didn’t want to leave this precious child here, alone with a sickly mother and odd circumstances. She glanced at Lou, prepared to beg, or to at least see what options they might have, but his gaze remained fastened on Josie. His eyes looked shadowed in the dimness of the porch, pained, even.
She traced the shape of his face with her glance, giving herself free rein to stare while he was so occupied. His strong nose and jaw, the wild hair she’d kept a tad too long yet remaining fashionable.
In this moment, she realized how dear he was to her. How safe and kind. Sure, now, he had frustrating qualities. Stubborn, flippant, never anchoring anywhere for long…yet somehow she’d become attached to him.
Uneasy, she forced herself to look away, to the road where a fancy, newer-model Ford chugged to a stop in front of the house. A man emerged from the passenger door, tipping his hat to them before moving to the rear door.
Lou moved beside Mary. She caught a whiff of Wrigley’s and felt the warmth of his arm near hers. Focusing on the people in front of her, she watched as the man scooped a lady from the rear seat of the automobile.
The man carried the woman up the steps, his face young and unlined. Brown eyes met hers in passing, then traveled behind her, to where Josie still hummed on the swing. Lou rushed to the front door, opening it without knocking first.
The man nodded his thanks and disappeared inside.
“Come on.” Lou slid into the house.
He expected her to follow, but she hung back, startling when a hand slipped into hers. She looked down into Josie’s wide eyes.
“I don’t want to stay,” Josie whispered.
Mary tried to ask why but her throat was closing up. This was it. After weeks of caring for Josie, she must say goodbye. She could feel her heart cracking apart inside, sending pulsating waves of emotional pain through her body. Blinking quickly, she knelt to face the girl.
“Do you know how much I love you?” She smoothed a curl from Josie’s eyes. “You are special and a joy. Never forget that.”
“But I don’t want you to leave.” Her lip trembled and those beautiful eyes turned shiny.
“Friends are forever, sweet girl.” Mary pulled her into a hug, inhaling her scent, enveloping her in her arms and trying to memorize every moment to hold on to.
“You said God heard me. I told Him I wanted to stay with you and Mister Lou….” The girl’s voice was as trembly as her lips.
“He heard you, honey.”
“Then why am I here? My mommy can go with us. I don’t want to be here, never, ever. I never wanted to come back.”
That knot in Mary’s stomach grew. Drawing in a deep breath, she pulled back and looked Josie in the eye. “Mister Lou is going to make sure you’re safe because your mommy needs you here with her. Do you still have that thimble?”
Josie nodded.
“Whenever you’re lonely or scared, hold the thimble and remember that I’m always praying for you. And that God is looking out for you and loves you dearly.”
Josie sniffled and a lonely tear seeped from the corner of her eye. It rolled down her cheek unchecked. Mary swallowed hard, gave her one last hug and then, hands held, they went into the house.
*
Mary barely remembered the trip back to the hotel. Leaving Josie had been horrendous. The girl had sobbed, and Baggs had held her tightly when Lou and Mary exited the house. The sound had tormented Mary on the streetcar. She couldn’t speak.
When Lou stopped at his office to drop off paperwork and make arrangements for who knew what, she sat on a bench outside. Clouds drifted over the sun, and before long it started raining, but she hadn’t even noticed until Lou reappeared, picking up her luggage and leading her to a waiting streetcar.
They arrived at the Seward Hotel in the afternoon, dodging through the rain to the entrance. The massive building loomed before her. Elegant. Expensive.
Blinking back raindrops, she tried not to gape as she followed Lou inside.
She discovered the lobby was gapeworthy, however. A bell motif rounded the interior. Sparkling and clean, people of obvious wealth studded its landscape. Fur stoles, shining shoes… She huddled in a corner of the lobby while Lou checked them in, feeling out of place and wanting to disappear. A shiver coursed through her, and belatedly she realized her clothes were sopping wet.
What was Josie doing right now? Her mother was barely capable of speaking, she was so sick. She’d seemed kind, though, her eyes a paler shade of Josie’s, her smile soft yet weak. Tuberculosis was what was killing her, she’d said, speaking past her face mask. A rare strain, the doctors told her. One they had trouble treating. It seemed the Great War, coupled with the disastrous influenza pandemic, had increased tuberculosis cases. Or perhaps made them worse.
Either way, what would happen to Josie when her mother passed away? Who would care for her? The worry nibbled at Mary incessantly. She clutched her luggage closer as another shiver vibrated through her.
Lou stalked toward her, his lips still and serious. “Ready to go up?”
She nodded and followed him to an elaborate staircase. Its surface shone and she wondered how long it had taken the staff to make it look that way. How often must they clean it? She gingerly stepped up.
Lou turned to her. “Let me help you with your bags.”
“I can handle them.”
“I want to help you. Please.” His voice was sober, so she relented. “Now, our rooms are side by side. We have a dinner to attend this evening and I’ve left you something in your room. A fellow agent picked it out, in case you don’t have anything to wear.”
“I’m supposed to dress up?” She frowned.
Lou shrugged and slipped her a quick look. “You don’t have to, but we’ll be eating in the hotel’s dining area. It’s exquisite, I’ve heard. There’s music, candles…” He trailed off and looked straight ahead.
“Why such a fancy dinner?” They reached the top of the stairs and Mary followed him to the right.
“It’s been a hard day. A soothing dinner will be relaxing, don’t you think?” He shot her a half smile that faded when he saw her face. “I thought you would like it.”
Mary shook her head. “Why? Why would you think that?” Her voice sounded high-pitched, even to her ears. “This is too much…too much noise, and people. A restaurant will be filled with those who stare.” She swallowed and made her voice calmer. “I can’t help thinking of what Josie is doing right now, if she’s still crying. What will happen when her mother dies? What if that man looking for her is really her father? Or some relative who wants to hurt her?”
Lou stopped in front of a door. His jaw was clenched. She saw a muscle work in his neck. “There’s already an undercover agent that has been hired on in the house. He’ll be there tomorrow. I’m doing the best I can, Mary. Leave it be.”
“I can’t,” she insisted.
He turned slowly toward her, the key dangling from his finger. “It’s out of our hands. Your mother found a little girl and didn’t report it to the authorities. Josie’s mama has been frantic with worry and was ready to take legal steps.” A sheen crept into his eyes before he blinked it away. “Take a nap, get ready for dinner, and tonight I’ll outline how I plan to protect them.”
Hope fluttered for a moment, then spiraled to a crash. “I’m never going to see Josie again, am I?”
His gaze closed. He held out the key to her. She took it. He set her suitcase near the door. His hand came up, near her face, and she almost flinched. Some instincts couldn’t be undone.
But he moved softly and the next thing she knew, his hand was cupping her chin. Warm. Gentle. His eyes were tender.
“If it were possible, I’d make sure Josie could stay with you forever.”
Her breath caught, suspended by the unfolding of rare and beautiful feelings inside. It was as though a thousand butterflies had taken flight within her rib cage, fluttering, no, pounding to
be let out. This man who’d protected her, who looked at her with such seeing… Her pulse thrummed with strange and heady emotions.
Lips dry, she wet them with the tip of her tongue.
Lou blinked and the moment ended. His hand dropped to his side. “I’ll meet you in the dining room at seven.” With that, he pivoted and left her alone at her door, the imprint of his touch still sizzling against her cheek.
It took her a moment to recover, but when she did, she let herself into her room. The spacious interior welcomed her with warmth. A package lay on the bed, but rather than opening it, she flopped onto her back and stared at the ceiling.
So many feelings ricocheted through her that catching her breath, let alone resting, proved impossible. Thoughts of Josie intermingled with memories of The Kiss. Both tangled her nerves. After an hour of futile search for sleep, she sat up and opened her traveling case. Taking out her brush, she went to the private bath, washed her face and then combed her hair. The snarls made her wince, but she persisted until her locks fell in waves against her back.
She glanced at the package, a simple white box, which remained unopened.
“Oh, Lord, I don’t know what to do,” she whispered. Life’s even road had just become twisty and uneven. To find her footing required a wisdom she wasn’t sure she possessed. Inhaling deeply, she went to the box and lifted the lid.
She gasped. With careful fingers, she lifted out a dress more lovely than she’d ever touched. She’d seen beautiful fabrics. French silks, velvets and chiffons. But this… The fabric fell through her fingers, a wispy garment the color of a desert sunset.
She nibbled her bottom lip and surveyed the tiny glass beads across the hem, the swirls of deep reds that dashed across the bodice.
She couldn’t wear this.
She couldn’t.
And yet the simple dress she’d traveled in hardly qualified for a refined dinner.
But this dress was audacious. Every head would turn. Stare. She shuddered and dropped the silky thing to the bed. Why would Lou do this to her?
He didn’t pick it out, she reminded herself. Taking steadying breaths, she paced the length of her room. A rose sachet sat upon the dresser, but she missed the scent of her sagebrush land. She glanced at the clock on the wall.
Six o’clock.
There was time to spend praying or reading the Bible. Perhaps the Proverbs. They’d always been her comfort in times of need or stress.
When she finished chapter one, she moved to chapter two and kept going until six-thirty. Feeling more calm and as though her fears were minuscule, she put her Bible to the side and changed into the dress.
How the agent knew her size, she’d never guess. She wasn’t a tall woman, smaller than most, actually, but the dress fit perfectly. The seams stitched even and small at the hem. The narrow shoulder straps exposed more skin than Mary thought she’d ever shown in her life.
Thank goodness she’d brought her black shawl.
Now for her hair. She twisted and pinned and when a knock sounded at her door, she was ready.
She snagged her shawl and opened the door. Lou faced the opposite way, his head bent as though reading something. She closed the door behind her, hearing a subtle click.
Lou rotated toward her and his face went slack.
“What?” She touched the collar of the dress. “Did I wear the wrong thing?” She patted her hair, but everything felt tidy.
“You are…” He trailed off. Was his face turning splotchy? She stepped closer.
“Are you all right?” She’d never seen him look so…so flustered. At a loss for words. Despite the riotous emotions of the day, an overwhelming urge to laugh bubbled through her.
She covered her mouth as Lou’s jaw worked but no sound emerged.
“Resplendent,” he finally said. He stuffed the paper he held into the breast pocket of his sleek jacket and advanced toward her. Yes, his face colored pinker than normal, but his charming grin was firmly in place.
The giggle bubbled out, perhaps exacerbated by nerves and exhaustion. His smile stretched to show a hint of teeth. “May I have your arm?”
“You may.” Nerves quivering, she offered it to him.
His grasp filled her with warmth. He pressed her arm firmly to his side, effectively encasing her in his cologne and security. They matched steps. Down the stairs. Through the lobby. Into another area that served as the restaurant.
She felt eyes on her, the way they followed and perused, but the tingly apprehension she so often suffered failed to materialize. Hardly daring to breathe, let alone talk, she allowed Lou to lead her to a table.
Dinner passed in an odd mixture of unexplained excitement and lingering sadness over Josie’s absence. She’d gotten used to the girl’s energy and uncontained words. And yet the candlelight on the table, the sound of violins and clinking forks led her back to a reality in which her employer sat across from her, handsome, alive and very, very interested.
At least it felt that way.
Selfconscious, she smoothed her dress, watching as his eyes traced her movements. Heat crept through her. “Thank you for the meal, Lou.”
“It’s nice to see you enjoying yourself.”
“Good food is worth celebrating,” she returned, feeling a tug at the corners of her mouth.
“Indeed. I agree.” He lifted his glass. “And so is good company.”
Feeling flushed, she nodded. They finished their food and before she knew it, they were ready to leave. His eyes sparkled beneath the glow of the chandeliers.
“Care for an evening stroll?”
Why not? She might never visit this place again, and would she even see him after this? She pulled her shawl more snugly around her shoulders and smiled at him. “I’d love one.”
They meandered out of the hotel, away from the perfumes and into a different type of atmosphere. She clutched her shawl closer as a chilly breeze brushed by. She glanced at Lou. He looked completely relaxed, the planes of his face smooth. He’d gotten a shave somewhere, and the shadowed line of his jaw was strong beneath the street lamps. He walked as though he knew this place well.
Which, of course, he must, having the bureau’s field office here.
“It’s odd being alone together, don’t you think?” she asked.
He gave her a funny look. “Not odd to me. It’s…nice,” he finished. “Do you miss Harney County?”
“This place is so different, so many people. But what I miss more is my kitchen. My hands itch to bake.”
“Really? A literal itching?”
She smiled at him, lifting her hands. “Do you not see the rash?”
He peered at them.
She giggled and dropped her hands. “I’m teasing you, Lou.”
“Oh.” Then he cracked a smile that split through her defenses. “Mary the jokester. I like it. And what did you think of your meal tonight? You know, your cooking is tastier.” At her doubtful look, he held up a hand. “No, really. I’ve been around the world, Mary O’Roarke, and your meals rival any fine-dining experience.”
What did a girl say to that? They kept walking, and then Lou cleared his throat. Never a good sign. “I don’t know how else to say this, but tonight I was brought a telegram. We’ve got an offer on the ranch.”
Chapter Seventeen
“Did you hear me?” Lou paused beneath a streetlamp.
Mary nodded, though her heart felt as though it had lodged painfully in her sternum.
“Well, say something,” he said, his tone strained.
But she couldn’t speak. The words remained bottled inside, not yet fully formed. What could she say? It was his ranch. She’d been blessed to stay there. She blinked to ward off any unwelcome tears.
“I wish you’d say something. Tell me how you feel.” He swiped a hand through his hair. It hung in lopsided angles, tangled by his regret. “This wasn’t how I planned things to happen. The sale was expected to take months. Then, if you didn’t want to stay on with the new owners,
you’d have time to get a new job and place. Independence is within your grasp.”
She swallowed hard. “I should want such a thing.”
“What?”
“Independence. I am thirty years old. Unmarried. I should want to have my own home, shouldn’t I?” What was wrong with her that she didn’t? No, she wanted things to continue as they had. Peaceful. Secure.
Lou looked away. “Everyone wants different things, Mary. I’m sorry for uprooting you, but it needs to be done.”
She exhaled a shaky breath. “Why? For what reasons must you sell?”
He looked at her then and his eyes pierced her. “It’s never been my home. Ever. It’s been a place to sleep and a place to eat. That’s it.”
His answer cut her to the core. “Never? All those times we ate and laughed?” There’d been many times she sewed by the fire while he shared an adventure he’d just been on. It had been cozy. Familial, even. “You never felt…home?”
He sighed heavily. “Home is not something I expect to ever feel again. That’s just the way of it, and I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”
“Perhaps I do not own the ranch and am nothing more than an employee, one you’ve conveniently cast aside for new employment, but I have feelings. You don’t want to talk about it, but the longer I stand here, the angrier I get.” There, she’d told him. There had been a knot of anger growing in her belly, maybe ever since she’d found that letter after his kiss. “And furthermore, how dare you kiss me knowing you have no intention of returning?”
Yes, anger was coursing through her now, heating her blood and pouring rash words into her mouth.
“Now, Mary, hold on a minute. That kiss was completely unexpected.”
“Was it?” she challenged, and was surprised to see a furrow appear at the ridge of his brow.
“I just needed to…”
“To what?” The wind picked up, whipping hair around his face. The lamplight surrounded him and she felt as though she must be standing in darkness. Could he see her anger? How he’d hurt her with his indifference?