If she had expected him to wilt in her arms, she was quite mistaken. Instead of returning her affections, rage boiled inside him. He closed his eyes to gather his emotions. It would do no good to yell or cause a scene in public, but he did need to tell her that he did not love her anymore. However, before he knew it was happening, her lips were on his.
His eyes went wide and he pushed her away from him.
“I have longed for you,” she said with a flutter of her eyelashes. It was the same look that had first attracted him to her, but now it was a look that led to heartbreak.
“You must know,” he said, his voice no longer kind and patient, but as controlled as he could manage, “that I am to be married in three weeks. I have found someone, someone who loves me, unlike you did.”
Jane took a step back. “And what does that mean?” she asked haughtily.
“Alice does not wish to marry me for title or wealth. She asks for nothing and gives everything. That is something you could never do.”
The pout returned and a look of pain crossed her face; however, Johnathan knew it was not real. “I realize I hurt you in the past, but I do love you. You must believe me. Do you not see? I have wealth, so I do not need yours. I have more money than I could ever spend. My husband left me an estate here in Cornwall, and Green Haven is bigger and grander than the home you bought for us. He left me everything, except, of course, his title, which I am unable to take as my own. The businesses are run by men I wish to be rid of. Marry me, Johnathan! Take over the businesses. Take my wealth. Take it all. Just please, come back to me!”
She had a desperation on her face that Johnathan could not mistake. Perhaps if this had been a month earlier, he would have agreed. Now, however, he had something no amount of wealth could buy.
“I love her,” he said finally. “I no longer love you. Do not ever attempt to kiss me again. Better yet, do not speak to me ever again.”
As he strode away, he reveled in the fact that he was no longer angry at her. All he could feel was pity, for she would never understand what real love was, something that he finally had in Alice.
Chapter Twenty-One
Alice hurried her steps, hoping to catch Johnathan before he arrived at the bank. Few people strolled about, leaving the road open to her. A group of women, three in total, passed her, all handsomely dressed and in no hurry to whatever was the destination. Alice waited patiently for a cart to pass by and then she stepped into the road to pass the trio, hoping the short delay had not caused Johnathan the embarrassment of realizing he did not have his money with him.
As she continued her trek, she gazed at the different hats the women wore and smiled. Soon, those women would patronize her shop, and the thought filled her with joy. One day, it would be she who would be on her way to the bank to deposit the money her shop made. The idea only made her smile wider and her confidence stronger. She would be known far and wide for her chapeaus, perhaps to the point that women far and wide would commission her to create the latest fashions for them. Perhaps she could open a shop in London right next to Madame Trudeau in London and she and the well-known dressmaker would become great friends as they sent clients to each other.
Alice giggled at her own foolery, but it was nice to dream. It had been so long since she had taken on the habit of daydreaming of her future. Too often she had been caught up in the past, which brought down her mood significantly. However, being in love tended to make one that much excited to live one’s life, did it not?
The bank came into view, and Alice felt a bit of relief. Johnathan was not outside, which meant that he had already gone inside to make the deposit. If he had realized his mistake by this time, she would have passed him on the street. A small alleyway ran between the bank and the draper’s, and Alice waved at Mr. Johnson through the window as the man worked on a window display to show off his latest wares. He had a new aqua colored ribbon that Alice knew she must have, and she planned to stop by and inquire about it after giving Johnathan the money.
The sound of people talking brought her attention to the alleyway, and what she saw made her stomach reel. When she recognized Johnathan, she hurried to just around the corner next to the draper’s and peeked around, for he was standing with a woman in a rich, blue gown cut low to expose a great amount of bosom. Her face was much like a beautiful doll, and the dark hair that came down in ringlets about her face only enhanced her perfect, alabaster skin.
“Jane, you need to know…” Johnathan was saying. No, this was not just another woman. This was Jane, the woman Johnathan had loved before, and Alice fought to hold back the tears. The woman said something, but Alice was unable to hear what it was, and before she could turn away, the two were kissing.
It was as if the world had come crashing down around Alice as she pushed away from the wall and ran away from the horrible vision that would be burned into her mind from this day forward. All this time, she thought he had changed, or that she had mistaken the rumors and gossip as truth. However, they had all been true. A wave of humiliation at being tricked by the horrible rogue flooded over her as the tears ran down her cheeks. She ran all the way back to the shop, glad that this time she had a clear path, and fumbled to get the key in the lock. How could she have been such a fool? Johnathan had kissed her not half an hour earlier, and now he was kissing another woman—the woman he truly loved. It was clear she returned his affections, for she had returned to find him. Or had she already been in the area the entire time? Had it all been a ruse so Johnathan could get what he wanted from Alice’s father and then turn to Jane to meet his physical needs?
Alice flung herself onto her bed and looked up at the ceiling. The idea of a woman seeking a man only to meet his physical needs made no sense, especially if she was who the man preferred. Plus, what woman would seek to be a mistress rather than a wife, especially to a titled man? Yet, how could she know the mind of such a woman who would kiss another woman’s fiancé, even if the situation was that of a marriage of convenience?
The tears now flowed freely and she found her mind returning to Thomas. However, the truth was, this woman Jane had done what Thomas had not—she had returned to the man she loved. Had Thomas not loved her just as much as Jane loved Johnathan?
Alice could not help but feel even more foolish. Her father had told her on many occasions that she had not a single wit about her, and she had thought he had lied. However, now she wondered if he had seen her as she truly was. A fool. Only a fool would fall for the charms of a rogue and believe the lies that fell from his lips. How he had baited her with talks about the ocean. His smile and his gentlemanly ways of playing her much like a puppeteer would a puppet. She had no one to blame but herself. Her father was right; she was a fool.
A knock came to the door, but Alice sat silently on the bed. She did not wish to see Johnathan at that moment. She needed time to think. The sadness she felt began to dissipate, replaced by an anger that descended upon her like darkness in the night sky. No one made a mockery of her, not even an earl. She would have her revenge, though she did not yet have a plan. The idea of running away again was out of the question; she did not have the money nor anywhere to go. Besides, she was sick of running, for it solved no problems, but rather only made them worse.
She lit a candle and closed the door between the shop and her living quarters to keep the light from being seen from the outside. She did not wish to see Johnathan anytime soon.
Johnathan would not know that she had seen him with Jane; that was the first of her plan. For a moment she considered speaking to several of the sailors she had befriended to see if they could take Johnathan and Jane on one of their ships and take them far away so the two lovers could be together—far away from her. However, the thought was just a flight of fancy. She could not approve of kidnapping, regardless of the circumstances. But it did make her smile for a short time.
Frustrated, she poured herself a cup of tea and sat at the small kitchen table. She had to think logically. What would be th
e best way to get her revenge? What was it that Johnathan loved and desired most? Besides Jane, of course, for he already had her. No, it had to be something else, something she could somehow sabotage.
Then a smile came to her face as an idea came to mind. Of course. She scolded herself for not thinking of it sooner. As she sipped at her tea, a plan began to form. Granted, the details were small at this point, but at least she had a point at which to start.
She would marry him, become his wife, and then she could carry out her plan right after. The one thing, besides Jane, he wanted more in life was money. So, as his wife, she would relieve him of as much of it as she could. She would purchase the finest dresses and gowns, a carriage—no two!—, jewels, whatever her heart desired. Then, when he wanted into her bedroom, she would use that to get him to agree to allow her to be a part of his businesses.
Yes, she had a new dream in life: to destroy Lord Johnathan Blackmoore, Earl of Lidenburg. And she knew she had the plan to do it.
***
Sally poured the tea and took a seat across from Alice. “I’m so sorry,” Sally said with a shake to her head. When Sally had come by for a visit just over an hour earlier, Alice had been unsure whether she would open the door in fear it would be Johnathan, but when Sally had called out to her, Alice had welcomed the opportunity to have someone in whom she could confide.
Johnathan himself had been by several times this day, but Alice had remained silent in her room until he left. She did not want to see him just yet, the pain was much too great, and she also needed the time to perfect her plan.
“Why would a man want to hurt you?” Sally asked as she sipped her tea. “You are the kindest woman I know.” Alice had spent the last hour telling the woman everything, from how her father and Johnathan had concocted their agreement to Johnathan convincing her he cared for her, even if he did not. It was a great relief to have someone in whom she could confide for the first time in a very long time. It had never occurred to her how very much alone she was in St. Mawes until that moment.
“I appreciate you saying so,” Alice said with a smile as she dabbed at the corner of her eye. She could not continue with the depressive conversation even a moment longer. “But enough about me,” she said in a cheerful voice. “What of you and Patrick? When is the wedding?”
Sally’s smile widened considerably. “We have decided to wait until next summer so Patrick can save up enough money for us to find a place to live. Plus, he’s sailing out come Monday and will be gone for at least a month.” Her face fell as she looked down into her teacup. “That will be one thing I won’t be able to get used to—these long trips away.”
Alice nodded. “I imagine it will be difficult,” she said. Then a thought occurred to her. “I have the most wonderful of ideas!”
“Oh? And what would that be? Do you think I should stow away on his ship when he leaves?”
This made Alice laugh. “No, of course not,” she replied. “As it is, I will be in need of more than a lady’s maid. As Johnathan will be gone quite often on business trips, and I will be left at home with the worst of headaches,” —she placed her wrist on her forehead in a most dramatical manner— “I will be in need of a companion. I refuse to stay cooped up indoors, and of course, traveling alone would be out of the question. However, if I have a companion, there will be no reason for me to stay home.” She grabbed Sally’s hand. “What do you say? Travel with me. Help me spend my new husband’s money!”
Rather than be excited as Alice had hoped, Sally appeared indecisive. “I don’t know. I would like the idea, but what of Patrick? He won’t be at sea all the time.”
Alice waved off the woman’s fears. “He will be off with work. Come with me to Exeter and help me prepare for my wedding. Once I am wed, we will return to Cornwall to live at Cliff Heights House. You will have your cottage still; there is no need for you to be with me constantly. That way, when Patrick is home, you can be with him. However, if he will be gone for the next month, what do you have to lose? We can make it an adventure! It will be the grandest—and most expensive—wedding England has ever seen.” She looked pleadingly at Sally. “Please, say you will come.”
Sally laughed. “It’s no wonder you get what you want,” she said. “Fine, I will go with you. I will tell Patrick this evening.” She was practically beaming. “This is so exciting! Thank you so much.”
“No,” Alice said as she placed a hand over Sally’s, “thank you. You have become a very good friend. I had no one with whom to share my burdens, and it means the world to me. So, thank you for being here to listen to my woes.” Johnathan could have his Jane and Alice would have her friend Sally by her side. Granted, it was not the same thing exactly, but at least she now had someone.
Sally’s cheeks reddened at Alice’s words. “I’ve never had such a good friend,” she said.
“And neither have I,” Alice replied.
The sounds of the door opening made Alice jump. Drat! She had forgotten to lock the shop door after admitting Sally. And just as she had suspected, Johnathan came walking into the room as if he owned the place.
“There you are,” he said with a smile. “I have been worried sick about you. Last night I stopped by after my meeting, but you did not answer the door.” Alice held back the urge to strangle the man for his blatant lies. Her anger made it difficult for her to respond, but thankfully, Sally spoke up.
“Oh, I’m sorry, My Lord,” Sally said as she stood to give Johnathan a curtsy, “Miss Huntington was with me. I’m afraid I had a…delicate matter I wished to discuss with her.” Alice was impressed with the slight blush the woman was able to bring to her cheeks.
“Yes, I was with Sally until quite late last night, so rather than traveling back here on my own, she invited me to stay with her.”
Johnathan nodded in approval. “Very wise. I hope you were able to resolve your…issues?”
“Yes, My Lord.”
“Oh, yes, and by the way,” Alice said, “I have asked Sally to not only be my lady’s maid but also my companion.”
“Companion?” Johnathan asked, confusion riddling his face. “Why on Earth would you need a companion?”
“Well, what will I do while you are away on business and I wish to come to St. Mawes to conduct business? Would you not feel better if I were to have someone with whom I can travel between Exeter and Cliff Heights House? Plus, she will be able to accompany me back to Exeter to arrange everything for the wedding.”
Johnathan stared at her. “I had assumed we would travel back together.”
Alice laughed. “Oh, Johnathan! How would it look if we were to arrive together, unchaperoned? Granted, we have been unchaperoned all this time, but that can be easily be kept secret.” She took his hand in hers, though it sickened her to do so. “What has happened between us here must not be made public,” she assured him. “You are an earl; thus, you have a reputation to uphold. If word got out about our time here, the rumors would only multiply and turn into us sharing the same bed rather than simply working together to ready this shop.”
Johnathan seemed to consider her words. When he smiled, Alice felt those familiar stirrings, but she pushed them aside. She would no longer be fooled by this man, or his smiles. “You are so right, my dear,” he said.
“I am so happy you approve!” she said. “However, if she is to be my companion, she will need a whole new wardrobe.” When Johnathan gave her a blank stare, she almost laughed. “Johnathan, dear, if she is to be seen with me, she cannot dress as she does now,” she quickly glanced over at Sally, “No offense, of course.”
“Oh, none taken,” Sally said, clearly attempting to cover a laugh.
“You must agree that she will need a whole new wardrobe, new shoes, gloves, everything. I will also need to see she sees Mrs. Page for the necessary accessories…”
Johnathan put up his hand. “You have convinced me,” he said with a chuckle as he pulled out a large wad of notes and counted them out on the table. “This shoul
d be more than sufficient to get what you need.”
“Wonderful!” Alice said with glee. “We will begin first thing in the morning tomorrow. I am so excited.” She patted Sally’s hand.
Johnathan cleared his throat. “May I speak with you in private?” he asked, giving Sally a pointed look.
Sally stood. “My Lord. My Lady.” She gave them a curtsy. “I will return tomorrow morning at nine, if that will be all right.”
“Perfect,” Alice said as she rose to walk Sally to the door. Once they were alone, she hugged her friend. “Thank you,” she whispered. “We will have so much fun!”
“Are you sure this isn’t too much?” Sally asked with a quick glance toward the back room. “What I mean is…it was one thing for you to spend money on yourself, but I didn’t expect you to do the same for me.”
“Do not worry,” Alice assured her. “I did not say anything that was untrue. You will need more appropriate clothing as a companion. I just happen to have higher standards than most.”
Sally glanced down at her dress. “Well, I guess this definitely isn’t worthy of any great household even for a scullery maid,” she said with a laugh. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow then.”
Alice closed the door behind Sally and then stood in an attempt to steel herself before facing Johnathan on her own. It was one thing to be strong when she had a friend beside her, but quite another when she was alone with the man.
When she returned to her living quarters, Johnathan was pacing the short expanse of the room. “I had thought we were going to speak to Mr. Bancroft concerning the rent here,” he said with a trace of frustration in his voice.
Alice waved off his words and went to collect the kettle to refill the teapot. “We can see him later in the afternoon. I think it imperative that my companion be ready to escort me back to Exeter, and you know how long women’s clothing can take.”
The Spinsters Secret Page 17