by Jake Bible
“Like a goddamn bee sting,” she replied as she took two shots of bourbon then raised her eyebrows at me. “You drinking or what?”
“I am,” I said and matched her two shots.
“That was fun,” Lassa said and we all looked at him. He tapped the side of his nose. “What? I knew no one was going to die. Homicide has a stink to it.” He winked at Violete. “You, my lady, do not stink.”
Violete tipped her head back and laughed. There were more shots done.
26.
MORNING CAME FAST and early. We got maybe two hours sleep before Violete was tapping my cheek with one of her barbs. Sans poison, luckily.
I woke up with a bitch of a headache from the bourbon and the after-effects of the poison. I needed a little more than baking soda to get patched up. Violete had torn the shit out of my gut. Good thing she had Elias. The centaur really was a wiz with the healing.
He had stitched me up, wrapped my torso in bandages with a thick compress of baking soda and something that smelled like rotten eggs, then patted me on the shoulder and poured more shots. The night went on.
“Hey. You didn’t murder me in my sleep,” I said as I pried my gummy eyes open and smiled at Violete. I sat up in the booth I’d chosen to bed down in and looked around. “Thanks for that.”
“That would be the most dishonorable way to kill an opponent. And we are no longer opponents,” Violete said as she sat down, bumping me over with her hip.
“What time is it?”
“Eight. Don’t worry, you’ll get to sleep some more later. Right now we need to talk.”
“Sleep more later? We should get on the road.”
“Not yet.” She nodded over at the corner booth where Diane slept in Lassa’s arms. “Vampires aren’t much use in the daylight. We’ll need her.”
I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and looked around. Teddy was passed out across a table and Elias was busy cleaning up the top of the bar, which was covered in shot glasses, empty pint glasses, and discarded bottles of booze.
“Where’s everyone else?” I asked seeing that none of the spectators was around. “Maaike?”
“Here,” she said as she came out of the kitchen, plates of food balanced on her arms, and a cup of coffee in each hand.
“Thems some fine waitressing skills,” I said as she set everything down on the table.
“Did it for most of eternity,” she said as she walked over to the bar where Elias handed her a third cup of coffee and a handful of silverware. She returned, sat down across from me and Violete and tossed me a napkin-wrapped fork, spoon, and knife. “Eat up, Lawter. You’ll want your strength.”
I didn’t argue as I pulled a plate piled with scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, and toast over to me.
“Thanks,” I said and dug in.
The women watched me until I’d finished that plate and glanced at the other full ones.
“They’re all for you,” Maaike said. “I ate.”
“And I have different tastes,” Violete said.
My fork paused on the way to my mouth. “Which would mean what?”
“My tastes are different,” she replied with a laugh. “You aren’t on the menu. Relax, Chase. I thought after last night we were good.”
“We are, we are,” I said. “But trust isn’t my superpower. Far from it.”
“You trust your friends,” Maaike said. “The bond glows bright between you.”
“Literally?” I asked.
“To those that can see such things,” she said.
“Valkyries can?”
“Valkyries can. We transport and serve the most worthy of warriors in Valhalla. Bonds like yours are what light up the Great Hall.”
“Good to know,” I said and continued eating.
Third plate empty and I leaned back with a sigh. I waved my hand at the table. “How?” I asked. “I’m getting full, but I can eat ten times that amount after the Dim work I did last night.”
“Valkyries serve warriors,” Maaike said. “Warriors eat and drink a lot. We’d be on our feet all night if what we served did not satisfy. I’m all about hard work, but a girl needs a smoke break now and again.”
I laughed and sipped my coffee.
The woman’s bathroom door kicked open and Harper came out, zipping her fly and buckling her belt.
“Now, that is how you start a morning,” she said then saw me. “Good. You’re awake. Let’s figure out how we get back to Asheville in one piece.”
“Are we going to Asheville?” I asked. “That’s what the One Guy wants. Maybe we sneak into DC and leave him on the DEX’s doorstep. Let them have him and then we go back home.”
“Screw what the One Guy wants, going home is what I want,” Harper said. “Get back on our home turf where we have allies.”
“And legal representation,” I said, quickly seeing her point. Not that I wanted to go into the heart of the magical insanity that DC was anyway. I nodded in agreement. “Nothing like a law firm of banshees having your back to make you sleep well at night.”
“Don’t say that in front of Sharon,” Harper said. “She’d split her spleen worrying about the cost.”
“She does that anyway.”
“True.”
“Can you keep your voices down?” Lassa grumbled. “Too loud.”
“Sorry, pal. We’ll put everything on hold so you can sleep more,” I said as Harper joined us, sitting next to Maaike.
“Thanks,” Lassa replied, but he was already snoring a second after the word left his lips.
I froze. Everything had been so hunky dory that I missed a very important element.
“Uh, where’s the One Guy?” I asked.
“I stuck him in the freezer,” Maaike said. “He’s secure.”
“Alive secure?” I asked.
“Alive. Chilly, but he’ll be fine,” she replied and leaned on the table. “Do you have any idea how hexed up he is? There are so many layers upon layers of paranoia built into him that I had a hard time disentangling all of them. I didn’t even come close to getting to the bottom of his protections. That man is ready for almost anything that can be thrown at him.”
“Except for blood ghasts,” Violete said. “The only hexes that work on them are to summon and banish. Nothing else.”
“Which is why all the scumbags across the country are using them to take each other out,” I said. “Right. Got that part. So, what are we going to do about them?” I pointed my coffee cup at Harper. “We can’t carve her up for banishment parts.”
“I can spare some,” Harper said.
“Jesus, Harp, no,” I said.
“Chase is right, that’s a no,” Violete said. “A healthy Harper Kyles is a better weapon than a wounded Harper Kyles.”
“Then what’s the solution?” I asked.
“We banish them a different way,” Violete said and wriggled her fingers close to my face. “And not back to where they came from. Somewhere else entirely. Somewhere only you can access.”
“The Dim?” I responded. I set my cup down. “I’m not sure that’s the best idea.”
“And why not?”
“Because I don’t know what will happen. I don’t.” I shrugged. “True story. Dim boxes may not hold them.”
“They hold anything,” Violete said, glancing from Maaike to Harper and back to me. “Or am I missing something?”
“Yeah, lady, you are,” I snapped then patted her arm. “Sorry. Still tired.”
“What am I missing?” Violete asked.
“Your tentacles sliced through the Dim,” I said. “Surprising, but not unheard of. I’ve had shit slice through it before. And that should tell you that the Dim is not impervious.”
“And it takes energy,” Harper said, backing me
up. “Even the boxes that are sent back to the nothing.” She pointed at the plates on the table. “Part of why he has to eat so much.”
“Oh,” Violete said. “I thought once they were banished, they didn’t draw from you.”
“They do. Only a fraction of what an active box does, but they still do,” I said. “The strength I’d need to make a Dim box to hold a blood ghast? Shit. I’m starving again even thinking of it.”
“Huh. All right,” Violete said. “We can’t chop up Ms. Kyles. And you aren’t willing to risk sending them into the Dim.”
“Didn’t say I wasn’t willing,” I countered. “I said I didn’t know what would happen.”
“Semantics,” Violete continued. “Looks like we need another option.”
“We need kobold parts,” Maaike said. “But there is no way we can get those. Even if our black market contacts have some, the cost would be enormous.”
“Wait, what? Black market? What do you mean?” I asked.
“The black market is everywhere, Chase,” Harper said. “Even in places without a Grand Hex. Contraband will always find a way to be bought and sold.”
“I am willing to bet kobold parts are worth a fortune right now,” Maaike said. “All these attacks and the price of a knuckle would have to be astronomical. Damned price gougers.”
Harper’s head whipped about and we locked eyes.
“We have a winner,” Harper said and laughed that cold laugh of hers when she wanted to kill anything and everything in sight, but saw the futility of the homicidal actions at the same time.
“You have got to be kidding me,” I said.
Harper and I obviously came to the same conclusion at the exact same time. Our heads swiveled and looked towards the kitchen and its freezer.
“Goddammit,” I muttered as I got up. “I’ll handle this.”
“Handle what?” Maaike asked.
“You nailed it earlier, sister,” Harper said. “A fortune can be made off kobold parts.”
Maaike glanced towards the kitchen. “You think he has more? I thought the shortage of kobold parts was why he needed a Stolen.”
“Who do you think created that shortage? That son of a bitch. I knew there was more to this. I knew there was another angle,” I said and started walking towards the kitchen. “I’m going to find out how much more he has and where.”
“We will find out together,” Violete said. “Your history is too muddled. He’ll get inside your head.”
“She’s got a point,” Harper said. “He’s good, Chase. The asshole plans for everything. He knew he might be found out. He’ll be prepared. I’ll go chat with him.”
“You aren’t much more removed than Chase. And considerably more deadly. I foresee the One Guy’s death if you go ‘chat’ with him,” Violete said to her. She nodded at Maaike. “Go over the route with Harper. We’ll take everyone here along with Goss and Verber.”
“The twins? You sure?” Maaike asked.
“I wish I wasn’t,” Violete said and got up to follow me.
“Who are Goss and Verber?” Harper asked.
“We’ll get to that,” Maaike said, looking none too pleased at the idea.
“Chase? Let’s go have an unpleasant talk with an unpleasant man,” Violete said as she took me by the arm and led me to the kitchen.
The kitchen was small. Not sure how Lassa had room to cook, let alone to move around.
“The One Guy is in the freezer?” I asked, looking about for a walk-in, but there was obviously not enough space for one. “Am I missing something?”
Then I saw it. A chest freezer shoved in the corner with old boxes stacked on top. Violete’s tentacles whipped out and moved the boxes then she unlatched the freezer and popped it open.
“Hello,” she said down into the freezer.
I stepped next to her and laughed. It was a good thirty feet deep.
“Nice hex,” I said.
At the bottom, chained to a chair, was the One Guy staring up at us. He had frost covering him, but wasn’t chattering or shivering at all.
“You realized you still need me,” he said with confidence. “Surprise.”
“We need each other,” Violete said. “You need us to transport you back to safety. We need you to give us all the kobold parts you have squirreled away so we can fight off the blood ghasts that will be coming for you.”
“Kobold parts? No idea what you could possibly be talking about,” the One Guy said. “I mean, if I had”—
One of Violete’s tentacles stretched the thirty feet in a blink and gave the One Guy a hard slap across the cheek, the barbed end cutting a thin line in his flesh.
“Ow,” the One Guy said with a smirk. “You know, I have several clients back in Asheville that would pay a premium price for one night with you. You wouldn’t even have to have sex with them. A little rough stuff with those tentacles of yours and you’d be rich as can be.”
Violete glared, but did not respond to his offer.
“No go? A pity.”
“Is there any part of you that isn’t disgusting?” I snarled.
“And you. I didn’t forget about you,” the One Guy said, looking directly at me. “You think you can disentangle from this so easily, that it’ll all be peaches and cream for you? Oh, Chase, they aren’t done with you either.”
“Yay me,” I said as I spat a loogie down on his head.
“You asshole!” he yelled. “What the hell?”
“Yeah, no magic torture from me, pal,” I said. “I’m gonna spit and piss and drop all kinds of shit, probably even literal shit, down on you until you stop being a prick and realize you got yourself in as deep as you got us.”
“I know,” the One Guy said quietly.
I looked about the kitchen.
“What?” Violete asked.
“Waiting for the chorus of angels to arrive,” I said. “Leonard Maguire admitted to something. That has to prove the existence of God.”
“Funny, Chase. Very funny,” the One Guy yelled up at us. “But I didn’t live this long because I’m stupid. I’ve been working all the angles of how I get out of this and they all lead back to me making a phone call.”
He shifted his focus to Violete. “What time are we getting on the road?”
“As soon as the sun goes down,” she replied.
“You must be bringing the vampire.”
“Among others, yes.”
He scrunched up his ugly face then nodded.
“I’m gonna lose a ton of money, but this was always a gamble,” he said finally. “I can get them here on time. Or close. They might have to meet us on the road.”
“You want us to tell some outside party what route we’re taking?” I laughed. “Leonard, you crazy.”
“It isn’t an issue,” Violete said. “We’ll be taking the interstate the whole way.”
“We what now?” I asked. “You said for Maaike to plan the route with Harper.”
“That was to distract Harper from killing the One Guy,” Violete replied. “It worked.”
“So you already have a route planned? And that route is the interstate?” I asked. “You crazy like Leonard.”
“We need this out in the open, Chase,” she explained. “The DEX will be forced to keep back or risk a dark highway of drivers being exposed to the realities of the new world.”
I smirked. “Yeah. Okay. Let’s see what shit happens.”
“Yes. Let’s,” Violete said.
“Gonna pull me up or what?” the One Guy called to us. “Gotta make that phone call ASAP or no kobold parts.”
27.
“WE KNOW OUR roles?” Violete asked all of us as we stood in the twilight lit parking lot.
“Goss and Verber drive,” Maa
ike said, pointing to the two men that stood next to the cab of the box truck we’d be using as our way home. “No fighting for them unless we get into a fight that is hard to handle. Last resort only.”
I leaned close to Harper and whispered, “What are they again?”
“Dullahan,” she whispered back. “Headless horsemen.”
“Sleepy Hollow shit?”
“Worse. Way worse.”
“Lovely.”
“Lassa is in the cab with them to take the wheel if they are needed,” Maaike continued.
“Hi,” Lassa said and raised a hand as he bowed to everyone. Diane giggled.
“I’ll be on top with Diane. The roof is lowered and sides raised so we have a perch up there,” Maaike said. “Harper and Chase are inside the back with Violete, Elias, Teddy, and the One Guy. Use the side ports if you need to.”
Elias and Teddy climbed up into the back of the truck and opened side panels to demonstrate. They pulled shotguns free from hooks under the panels and stuck them through the ports.
“Not my first rodeo,” Harper said. “But thanks for the demo.”
“Violete will be watching the One Guy,” Maaike said. “If he needs to banish some blood ghasts then she will make sure he does so without any trickery.”
The One Guy yawned.
“Chase and Harper? You are last resort also,” Maaike said. “Keep your eyes on the One Guy.”
“All of this for little ol’ me?” the One Guy said.
“We do not stop,” Maaike said, ignoring him. “No piss breaks. No gas ups. No snacks. We drive straight through to Asheville. Once there we have worked out neutral ground where everyone can go their separate ways.”
“Any hints?” I asked. “Hard to find neutral ground with our histories.”
“I found it and I’ll let you know when we’re there,” Maaike replied. She glared at the One Guy. “Wouldn’t want someone to tip off his people and complicate things.”
“Then what?” the One Guy asked. “The mess is still the mess.”
“Your mess,” Violete said. “We’ve been asked to escort you back, which we will do for a fair price to be paid when we need it.” She looked at me and Harper. We nodded. She returned her attention to the One Guy. “You’re a big boy. Take care of your own fuckups.”