by Caitlyn Dare
The door slams behind me, and I fall back against it.
Not a second later does Cole’s bedroom door open and a blonde head pokes out.
“Is she okay?” Hadley asks, concern for Kennedy pulling her brows together.
“Fuck knows,” I spit. Some people might be affected by the harshness of my tone, but not Hadley. She knows me, or more so Cole, better than to be threatened by us. She’s the bravest fucking girl I know.
“You just need to give her some time, some space.”
I lift my hands to my hair and pull until it hurts. I don’t want to give Kenny those things. I want to pull her into my arms and tell her that it’s going to be okay, that all she needs to do is tell me the truth and I’ll make sure that motherfucker isn’t able to touch her, or another woman, ever again.
I trusted that fucker with her. Kenny was the single most important person in my life aside from my brothers, and I trusted him with her.
What a fucking idiot I was.
"I don't fucking want..." My words trail off as Hadley's eyes soften.
"I know, Con." She reaches out and gently pulls my arms down before taking my hands. "I know you want to fix things... her. But you can't. Not as easily as you think you can. Just do as she says, let her heal, then maybe she'll be more willing to let you in."
I stare into Hadley's eyes, I want to believe what she's saying, that Kenny will open up once she's feeling better, but something tells me that this isn't going to be as easy as that.
The Kenny lying in my bed right now is different from the girl I remember. The light and sparkle that was once in her eyes has gone. I fucking hate it, and I know he's the reason.
Thoughts of him have my grip on Hadley tightening.
"You should go back in there." I nod to the door she appeared from.
"Things might be okay with Cole and me now, Conner. But that doesn't mean I'm no longer your friend."
"I-I know," I manage to get out through the emotion clogging my throat.
"Why don't you go and get some air. You've been standing out here all day. Get something to eat, maybe. I know you haven’t had anything yet. Ellen made cookies," she sings. And while I can't deny that they sound tempting, the last thing I want to do right now is eat cookies and pretend like everything is okay, because it's fucking not. Nothing is okay while my girl is laying battered and broken in my bed and I'm not beside her.
"Hads?"
"Yeah?"
"Will you try to talk to her? See if you can get through to her? I need to know if what I fear happened actually did happen."
"I can try. But if she doesn't want you to know, then you need to respect that."
Releasing her hands, I spin away from her. I might know that she's right but that doesn't mean I need to accept it.
Looking at my bedroom door once more, I do something that I haven’t done since I first brought her up here however many hours ago. I walk away.
The second my feet hit the ground floor my arm flies out, knocking the vase and full bouquet of flowers from the top of the dresser. The vase smashes as water splashes everything.
Watching the pieces clatter to the ground doesn't make me feel any better.
"What the hell was..." Ace comes to a stop when he sees me standing there with my chest heaving. "You need to calm down."
"Don't fucking tell me what to do," I bark, taking a step toward him, not stopping until my chest is brushing his.
He doesn't so much as flinch as he waits for me to take out my frustration on him.
"Conner. My office. Now!" A booming voice fills the silence around us as Ace continues to hold my eyes, daring me to do my worst. "Conner?" James says again, finally breaking through my haze.
I take a step around Ace, whose concerned eyes follow me, but I don't look back. Instead, I start up the main staircase, storming toward James and letting myself into his office.
By the time he follows me in, I've fallen down on his couch with my legs stretched out before me and my head resting back on the cushion as I stare at the ceiling.
Dad closes the door before coming to join me. He doesn't say anything, but I know he's looking at me. His attention burns my skin.
"Talk to me, Son."
"Nothing to say."
He lets out a frustrated sigh. "Okay, let's do this a different way. Who is she?"
I think for a few seconds, the silence stretching out between us. "She's... she's everything."
"Okay."
I keep my eyes on the ceiling as words start to tumble from my mouth. I have no idea if he wants to know what I've got to say, but now I've started, I can’t stop.
"She's been my best friend for... well, forever. We met in pre-K, and until I moved here, well..." I trail off, not really needing to say the words. "She's got a boyfriend. Warren.” Warren Kraven. His name is like ash on my tongue. “He was our friend too. They got together a few months before we moved here. I thought she was safe."
"You're saying he did this?"
Dragging my head from the cushion, I stare into my father's eyes. "Yes."
"And you know that for a fact?"
"Well... no, but—"
"You can't start accusing him—going after him—without any evidence, Son."
"Who said I was going to..." His brow lifts in accusation, and I trail off. "I won't let him get away with this."
"I'm not suggesting we do. But you need to know for sure first."
"She said it was a random attack. She's lying."
"What makes you think that?"
"That fact that I know her better than I know myself."
James nods, accepting my words. "No man should ever hit a woman. You get me the evidence, and it'll get sorted."
I narrow my eyes at him, wondering who the fuck our father really is. We were under the impression he was just a businessman, but as time goes on, he only seems to get a shit ton more complex.
"What do you want to do now?"
"Now?"
"Well, I'm assuming you don't want to send her back?"
"Fucking right I don't."
"Does she have any family?"
"Just an aunt, but she's clearly doing a shit job of looking after her."
"Okay, so should I call social services or..."
"No, she stays here."
James leans forward, his elbows on his knees, his fingers steepled. "Here?"
"I mean, yeah... no... I don't know. But she's not going into the system, and she's not going back there. That's all I know."
"When is she eighteen?"
"Next month."
He nods.
"Why? What are you thinking?"
"Leave it with me.” A faint smile traces his lips. “I have some favors to pull."
"What does that mean exactly?"
"It means exactly what I said. Leave it with me."
"So now what?"
He shrugs. "You said you know her better than anyone, so I guess only you know the answer."
He pushes from the couch, pulls his cell from his pocket, and has it to his ear before walking from the room, leaving me surrounded by his walnut office furniture and fancy fucking books.
Needing to get out of the room, I follow his lead, but not before a bottle of amber liquid catches my attention on one of his shelves.
"Fuck it," I mutter, swiping it from its place. If it's hidden up here then it's got to be the good stuff.
As I hit the bottom of the stairs, I glance to my right. It would be so easy to march back up there and demand she talk to me, but I know it's not going to get me anywhere. I wasn't lying when I said I know her, and one thing I know is that she's a stubborn ass.
With the bottle in my hand, I make my way out the front door before dropping down onto one of the stone steps.
I twist the top and lift the glass to my lips. The first shot burns, but I instantly know that this isn't cheap stuff. It's so fucking smooth.
Pulling the bottle back, I look at the label. It's Macallan, but other th
an knowing it's expensive shit, I don't know much more about it. We didn't often find bottles of the good stuff lying around in the Heights.
I have no idea how long I sit there watching the sun go down, sinking into the ocean on the horizon, but my ass is numb and my head is spinning.
I was hoping that the whisky might have helped to remove the images my imagination have been conjuring up since I pulled Kenny into my arms when Jay first dropped her off. The thought of him touching her, hurting her...
My teeth grind and my grip on the bottle tightens with my need to go and find the motherfucker and teach him a lesson of my own.
But James is right. I need to know for sure it was him.
I assume that no one knows I'm here, so when the front door opens and Hadley steps out as if she's expecting to see me, I wonder just how good my hiding spot was.
I should have gone down to the beach, but I didn't want to go that far away in case she needs me.
A sad laugh rips from my lips. She doesn't need you. She doesn't even want you near her.
I tip the bottle to my mouth once more.
"Whoa, where did you get that?"
"James' office."
"Do you know how much a bottle like that costs?"
I shrug. "Don't care. How is she?"
"Hurting. Scared… lost."
I blow out a frustrated breath.
"It's going to take time, Conner."
"I don't want fucking time," I slur. "I just want..."
"I know, Con. Do you want to talk about her?"
I shake my head. I can't let myself go back there. I can't allow myself to think that we could ever be a possibility. She didn't want me back then, so why should I think now is any different?
"This is all my fault," I admit.
"How? This isn't on you, Con."
"I pushed her to him."
"What?"
“I…” I drop my head into my hands as I remember the day I told her she should give Warren a chance as clearly as if it were yesterday. It just so happens to be the day she crushed my heart and ruined me for anyone else.
"Did she say anything else? What happened? What he did?"
I glance over just in time to see a guilty look spread across her face. "Tell me, Hads. Please."
"Conner," she says, reaching out and taking my hand in hers. "I can't. What she told me, she told me in confidence. She needs friends right now, not more people she can't trust. You just need to—"
"Give her time," I mutter to myself. "I know, you said that already."
"It's the only thing you can do. You push too hard, and you might lose her for good. You want to help her, you need to do as she asks."
I blow out a long breath. "Well, you were a lot of fucking help," I grumble. It's meant to come out lighthearted, but from the pained expression on Hadley’s face, I fear I might have missed the mark.
"You need to sleep that off," she says, standing and plucking the almost empty bottle hanging from my hand.
"I would if I didn't have a girl in my bed who doesn’t even want to look at me."
She opens her mouth to respond, but I beat her to it. "Don't say it, Hads. Don't say it."
She gives me a small smile before slipping back inside the house, leaving me alone once again with my imagination, guilt, and anger.
Chapter Three
Kennedy
I feel like an exhibit at a zoo. First the doctor, then Conner and Remi. Then another girl called Hadley tried to talk to me. She knew my secret. I don’t know if Remi told her or she could just sense it, but I saw the sympathy in her eyes, the understanding.
It didn’t make me want to open up, though.
It made me want to crawl under the bed sheets and never resurface.
I don’t want to be here.
I don’t want to be here, and yet I have nowhere else to go.
That’s what my life has come to.
I turn my head and take a shuddering breath. What I really want is a hot shower and some clean clothes, but it’s late, and my body is beginning to shut down.
When I hear another knock at the door I brace myself for Conner’s face, but it isn’t Conner at all.
It’s his father.
James Jagger.
The guy who takes in waifs and strays like he’s the Pied Piper of Sterling Bay.
“Can we talk?”
“It’s your house.” I shrug as he slips inside.
The door clicks shut, the sound reverberating through me.
“I debated giving you some more time, but I figured I should probably introduce myself. I’m—”
“James, yeah. I know who you are.” It comes out cold, but he remains unaffected. I suppose moving Ace, Cole, and Conner into his house and revealing that he was their father instead of the piece of shit they grew up with had toughened his skin.
The Jagger brothers aren’t exactly an easy bunch to win over.
“Conner tells me the two of you are friends.”
“Were,” I correct. “We were friends.”
“You live with your aunt in the Heights?”
My jaw clenches as I try to swallow down the flash of pain. “She, uh... she died. Right before the summer.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. Where do you live now?” My brows furrow, and he smiles. “Sorry, I don’t mean to question you like this. I’m just concerned. You’re a minor still, Kennedy, and I want to know you’re safe.”
“I live with my boyfriend and his dad.”
“I see.” His expression hardens.
“Are you going to call the authorities?” My hands twist together in my lap.
“I would prefer not to.”
“Why?”
“Because my son cares about you, and I made a promise to do right by them.”
“What does that mean?” My voice quivers.
“It means you can stay here for as long as you need to.”
“I can’t stay here,” I blurt out.
“I thought you might say that. What will you do? Go back to Warren?” His brow lifts, but I don’t find any judgement there, only sympathy and pity I don’t want to see.
“I... no, I don’t know.”
“I know you told Conner you were attacked, but we’ve had our fair share of family drama over the last few months not to recognize a cry for help.”
“I’m not... that’s not what this is. I didn’t ask Jay to bring me here.”
“Kennedy,” he lets out a soft sigh, raking his fingers through his salt and pepper hair, “that’s not what I mean.”
“O-oh.” I hate that I sound so weak, but despite not wanting to stay here, I know that I can’t go back to Warren. Not after what he did. I’d rather run. I’d rather pack a bag and take off.
“Look, I sense there is a story there between you and my son. That is yours to tell, so I won’t push you for the details. But I also won’t send you back to the Heights until I’m confident you have a safe place to stay. I spoke to a couple of friends, and there’s another option, if you want to hear it?”
Hesitating, I stare at him. Then I whisper, “Okay.”
“Hadley, Cole’s girlfriend, boards up at the school. There’s a spare room in her dorm building. It’s yours if you want it. Principal Vager is willing to talk to Sterling Heights High to see if you have enough credits to graduate high school. If you do, you can transfer, finish classes at Sterling Prep, and graduate in May.”
“You managed to organize all that in less than a day?” Disbelief coats my words.
“I have... connections,” he says cryptically.
Connections and a fat check book.
“Why?”
“Because I’ve made enough mistakes with my boys. I won’t make the same mistake twice,” he says as if it’s that simple.
Everyone had heard the recent rumors that Conner and his brothers were in fact James’ kids, but none of us know the history there. I know the boys suffered at the hands of their mom, though, and although it devastated me when
Conner left, I can already see he’s better off here.
“I can really stay at the school?” I ask, hardly able to believe what he’s telling me. But then reality crashes over me.
I can’t go to Sterling Prep. I’m not like the kids who go there. I’m not rich. I don’t drive an expensive car or wear the best designers. Unless I try and sneak into Warren’s and get my stuff, I have nothing but the clothes folded neatly on the chair.
I’m from the Heights, where life is hard and you do what you gotta do to survive.
There’s no way I can go to Sterling Prep, no matter how tempting his offer is. Besides, Conner will be there. It’ll mean seeing him day in, day out.
“It’s a lot to process. Why don’t you take some time to think about it.” James gets up and moves to the door.
“Wait,” I call after him. “What happens if I say no?”
“You’re a minor, Kennedy.”
It’s a threat.
One I don’t need explaining.
He’s prepared to help me, but if I choose not to accept his offer, he won’t hesitate to call the authorities.
Fuck.
“Get some rest. We’ll talk again soon.” He slips out of the room, and, once again, I’m alone.
I know James means well, but he doesn’t understand the consequences for a girl like me to attend a place like Sterling Prep. Besides, Warren won’t just cut me loose. He’ll come for me eventually.
But I can’t deny that no matter how much I would rather not be here, it’s the safest I’ve felt in weeks. Warren is volatile and possessive. I never know which version of him I’m going to get. It’s exhausting, constantly living on edge, waiting for his barbed words and cruel touch.
Maybe staying in Sterling Bay is the better option.
But as I close my eyes and Conner’s face fills my mind, I know I’d only be trading one nightmare for another.
I jolt from a restless sleep. My breath hitches at the sight of Conner standing over me.
“Kenny,” he slurs. “You’re awake.”
“Yeah, asshole, because you woke me.”
“I just needed... shit, babe.” He lets out a small breath and the bitter scent of liquor invades my senses.