by Caitlyn Dare
"Hell yeah, I am."
"Oh God." A ripple of pleasure rushes through her entire body. "I could die a very happy girl right now," she whispers.
"Well, don't, please. We've got so much more of this to come.”
"Where are you going?" I ask when Kenny swings her legs from the edge of her bed. I refused to let her up once I came inside her again, and we've spent the past thirty minutes making out like teenagers as we roll around on my bed.
I'm beyond hard for her again—obviously—but I think she probably deserves a bit of a break.
"The bathroom, Con. Don't look so worried." Reaching back, she runs her fingers over my cheek, her eyes softening. "I'll be right back."
"Okay."
When she does return, I'm sitting up in bed, the sheets pooled around my waist and the TV on.
"I thought we could watch a movie, dive into the snacks."
"You're hungry? Of course you are," she mutters, reaching down to grab one of my discarded shirts and pulling it over her head.
"You look hot in my clothes, K."
She smiles, but something on my desk catches her eye. When I follow her stare, my stomach drops.
Plucking the envelopes from their hiding place, she holds them up to me.
"Shouldn't you have sent these already?"
I swallow down my anxiety. "Yeah, but I haven't. Whatever. Come back to bed, babe," I say in the hope it puts an end to the conversation.
"Nice try. Why haven't you sent them?" Excuses balance on the tip of my tongue, but I know she'd see right through them. "Con, there are some incredible colleges here. They'd be lucky to have you."
"Hmm... seriously, come here. I miss you." Pushing the sheets lower in the hope my body will tempt her, I wait for her to decide.
Thankfully, she puts them back where she found them, but it seems it's not the end of the conversation.
"What are you scared of?" she asks, coming to lay in front of me, her hypnotizing eyes staring into mine.
"I—" The emotion in my throat cuts off my words. "I don't know what I want. It's a big decision, potentially a big move. I just... don't know."
She smiles at me softly. "You don't think that's how everyone is feeling right now?"
I shrug. "We were never meant to have these kinds of options. I never thought I'd even apply, let alone..." I trail off.
"You deserve this, Conner. You deserve everything your new life can give you. Don't run away from what could be the beginning of the rest of your life. We'll post them tomorrow, together," she states, making my chest ache.
"What about you?" I ask, lacing my arm around her back and pulling her closer so our bodies are pressed together.
"Me? I don't even have a home, Con. You really think I've put any thought into my future?"
"You do have a home," I argue. "Right here is where you belong."
"James might have helped me with school, but I can't expect anything else from him."
"He'll do whatever I ask of him. He owes me. You want to go to college, we'll make it happen."
"I'm not sure it's for me. And I'm sure you don't want me following you like a lost puppy."
"Are you kidding? I would love to go together. We really could make up for lost time then. Get an apartment together. Be like, a real couple."
"You're such a goof," she laughs, wrapping her hand around the back of my neck and brushing her lips against mine.
After a few minutes we both rest our heads on the pillows, our noses only a breath apart.
"Does it hurt?" Kenny asks, running her fingertip over my bruises.
"Not as long as you're touching me." She smiles at me before her face drops.
"What? What's wrong?"
"What really happens now?"
"We finish school and plan our future."
"I'm eighteen in a few weeks, Con." I know what she's worried about, but James isn't going to cut her off just because of her age. What I said earlier is true. He'll help her as long as I ask him to.
"I have no home, no family, no nothing."
"You have a home and a family here. What more could you want?"
She swallows nervously and I hold her tighter. "He's going to come back, you know that, right? His disappearing act, it's not going to last forever."
The image of Warren's dad slumped on his trailer floor hits me.
"What?" Kenny asks, her voice quivering, I have no idea what she can see on my face, but I know I can't keep this from her. I still have no idea if I left him breathing or not.
"I... I think I might have killed his dad."
Chapter Thirty-Three
Kennedy
I stare at Conner, my body vibrating at his words. “You did what?”
“The other night, after we... I went to the Heights. I was so fucking angry, K. I didn’t even think about it, I just acted on impulse. I wanted it to be him. I wanted it to be Warren, but he wasn’t there.”
“Conner...” My heart splinters, my pulse racing dangerously. “We need to call someone. We need to find out if he’s okay.” Panic swells inside me as I scramble off the bed to find my cell phone.
“Fuck,” he murmurs, tugging the ends of his hair. “I fucked up, I’m sorry, I—”
“Shh.” I lift my finger at him as I dial Jay’s number. He answers on the second ring.
“Yeah?”
“Jay, it’s me, Kennedy.”
“Kenny?” Surprise coats his voice. “How are—”
“I need you to do something for me.”
“Okay.”
“Can you go check on Warren’s dad for me? I think he might be hurt...”
“What the fuck?”
“I can’t explain everything right now, but can you do it for me? Please. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.”
“Yeah, yeah, okay. I’ll head over there right now.”
The relief I feel barely touches the dread sitting heavy in my stomach.
“Call me when you get there. And Jay, be careful.”
I hang up, glancing back at Conner. He sits on the edge of the bed, the blood drained from his face.
“Jay is going to go over there.”
“I didn’t mean... I was just...”
“Shh.” I go to him, letting him wrap his arms around my waist. “I’m sure it will be okay.”
“What if it’s not? What if I... killed him?”
My eyes shutter as I inhale a ragged breath. Steeling myself, I gaze down at him, brushing the hair out of his eyes. “Then we’ll figure it out, together.”
“Yeah?” Hope sparkles in his eyes.
“Yeah. It’s you and me, Conner. Nothing will ever change that.”
He pulls me down on his lap, kissing me hard. I feel the tears streak down his cheeks. “I just lost it,” he whispers against my lips. “I just saw red and lost it.”
“Shh.” Touching my brow to his, I stare at his crushed expression. “You should have told me.”
“I know, fuck, I know, but I just... I pushed it down and told myself everything would be okay.”
“We’ll figure it out.” Silence envelops us as we sit there, waiting for Jay to call.
When my cell finally rings, we both startle. My fingers tremble as I bring it to my ear.
“Jay?”
“He’s okay. He’s passed out with a bottle of vodka, and I’m guessing from the fresh sutures and bandages that someone stitched him up. But he’s still breathing. Should I be worried?”
Relief slams into me as I mouth, “he’s okay,” to Conner. “No, but thank you though. Was there any sign of Warren?”
“Nothing, but I told Conner I’d let him know the second we see or hear anything.”
“Okay, thank you.”
“Kenny?” he says just as I’m about to hang up.
“Yeah?”
“Everything is okay, right? Conner isn’t—”
He knows. Jay knows what happened.
Shit.
But he helped me. He helped Conner. He g
ets it.
We can trust him—I hope.
“He’s okay,” I say, admitting nothing aloud. “Thanks again.”
“Anytime.”
We say goodbye and hang up, and I throw my arms around Conner. “He’s okay. He’s okay.”
The next morning, I wake before Conner. He looks so peaceful, lying there. I don’t have the heart to wake him.
Gingerly climbing out of bed, I pull on the pajamas Hadley lent me last night and grab one of Conner’s hoodies before slipping into the hall.
I follow the smell of coffee and pancakes, arriving in the kitchen. “So you’re alive then?” Cole arches a brow, amusement playing on his lips.
“Alive? Why wouldn’t she be alive?”
My heart jumps into my throat at the sight of Mr. Jagger.
“I... uh, good morning.”
Cole silently chuckles and I discreetly flip him off, as his dad acts as if it’s just business as usual.
“Is that son of mine coming down for breakfast?” he asks.
“I... he’s sleeping.”
Wow, this is awkward. I assumed he was out of town again. Sarah too. But here he is, smiling at me knowingly.
“Relax, Kennedy. It’s good to see you here. We’ve all been worried about Conner.” He and Cole share a look.
“He’s okay,” I say. “I think we’re going to be okay.”
“I’m pleased to hear it. Although I’d appreciate it if you could give him a push to send off those college applications before he misses all of the deadlines.”
“I’m working on it.” I accept the mug of coffee Hadley hands me. “Thanks.”
She gives me a warm smile.
“We’re actually going to Colton this weekend to check out some apartments. You guys should come,” she says.
“Yeah?”
“Sounds good to me,” Cole agrees.
“Do you have plans for after graduation, Kennedy?” James asks.
“I haven’t given it much thought.” I can’t afford tuition, and my grades aren’t good enough for a scholarship.
“Well, you should think about it. I imagine Conner will want you close by, whenever he figures out his plan.”
I duck my head, heat creeping into my cheeks.
“Speak of the devil,” Cole says.
I feel Conner before I see him. He wraps an arm around my waist and lowers his mouth to my ear. “You were gone.”
“I needed coffee.” I lift my mug.
“It’s good to see you smiling, Son.”
“Yeah, well, I have a lot to smile about.” He nuzzles my neck, and I elbow him in the stomach.
“Conner, we have company.”
“So?”
“Interesting fact, Dad.” Cole smirks. “Ask Conner how classes were yesterday.”
“Oh dear Lord, what happened now?”
“Trust me, Dad,” Conner says, “you don’t want to know.”
“Please try and avoid stirring anymore trouble with Principal Vager. He already gets enough of my money.”
“At least we’re graduating soon,” Cole says, “and then you’ll be free of us and all the drama that comes with us being here.”
“Cole,” sadness clings to James’ words, “you know I don’t feel like that.”
Hadley catches my eye, and I know I’m not the only who feels like a voyeur looking in on their intimate moment.
“Something smells good.” Ace and Remi enter the kitchen through the back door. They’re already dressed for school.
“Hmm, pancakes?” Remi goes straight for the plate. “Where’s my mom?”
“She’s still sleeping. We had a late night.” James tugs at his collar.
“Whoa, too much information.” Remi balks.
“Thank fuck we’re in the pool house,” Ace grumbles.
“Yes, well... I should probably be going. I have a breakfast meeting. Try and stay out of trouble please.”
“Roger that.” Conner salutes his dad, tucking me into his side as he guides me over to the kitchen island.
James leaves and Cole lets out a heavy sigh. “Is anyone else picturing all kinds of wrong things right now?”
“Do you think my mom is okay?” Remi frowns. “She doesn’t usually miss work.”
“Maybe she can’t walk.” Conner howls with laughter.
“Oh my God, don’t say that.” She gags. “Why would you say that? Now all I can think about is them... doing it.”
“James and Sarah, fucking in a tree... f-u-c-k—”
I clap a hand over Conner’s mouth, fighting a smile. He’s happy this morning, lighter. Hopefully it means we’ve turned a corner. Although as I sit there with my boyfriend’s brothers and their girlfriends, eating breakfast, I can’t help but think it’s the calm before the storm.
Because nothing this good lasts forever.
We manage to stay in school for the whole day. We spend every second we can making out, in the hall up against the locker banks, in the cafeteria to the moans and groans of Cole, Ace, and the girls. Conner even sneaks us into the closet again and makes me come all over his tongue.
Lylah and Marissa and their bitch crew watch us, their lips twisted with disgust. But I ignore them. Nothing is going to spoil this.
Hadley waits for me at the end of the day to walk back to the dorms together.
“Are you excited about the weekend?” she asks me.
“Yeah, I’m hoping it’ll give a Conner a push to make a decision about college.”
“You know, he’s probably waiting for you to figure out what you want.”
“College isn’t in the cards for me, Hads.” My stomach knots. “I can’t afford it.”
“You know James would—”
“He’s already done too much. I can’t take anything else from him. It doesn’t feel right. Besides, I’ve never really wanted to do the whole college thing. I think I’ll be happy getting a job, or maybe doing something vocational at community college.”
“I love working at Java Beans. Maybe I can ask Hilary if she could find you a couple of shifts?”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“I wouldn’t mind. Besides, it would be kind of fun to work together.”
“Yeah, maybe.” I grimace. It isn’t that I don’t want to work and earn my way, but I know what people around the Bay think when they see me.
We reach our dorm building. “I was thinking we could hang out later? Cole mentioned they’re having a guys’ night, so I invited Remi over. She’s going to sneak some wine coolers in and a batch of Ellen’s cookies. It’ll be fun.”
“Maybe. I was going to catch up on some schoolwork.”
“Seriously, Kennedy? You just told me you don’t care about college.”
“I didn’t say that.” Not exactly.
“I’d really like it if you came. I know Remi would too.”
My brows pinch. I’m not sure about that. She and I haven’t always seen eye to eye since I arrived in the Bay.
“Remi is good people, Kennedy. You can trust her.”
“I’ll think about it.” We make our way upstairs, but the second I spot my door, my spine goes rigid.
“Kennedy?” Hadley asks when she realizes I’ve stilled.
“My door is open.”
“Huh, that’s weird. Maybe you left it unlocked by accident.”
“No, I didn’t. I specifically remember checking it.” I creep forward, my heart thundering in my chest.
“Maybe we should get security?” she suggests, but I’m already at the door. There’s no sign of forced entry. I push it open and slip inside. Everything looks untouched. My bed is still half-made and clothes strewn around the floor. I never claimed to be tidy.
“Anything?” Hadley moves up behind me.
“Everything looks okay,” I say, checking my sparse belongings. But when I pass the bathroom door, something catches my eye.
I nudge open the door and gasp.
“Kennedy—what the hell is that?”
<
br /> “Watch your back, trailer trash.” I read the red lipstick message smeared across the glass mirror hanging above the sink.
“Oh my God, she’s a crazy fucking bitch.” Hadley leans closer. “She even kissed the mirror.”
Sure enough, there’s a perfect red kiss just beneath the message.
“Lylah.” I spit her name, feeling anger explode in my veins.
“I’m going to call Conner.”
“No,” I snap.
“No?” Hadley frowns.
“I don’t want to give her the satisfaction. She’s never going to stop, Hadley. The only way I’ll win is if I ignore her.”
“Yeah, I get that, Kennedy. But she broke into your room. That’s serious.”
“For all I know the RA probably let her in, or she sweet talked someone into giving her a spare key.”
“She’s such a bitch.”
“Yeah.” I inhale a deep breath.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to call Conner?”
“No,” I rush out.
He’s finally in a good place, I don’t want to burst his bubble. Besides, it’s just words. I’ve dealt with worse, much worse.
I grab some paper towels, run them under the faucet, and start cleaning the glass. A sense of resolve washes over me as the red smudges finally disappear.
Nothing is going to ruin this weekend.
Nothing.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Conner
"What do you think?" I ask as we sit on a bench that looks out over Colton U's main buildings.
Since the moment we drove into town, I understood why Cole felt so at home here, because I did too. It's not as flashy as Sterling Bay, and the people aren't so wealthy and pretentious. It's relaxed, homey even.
"It's nice."
"It's nice, is that it?" I ask with a laugh, but it's forced at best. Kenny isn't herself today. I can't quite put my finger on why. She keeps telling me that she's fine, but she's not. She's worried about something.
"It's a nice place; the college looks incredible. It would be a great place to live if you decided to go here."