“We can go home? Great, let me go close out our tab.”
Aidan handed me Jasper’s leash and then headed inside the bar. My phone buzzed again with another text from Annie. Never drinking bourbon again. It makes me do stupid things.
Like doing Caleb? I texted back.
Yep. Exactly.
Not on our new futon, I hope.
When she didn’t reply right away, I thought the worst. Luckily she texted while we were on the walk home.
No sex on your brand new futon. Or on your floor. Swear.
Then where did you do it?
We went back to my apartment. He left already.
You okay?
The conversation went silent, so I knew I had my answer. We got back to the quiet apartment, and everything appeared intact. I released Jasper who bounded to the bedroom.
“You coming to bed?” Aidan asked when he saw me heading to the kitchen.
“In a minute. Just gonna clean up dinner remains.”
“I got it.”
I shook my head. “No, go ahead to bed. I just need a minute.”
He nodded in understanding and then disappeared into the bedroom. I cleaned up the kitchen, put the dishes in the dishwasher, and then made myself a cup of tea. I took it into my office and flipped on the light. Sitting at the desk, I swiveled around in my chair, taking in the walls covered in collaged corkboards. This was my space. All mine.
And I had to give it up.
Resentful? Not exactly.
Not ready.
But would I ever be ready? Each day Pierogi grew a little bigger, and my world grew a little smaller. My dreams would have to wait or be fit in around a baby—a baby that couldn’t fend for itself. A baby that needed me.
But what did I need? I wasn’t sure anymore. Our two-bedroom apartment was the perfect size for two adults and one medium-sized dog. I had my office, a place to work and write. Add in a baby…
My thoughts continued to swirl out of control as I sipped on lemon ginger tea. My career was in a state of transformation. I hadn’t planned for it. Just like I hadn’t planned for a baby right now. That was life, though. You could plan and plan, and then the universe laughed and said, “Just kidding.”
“Sibby?” Aidan asked from the doorway of the office. “You okay?”
I tapped my finger against the mug and nodded slowly. “Yeah. I’m okay.” Surprisingly, I meant it.
I woke up with a burst of energy, and I bounded out of bed before Aidan. When the coffee finished brewing, I went to wake him up. Aidan was sleeping on his back, and Jasper was resting his face on Aidan’s chest. Jasper yawned right in Aidan’s face. He grimaced.
“God, Sibby, your breath stinks.”
I marched over to the bed, picked up my pillow, and hit him with it.
“What the—”
The pillow landed on Aidan’s face.
“That was the dog breathing his doggie breath in your face,” I informed him.
His hands pushed the pillow to the side. Staring up at me with sleepy blue eyes, he smiled. “You’re a goddess.”
“Uh huh.”
“A beautiful pregnant goddess and your breath smells like cream soda and cotton candy.”
Climbing onto the bed, I let out a laugh. I leaned over and kissed him. “Cinnamon toothpaste.”
Aidan wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to him. Jasper slithered out of the way and jumped onto the floor. His collar jangled as he scratched behind his ear.
“Good morning, Trudy,” he teased. He kissed me and then nuzzled my ear.
“Good morning.” I ran my hand along his jaw, loving the feel of his beard. Jasper jumped back up onto the bed, and we spent the next few minutes having a morning love session that involved belly scratches and kisses. For Aidan, not the dog. The dog got some scratches, too.
“Has he been out?” Aidan asked, finally swinging his legs over the side of the bed. His dark hair was mussed, but his eyes were bright and clear.
“Not yet.”
“I’ll take him.”
“Coffee’s ready for when you get back.”
Aidan suited up the dog and himself and then was out the door. I poured myself a cup of coffee and took it to the couch. I was getting ready to turn on the TV when my cell phone vibrated.
“Hey,” I said, answering Annie’s call.
“Hey.”
“How are you doing?”
She sighed.
“Got it.” I blew on the coffee, hoping to cool it down a bit.
“So, listen. I canceled my going away party.”
“But that’s tonight!” I stated. “And I was looking forward to going out! To a bar.”
“Why?” Amusement colored her tone. “You can’t drink.”
“No, but I like the jukebox. Why did you cancel the party last minute? Is it because of last night?”
Annie paused, and then I heard her inhale a deep breath. “I’m in Montauk.”
“Uhm, how?”
“I left early this morning. My cousin just picked me up at the train station.”
“But—why?”
“Really? You’re asking me why?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. “What about all your stuff?”
“My uncle’s gonna take care of it.”
“So you’re not coming back to the city.”
“Sibby, it’s not like we’re never going to see each other again. You’ll come to Montauk.”
“Yeah.” I felt lost. My best friend had left the city, and we hadn’t even had a proper goodbye. “I wasn’t ready for you to just be…gone.”
“Story of your life lately, right?” she pointed out. “Not ready, but things happen anyway.”
“You’re mean to point that out.”
“You love me.”
“I do. You’ve been with me longer than Aidan.”
“I’m still with you, Sibby. I just had to get out of there.”
“I know. I’m just bummed.” I took a sip of the now cooler coffee. “How’s the view?
“Currently? I have a perfect view of my aunt doing jazzercise. I’m staying in the apartment over the garage,” she explained. “My kitchen window looks right into the living room of the main house.”
“Main house? Apartment over the garage? What is this, the servant’s quarters?”
“Nah, it was the original mother-in-law suite. But Grandma Betty decided cruise living was a better life.”
“And now you get to reap the rewards. Just do me one favor.”
“What?”
“Don’t hide from your life. Lick your wounds, feel through your feelings, because I know you have them—”
Annie laughed.
“And move on.”
“Thanks, Sibby.”
“Love you.”
“Love you too. Tell Aidan bye for me.”
“I will.”
We hung up, and I set my phone aside. I was a jumble of emotions. On one hand, I totally understood Annie’s need to quietly get out of town. On the other, I was miserable thinking about the fact that my two closest girlfriends now didn’t live close by.
I suddenly wanted to get back into bed and stay there.
The front door opened, and Jasper bounded inside. He ran to the futon and sat at my feet. I freed him from his leash, and then he took off for his water bowl. Aidan shrugged out of his coat and hung it on the hook by the door.
“It’s freakin’ cold out. I think we might get snow.” He pulled off his black beanie and ran his hand through his flat hair.
“Hmm,” I replied, pulling my legs up to my chest.
“Sibby? What’s wrong?”
“Adulting. I don’t want to do it.”
He came over to sit down beside me. Reaching for my coffee with one hand, he put his other on my leg. “Don’t think you have a choice there, Gertrude.”
“Give me my coffee back or prepare to meet a most sudden death.” He handed it over with a smile, but not before he took a sip. “Annie lef
t this morning for Montauk.”
“But her party.”
I shook my head
“Ah. I see.”
“Nat moved to Houston, Annie moved to Montauk, and Zeb works all the time.”
Aidan plucked the coffee from my hand again and set it on the table. “Come here.” He pulled me into his arms and pressed my head to his chest. “It will be okay.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I do.”
“That’s it?” I looked up at him. “I’m supposed to just take your word for it that everything will be okay?”
He smiled and kissed the end of my nose. “You got any other ideas?”
Chapter 25
#hormonehostage
I set my glasses aside and rubbed my tired eyes. My back ached from sitting at my desk for hours, pouring over the plan I was creating for the release of my new book. I had about fifteen lists going with names of editors, graphic designers, proofreaders, and bloggers.
So began the process of DIY.
“This is exhausting,” I said to Stacy, looking at her through our video Skype window.
Her blonde hair was pulled into two pigtails, her bright pink ends curled. “I can only imagine. Find an editor yet?”
I shook my head. “I combed through the list of the editors you recommended and sent most of them emails. No one’s emailed me yet.”
“Don’t worry. You’ll find a good editor.”
“If only that were the only issue. There’s so much to worry about.”
She smiled in sympathy. “I know.”
“I gotta get out of my house, get some fresh air.”
“Don’t forget to rest,” she reminded me. “Drink orange juice. That always helped my sister when she was getting…ya know.”
“Uppity?” I supplied.
“Yeah, uppity.”
I glanced down at Jasper who was stretched out on the wood floor. How I envied his life. Naps, food, belly rubs.
“Call me later if you need anything,” she said. “I’m just gonna be hanging out at home, playing with makeup.”
“And getting paid to do it,” I pointed out.
She grinned. “Yep. I used to dream of this when I was a little girl.”
I closed our connection and pushed back from my desk. Reaching my arms over my head, I stretched out the muscles of my back that were tight and in desperate need of Aidan’s hands. Unfortunately, Veritas was closed for a private event, so he wouldn’t be home until late.
“Hey, Jasper. You wanna go outside?” I asked.
The lazy mongrel stretched and then flopped back down. I shook my head. Not that I blamed him. The temperature had dropped, and the weather app was predicting snow. It was always wrong, so I didn’t put much faith in it, but when I looked out the window, the late afternoon sky was white.
Jasper wasn’t at all prepared in case it snowed. The city streets would be salted, and it burned paws. “Okay, buddy,” I said, going over to him and crouching down. He wormed his head toward me and closed his eyes in doggie bliss when I scratched his belly. “We gotta get you outfitted for winter.”
I stood and headed for the front door. I threw on all my layers including a hat, gloves, and a scarf. I wasn’t taking any chances with the cold.
The wind was whipping through the streets, stirring up the fallen dried leaves. I burrowed my face so only my eyes were visible. Thankfully, the pet store was only three blocks from the apartment. The owner behind the counter already knew Jasper, and Jasper knew him—due to all the treats he got whenever we came in.
“Sit,” Julio said.
Jasper dutifully planted his behind on the floor as he eagerly waited for his reward.
“Good boy,” the owner said. With a smile, he held out his hand, and Jasper lapped up the treat. It was gone in one bite.
“How are you today, Julio?” I asked him.
“Tired,” he said. “The grandchildren came over yesterday.”
I laughed. “Full house, huh?”
“They ran us in circles. My wife and I collapsed before they did.” He clapped his hands together. “What brings you in here today?”
“Dog boots. For winter.”
“Ah.” He waved for me to follow him. Jasper was on the man’s heels, hoping for another treat. We went to the back of the store in the corner and stopped. “Here.” He picked up a pair of plain black dog boots, sized medium. He ripped them out of the package. “Let’s try these on him.”
I scooped Jasper up into my arms. The owner got the front two booties onto Jasper before he squirmed to get away. He slipped out of my arms, landed on the floor, and darted to the other side of the pet store, out of sight. A moment later, Jasper ran back to us, boots off his paws and in his mouth. He dropped the boots and immediately started chewing on them.
I looked at the pet storeowner and sighed. “How much do I owe you?”
After throwing away the ruined boots, I leashed up Jasper and left. He dragged me down the street when he saw a fluffy white ball of fur in a pink coat. “He’s friendly!” I called out.
The owner of the white puff turned up her nose and scooped up her dog. Jasper whined when his new friend disappeared around the corner. I stuck out my tongue at her behind her back. “This ain’t Park Avenue, lady. We’re in Brooklyn. No need for the ’tude,” I muttered.
Jasper looked up at me with sweet brown eyes, his tail thumping against the sidewalk.
“You should’ve played it cool, dude. You were too eager. Come on, let’s get home. Mama needs some hot chocolate.”
Keeping my eyes on Jasper for a bit, I wasn’t paying attention to where I was headed—or whom I might run into—until a familiar voice called out my name.
“Matt?” I gaped in astonishment.
My ex smiled as he strolled closer. His hair was gelled and styled, his slate gray wool pea coat was accented with a bright red scarf, and he was tan. Very tan.
He leaned over and brushed his lips against my cheek. “It’s good to see you.” His gaze dropped to Jasper. “And you got a dog!”
“Yeah about three weeks ago,” I said, still marveling at the changes in Matt. When we’d been together, he’d dressed conservatively—and had been in the closet. Now he was out, proud, and the last I’d seen via Instagram, he and his boyfriend had just spent a weekend in Vermont making cheese. “You look great!”
He peered at me. “So do you.”
I shook my head. “No, I really don’t.”
“You do,” he insisted, letting his gloved hand drop near Jasper’s nose. “Your skin looks amazing. What skin regimen are you doing?”
Rolling my eyes, I snorted. “The pregnancy regimen.”
“You’re pregnant!” He grinned. “That’s awesome! Congratulations!” He moved in for a hug, but Jasper let out a low woof.
I looked down at him. “Hush, you. Matt’s a friend.”
Matt laughed. “Protective, isn’t he?”
“Not usually,” I admitted. “How are you and Taylor doing? I saw the photos on Instagram. Very nice.”
“We had fun. And now we’re back to the grind. And the gray city. How’s Aidan? And the bar?”
“Both are good.”
“And the writing?”
“Good.”
Once upon a time, I’d been planning a life with Matt. When I’d walked in on him and another guy having sex in our bed, I’d been furious—and embarrassed. Embarrassed that I hadn’t realized why we would never work long-term. His betrayal had come as a shock. But, it had all worked out. Matt was happy with someone. I was happy with Aidan. And life went on.
“Taylor and I just looked at an apartment on Clay Street.”
“To rent?” I asked.
He shook his head. “We want to buy.”
“Oh, wow.”
“We looked in Boerum Hill and Park Slope, but they’re too far away. And they’re so family-friendly.” He winced. “Sorry.”
I held up my hands. “No worries. Greenpoint is rapidl
y becoming the new Park Slope.”
“I know. But Greenpoint is closer to the city than Park Slope. And I refuse to buy in Bushwick. It’s still an overpriced shit hole over there.”
We laughed. “Some cool stuff is popping up,” I said. “That taco place we went to a few years ago…”
He shook his head. “Life’s weird, isn’t it?”
“It really is.”
“It was good seeing you, Sibby. Congrats again on the baby.”
“Congrats on being able to buy a place.”
We hugged briefly, and then went our separate ways. Eight point five million people in New York, and my world was still tiny.
I got home, and once I peeled all the winter layers off me, I settled down onto the futon. Jasper snuggled up next to me, and any motivation to work on my release plan went up in smoke.
“I should work,” I told him.
He rested his head on my lap. Sighing, I reached for the remote. “Let’s see if there’s some good bad TV to watch. I can work later.”
Three hours later, I was sobbing when I answered Aidan’s phone call. “Hello?” I hiccoughed.
“Sibby? God, Sibby, what’s wrong?”
I hiccoughed again and inhaled a shaky breath.
“Sibby, talk to me. Are you okay? Is it Pierogi? Is it Jasper? What is it?” he asked, voice desperate. “I’m leaving the bar, I’ll be home in—”
“I watched a Hallmark Christmas movie,” I blubbered.
“Christmas?” he repeated. “But it’s not even Thanksgiving yet. Why are they playing Christmas movies in November?”
“Because it’s Hallmark.”
“Okay,” he said slowly. “Aside from the Hallmark tears, is everything okay?”
“Uh huh.”
“Any emails from potential editors?”
“I haven’t looked in a few hours.”
“Why?”
“Because.”
“That’s not a valid answer.”
“Wind tunnel,” I said. “Going through a wind tunnel. I can’t hear you! Losing service.”
“You’re sitting on the futon,” he drawled in amusement. “Just check your email. If an editor doesn’t want to work with you, then that’s on them. Not you.”
Tales of a Sibby Slicker Page 17