by Scott, Raven
“I wanted you back, Illya. Theo’s off today, all day. Anyway, we’ve got some shit to talk about. I guess out here’s not a bad place. It’s probably not bugged, at least.” Leaning against the wall to slide down, Carlyle pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his dress pants, and I took the one he offered me. He sparked up, wordlessly passing me the lighter, and I took a huge drag trying to fill the gaping hole that’d opened up inside me. “So, someone is two-timing me, and your job as of right now is to find out who.”
“That’s some useful information, there, Carlyle.” Running my hands through my hair, I suddenly wished I’d spent a little more time with Carlyle instead of being lazy as all Hell. “How many languages do you speak?”
“English, Spanish, and German. I can understand Mandarin enough to get the gist of a conversation, but I always have a translator just in case.” I ran my hand through my hair, my lips clamping down on the cigarette butt, and the toxic fumes filled my lungs but didn’t leak out. “There’s no bugs anywhere. My tech experts are good. I cycle out my aides, so no one stays as long as this has been going on.”
“Why would you assume it’s someone here and not whoever you’re doing business with? You’ve already considered it, right?” Carlyle nodded, and I flopped my head back to exhale loud and heavy. My mind whirred slowly, dragged down by images of Theo when I blinked, and I scrunched up my nose in distaste. “How often do you swap out your cleaning ladies? The same chick has come by my place twice a week since I got here.”
“I’ve never swapped them out. There’s a reason these buildings are connected— work stays at work.” Tilting my head down, my question must’ve blazed from my eyes, and Carlyle’s brows knit tightly. “Unless someone decided they were too good for the rules. It’s not like I have a guard or someone personally check everyone going through the bridge.”
“You should conduct a raid, or trick some stupid assholes into thinking it’d be a good idea.” Sucking on the butt of my cigarette, I shrugged at Carlyle’s quizzical expression. “When I was homeless, the police would raid the shelters every couple months for people hiding out there after committing crimes. I’ve been arrested a few times because of it because of Sylvie back when she would steal for drug money. Back then, they’d wait until the shelters all filled up, and then they’d hit them at the same time.”
“I find it hard to believe that the police had that much manpower.” Skepticism and intrigue infected his tone, and I shrugged as I exhaled my lungful through my nose.
“Two cops show up at the shelter, and any homeless person knows they got nothing to do with it, we stay down. Normal people see the cops, assume they already know what they did, and try to bolt.” Carlyle grunted in acknowledgment of my point, and I sniffed hard as I stared at the white line on the concrete. “If you don’t know how then you just have to find out. And not be suspicious about it.”
“Right . . . and how do you suggest that, Illya?”
“Fake a raid.” Carlyle barked a shocked laugh, but I was deadly serious, and my lips thinned around my smoke. “I’m serious. You obviously have access to the people that can pull it off. The issue isn’t even the believability of the raid after it started— it’s getting everyone together without arousing suspicion that something’s wrong. Obviously, you don’t want to put your people through that if the dude doesn’t even show up. That’d be an answer in itself, though, I guess.”
“I’ll consider it. Before we resort to such a drastic measure, I want you to listen to all the conversations I’ve been having and the threats I’ve been receiving. I’ve had them sent to your apartment.” Nodding listlessly, I rested my chin on my knees as my mind wandered and became far, and the line began to blur on the asphalt. “Illya, are you sure you’re alright?”
“Do you ever feel really far away from someone even though they’re right next to you?” My gaze flickered up, and Carlyle’s expression tightened and walled up like the brick stretching sixty feet above us on all sides. Taking a drag of his own cigarette, he held his breath for a long second, and I tilted my head to rest my cheek on my knees. “I don’t know what it is. I can’t figure out what about me is so . . . so small, and I don’t get why this is happening. We had a fight this morning about sex. I don’t even want to have sex with him, really. I just want to be close to him, but he keeps pushing me away.”
“Is it about your chest?” His voice was surprisingly soft and tender, and I nodded as much as I could at that angle before he sighed heavily. “You can’t hide behind those bandages forever, Illya. I don’t blame Theo for wanting you to take them off, but you can’t really be upset because he’s mad you won’t. If you can’t have all of a person, there’s no point in having any part of them. Despite what people try to say . . . ”
“Why did you give me these two months off?” My question must’ve been what he expected this time, and Carlyle crouched down in front of me. His cigarette hung out of his mouth, and he looked really, really . . . kindhearted. Plopping his palm on my head, he snatched his smoke with his free hand before offering me the tiniest, brokenhearted smile I never thought I’d see on him.
“You remind me a lot of my sister right before she killed herself. Lost, listless, unable to do anything because you’re so out of touch with yourself. It’s not the same, I know. She was lost because our dad raised her to not be anything, not care about anything, not do anything for herself. The opposite is just as true, Illya. You care too much, you are too much, you do too much.” My eyes widened as surprise rocketed through me, and Carlyle chuffed softly before standing up and fixing the crack in his demeanor. His expression closed like an iron shutter, and I stood on stiff legs before he spoke up again. “Fix whatever is going on between you two. I need all your focus on this, and I need the man guarding my body not to be distracted. If you need more incentive than your own . . . I’ll kill you, Illya, because I won’t tolerate drama interfering with the job.”
A dense lump formed in my throat, and I nodded before Carlyle flicked his cigarette before opening the door for me.
37
Illya
Anxiety curdled my blood into a thick sludge at the knock that sounded through my apartment, and I winced when I stood up, and my shirt brushed against my scars. It’d been so long since I’d walked around without bandages, and my hands curled into tight fists by my sides. Shuffling heavily to the hallway, I paused in front of the door, and I could practically smell Theo from the other side.
I wondered what Carlyle threatened him with— if he threatened Theo at all— and what it meant if he didn’t. Was I really just being a self-conscious bitch? For reasons I couldn’t properly mouth, I went back and forth, but Theo was always saying the same things.
Take off my bandages.
Grabbing the knob, the cold metal burned my palm, and I inhaled mightily through my nose before pulling open the barrier. Theo propped on the frame, his arm over his head, and he gazed down at me through intense, narrowed eyes. Goosebumps washed down my arms, and a cold sweat broke out on my back as the silence stretched.
“I came to apologize for grabbing you.” Now that I’d had a moment to think, I realized maybe Theo wasn’t upset about my going so fast as he was trying to seem. Maybe, he was mad about something else.
So many ‘maybes’ and not many concrete answers when I could just ask him.
“You were right— I don’t trust you even though I should.” My mouth dried at my own confession, and I leaned on the wall to duck my head. “It was easy back before because I could disappear if things went south. I could run away if I got scared.”
“You were right, too, you know.” The gruff reply sent a spasm down my chest, and I glanced up from under my lashes as Theo frowned grimly. “I’ve wanted to fuck you since the second I saw you, Illya. Just because I found out you’re so much more— and I want it all— doesn’t mean it’s okay for me to go back on my word.”
“Do you wanna come in?” He nodded curtly, and I lowered my arm from the door to
gesture Theo through. My heart thundered harder and harder when he kicked the barrier shut, and powerful arms braced on either side of my head. The wall seemed so cold against my back compared to his heat, and his eyes didn’t leave mine for a fraction of a second. Unfurling my stiff fingers, I touched my trembling palms to his sharply defined abdomen under his t-shirt, and he clenched and released his jaw with a muted click.
“I’ve tried so hard not to fuck this up that I stopped being the person I was before I met you.” The lump in my throat became dense at Theo’s grumble, and I nodded dumbly in agreement. His abdominal muscles strained under his taut, thick skin, and my fingertip traced the fading edges of the scar that ripped up his side. “Let’s start over. Like the past eight weeks didn’t happen— the bad parts, at least.”
“I’d like that.” My murmur rasped through my chapped lips, and Theo’s skin twitched under my palms as his closeness set fire rampaging through my veins. We weren’t touching in any way but my hands against his abs, my fingers running through his happy trail, but I had never felt more infused with him. His dark eyes blazed, and he slowly reached to caress my cheek. Desire skittered down my neck, and I sucked in a sharp breath when he trailed the back of his finger down toward my sternum.
Something, somewhere in the dark, dank recesses of my mind, snapped as Theo’s fingers skirted the burn on my chest. His nose brushed mine, his features becoming skewed from his close he was, and my ribs threatened to concave as he exhaled hotly. My fingers slipped under the waistline of his jeans, and his curled around the high neckline of my tank top.
It happened slowly, too slowly, and I couldn’t breathe with Theo’s lips hovering just a fraction of a centimeter from mine. Reaching down, I pumped his hard, silky smooth cock— once— twice— and prickles raced up my spine when his shoulders shuddered in my peripheral vision. Each vein pulsed under my touch, his hardness unrelenting even when I squeezed, and he thrust into my palms with a sputtering breath.
But his eyes never wavered even as he fisted my t-shirt in both his palms and yanked. Heat from his body surged up my chest when the thin fabric gave way, and I managed a shallow gasp before he captured my parted lips in a searing kiss. My eyes boggled from the shock of his tongue dancing against mine, and I pulled my hands from his jeans to unfasten my own. The tinkling of buttons popping and zippers pulling rose in my ears above my racing heart, and his belt clattered loudly when he dropped his pants.
Theo tasted so good, so manly, so musky, and saliva pooled under my tongue as he cupped the back of my head to intensify the kiss. His little grunts reverberated through me, and I palmed his cock as he hooked his right arm under my leg to hoist it up. My core ached fiercely, need throbbing through me as I pumped his cock, and my folds spread as my desperation leaked out of me.
“Illya . . . ”
“Th-Theo . . . ” Swiping the bulbous head of his cock against my entrance, I sputtered a gasp as Theo nibbled my bottom lip. The intensity of the moment swept me away, and he hissed against my chin as hot, harsh pants ripped from my chest. Thrusting his length along my slit, he groaned into my mouth, and the passion behind his kiss tore me apart. Poising his head, I clamped down before he even entered my channel, and he tangled his tongue around mine.
Theo’s thick cock forced all the way in until his balls slapped my ass, and his hips dug into my thighs, and I saw stars. Stretching my walls as they undulated wildly in euphoria strangely muffled, his cock pulsed noticeably, and his groan clogged my throat. His fist slammed against the wall, his hard chest rippling against mine as he inhaled sharply, and my eyes rolled back in their sockets.
This wasn’t pleasure. There was nothing but white behind my fluttering lids, and I gasped when Theo pulled back. The ridges and veins of his cock caressed my walls, and he sucked the stale air from my lungs. His t-shirt brushed my front ever so gently, but I was drowning in the rapture only intensified by the sting.
“Fuck . . . ” Theo’s thunderous growl rattled my bones, and he hoisted my legs around his waist and grabbed my hips with bruising fingers. Tearing his mouth from mine, he leaned back and stuttered a gasp of his own, and I scratched at the wall in an effort to hold on to something. His gaze bored holes into my face as pleasure dropped my jaw, and he pushed my hips down and thrust up in a brutal snap.
Tensing, as a tsunami pulled back my ability to feel anything but where he touched me, I hiccupped a breath as Theo’s cock gyrated against my walls. The clap of skin on skin echoed in my ears, and my eyes nearly popped from their sockets.
“Jesus fucking Christ . . . Illya . . . ” My eyelids snapped open at the choked call, and I ground my teeth hard at the pure ecstasy playing on Theo’s face. This was so long in coming, so anticipated, and I clamped down on him as pleasure rolled up my spine. My knees clung to his sides, and he flopped his head back as he pulled back to show off the muscles straining in his neck.
The thick ridge of his cock caressed my inner walls surprisingly gently as he pulled back, and Theo ducked his head to capture my lips in a hot kiss. Powerful hands grappled my ass cheeks, and I choked from the jolt of rapture when he stepped out of his jeans to walk to the sofa.
“I’m gonna die with you, Illya.” Sitting down, Theo buried his left hand in my hair as the other fell to the side uselessly, and I didn’t resist when he tugged gently. His eyes were black with desire, and they didn’t stray from mine as they shimmered with conviction. “I’m gonna die with you.”
“I wish I could hug you.” His pupils blew at my murmur, and Theo finally tore his eyes from mine. He turned beet red, like a cartoon, from his shirt neckline up, and I stiffened as expectation gripped me. Leaning back a little, I flexed my fingers, but it didn’t really help the fear that rose up to shadow my thoughts.
Theo blinked hard, his face an unreadable mix of emotion, but it didn’t really matter when his cock went flaccid inside me. His cheek twitched, and icy prickles swept down my sternum as he covered his mouth with his right hand. Shivers rippled up his arms noticeably, and he went even redder in the face before his eyes met mine for the briefest of seconds.
“J-just looking at it.” He craned his neck in what my sluggish brain recognized at embarrassment, and my eyes widened in shock. Clearing his throat roughly, Theo rolled his jaw and jerked his shoulders, but he couldn’t get rid of the red in his cheeks. “You’re so beautiful, Illya.”
“D-do . . . did . . . ” Sputtering stupidly, my jaw dropped when Theo flung his arm over his face, and my brain short-circuited. He hoovered up a shallow breath, and my brows rose when he lowered his arm to meet my gaze with voraciousness. “Do . . . do you need . . . to . . . stop?”
“No. Turn around,” Theo grumbled illegibly, and I pursed my lips thinly as I carefully stood up. He pumped his cock, and affection blossomed in my chest before he grabbed my hip and sat me on his lap. “Dance.”
38
Theo
“Shit . . . choke it down, Illya.” I groaned in absolute bliss as Illya’s throat flexed around my cock, and she grabbed my ass to force me deeper. The bulge in her throat was mesmerizing as she hung her head over the side of the sofa, and I growled when she kneaded her hands greedily. Pulling out of her mouth with a gasp, I relished her rasping breaths, and I pumped my cock as she slobbered my balls with hungry, little sounds. “Yes-s-s . . . ”
“Theo . . . ” Her hoarse call bristled through my curls, and Illya slid down to lay flat on the sofa and spread her legs for me. My need for her raged in an inferno that would never die down, and I rounded the armrest to palm her creamy, sticky thighs. Everything I’d been yearning for in my woman came rushing to the surface, and her tight pussy undulated. Cum leaked down her ass cheeks, and I almost wanted to take a picture, it was such a gorgeous fucking sight.
But, truth be told, it was the thing she’d tried to hide that turned me on more intensely than I thought was possible. Illya was basically flat-chested from scar tissue. The only part of her breasts she had were the sides, and with her slender
profile, she could hide it. What was left of the once large, firm globes folded over her scar tissue a little, and with the bandages, no one could tell.
“Theo . . . ” Tearing my eyes off the huge, rectangular blotch of red and purple and pale, I nestled between Illya’s open legs as she wrapped her trembling hands around my jaw. Her mossy green eyes glowed, almost blindingly bright, and my heart threatened to burst from behind my ribs as I ground against her slippery folds. Capturing her lips in a heated kiss, I groaned as the burn lines on her thighs ruffled my leg hairs.
“You ready for me, you fucking sexy bitch?” Pressing my forehead against hers, I reached my good hand between us, and a sharp, prickly ache shot down my right side. Cracking open my eyes, memories floated in my glazed, blurry vision. At the club, when I’d grabbed Illya’s chest, I knew now why it hurt so much.
Just the tiniest bit of pressure, and the whole fucking mass of tissue shifted. That was agonizing . . . agonizingly hot.
“Yes . . . ” Sinking into her glorious heat at her breathless affirmation, I shuddered violently as Illya writhed in pleasure beneath me. She gasped, her slender brows furrowing, mouth open, but she was so damn quiet as her walls hugged my cock so nice. Grinding my hips against hers, I clenched my jaw as tingles assaulted my tailbone.
“Shit . . . ” Pulling back, I rammed Illya’s cervix with a snap of my hips, and she mewled softly as she threw her head to the side. Her nails scraped my stubble, and I set a hard pace as my balls tightened. She was such a good fucking lay, and I teetered on the edge as I thrust viciously. Ducking my head to smash my mouth on hers, I savored her taste, and she melted under me in unwavering submission.