by Magan Vernon
He moved in a gentle rhythm that made my whole body pulsate underneath his. He wasn’t like a jack hammer that just wanted to get it over with, but every movement was like a carefully thought out plan that he was savoring every moment of. His face was buried in my neck, his lips leaving a trail of kisses down my neck and collar bone.
“I want to look at you,” I murmured and tugged at his hair, pulling him back so that his beautiful green eyes met mine.
“If I have to watch your reactions, I’m going to finish quick,” he said with another series of thrusts that made my toes curl. I gasped, pushing my hips up to his.
“Like that,” he said in a strained voice.
I could feel my body close to the verge of eruption, and I pressed down on his lower back, pushing him deeper inside me. I reached pure and unbridled ecstasy and rolled my head back with a deep moan. His body soon followed, shuddering above me before he collapsed onto my chest.
I felt his heart beating wildly against mine, and for a moment we just laid there; our breathing and heartbeats in sync with one another. Then Trey leaned up, resting on his elbows. “That was amazing. You’re amazing.”
I leaned up and kissed him lightly. “You aren’t so bad yourself, Mr. Chapman.”
“I think it’s time that I re-think my politics, especially in the bedroom.”
I put my finger to his lips. “Let’s not talk politics. Especially when you’re still in me.”
A sly grin spread across his face, bringing out the dimples that I loved so much. “Then we should probably move this discussion to the bath tub.”
I bit down on his bottom lip. “I think I can handle that.”
I felt him come to life again inside me. “Miss Remy, if you’re going to keep doing that, there is no way we are ever going to make it out of this bed.”
“Maybe that’s how I like it,” I whispered, pushing my hips up and pressing them against his.
“You drive a hard bargain, Miss Remy.” He reached over, opening the night stand and pulling out another foil wrapper. “But I’m happy to oblige.”
Chapter 27
All it took was one tryst in the bedroom, and Trey’s sexual god opened up. Nights of cuddling to sleep turned into collapsing onto the bed after rounds of pleasure. I wasn’t complaining. I hadn’t even thought of a guy touching me until Trey came along, and now I couldn’t get enough of him. Finally, someone who loved me and made me realize that sex wasn’t just something that could be used against me.
It was hard to get back into it. Sure, Trey was amazing in every sense of the word, but there was still something nagging at me. I wanted to give all of myself to Trey and I was, on a normal basis, but there were times when Trey would sneak up behind me and I would jump when his hand got to my breast. He would have to wait for me to make the first move or else I would flinch when it was unexpected. I didn’t like the fear I had with my own boyfriend, but I didn’t know what to do to change it.
I came back from class on Friday and immediately went to Trey’s apartment. He was sitting on the couch and watching the news, as per usual, but he jumped up with a huge, dimpled grin on his face as soon as I walked in. I was afraid he was hoping for a quickie, and I was still sore from his idea of trying something he heard one of his fraternity brothers talk about. My back would never be the same.
“Hey, you.” He sauntered over, wrapping his arms around my waist and swaying back and forth.
“Hey.”
“What are you doing this weekend?”
I raised an eyebrow. “Um, I assume working and hanging out with you.”
He stopped swaying, his eyes catching mine. Even his eyes were practically smiling and bringing out the freckles that paraded on his nose. “How about we spend the weekend up in Chicago? I already booked us a room for tomorrow night.”
“Chicago? This weekend? But we have our paper and debate on Monday.”
“All the more reason to go,” he interjected. “Look, I know we’re both stressed about it, and a weekend away could do us some good.”
“But I still have to go over my notes, and I have another assignment for foreign policy,” I stammered. I tried to work on all of those things the weekend before, but since it was the first weekend after our first time, Trey wanted to spend the whole time in bed. The bedroom is definitely not the best place for studying.
He put his hands on my shoulders. “I promise that you can work on all of that tonight and on the car ride there. Can we please just do this, for me?”
With his pleading eyes and dimpled smile, there was no way I could ever say no to him. I hated to see what the future of America would hold if he was an elected official. If he could make me melt with his looks, then he could probably turn everyone else into putty. Luckily, he was more than just a pretty face...and a great kisser.
***
The next morning I didn’t wake up in Trey’s arms, but rather to an empty side of the bed. I slowly sat up, stretching my arms over my head. There were perks to sleeping with my boyfriend every night, but I also missed being able to wake up and not have to worry about all my popping joints and him wondering if there was something wrong with me.
I didn’t have to worry where he was for too long because in he came, already fully dressed and with two foam coffee cups in his hands. “You’re finally up!” he said with a grin plastered on his face, handing me one of the cups.
I glanced at the alarm clock on his night stand. “It’s only seven, and it’s a Saturday.”
“But it’s our Saturday. You can’t just sleep the entire day away.”
I groaned, taking a sip out of the foam cup. I knew before I even tasted it that it would be my favorite pumpkin latte. It had become Trey’s new thing to get one for me every morning.
“We have dinner reservations at Alinea, and if you don’t get moving we won’t make it there by then.” He pulled me to my feet and kissed my forehead.
“Alinea? Seriously? I think it costs an entire month’s rent to eat there.”
The grin spread across his face, and I could count every single one of his freckles that were even more noticeable when he smiled. My last count was thirty-two. “But for you, it’s always worth it.”
“Am I going to have to repay you in sexual favors for the dinner and hotel, Mr. Chapman?” I wrapped my fingers through his belt loops and pulled him closer.
He put his hands on my shoulders, keeping the distance between us. “Not right now, Miss Remy. Go get ready.”
I pouted. “You’re going to refuse me?”
He groaned. “I don’t want to argue with you right now. There will be plenty of time for that on Monday. For now I just want to get on the road and enjoy the weekend.”
“Fine,” I mumbled and stomped off to the bathroom like a two-year-old with a temper tantrum.
Somehow in the few weeks post staying at his parents, I managed to spend less time at my apartment, but a lot of my stuff still managed to get over to Trey’s. I had a drawer full of my clothes, a spare hair dryer, tooth brush, and I learned to just carry my makeup with me, so I would have it at his place.
When I emerged from the bathroom, Trey already had on a tweed, double-breasted jacket and was checking his phone.
“Are you that ready to get out of here that you couldn’t wait to put your coat on?”
He didn’t answer right away, so I took that moment to check myself out one last time in the mirror. I didn’t know what he had planned for Chicago, and my wardrobe wasn’t as nice as his in the first place. With what little I had in my drawer, I had to settle for a pair of skinny jeans and a long, gray and black striped sweater. It didn’t look too bad, but I always felt like I looked like a bag lady standing next to the guy in designer dress shirts.
“Yeah, I’m ready,” he said, and I turned to see Trey finally stuffing his phone in his pocket.
“Checking your Fantasy Congress stats?”
“Yep.”
I wasn’t used to Trey’s one word answers. He was di
stracted beyond anything I’d ever seen him. Maybe a trip out of town would be good for him. “So, are you ready to go then?” I grabbed my packed messenger bag and threw it over my shoulder.
“Ready.”
He took his small suitcase and my hand, leading me out of the apartment and down to the underground parking garage. We put our stuff in the back seat and slid into the car. Chicago was almost three hours from campus, so I put together a mix on my iPod and plugged it into the car as soon as Trey started it up. The first song hummed through the speakers, Bob Dylan’s “Times are a Changin’“.
Trey’s smile finally made another appearance. “What is this?”
I turned down the music slightly. “It’s my political mix for the ride. All of the great political songs for our trip.”
“And what kind of music did you find for this? Is it a bunch of protest music from the 1970s?”
I rolled my eyes even though I knew he couldn’t see it and clicked my tongue. “Um, no, I didn’t think you’d appreciate that, so I found a nice mix.” I clicked a few buttons on my iPod screen and scrolled through the play list. “Besides Bob Dylan, we also have some Tracy Chapman, Bob Marley, John Lennon, and a little Ol’ Dirty Bastard.”
“So, what you are telling me is that they are all liberal musicians playing protest songs?”
I gently shoved his arm. “What would you prefer? Do you want me to find some monotone music that would be played in the elevator of the Washington Ritz Carlton?”
“I actually prefer your bathtub mix.”
“Classical is only reserved for the bathtub. I don’t need it for a car ride. Instead I’m going to sing along to some “Ghetto Superstar”, just for you.”
Trey shook his head, but the smile stayed on his face. “You’re something else.” He took my hand in his and placed it on the center console. “And I love you for it.”
The music went from “Revolution” to “Strange Fruit” and everything in between. It really was my most eclectic mix, but by the time it changed around to “Black Parade”, Trey put on his turn signal for the eastern suburbs exit.
“Um, are you taking some back way instead of going through the city?” I asked.
His face was stiff as a statue with his jaw clenched. “We are taking a little detour before we go to our hotel.”
“A detour to where?” I asked, fear suddenly rising in me. I knew Trey wouldn’t do anything to hurt me, but I was afraid that I was in for another meeting with his father or some other political mogul, and he didn’t warn me.
Then I saw the sign as clear as day, one of the billboards for Taylor that I used to pass every time I went back to school after visiting my parents. It was of a blonde girl smiling with a hand full of books and the campus in the background. It said something stupid like “Taylor: City life without the city price.”
We couldn’t be. He wouldn’t make me go back there. I stared at Trey, hoping he wouldn’t say what I feared he was going to.
“I wrote a few emails to some people at Taylor,” he said, tentatively.
“I hope it was about starting a College Republicans chapter.”
He shook his head ever so slightly. “No, it wasn’t.”
Trey took the turn down Main Street, the one I knew lead to campus. He couldn’t be going there. No way he would do that to me.
“Trey, please tell me where we are going.”
He let out a deep breath. “We’re going to meet with the Alpha Mu’s.”
“WHAT?” I shrieked. “Why the hell would we do that?”
He winced and didn’t say anything.
“Dammit, answer me, Trey.”
He stayed silent and then put on his turn signal, pulling into one of the many parking lots. He put the car in park but didn’t turn off the engine and then slowly turned toward me, his eyes warm, but his face stern. “Mon, I didn’t know how much this all affected you until I really saw it. I know that you’ve been going to group counseling, but that doesn’t stop you from flinching every time I go to touch you. At first I thought it was because you were repulsed, but then I noticed it every time that we’re about to have sex. You close your eyes and suck in like you are expecting me to hurt you.”
I never thought he could actually see any of that. I didn’t even realize I was still doing it. I thought the first time broke down that invisible barrier.
He raked his hands through his hair and then took both my hands in his. “You refused to get to know me because of what some guy did to you. We’ve constantly fought about contraception, and I punched a guy out for touching you. I’m not going to let this guy who hurt you get away with affecting our relationship anymore. We’re meeting with the president of Alpha Mu today, and we’re going to get something done.”
I felt the tears pricking at my eyes. I didn’t want to admit that everything he said was true. I loved Trey. There was no doubt about that. He also turned me on like I didn’t think was ever possible, but I still couldn’t put that night out of my head. I still thought about that guy more than I cared to admit. I just didn’t know if I could handle being in the house and reliving the experience all over again. “I-I-I can’t go to that house.”
“Hey.” Trey leaned over the seat, cupping my face into his hands. “We aren’t going to the house. We’re meeting with him at the Greek advisor’s office, along with the guy who did this to you.”
“What?” I sniffled, snapping my head back and out of his hands. My heart felt like it was going to leap through my chest, it was beating so fearfully. I hadn’t seen him since it happened. “How, how did you even know who it was?”
Trey heaved a heavy sigh. “When we started getting intimate, that’s when I noticed the problem. Then I figured out that the only way to get through this would be to go back to the source. When I contacted the president of Alpha Mu he tried to play dumb at first, but then he finally admitted that he knew everything.”
I shook my head, the salty tears stinging my eyelids. “I don’t know if I can do this,” I whispered.
Trey put his hand to my face and wiped away a fallen tear with his thumb. “You’re one of the strongest women that I’ve ever met. I know you can do this.” He moved his hand and placed it on top of mine. “And I’m going to be right there with you every step of the way.”
***
I hadn’t been on Taylor’s campus since spring, but it hadn’t changed a bit. It wasn’t much of a campus, but more of a few buildings mixed in with other retail shops along a busy street. They always boasted about having the city atmosphere without actually being in the city. What that really meant was that I’d just have to wait at crosswalks every time I wanted to go to class and had to take a bus or get a ride to my sorority house, which is a few miles outside of campus.
The student center was the biggest building that was set on the square. It was like a big park in the middle of the city with a looming brick building complete with clock tower at the center. Last fall it looked gorgeous among the Oak trees and their changing leaves, but today it looked like a prison waiting to swallow me whole.
Trey squeezed my hand. “Are you ready?”
“No.” I took a deep breath and let out slowly. “But I’m going to do it.”
I didn’t have a choice. I could have screamed and cried and begged him to take me back, but that wouldn’t have solved anything. We would have been back to square one. I couldn’t keep running in fear.
We walked hand in hand down the cobblestone pathway and past the few students who were reading on benches or throwing a Frisbee around the courtyard. None of them knew what I was there for. None of them even took a second glance at me and Trey.
Trey opened the front door for me, it led into a grand, marble entryway. It used to be the town’s courthouse before the college bought it and turned it into the student center. On the first floor was a Starbucks and a few lounging areas, but we took the back stairwell up to the second floor where the administration offices were, and Greek Affairs.
I let T
rey lead me down the small hallway to a frosted glass window with the word “Greek Affairs” set in an old English font. He pushed the heavy door, which opened to a small room without any windows, an old oak desk and a few chairs sat on the opposite wall. There were framed posters from different recruitments throughout the years and pictures with famous alumni. But none of it looked warm or inviting to me. They all felt like they would fall off the wall and bury me.
A woman with short, black hair wearing a brown pant suit emerged from a door behind the desk. “You must be Trey Chapman,” she said with a thick Chicago accent.
“I am, and you must be Barbara Brown.” He put his hand out and gave her his political handshake.
After shaking his hand her dark eyes locked on me. It wasn’t a look of anger or concern, just a blank stare. “And you must be Monica Remy.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I managed to squeak out.
“You must be an awfully important person for me to get a call for a meeting on a Saturday.”
“This is a very important matter, Mrs. Brown,” Trey said, putting a protective arm around me.
She nodded. “So it is, Mr. Chapman. The other two men are already waiting in my office. Won’t you come in?” She stepped back, holding her arm out to the door.
I followed Trey, slowly. I didn’t want to see them sitting there. I didn’t want to face the boys that I’d been trying so hard to run from. But there they were, sitting with their heads down, their hair combed, and probably wearing the only suits they owned. They didn’t even look at me when I entered. The president, Josh, was on the left. I couldn’t forget his trademark bed head that was always talked about because everyone said he never left the bedroom. And then there was Joey, the bastard that ruined me. His hands were folded in front of him, and his knee shook slightly. His hair was cut short, not hanging in his eyes like the last time I saw him. Too bad, I would have wanted to grab him by the hair and push him to the ground before I stomped on him.