by Abigail Lee
He stiffened when I touched him and made no move to wrap his arms around me.
“Really.” Trey looked pissed. “I didn’t realize that dancing on a stage half naked was the same thing as looking for us.”
“Oh, fuck off, Trey.” Hannah was already pissed again, too. “It’s not the end of the world to have fun on Spring Break.”
“Hey.” I stepped in front of him but kept my arms around his waist. “Are you mad?”
“Yeah,” he answered but kept his stare over the top of my head. “I am.”
“Will you at least look at me?” I didn’t realize we did anything that would make them this pissed off.
He looked down, but his eyes weren’t the same. They seemed to glare through me as if I weren’t even there. I ran my hand over his chest, but he reached up and stopped me.
“Don’t.” He looked away again. “I’m going to walk back to the house.”
“Okay, then I’ll walk with you.” I was starting to get worried.
He didn’t reply, instead headed toward the water and began walking in the direction of the beach house. What in the hell happened? I was starting to sober up now, but I knew we didn’t do anything too bad on the stage. We were just dancing. Half of the girls up there were topless or grinding and kissing on each other. We just danced.
We walked in silence to the house, and it wasn’t until we opened the back door that I realized Trey and Hannah had been right behind us. I grabbed her hand and pulled her back out onto the porch.
“Did we do something wrong?” I whispered. “They’re acting like we cheated on them or something.”
“Who in the hell knows. He won’t talk to me.” She looked defeated, but I knew she would put a good front up for him. “He’s just been on me this entire trip about acting the right way. I just wanted to have fun today. Sorry I got you in trouble, too.”
“We just danced.” I thought back through the entire afternoon.
“I know.” Her shoulders perked back up as she turned toward the house. “If I’m in trouble, it better be for something good. I’m going to shower and get ready for tonight.”
I shut our bedroom door only to find an empty room. My legs gave out at the end of the bed, and I sat on the hard mattress, pulling my knees against my chest. There had to be something I was missing. We climbed on the stage. We were both wearing bikini tops and cut off shorts. We didn’t take anything off. No other guys touched us. He walked back into the room with wet hair and only a towel wrapped around his waist.
I let out a small breath when he dropped his towel and pulled a pair of shorts from his bag. He slowly dressed without acknowledging my existence, all the while knowing I was watching his every move. I knew my eyes were on the brink of overflowing, and with each second, it was getting harder to hold back the tears.
“Are you crying?” I could feel the disgust ripple through his words.
I glanced toward the floor and waited for him to apologize or explain what in the hell was going on. Instead, a slamming sound filled my ears, and I felt the room go empty. Only then did I allow the tears to flow. I cried until there were no more tears, then remembered a decision I had made only a couple of months prior. No man was ever going to make me feel like I wasn’t worth his time. And I wasn’t going to waste another minute of this vacation worrying about a mistake I knew I didn’t make.
Wiping my face, I made way to Hannah’s room where I had been sharing their in-suite bathroom.
“Oh, honey.” She ran to hug me when she saw my face. “Are you still fighting?”
“Are you not?” I asked.
She stared at me, not wanting to tell me the truth. Her glow told me they had already made up a few times.
“It doesn’t matter. I just need to shower and get ready to go out. I’m not wasting my time in Padre crying over a boy.”
“Okay, then.”
She went back to the mirror to finish her makeup as I showered, shaved, and dried my hair. I applied an extra amount of makeup focusing on making my eyes smoky and my lips ruby red. I slid on the too short, skintight dress that I was unsure I would even wear. We’ll see how mad this makes him.
“You look hot!” she whistled.
“Good.” I smiled and looked down at the revealing black dress. Because that was the point of this whole show.
We walked into the living room to find the guys taking shots of what looked like whiskey, and Brandie sitting on the couch watching Wheel of Fortune. A few whistles and calls went out when everyone noticed us. Luke turned in his stool, and the look of shock that crossed his features was priceless. His face flashed back to anger quicker than it had changed, and he shot back another small glass of the amber liquid. I walked straight to him and leaned into his ear.
“Are you ready to tell me what in the hell I did so wrong that you feel the need to treat me like shit?” My lips were against his ear, but I honestly didn’t care if anyone else heard me.
He shook his head and gripped the shot glass so hard his knuckles went white.
“Well then, you better drink up, buttercup. It’s going to be a long fucking night for the both of us.” With that, I stepped back and headed for the door. “It’s girls’ night. Come on Hannah. Brandie.”
They quickly kissed their boyfriends and assured them we would end up at the same club later that night. I heard a loud crash right as they were walking out of the door. On the inside, I was ready to pull on sweats and crawl into my bed, all the while begging for forgiveness for whatever made him mad. On the outside, I was the blond bombshell tonight ready to take this town by storm.
“Okay, I need to eat first,” Hannah stated as we walked down the street toward the restaurants and clubs. Our beach house was less than a mile from everything, which made it easy to walk everywhere.
“Do either of you know why he’s so mad?” I asked. “Did Trey or Tommy say anything? How did you get Trey to not be mad at you anymore?”
“Please.” She rolled her eyes. “That man is controlled by his dick. It didn’t take long for him to forget whatever happened.”
“So, you don’t know,” I asked.
“Sorry.” She realized that I was still upset. “He’ll come around. Just give him some space.”
“I thought he was going to pick you up and carry you back to your room when you walked out in that dress.” Brandie laughed as she twirled her long, dark hair around her finger. “I have a feeling you guys will be making up later tonight.”
Brandie was becoming a good friend and someone I liked to have around. She was quiet and only talked when she felt it was necessary. But her opinion was always honest and well thought out.
We walked into a small seafood restaurant and ordered dinner out on their patio. After a couple hours and more than a few drinks, we paid our tab and began to make our way to the club. Once inside, we found our group of guys, including a very drunk Luke. He glared down at me through his glazed over eyes. I quickly glanced away and grabbed Hannah’s hand on my way to the bar. I needed more alcohol to deal with this.
“Hey ladies,” a tall guy with long blond hair leaned into us. “Can I buy you a drink?”
“No thanks.” I smiled. “Our boyfriends are just back there.”
He nodded in their direction and went back to his friend on his other side.
“Two lemon drop shots and two Bud Lights,” I said to the bartender, handing her a twenty. “Thank you.”
We tipped the shots back as soon as they were in our hands and walked back to the guys with our beers in hand. I wobbled a little on my tall black heels. We had been drinking for a majority of the day plus the emotional roller coaster I was on made my legs shaky. Over the next couple of hours, I lamely clung to Hannah or Brandie since the other guys were off searching for that night’s fling. Luke never moved from our small group but never attempted to talk to me either. Saying it was awkward would be the understatement of the century.
“I’m going to the bathroom,” I leaned into Hannah before wal
king toward the edge of the club.
I was about to take my place in the long line when a hand clasped my wrist and began to drag me further from the crowd. I started to scream when I was whipped around and pushed against the back wall of the bar. A pair of green eyes burned down into me, and my breath caught this time out of fear. I had never seen him so mad or felt so caged in before.
“Where are you going?” he demanded.
“To the bathroom.” I nodded toward the line I was about to get in.
“You can’t just go to the bathroom alone in a place like this.” He closed his eyes and breathed in a few times. “Do you know how many girls come down here and do stupid shit like you did today? Most of them are lucky like you and make it out unharmed. A lot of others don’t.”
“What are you talking about?” I could feel my anger starting to boil again. “I’ve been with you or Hannah all day. Just tell me what you’re so mad about.”
“Do you know how many guys were filming you today when you were on that fucking stage dancing? Hundreds. They were all watching you and groping at you the second you were in arm’s reach.”
I let this information sink in as he released my wrist and ran his hands through his hair.
“I had to sit back and watch the entire fucking thing. We tried to get through to the stage and couldn’t, so we decided we would just watch and make sure nothing happened. If anything happened to you…” he trailed off as he sucked in another deep breath. “It makes me fucking crazy how you’ve just come out of nowhere and shifted everything in my life upside down. I was fine when I was alone, but now that’s not an option I can even consider anymore. Plus, I would never have left the bar this long for anyone else. And you decide to act like a slut and dance for the entire island.”
“Are you done?” I asked as I rubbed the skin where he had been holding me.
“Not even close, sweetheart.” He took a step forward, pinning me against the wall, and grabbing my ass. “I’m thinking about fucking you right here since you seem to like it when people watch you. I think you need a reminder of who you belong to.”
I pushed against his chest and looked him straight in the eye. “You’re an asshole, and you can go fuck yourself. Let go of me now before you regret it.”
He leaned his head back and let out a menacing laugh. Before I could think about it too much, I lifted my knee until it connected with its target. He buckled immediately and placed one hand on the wall and the other on his balls.
“I told you to let go.” I walked away more pissed than I had ever been in my life. I found Trey with Hannah and pointed in the direction where I had left Luke. “You need to go help your friend.” I knew it was the whiskey talking, but I’ll be damned if I let a guy treat me like that for any reason.
I watched as Adam, Trey, and Luke walked past the table together and toward the party boat that was about to leave the dock. Surely, he wouldn’t get on that boat after he just talked to me like that. When Trey walked back to the table alone, I knew that was exactly what he had done.
“He just needs some space,” Trey tried to reassure me. “Let him sober up some and then you guys can talk again.”
“Screw this,” I stood up. “I’m going back to the house.”
“We’ll go with you.” Brandie grabbed Tommy’s hand and pulled him toward us.
“Yeah, us too.” Trey wrapped one arm around Hannah and the other around me.
When I got back to the house, I stripped down and put on a pair of sweatpants and a tank top. Not even bothering to wash my face, I crawled under the covers and cried until sleep found its way in. I felt a body dip into the bed next to me and glanced at the clock to see that it was 5:00AM. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled my back into his chest. My eyes filled with tears again as the snoring began next to me.
I woke the next morning with a headache and a snoring Luke next to me. I stared at him as he breathed in and out. He was handsome even after a night like we had, and my heart ached as the memories came flooding back. I slowly crawled out of bed and quietly changed clothes. Stopping by Hannah’s bathroom, I washed off and reapplied some makeup and threw my hair up in a messy bun. My eyes weren’t as swollen as I’d expected, but I had slept past noon so that must have helped some. Making my way to the kitchen, I heard everyone whispering, but they silenced as soon as they saw me.
“What?” I asked. “What happened?”
When no one answered, I glared at Adam.
“Adam, what happened after you guys left last night?”
“You don’t have anything to worry about,” he answered. “We rode the boat for about an hour and then went to a few other clubs. He came back here when we did. I don’t even think he talked to another girl.”
“He was too busy trying to jump off the boat to get back to you.” Colin laughed.
I moved my glare to Colin, unsure if everyone knew how Luke had really acted last night and the things he had said to me. Suddenly insecure, my eyes filled with tears for the millionth time as everyone watched me.
“Okay, it’s time for some shopping.” Hannah wrapped her arm around my shoulders, and Brandie followed us through the door.
“I feel like I can’t even breathe.”
We had been gone most of the afternoon and had sat down at a smoothie shop before making our way back to the house.
“That’s understandable,” Brandie smiled at me. “Yesterday was a lot to take in.”
“What happened when he cornered you by the bathroom?” Hannah asked. “Trey told me you kneed him in the balls.”
“I did.” I laughed. “Hard.”
They both stared at me and waited for me to speak up.
“Guys, I really don’t want to talk about it. Sorry.” I shrugged. “Maybe in a few more days.”
“Okay, we’ll be here whenever you’re ready.” Hannah squeezed my hand.
When we got back to the house, I hesitated at the front door. “I’m going to walk down to the beach for a little while.”
“Do you want us to go with you?” Brandie asked.
“No, I just need to be alone for a little bit before I face whatever is waiting for me in there.”
I turned and made my way to the back of the house. Kicking my flip-flops onto the bottom step of the porch and setting down the few bags that contained souvenirs that I had bought, I started walking down the path that led to our private beach area. The sand felt good beneath my toes, and I tried to let the salty air calm my nerves. No such luck there.
The beach was quiet since most people were home getting ready for their night out. I just wanted to sit in this old wooden chair, listen to the water crash onto the shore, and pretend that my life hadn’t fallen apart in a matter of hours yesterday. How could things have possibly taken this turn?
I was not sure how long I sat there, but the sun was setting when I felt two strong arms lift and scoot me forward and then a body was sitting behind me. I pulled my knees into my chest causing him to wrap his arms around them, too, and hold me tightly to his chest. My body started trembling with sobs, and I felt wetness on my shoulder where his head was leaning. It was dark by the time I looked up at the stars and took in a deep breath of air.
“I’m sorry.” He sounded like he’d been crying all day, too. “I know I fucked everything up. I’m so sorry.”
I shook my head not even sure how to respond.
“Please tell me I can fix this,” he continued.
“Do you remember everything you said to me last night?” I asked. “What you did when we were at that club?”
“I don’t remember much after you walked out of the house wearing that black dress. Everything kind of went red after that, and I downed about half a bottle of whiskey.”
I let out a dry laugh and wiped my face. “You called me a slut for dancing yesterday afternoon right before you pushed me against a wall and threatened to fuck me so everyone around us could watch.”
He dropped his hands that were around me and leaned
his head back against the chair. Running his hands across his face, he let out a long puff of air.
“What did you do when that happened?” I could barely hear him.
“I kneed you in your balls and walked away.”
He let out a small laugh. “Good. I deserved it.”
After a few minutes, he sat back up and turned me to face him. He ran his hands across my cheeks, drying any remaining tears.
“I honestly don’t even know what happened. I’m still trying to figure that out, which was why I couldn’t talk to you yesterday. You bring out these feelings in me that I’ve never had to deal with before. Everything in my life was lined out exactly how I wanted it. Then, one day, you walked in and shifted everything around. Don’t take that the wrong way because I’m glad that you did, but it’s been a lot to deal with in the short time we’ve been together. I love you so much, baby.”
His shoulders slumped a little further down, and I sat completely still listening to him.
“I’ve never been so mad as when I saw you on that stage. I could have murdered every guy who was looking at you, and I wouldn’t have thought twice about it. That’s no excuse for how I acted after that. I was a complete dick, I know that. I just hope you’ll give me a chance to make this right again. Please don’t end this because I fucked up yesterday.”
“I honestly don’t even know where to go from here.” I looked down at my hands before turning my gaze back into his eyes. “Part of me wants to forget all about it because it hurts not to be near you. The other part is telling me run away and never look back. You scared me last night.”
“Are you scared of me now?” he asked, and I could see the hurt in his eyes.
“No.” I shook my head.
“I would never hurt you.” He ran his hand across my cheek. “You know that, right?”
“I thought I did. But the way you acted and how harsh you were with me—I almost expected you to hit me.”
Raw pain flashed across his eyes before he looked away and became silent.
“Is that why you never drink?” I asked. “Because it makes you angry.”