by C. J. Duggan
‘Why would I change my mind?’
Dave’s eyes flicked up again, meeting Nikki’s briefly before she looked out to the streetscape again. ‘Oh, no reason,’ she said unconvincingly.
Now I was worried. From the moment Dr Liebenberg had spoken of helping with a ‘situation’ it was obvious that I was signing up for something strange. What was this place on Lafayette? If I woke in a bathtub of ice without my kidneys, I was going to be seriously pissed.
Chapter Three
I wish I could say the beauty of the rustic building made me feel more optimistic about things, but I was tired, hungry and over it as we rode the elevator to the ninth floor. It opened directly opposite a set of rich mahogany doors with a gold 9A in the centre. Nikki walked towards the doors while I stood in place, widened eyes taking in the luxurious space. The white and grey marble floors gleamed, reflecting my totally inappropriate outfit choice back to me. The click of Nikki’s low heels bounced off the ornate high ceilings. I tried not to let my mouth gape, because, well, that would just be embarrassing.
Then I remembered, whatever the feeling churning inside me, I was in New York fucking City!
Nikki had already announced herself via the video intercom and now she confidently pushed the unlocked door and made her way through, leaving it open for me. She grinned as I followed her, sensing that I was rather taken aback by the scale of the apartment.
‘Three-and-a-half-thousand square feet, Brazilian hardwood flooring, twenty-six-foot-high ceilings, roof garden.’
‘Wow!’ I said.
‘If you think this is impressive, wait until you see the star attraction,’ she said, gesturing for me to climb the sweeping stairs that wrapped around the wall. As I ascended, my attention was diverted to the massive windows with their sweeping city views. I misstepped a few times and made sure to grip the balustrade to make the climb without serious injury. With a view like that I didn’t begrudge the detour anymore, I could sightsee from the apartment. The whole day had been a bit of a magical mystery tour; from Seventh Avenue Park Central Hotel, to a Turtle Bay Gardens brownstone to a Manhattan penthouse. Yeah, just another Monday.
On the landing of the second floor we were greeted by an older lady, the penthouse equivalent of the brownstone’s Frieda, except this woman seemed a little more guarded as her eyes swept me over.
Nikki slid off her scarf and handed it to the woman. ‘How is she?’ Nikki whispered, not an easy feat when she was trying her best to recover her breath from the ascent.
‘You shouldn’t be climbing those stairs, Miss Nikki, I will not be mopping up if your waters break. I could have come down to you.’
‘No, don’t wake her.’
‘She’s awake.’ The woman waved her words away as she went to the closest door.
Nikki’s eyes were alight when she looked at me. ‘Come,’ she said, and stepped into a nursery bigger than my parents’ lounge, dining, kitchen and bathroom combined. A light grey shaded the walls and was highlighted by white furniture and pink fabrics, and another giant window that overlooked the city. A rocking chair next to the window made for the most out-of-this-world nursing corner. I stood in the middle of the room, taking it all in, hardly believing that people could be born into such places. It was such a far cry from my world.
Nikki crept forward, peering into the white cot that had pride of place in the centre of the room. As she tucked her hair behind her ears, a beaming smile spread across her face. ‘Hello, beautiful,’ she crooned. ‘Look who’s awake.’
I walked closer, but before I could cover much distance, Nikki reached in and carefully lifted the baby from the cot. Bigger than a newborn and far more alert, at a guess the baby was three or four months old.
Nikki shifted her into her arms with well-practised ease. ‘Did you have a good sleep, Gracie girl?’
And almost as if on cue, the crinkled little pink face yawned. We all smiled, even the cranky maid, who watched from over Nikki’s shoulder.
Nikki looked at me, as if seeing me for the first time. ‘Now, Grace, I want you to meet someone very special.’
She came over to me, rocking the baby ever so gently.
‘This is Sarah. Don’t tell anyone, but she’s going to be your new au pair. You are going to be hanging out with her a lot, and she’s new to New York, so you’re going to have to take care of her, okay?’
Grace’s wild, roaming gaze shifted around the room, flitting from Nikki to the ceiling, and then my way – I could almost feel my heart tighten. A jet-black mop of hair and those blue-grey eyes I had seen before; the worldly, distinctive gaze of a Worthington.
I held out my hand, placing it in the little curve of her soft, wrinkled fingers. ‘Nice to meet you, Grace, I hope you can keep a secret.’ I smiled, admiring the perfect bow of her lips, and her button nose.
Nikki laughed. ‘Don’t worry, she won’t tell anyone.’
‘What? Not even me?’
A deep voice pulled our attention to the nursery door, where a man watched with interest. It wasn’t the shock of his voice or that he’d appeared out of nowhere that caused my breath to hitch in my throat. It was that his unnerving blue-grey eyes were looking right at me.
‘Hello, Ben,’ Nikki said, turning her attention back to Grace. ‘I thought you weren’t going to be in today.’
‘No such luck,’ the man said as he walked to the other side of the cot. His demeanour made Penny Worthington seem like Mary Poppins. He scooped a soft teddy from the mattress and looked at it thoughtfully.
‘You say that like you don’t want to see me,’ Nikki teased.
‘Just how often do you use this place as a drop-in centre?’
‘Can’t an aunty come see her favorite niece?’
My eyes shifted to Ben with a new interest as the penny finally dropped: this was Nikki’s brother, Ben Worthington. I quickly turned away when he looked at me, focusing on Grace, now fully awake and squirming in Nikki’s arms.
‘Don’t let Emily hear you say that,’ he said, his hardened eyes changing as he regarded his daughter. Love softened his face, transforming him, making him more human and no less handsome. His hair was dark, as were the circles under his eyes, and there was stubble along his jawline. His tall, lean frame was encased in an immaculate business suit, but his look was tempered by something unkempt. I tried to stop them, but my eyes kept straying back to him. I had never felt more awkward, but then it suddenly hit me: Grace was the ‘situation’, and I was to be the au pair for this little baby. Ben Worthington was my potential, rather intimidating, new boss; the one I was meant to meet tomorrow. He probably had no idea.
Until Nikki let the cat out of the bag.
‘Ben, this is Sarah, the one Mother has been grilling about the au pair position for Gracie.’
Ben’s eyes went from soft and lovely to harsh, flicking to me then to his sister.
Nikki read the change, and handed Grace over to the maid. ‘Ruth, can you take Gracie, please?’
Perhaps I should have been grateful that Nikki was on the receiving end of those eyes, but I felt even more uncomfortable when the siblings continued to speak as if I wasn’t there.
‘A little young, don’t you think?’ he said.
‘Don’t start, she is more than qualified. You read the profile.’
‘It’s just paper.’
‘Well, what are you going to do then, Ben, because you can’t keep up what you’re doing; it’s ridiculous. Ruth may be a wonderful housekeeper but she can’t be your nanny, too. Have you even held your daughter today?’
His rage was palpable. If looks could kill I would have been seriously concerned for Nikki’s safety. But she refused to back down, ignoring the vein that bulged in his neck.
‘Go home, Nikki, and worry about your own brood.’
Nikki breathed out a laugh. ‘You are just as selfish as Dad. Come on, Sarah, I’m sorry you had to witness this.’
I was more than happy to follow her out and get away from him. At lea
st I had clarity once and for all: come Thursday, I would fly home and write this off as an experience.
We had barely made it to the stairs when Ben’s voice stilled us.
‘I didn’t ask Sarah to go, just you.’
Nikki looked at me from the step below; she appeared as shocked as I was. ‘What?’ she asked.
Ben leant casually on the doorframe, sighing wearily and rubbing the stubble on his jawline. ‘Might as well get this over with, saves having Mother and Emily on my doorstep tomorrow.’
‘Yeah, well, nobody wants that,’ agreed Nikki. She stepped up to be level with my terrified expression. ‘I’ll wait for you downstairs, and then Dave can drive you back to the hotel,’ she told me.
‘I’ll make sure she gets home.’
‘It’s no trouble, I’ll wait,’ Nikki said adamantly.
‘I don’t know how long this will take.’
How long could it take for him to say I wasn’t suitable for the position? I could tell Nikki was thinking the same.
‘I’ll wait,’ she said pointedly.
Ben shook his head. ‘You’re stubborn as a mule.’
‘I could think of worse traits.’ Nikki turned to me. ‘Go on, I’ll be downstairs.’ She spoke like I was about to go off to war. Maybe I was.
As she started to descend the stairs, leaving me alone with Ben Worthington on the landing of his penthouse suite, I switched into another mode. Adopting a new bravery I turned and met his expectant stare, ready to hold out my hand and properly introduce myself, but I was curtly cut off.
‘This way,’ he said, pushing off the doorframe and stalking down the hall.
All I had to do was follow.
I really didn’t want to.
Chapter Four
I sat on one side of a large glass desk, illuminated by the sun that streamed in through the floor-to-ceiling windows. There was no way I could work in here, the view was far too distracting; and by ‘view’, I mean Ben Worthington. He sat opposite me, studying his computer screen, bringing up my credentials and, knowing his mother, a risk-assessment analysis report from a third-party specialist. As much as I had wanted my New York adventure, I was done. I was over the smiling and biting of my tongue as another set of cold grey eyes cast judgement on me. I just wanted to work, and I’d be great at it if they just took the brooms out of their arses and let me.
I blinked out of my thoughts and found Ben staring at me. His brow curved quizzically as he sat back in his ergonomic leather chair, linking his hands together over his chest.
‘You have something to say, Miss Williams?’
I felt like I was in the principal’s office, getting in trouble for schoolyard fighting. As much as I could appreciate there was a pecking order in the world, and when it came to this city I was on the bottom, I wanted it to be known that I was going to be a doormat for no man, woman or job. If that meant leaving on the next flight to go be a checkout chick at Coles then I was at peace with that.
‘Mr Worthington –’
‘Ben, call me Ben.’
I paused. Was that an olive branch of sorts? ‘Okay, but only if you call me Sarah.’
He nodded. ‘Agreed.’ I thought he might have found a little humour in the strangeness of our situation but apparently not.
It was weird. He couldn’t have been any more than early thirties and yet was so serious. I guess lighthearted whimsy didn’t equate to fatherhood responsibility and multimillion-dollar penthouses.
And then I thought, where was Mrs Ben Worthington in all this. Would we have to wait for her too? Or would that happen at interview 2.0? I didn’t think I could bear it. I noticed a few photo frames on the desk, but they were facing away from me.
‘Are we waiting on anyone else?’ I asked.
‘No, no one else,’ he said.
Okay, so he made the decisions in this family, that was no surprise.
‘Ben, I don’t want to seem ungrateful, but –’
‘You want a definite answer to the position.’
‘Well, yeah, that would be —’
‘Do you often have things just land at your feet, Sarah?’ he asked.
‘No,’ I said, a little taken aback.
‘Well, you graduated school and then happened to walk into the Liebenberg job pretty much straightaway, yes?’
‘Yes, I was fortunate to be able to use that as a stepping stone to work and continue my studies in early childcare and —’
‘So you’ve never really had to fight for anything you’ve wanted in life thus far?’
‘Um, am I being punished for having it easy? Because I assure you, despite what your pieces of paper say about my so-called character profile or case study or whatever, you don’t know me or my capabilities at all.’
‘Are you saying Dr Liebenberg’s recommendations are not accurate?’
‘I dare say that it doesn’t matter what I or Dr Liebenberg say, I think you already have your mind made up.’
‘You think so?’
‘Yes, I do. I think you and your mother and your sister have it all figured out, and I’m sure that I will have nothing to do with you or Grace.’
Ben swivelled in his chair as he watched me increasingly lose my patience; him sitting there so cocky only fuelled my fire.
‘And furthermore …’ Oh God, ‘furthermore’? I was on a roll, all right. ‘I may be young, and not a part of any elite dynasty in my country or yours, but I can look after Grace, I can care for her, protect her, love and nurture her through every milestone because I have done it before and I know I can do it again. Whether it be in New York City or Timbuktu, I’ll always bring my A game, and whoever doesn’t want that as a part of their child’s life, well, I think that says more about them as a parent than it does about me as a carer.’
Holy shit, did I really just say that? Did I just question his parenting skills? Someone hand me the hammer and nails for my coffin.
Ben glowered at me, deeply unimpressed by my speech. ‘Well, Sarah, I think I have learned all I need to know. I’ll see you out.’
‘No, it’s all right, I can see myself out,’ I said, quickly standing, ready to get the hell out of there. If I never set eyes on another Worthington again it would be too soon.
Regardless of my rather adamant request, Ben took it upon himself to walk me to the door. He opened it and stood aside. ‘Well, I hope you’ve had some time to see the sights at least.’
I paused, annoyed that now he opted for small talk. ‘I’m booked into my hotel till Thursday, so I have a few days.’
Ben shook his head. ‘No, that won’t work.’
‘I know it’s not much but I thought if I got a hop-on, hop-off bus ticket I could pretty much cover a fair amount of ground —’
‘I’m going out of town tomorrow so if you check out by seven tomorrow morning, Dave can pick you up and I can do an induction before I leave for the airport.’
‘Sorry, but what are you talking about?’
Ben paused, a small, knowing smile creasing the corner of his mouth. It was the first time I had seen him express any form of humour and, no matter how arrogant it was, it suited him.
‘You start work tomorrow, Sarah.’
‘What?’ Sure that I had heard him wrong, I stepped through the doorway. I turned back and met his amused expression.
‘You’re hired,’ he said, before closing the door and leaving me to pick my bottom jaw up from the floor.
‘Wow, just wow,’ was all that Nikki could repeat over and over again. She was still in a state of shock.
‘I don’t like the fact you’re so surprised,’ I said, stirring the ice in my Coca-Cola as we sat in a booth at the bar in my hotel.
‘What? Oh no, it’s just that we tried a kind of intervention before you came aboard and it was an absolute disaster. Ben tends to rebel against any form of forced solution so today was a massive victory. What on earth did you say to him?’
‘I didn’t say much to him; if anything, I questioned his abilit
y as a parent.’
Nikki spat her drink across the table, then coughed so hard and long she earned alarmed looks from the other patrons.
‘Jesus, Nikki,’ I said, patting her on the back.
Her eyes watered. ‘You said what?’
‘Oh, look, I can’t remember, but it couldn’t have been that bad or I would be booking that forty-eight-hour hop-on, hop-off ticket for the tourist bus right now.’
My little joke was lost on Nikki as she took a small sip of water, trying to clear her throat. She looked at me intently. ‘Listen, Sarah. It’s not for me to say this, but I feel that I need to at least give you a heads up before you start working for Ben.’
I swallowed, crazy theories running through my head: He’s a serial killer on parole and wears an ankle bracelet. He’s a cult leader who believes he’s the second coming of Christ.
‘Just don’t ask any personal questions,’ she said. ‘And don’t judge him if he isn’t the father you might expect or want him to be for Grace.’
I didn’t know what to say to that, and I desperately wanted to ask a question but knew it was against Worthington policy. But wasn’t I entitled to know a little more about the situation I was stepping into?
‘What happened? I mean, for there to be so much secrecy.’
Nikki smiled sadly. ‘Doesn’t every family have skeletons in its closet?’
Chapter Five
It was finally happening.
I thought perhaps the reality would sink in once I put my suitcase near my hotel door, but it didn’t. I was still waiting on the phone call from Penny Worthington to say there had been a miscommunication and my services would not be required. So, as much fun as it was to be sitting in my room immersed in paranoia and unable to sleep, what better way to combat that than to wander the streets of the city that never slept?
I had chosen my hotel purely for the location. Turn left and you were at Central Park; turn right and you were at Times Square – the best of both worlds. Considering it was night time, I chose to turn toward Times Square, where the night seemed like day anyway, flooded with an array of lights, billboards, speakers, screens, and foot traffic. I couldn’t wait.