“Are you all ready to order?” Not exactly my friendliest greeting, but I was flustered.
“We don’t even have menus yet,” the guy sitting on the end of the booth said. He sat across from Cole and next to the other guy who . . . looked identical to him. Asking if they were twins would have been a wasted question.
“We don’t have menus. We serve two different crepes every day. Today’s sweet and savory are listed over there on the chalkboard.” I pointed to the opposite wall and tried to focus on the guy seething in silence in front of me. I swear you would have thought he was getting his toenails pulled out with pliers from the twisted look on his face.
“Hold up,” the other twin spoke up. “You’re a restaurant that only serves two things that change every day?”
Wasn’t that just what I’d said?
“Yep.”
“And what the hell’s a . . . crepe?” the first twin asked, studying the chalkboard with narrowed eyes.
“Like a thin French pancake that melts in your mouth,” I rattled off, having said it a million times before. Any kind of cuisine even slightly out of the ordinary took a little getting used to around these parts. Complete with a layman’s explanation.
The twin against the wall gave me a sly smile. “I’ve never heard food described in such a sexy ass way,”—he wagged his brows, as well—“coming from the mouth of a sexy ass waitress too.”
“Matt,” Cole finally spoke, “shut the fuck up.”
Matt’s face pinched with confusion. “You just keep getting pissier by the minute, Carson. Why don’t you find yourself a local to screw and get it out of your system?”
One corner of Cole’s mouth twitched. “The screwing or almost-screwing of locals is what made me ‘pissy’ in the first place,” he said, flicking a quick glance my way. It was all ice. “But I’m about to move from pissy to full-on pissed if you don’t shut your trap.”
“Forgive my friend . . .” Matt waved his hand, inspecting my dress. I assumed he was looking for a name tag, although his inspection wasn’t brief.
“Elle,” I said, crossing my arms. Matt continued to stare at my chest, making me every kind of uncomfortable.
Matt winked. “Forgive my friend, Elle,” he repeated. “It’s his time of the month. Just ignore him.”
That was in no way possible. Ignoring Cole was like trying to ignore a firework going off six inches from your face.
“But me,” his smile stretched, “I don’t think I could let you ignore me even if you tried.”
Cole made some sort of grunt under his breath. I had guests that needed refills, orders that needed run, and new orders to take. Every second I stayed here, I got ten seconds behind. Being near Cole when he was in this kind of a dark mood wasn’t what I’d describe as pleasant, but it was better than being away from him.
So I stayed and played along with Matt since the guy I wanted to talk to looked like he’d rather ignore me for the rest of time.
“I don’t know,” I said. “I’m really good at ignoring people.”
Matt chuckled, grinning wider that I’d taken the conversation bait.
“Yes, yes, you are.” I had to look to confirm that hard voice was coming from Cole. “Ignoring, avoiding, running away in the middle of the night . . .”
“Hey, Mr. PMS,” Matt said, swatting the air in Cole’s direction. “Stop interrupting with your mumbles. I’m trying to make an impression.”
If looks could kill, Matt would be gone in his next life too.
“My name’s Matt Johnson. And yes, the last name is an indicator of how impressive,”—his eyebrows filled in the blanks—“mine is. In case you’re wondering which twin’s better, let me break it down for you. I drive a nicer truck, I’m the better looking one,”—he appraised his identical twin brother and curled his nose—“obviously, and my dick’s bigger, too.”
Matt’s twin jabbed his elbow into his ribs. “That’s not what your last girlfriend said.”
Matt ignored his brother’s come back. “Oh yeah,” he said, smiling like the devil, “and I jump out of fucking planes to save sweet baby Bambis from going up in flames.”
This guy was entertaining. I gave him high marks for that, but he was in no way what I was attracted to.
As I glanced at who I was attracted to, glaring, clenched fists, anger rolling off of him in waves, I wondered if I needed to reevaluate what attracted me.
“Your point?” I asked, quirking my head to the side.
Matt tilted his head back at me. “You wanna fuck sometime? I’m free tonight.”
Cole’s arms flew across the table and grabbed Matt’s collar before I could shriek in surprise. Cole’s nose was all but billowing smoke, but Matt only looked marginally intimidated. This must have been a regular occurrence between these two.
“Dammit, Matt. Shut the hell up,” Cole said, shoving Matt back against the booth hard. “Or else I’ll slit your ‘chute while you’re asleep.”
“Touchy,” Matt muttered, adjusting his collar and tossing a sugar packet at Cole’s chest. “What’s got your jumpsuit in a bunch?”
Cole’s eyes flicked to me and that was all Matt needed.
“Holy shit! Well done, Carson. Why didn’t you just tell me you’ve staked your claim?” Matt’s meaty arm reached across the table and clapped down on Cole’s shoulder.
Cole brushed Matt’s hand away. “I haven’t staked a claim on her,” he said. “And I don’t want one either. I don’t want anything from her.” Those darkened eyes swept back to me, and the look in them, combined with the hurtful words, had me stepping away.
“Hey, just ignore these two. This one’s always an ass,” the quiet twin finally spoke up, hitching his thumb in his brother’s direction. “And this one’s been in an insanely bad mood all morning.” He smiled at me. Although he and Matt were twins, their faces looked totally different when they smiled. “Before you run away and don’t come back because of the douche sitting to my right and dumbass in front of me, would you take our orders?”
I nodded, but refused to look in Cole’s direction. The way he treated me was especially hurtful after last night.
“Could you bring us three coffees and three crepes? Whichever one you think’s the best?”
I nodded again, taking another step back. I could see, from the corner of my eye, Cole’s head turning my way.
“And I’m Liam, by the way. Dani said to tell you hi.” This time, his smile was paired with the faintest coloring on his cheeks. I wasn’t sure if that was because he was smitten with Dani or because of the nasty things she’d likely done to him, but I was impressed. For once, Dani had definitely chosen the better of two brothers.
“I’ll bring your coffees right over,” I said, heading towards the drink station.
“We won’t hold our breaths,” I heard Cole say after me.
I spun on my heels. Now this was getting to be too much. I didn’t know what I’d done to deserve such disdain, but I was getting tired of it. Especially when it seemed he’d sought me out just so he could pour it on thick.
“You know, just in case you forget about us when you turn your back and walk away.”
Whatever I was about to snap back was drowned in the wake of those words.
Trying to keep from wincing, I trudged over to pour three coffees. The spring in my step was long gone. None of us spoke when I dropped the coffee cups in front of them, other than Liam saying thanks for them all and Matt scoping out my cleavage when I leaned over to set his in front of him. Cole remained silent. At least verbally he did, but his body and eyes said so many harsh things I couldn’t scurry away quickly enough.
After placing their order with Sid, I rushed through the dining room, trying to catch up. By the time Sid had the guys’ order ready, most of the breakfast diners were gone or on their way out. I missed the distraction a full restaurant provided. Refusing to look anywhere but at the wall behind their table, I carried their crepes across the diner. After settling the plates into
position, I asked, “Can I get you anything else?”
“It’s been a few days since I’ve had a blowjob,” Matt piped up, looking at me expectantly.
Another elbow to the ribs from Liam. “No, we’re good. Thanks, Elle.”
Shooting a quick glare at Matt, I turned and walked away. I didn’t want to visit that table again. The bill was on me. Just eat, get out, and stop making me feel like I’d committed the worst crime known to man.
“I think you might have forgotten about me.” Cole’s voice carried through the almost empty diner. “Not the first time, I know, but still . . .”
Spinning back around, I glanced at the empty space on the table in front of him, then shrugged. “Didn’t you just mention that you didn’t want anything from me ever again?” I said, checking the diner to make sure no one was paying us any attention. “Looks like we’re off to a good start then.”
Liam had the decency to hide his smile, but Matt burst into laughter. “Whoa. Carson.” He punched Cole’s arm. “What the hell happened between you two because please, for the love of God, if and when you two get some wild makeup sex on, call me so I can get the video camera rollin’.”
My small smile of vindication fell when Cole looked at me. He was smiling, but it wasn’t the friendly, warm kind. “Nothing,” he said, looking away from me like he never wanted to look at me again. “Nothing at all happened between Elle and me. A whole lot of nothing.”
I rushed to the back room before the first tear fell and I stayed back there until long after the table in the back was empty.
Sunday nights in the summer.
It was date night at the bowling alley. Logan and I had gone on our first date there, and over the past couple summers, the group had grown from two to about twenty. Most were Logan’s friends from high school and baseball, but Dani usually tagged along too. If she didn’t have anywhere else to be. Or anyone to do.
After my shift at the diner had ended, I drove as far as my Jeep would take me up some logging road, then I got out and hiked until my mind was empty. It took a while today before I reached that empty feeling, but that wasn’t much of a surprise after everything that had taken place.
I’d managed to miss Dad after returning home to shower and change, and by the time I pulled into the parking lot of the bowling alley, the therapeutic benefits of that three mile hike had vanished. I tried not to dwell on Cole’s looks and words from that morning, but I couldn’t seem to focus on anything else.
My stomach hurt. My heart hurt. My head hurt. I could cure the stomach and head hurt easily enough, but didn’t know of a quick way to fix a heart ache.
Telling myself to put on my big girl panties and suck it up, I went inside the bowling alley. As much as I wanted to curl up in my bed, I couldn’t avoid Logan any longer. After the whole “Elle’s Missing!” fiasco last night, I’d been lucky I could reassure him over the phone when he called after church. He had about a million and one questions for me, but after saying I was fine for the million and one’th time, he calmed down and let me off the phone when I said I had to get back to work. He wanted to get together after my shift, but I told him I had plans. He let it go and said he looked forward to seeing me tonight.
He was getting suspicious. While that irritated me, he was right to be.
I’d let some man who hated me today touch me last night in ways Logan wouldn’t even dream of.
I was almost convinced I never wanted to see Cole Carson’s face again, but then I remembered the way it had looked that first day we met at the swimming hole and I knew I’d die a slow death if I never did see it again.
Logan, Dani, a handful of his teammates, and another handful of girls we’d either graduated or gone to school with were laughing and tying on their shoes, taking up half of the bowling alley.
I rolled my shoulders back and pretended life was great. I’d never been happier or more confident with the direction it was taking.
Yeah. That confidence booster fizzled flat.
Logan noticed me first as I made my way to the crowd. He patted the guy he’d been talking with on the arm and came towards me. His arms were already open before he’d made it halfway.
“Hey,” he said, sounding concerned as he tucked me close. Those familiar arms, the ones I’d felt around me hundreds of times, didn’t disappoint. I melted into him a little and pushed the differences in how Cole held me aside. That was all a moot point anyways. “You don’t look so good,” he whispered, rubbing the middle of my back.
“I don’t feel so good,” I replied, burrowing my head down deeper into his shirt. Inhaling that familiar smell of soap and leather. It didn’t matter how many times Logan showered, he always smelled a bit like the leather of his baseball glove.
“You want to talk about it?”
I did. I didn’t.
But I needed to.
“Yeah,” I said. “How about afterwards?”
Logan nodded. “Okay. Whenever you want.”
Might as well get it out in the open tonight. What I’d done with Cole, the fool I’d been to think there was this deep, earth-shattering thing between us. No matter if I wanted to marry Logan or call it off tomorrow, I needed to tell him. He deserved to know the truth.
I didn’t let myself think about the repercussions of telling him. I would have been paralyzed if I did, so I just focused on one step at a time.
“I was so worried about you last night when your dad called.” His arms tightened around me.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset anyone.” That was true. However, my actions told a different story.
“Where were you?” he asked. “I searched all our normal places. I was just heading towards the old swimming hole on your Grandma M’s land when your dad called and let me know you’d made it back.”
That would have been ideal in the worst possible way. Logan stumbling on a half-naked, sleeping Cole, demanding to know if he’d seen his girlfriend, Elle Montgomery. Cole smirking at him with a sleepy smile and saying something about how he had seen her recently. She’d just been curled around him moaning his name.
“I just needed to . . . get away,” I answered him.
“From what?”
From you was my knee-jerk response, but it wasn’t only from him. I wanted to get away from myself, too. From the person I’d become thanks to letting everyone else make the decisions in my life.
The longer my thoughts went down this path, the closer I got to tears. The heavier the guilt weighed down on my back. The closer I got to telling him where I’d been last night and, more importantly, what I’d been doing.
I was about to open my mouth when a finger poked my shoulder. “I’d tell you two to get a room if I actually thought you’d use it the way it was meant to be used.” Dani’s voice was unmistakable. “And abused.”
I heard the eyebrow pop in her voice, promptly followed by Logan’s long sigh. He tolerated Dani because she was my best friend, but that was the only reason. He wouldn’t have said two words to her if it wasn’t for me because Logan and Dani were about as opposite as two people could get. And no, the irony that my best friend and my boyfriend were polar opposites was not lost on me.
“Mind if I borrow your blushing bride for a minute?” Dani didn’t wait for Logan’s reply before she gave my arm a swift tug.
I went with her because I was too tired to fight. I gave Logan an apologetic shrug, but his attention was already being taken over by one of his teammates. Like that, I was forgotten.
Or at least that’s the way it felt.
“Hey, friend,” Dani said, cordoning us off to the side. “Or should I call you stupid, stupid girl?”
When Dani was on the rampage, it was best just to let her get it out of her system.
“Please, for the love of women everywhere, please tell me you weren’t just about to tell Logan you’ve been playing with the fire hose of one of the new smokejumpers in town?”
My mouth dropped. Somewhere around the fire hose part.
<
br /> “Please confirm you are not that stupid,” she said, snapping her fingers in front of my face when I remained quiet. “Anytime now.”
“What are you talking—”
“No,” Dani snapped, looking insulted. “Don’t you dare do that to me. Don’t play the innocent card with me. I know what’s been going on and I’m hurt that you’d think by confessing your sins to me I’d tell someone or think any less of you.”
“Liam,” I muttered, not so sure I was such a fan of him anymore. “What did he tell you?”
“The things my best friend should have been the one to tell me,” she said, shoving my arm. “What the hell, Elle? You start having some thing with a guy so damn hot he makes me come just by looking at him and I’m the last to know?” She shoved my arm again. “Not cool.”
I sighed, glancing over at Logan laughing with his teammates. Oblivious. “Not the last to know . . .”
Dani sighed with me. “Damn, Elle. What are you going to do?”
I studied Logan’s face. Really took him in. He was a good man, I knew that, but was he supposed to be my good man?
“I’m going to tell him. Soon.”
“Good, it’s about time you called it quits with zero-sex-appeal boy,” she said, curling her nose. “But I was referring to Cole. What are you going to do about him?”
Hearing his name hurt my heart, too. Thinking about him, remembering him, longing for him, and now, hearing his name. Pain, pain, and more pain.
“After the way he acted this morning?” I almost shivered remembering it. “I’m going to do my best to avoid him. He obviously hates me and wants nothing to do with me.” I bit the side of my cheek to keep from welling up.
Dani’s eyebrows went sky high. “You think Cole hates you?” she said, grabbing my elbows and giving me a little shake. “You think Cole hates you.” This time, it wasn’t a question. It was more a statement uttered to make me feel like an idiot.
“No. I know he does.” I glanced over at the rest of the group longingly. I’d rather be heaving a ball down a lane than having this conversation with Dani right now.
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