He had an utterly devastating smile, she thought, vexed at her own response. But no doubt he was well aware of his appeal, how irresistible he was to women.
When he picked up the reins and gave his grays the office to move forward, Lily held her breath, only letting it out when his lordship drove off. She was vastly relieved by his departure, but dismayed by his promise to return.
She was still watching his retreat when Tess’s voice broke into her distracted thoughts.
“Do you plan to tell me what that was all about, Lily? I trust you had good reason for your incivility.”
With a start, Lily offered her friend an apologetic look, having forgotten Tess was even there. “Indeed, I had good reason. I warned him that Winifred was doing her best to pair us together, but he completely disregarded my warning.”
“What happened between you last night?”
“Well…” Lily hesitated. She would rather not have to confess about her wantonness in the stable loft with the marquess, yet she didn’t like to keep secrets from her dear friend. “I encountered his lordship just before I left the ball with you. I had drunk three glasses of champagne because I was feeling sad at losing Arabella, so I’m afraid I was rather foxed when he found me.”
Tess’s gaze sharpened. “He didn’t try to take advantage of you?”
“No…not exactly. But I may have tried to take advantage of him.” Her mouth curved ruefully. “I wasn’t thinking too clearly at the time. I fear I acted something of a wanton and gave Claybourne the mistaken impression that I am lacking in morals. And you saw the result this morning. I don’t want him presuming he can add me to his long list of conquests.”
“I imagine his intentions are more honorable than that,” Tess replied with dry amusement. “He drove all this way to pay you a formal morning call. A gentleman doesn’t do that if he has a nefarious purpose in mind.”
“He does have a nefarious purpose in mind.” Lily retorted. “You heard him just now. He intends to court me!”
Tess pursed her lips as if biting back a smile. “Lily, there is nothing criminal about him wanting to become better acquainted with you.”
“There is if he thinks our closer acquaintance will lead to marriage.”
Tess laughed outright at that, which made Lily grind her teeth. “This is not at all funny, Tess!”
“Actually it is, dearest. Not that Claybourne may be in the market for a wife, but that he seems willing to consider you for the position. If he knew your feelings on the subject of matrimony-”
“He does know my feelings. I told him so last night in no uncertain terms.”
Tess’s expression sobered. “Would it be so terrible to entertain his suit for a time? You are limiting your future significantly if you won’t even consider the possibility of marriage.”
Lily grimaced. “You only think so because you are a hopeless romantic-which I am not.”
“He seems extremely charming.”
“He is that.” And much too seductive, Lily added to herself. Yet she had an entirely different plan for her future than marriage. A plan that did not include becoming the chattel of a husband, putting herself under his lawful control. Besides, no matter how charming and seductive and handsome a gentleman might appear on the surface, looks could be highly deceiving-as her own father had conclusively proved.
“Lord Claybourne’s charm is entirely beside the point,” Lily stated resolutely. “Nothing could tempt me to wed him, so there is no reason for him even to try to court me.”
“So what do you mean to do about him then? I seriously doubt a man like Claybourne will give up easily.”
That question stumped Lily. “I have no earthly idea.” She had never encountered this sort of predicament, having to deal with a nobleman who might actually wish to marry her.
“Well,” Tess commented at her silence, “I must go for now, Lily. As you said, I am dreadfully late for my appointment. But I promise I will return later and help you sort this all out.”
“Yes, go, please. Your meeting is much more important.”
Tess spent most of her time doing charitable works, focusing her efforts primarily on the Families of Fallen Soldiers, since she had tragically lost her betrothed to war two years ago at Waterloo. And she was currently occupied in persuading the local gentry to contribute to her cause.
When Tess had gone, Lily picked up her valise and his lordship’s gift basket and turned to mount the front steps of the manor.
Recalling her friend’s amused response to the prospect of Claybourne courting her, Lily shook her head in consternation. The notion might indeed have been humorous if it wasn’t so alarming.
She knew she would be too vulnerable to him if she remained here at Danvers Hall while Arabella and Marcus were away on their monthlong wedding journey. Dealing with a nobleman like Claybourne was beyond her experience. He was completely, dangerously unlike any man she had ever known, with his easy smile, his heart-stirring charm, his breathtaking sensuality.
Yet she was not about to sit here waiting to be the victim of his unwanted courtship. She had to take action. If for no other reason than to prove that she was her own woman, in control of her own destiny.
Come now, be honest with yourself, a nagging voice in Lily’s head chided. You are afraid you will let your reckless nature lead you astray. That you will surrender to his unquestionable allure.
A pained smile tugged at her mouth. That was the real trouble, Lily acknowledged unwillingly. The deplorable truth was, she didn’t trust her ability to resist Lord Claybourne if he became her suitor. He would simply be too tempting.
Perhaps she would do well to leave home for a time. But where to go? Now that she had ample funds, she could pay a visit to her former neighbors and friends in Hampshire, but she had little desire to travel all that distance and be compelled to remain away from home like a fugitive.
What about going to London to stay with Fanny? Not Fanny’s main residence where she plied her courtesan trade, of course. But she owned a boardinghouse in London… Coincidentally, they had discussed it just last night at the wedding ball.
Lily frowned as she let herself in the front entrance door. Fanny had not been her usual vivacious self at the ball, and when pressed, she’d confessed that she was worried about two of her close friends who were having financial difficulties.
Lily had pondered their problem during her sleepless night of tossing and turning, but she hadn’t come up with any bright ideas for earning nearly thirty thousand pounds.
Perhaps by going to London, she might help Fanny determine a way to aid her friends, and solve her own problem of eluding Lord Claybourne at the same time.
It certainly deserved some serious consideration, Lily decided as she turned her valise and basket over to a footman and went in search of her sister Roslyn.
She found Roslyn in the morning room, cataloging the vast array of wedding gifts the guests had sent to the Earl of Danvers and his new countess, Arabella. Fortunately, Roslyn professed to be perfectly fine after her ordeal.
Despite her assurances, however, Lily wished she could have been there to help her sister last night, especially since she was probably better able to face down an armed highwayman. She at least knew how to fire a pistol with fair accuracy…although she was well aware that Roslyn’s delicate golden looks were deceptive. There was a vein of fine steel in her sister’s elegant aristocratic spine. And according to Winifred, Roslyn had comported herself with remarkable courage, saving her ladyship from being robbed of one particularly cherished piece of jewelry.
“It sounds as if you were very brave,” Lily said after hearing Roslyn’s abbreviated version of the tale.
“I was frightened out of my mind,” Roslyn replied dryly. “But at least no one was harmed.”
“Except for the brigand. I understand Winifred’s bailiff has initiated a search for a wounded man.”
Roslyn nodded. “Yes, although we don’t hold out much hope of finding him.” She s
tudied Lily in turn. “Are you certain you are all right, Lily? You look as if something has upset you.”
Though knowing her cheeks were still flushed from her encounter with Lord Claybourne, Lily decided not to confide the reason for her high color. Roslyn had enough to worry her, recovering from a highway robbery after nearly being shot. And she had worked her fingers to the bone for weeks, planning and preparing for Arabella’s wedding celebrations.
And admittedly, Lily thought with a tinge of guilt, she didn’t want to confess about her foolish lapse in judgment last night. After all her vows of never wanting anything to do with eligible noblemen, it smacked of hypocrisy to have enjoyed Lord Claybourne’s stunning kisses so much.
“I am not upset,” Lily replied. “I merely have a touch of the headache, and having Tess drive me home in her gig didn’t help.”
She told her sister about getting foxed on champagne, leaving out the part about being in the stable loft afterward.
But as usual, Roslyn was too perceptive. “Is that all that is wrong, Lily?”
She bit back a sigh, knowing she would have to offer some valid explanation. “Well, perhaps not all. Winifred is still driving me to distraction with her maddening attempts at matchmaking.”
“I know,” Roslyn agreed wholeheartedly. “I was her target last night and again this morning. You were right about her wanting to pair me with Arden. It was mortifying in the extreme.”
“Well, I don’t intend to remain here to become Winifred’s hapless victim,” Lily said, coming to a decision. “I mean go to London and stay at Fanny’s lodging house. She has room, and she has asked my advice in dealing with two of her friends who operate the house. I don’t know if I can help them, but I would like to try.”
Roslyn stared at her in surprise. “You intend to hide out in London in order to elude Winifred’s matchmaking schemes? Are such drastic measures really necessary?”
Lily returned a wry grimace. “I am beginning to think so. If I can’t be found, then I needn’t worry about any unwanted suitors, do I? I cannot stay here in Chiswick, obviously. And no one will think to look for me at Fanny’s place, including Marcus. You know he would not approve of my intimacy with her scandalous friends.”
And Lord Claybourne will never find me there either. Relieved by the notion, Lily suddenly thought of another way to throw the marquess off her track and instantly felt more cheerful. “I have it! You can tell Winifred and anyone else who inquires that I have gone to Hampshire to visit friends at our old home.”
Roslyn’s brows drew together in puzzlement. “Why would you want her to think-”
She cut off her sister, not wanting to admit how irresistible she found the marquess. “Please, Rose, just humor me this once.”
Roslyn’s gaze became searching. “Lily…is there more you aren’t telling me?”
“Not at all. Don’t worry about me, dearest. It is nothing I cannot handle.” Lily smiled reassuringly before adding under her breath, “I simply have absolutely no intention of allowing any man to court me, let alone wed me.”
She had held that adamant view since she was sixteen, Lily reflected when eventually she left her sister and went upstairs to her bedchamber to unpack her valise and then pack again for an unexpected visit to London.
She’d sworn she would never let herself become so vulnerable-to be helplessly trapped in matrimony, at the mercy of her husband’s whims, unable to escape. If a woman married, she legally belonged to her husband; she was his property to treat as brutally as he pleased. She would never give any man that power over her, Lily vowed.
Nor would she ever give her heart away, only to have it cruelly crushed, the way her mother had done in her first marriage, and as Arabella had done in her first, short-lived betrothal.
Thankfully, Arabella seemed to have a genuine chance for love and happiness with Marcus now, Lily admitted to herself, remembering the gentleness in their hands when they touched each other, the tender look in their eyes when they shared loving glances. And her mother professed to have finally found happiness in her second marriage with her French lover, Henri Vachel.
As far as Lily was concerned, however, marriage was an odious word. She doubted she would ever overcome her lack of faith in men.
And she didn’t need anyone but her sisters and her friends to be happy. She was mistress of her own life and content to stay that way forever. She knew what she wanted for her future, and it was not being shackled to a husband who would hurt her and betray her and use his power against her and make her so miserable that she cried into her pillow every night, the way her father had done her mother.
And now that she had her own modest fortune, Lily reminded herself, she could indulge in her long-held dreams. From the time she could read, she had pored over history tomes and geological maps and expedition accounts, in part as a way to escape her parents’ battles. She had longed for the day when she could take control of her life; when she could fulfill her desire to travel the world and explore unknown lands and experience new adventures.
Oh, she might have someday liked to have children to love and cherish, but she would leave that to Arabella, and perhaps Roslyn. For herself, Lily was satisfied with teaching at the Freemantle Academy for Young Ladies, molding girls on the cusp of womanhood to stand up for themselves, despite their merchant-class origins, and providing them with skills to compete in the haughty world of the ton.
She had few duties at the Academy during the summer term, however, since most of the pupils had returned home to their families. So this was an ideal time to go to London-in more ways than one.
Most definitely she would be glad to escape Lord Claybourne’s unwanted attentions. And she would find it very satisfying if she could help Fanny’s fellow Cyprians solve their financial problems.
Just as gratifying, Lily reflected with a small frisson of pleasure, she would be starting a brand new chapter in her life. Now that the wedding celebrations were finally over, she could begin charting her own course for a life of freedom and adventure.
By the time Tess arrived and joined Lily in her bedchamber, she had written a note to Fanny, which she’d sent off to London by messenger, and had nearly finished packing.
“Roslyn doesn’t seem to have suffered from her ordeal, thankfully,” Tess said, taking a seat in a side chair. “But she tells me you are planning an excursion to London.”
“Yes,” Lily replied as she rummaged through her wardrobe for the final items she would need for an extended stay. “I mean to leave this afternoon.”
“Surely that is a bit rash-fleeing home so you can escape Lord Claybourne’s attentions.”
“Not at all. But in truth, I have another very good reason to go. Fanny is in a bit of financial difficulty.”
Tess frowned. “What sort of difficulty?”
“It is a matter of gambling debts, although not Fanny’s. This past spring two of her oldest courtesan friends lost enormous sums at the Faro tables, and the gaming hell owner is demanding repayment now. Fanny is trying to keep her friends out of debtors’ prison, or worse.”
“You are speaking of Fleur and Chantel?”
“Yes. They took Fanny under their wing when she first came to London eight years ago, so she is not about to abandon them.” Lily glanced back at Tess. “I didn’t want to mention their troubles to Roslyn, for then she would feel obliged to get involved, and she deserves to rest after all her endeavors. But I hope to help Fanny myself.”
Tess’s frown deepened. “And you intend to stay at Fanny’s rooming house? Lily, that place is little more than a home for lightskirts, run by two famous Cyprians.”
“I suppose so.”
Fleur Delee and Chantel Amour had been the most celebrated courtesans of their day, but they had passed their prime long ago and were now in their sixth decade. When their careers had waned and they’d had difficulty supporting themselves, Fanny had bought a large mansion to provide them a home. Not wanting to be a burden, they offset expenses by
taking in boarders, mainly other members of the demimonde.
“But that,” Lily explained, “is precisely why their boardinghouse could be an ideal hiding place for me. Claybourne is unlikely to find me there. And if he should happen to learn where I’ve gone”-Lily smiled a little-“I expect he will be too scandalized to discover me living with lightskirts to want me for his future marchioness.”
Tess shook her head in exasperation. “You could be asking for trouble.”
That comment made Lily laugh. “I wouldn’t mind a bit of trouble to enliven my life. Indeed, that is part of my plan’s charm. I mean to look upon it as an adventure…the first of many, I hope.”
“You couldn’t find another adventure besides taking up with Fanny’s notorious friends?”
Lily arched an eyebrow. “You don’t expect me to keep away from them because of any prudish notions I ought to have?”
“I suspect,” Tess said dryly, “there isn’t a prudish bone in your body. But aren’t you the least concerned about your reputation?”
“Not overmuch. I doubt I will be recognized, since I know few people in London. And I intend to remain as inconspicuous as possible.”
“I should hope so. Advertising your presence there would not be good for your sisters-or for your continued career at the Academy, either.”
“Indeed. So I must keep my location a secret. I will take refuge there and tell the world I have gone to visit my former home in Hampshire. Only you and Roslyn will know where I truly am. Certainly I don’t want Winifred to know.”
“You intend to deceive her?” Tess asked in surprise.
Lily’s smile turned rueful. “I fear I have no choice. Otherwise she will doubtless tell the marquess I am in London, and then he will likely call on me there, and I don’t want to have to deal with him. So you must help Winifred misdirect him and throw him off my trail.”
Tess finally laughed. “Very well, if you insist. But just remember, I warned you. Is there anything I may do to help you prepare?”
“No, thank you. But you and Roslyn could handle my few classes at the Academy, if you don’t mind?”
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