“No.” She tried to stop him, but Adam came up behind her, grabbing her wrists and holding them over her head. “Stop it. You’re hurting me.”
Adam didn’t seem to care, releasing her just long enough for Zac to pull the sweatshirt off and toss it aside. The moment he loosened his grip Neve jerked her arms back and tried to twist away. Adam caught her around the waist, holding her tightly, her back to his front. “You always threaten to call your brother, but you never do.” He leaned down to her ear, whispering, “I’m guessing you don’t want him to know the truth about his baby sister, you bad girl.”
She wasn’t a bad girl. Not anymore.
Forcing her arms down to her sides, Adam held her on display. Fury mixed with fear, but Neve kept her cool, knowing Nate would be there soon. Adam she could handle. He was big but slow, and not all that bright. This other guy, however…and two against one…If they were to overpower her there’d be nothing she could do to stop them.
“Damn, you were right,” Zac said. “She does have some pretty little titties.” He pinched her nipples through her cotton tank. They hardened. Neve hated that her body responded to his touch and tried to knee him in his nuts. Apparently used to that response from women, he blocked her attempt easily. “Now, that wasn’t nice.” He smiled. “Looks like someone needs a nice hard spanking.”
To hell with that—Neve fought Adam’s hold. Quick as a flash he turned her to face him, wrapping his huge arms around her, tight, dragging her wrists behind her back. “That’s right, baby. You know I like it when you fight.”
Yeah. He did. Damn it. But that’d been role-playing, this was real. “I’m not playing, Adam. I’m serious. Let me go.”
“Say it louder. Try to twist away.”
Apparently the lines between role-play and reality had vanished. She tried the rational approach. “I said no. I don’t want to have sex with you or Zac. Now please leave.”
“Sorry.” Transferring her wrists into one of his unusually large hands, moving them to her side, he held them firmly, his free hand on her ass, pulling her against his enormous erection. “I promised Zac.”
“I am not yours to promise,” Neve yelled, struggling.
Zac pushed up against her back, sandwiching her between their large bodies.
“Remember, I get the ass,” Adam said, as if they’d prenegotiated her body parts.
“No one gets my ass.”
“You’re going to like it,” Adam insisted. A big hand slid beneath the elastic waistband of her pants, down inside the back of her underwear, a thick finger traveled between her cheeks, probing for entrance where no man had gone before.
“Don’t.” No matter how hard she tried she couldn’t move, couldn’t escape.
Zac ground his crotch against Adam’s hand, pushing him in, the shock of it, the invasion, stole her breath.
All of a sudden Adam was gone, yanked away, sent down to the floor, flat on his back. And Neve could not believe her eyes. “Rory?”
In a haze of rage he went after Zac, two quick punches, bam bam, right to the face.
Zac cupped his nose and bent over. “Shit, you crazy motherfucker. What’d you do that for?”
Adam started to get up.
Rory stomped his boot on Adam’s throat, pressing down hard. “You like to breathe, asshole?”
Adam went still, watching Rory warily. Then he gave one small nod.
“You lay perfectly still and I’ll let you get some air. You or your buddy,” he pointed at Zac, “move one muscle and I’ll jam my foot down so hard your windpipe will swell shut.” Then he looked at Neve. “You okay?”
Zac answered. “Of course she’s okay,” he said through his cupped palms. “She invited us in, likes to play. We were just giving her what she wanted.”
Eyes wide and innocent, Adam nodded.
Rory glanced at Neve for confirmation, uncertainty in his eyes, not sure if he should believe them, actually considering that she might be entertaining these miscreants within hours of him leaving, that she was about to engage in a threesome even though she’d told him she didn’t do that.
It only took seconds for Rory’s uncertainty to turn to anger. “That true? Did you invite these guys in?” he asked, his voice hard, his stance rigid, his chest bulked out, challenging her, his eyes scrutinizing her face as if trying to identify any sign she might try to lie.
And there it was, the look of distrust and disdain she’d hoped to never have to see on Rory’s face, a slap of reality she’d expected, tried to avoid by making him leave. And it felt just as shitty as she’d thought it would. Mere hours after Rory had told her, I think you’re more hung up on your past than I am, he’d been given the opportunity to prove those words, to show that he trusted her and believed she’d changed. Yet he’d chosen to doubt her instead, to consider the worst.
And didn’t that totally suck! Neve crossed her arms over her chest, feeling dead inside, and looked Rory straight in the eyes, challenging him right back. “Well, I guess you’re going to believe what you want to believe.”
Zac started to move, wiping the blood from his nose with the back of his hand, eyeing Rory. “What do you say we forget about this little…misunderstanding.” He motioned between himself and Adam. “You give us a couple of hours to do what we came here to do, then you can have a turn.”
Like he spoke for her, like when she was done servicing them, she’d service the new guy, and whoever showed up after that. Like some whore.
Apparently Rory had released enough pressure from Adam’s throat to allow speech. “Or he could have her mouth,” he offered. Good old Adam could always be counted on to make a situation worse. “She does some real good shit with that mouth.”
No sooner were the words out than Nate barreled in through the door, looking ready to commit murder, his partner Ziger right behind him.
“I want them both arrested,” Neve yelled, pointing between Adam and Zac.
“Crazy bitch invited us in, then this lunatic attacked us,” Zac said, sounding nasal, blood dripping down his chin.
“I did not invite you in.” Neve bent to pick up her sweatshirt, feeling exposed, needing to cover up. Nate grabbed her hand, held it out. That was when she noticed Adam’s dark red handprint on her forearm.
“Let me see the other one,” he demanded.
She lifted it slowly, displaying a matching handprint on her pale skin.
“Who did that?” Nate asked, his voice lethal, his eyes enraged.
“Adam.”
“Whoa,” Adam said from his position on the ground. “We were just fooling around.”
“No, we weren’t.” Neve clutched her clothing to her chest. “They tried to force me….” She swallowed down a hysterical sob at the thought of what they’d intended to do, what could have happened.
“We did not try to force her,” Adam protested.
“That’s right,” Zac added. “We were just getting her ready.”
“I told you no!” Neve yelled.
“That’s what she does,” Adam insisted. “It’s a game we play. She says no, and then I have to convince her to say yes.”
“Well, tonight when I said no I meant no.” Even to her own ears that sounded ridiculous. So she added, “I’m not that girl anymore.”
Adam stared up at her. “Honey, you’ll always be that girl.”
And that right there summed up the reason Neve had to leave. Not wanting to see Rory’s or Nate’s reaction to Adam’s statement, Neve looked down at her feet, remembering she needed to get a pedicure before the audition.
Then she heard sounds of a struggle. Adam let out a loud “Oomph,” followed by a “Hey, that’s police brutality.”
Neve shifted just enough to see him on his stomach now, with Rory holding his hands behind his back while Ziger cuffed him, none too gently. Good! Then she found Nate. “I didn’t invite them in,” she said quietly. “I only opened the door to get Adam to quiet down. So he wouldn’t disturb my neighbors.” Please believe me.
“I know.” Nate hugged her. “I know.”
Tears filled her eyes. Thank God for Nate. She went up on her toes and whispered into his ear. “Make sure you check them for drugs.”
With Adam under control, Rory stood. “Neve. I’m sorry.”
The words I’m sorry didn’t make up for the disdain she’d seen in his eyes, a vision likely burned into her memory. The words I’m sorry didn’t alleviate the hurt of knowing, after all they’d been through together, he didn’t believe she’d changed, didn’t trust her. She’d been right to make him leave.
“Get out” was all she had the energy to say.
Apparently thinking everyone in the room was occupied, Zac thought it a good time to make a run for the door. But Nate tackled him to the ground with a satisfying thud, using way more force than necessary.
Rory stood there, not getting out. Fine. Then she’d leave. Neve turned toward her bedroom and headed in that direction.
Hands clamped onto her shoulders from behind. “Stop,” Rory said.
Neve wanted to fight, to scream and yell and hurt him as much as he’d hurt her. But she had no more fight left in her. Completely tapped out, she closed her eyes and dropped her head, letting out a breath. “We’re over, Rory. Please leave.”
“But—”
The hands on her shoulders left.
Nate said, “She asked you to leave. And I suggest you do that now, before you find yourself in cuffs like those other two.”
Rory tried to talk around him. “I’m sorry. When they said you invited them in I…”
Neve turned around. “You what?”
He rubbed his hand at the back of his neck. “I…” The guilt and shame in his eyes didn’t make her feel any better.
She’d fallen for him, cared about him, too much, a man she could never have. A man she could no longer stand to look at. “Go home,” she told Rory, standing tall, unwilling to let him see her pain. “Forget about me, because as of this moment, in my mind, you’re as good as dead.”
With that she continued on to her bedroom, closing and locking the door, clutching at her aching chest, fighting back tears. Rory didn’t deserve them.
Someone knocked lightly. “I’m going to need a statement,” Nate said quietly.
Neve could not deal with one more thing tonight. “Can’t I write it down for you and leave it in your mailbox?”
“How about I come back to check on you when I’m all done? Give it to me then.”
“I’ll probably be sleeping,” she lied, knowing she wouldn’t be there. “Nate,” she said, pressing her cheek to the door.
“Yeah?”
“Take Rory with you. Don’t arrest him or anything, just get him out of here.”
“You sure?”
“Yes.”
“Okay then.”
“And Nate?”
“I’ve got to get out there and help Ziger.”
“I love you.” Something she didn’t tell him often enough.
After a moment’s hesitation he responded, “I love you too.”
Neve stayed in her room until everyone had left, peering out her bedroom window to make sure. Nate drove the cruiser with Zac and Adam in the back. Ziger drove Rory’s rental with Rory in the front passenger seat. And as soon as the lights from both vehicles disappeared from view, Neve grabbed the rest of her stuff, ran to her car, and left. Knowing Rory might come looking for her at her parents’ house, she headed to Luca’s apartment, hoping he’d left his extra key hidden in the usual spot.
Chapter 18
Five days.
Neve turned her car into the driveway, completely exhausted, mentally and physically drained. Twenty-five years to build a life for herself, an imperfect one, yes, but far from horrible. And all it took was five days for that life to completely fall apart.
After parking she walked along the sidewalk, feeling herself unraveling with each step. When she reached the door she knocked. If no one answered she had no idea what to do or where she’d go from here.
Thank goodness someone did answer. And at the sight of Brooke, Neve threw herself into her best friend’s arms and cried. The gasping-for-breath, too-upset-to-talk, ugly type of crying.
All Brooke did was hug her tight and say, “I was hoping you’d come.”
Neve didn’t know how long she cried. Somehow they wound up on the couch with a box of tissues. Brooke didn’t bombard her with questions. She simply sat there, hugging Neve close, as usual knowing exactly what she needed.
When she finally felt ready to talk, her words came out in between hiccupping breaths. “We had…to…cancel…the audition.”
“Oh, Neve,” Brooke said. “What happened?”
“I tried.” New tears started to flow. “So hard.”
“I know you did.” She rubbed Neve’s back.
“I’m not where I need to be physically.” Or mentally. And neither was Luca. Neve blotted her eyes. “Luca’s heart wasn’t in it.” He missed Frankie and the life they’d created in San Francisco. “Our one chance came at the wrong time.”
“Give yourself a few more weeks to recover completely. Maybe—”
“No.” Neve shook her head. “This was my once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.” Lost. She sniffled and wiped her nose. “Luca’s on his way back to San Francisco. We’re done.”
“I’m so sorry.”
Neve started to cry all over again. “Me too.” She sniffled, grabbing another tissue. “It’s kind of ironic, don’t you think?” She looked up at Brooke, so beautiful, sweet, and kind. “When I’m buzzing along, self-centered, slutty, and bitchy, my life is good. I try to change, to become a better person. I make a selfless gesture to save someone else’s life and it winds up ruining mine.” She tried to laugh at the irony, but it came out more of a garbled choking sound.
“Your life isn’t ruined,” Brooke said.
Beg to differ. “I lost my one chance to perform with Cirque du Soleil, my dream job. My dance partner is gone. And even if I wanted to go home, which I don’t, I can’t.”
“Nate mentioned the two men arrested at your condo were both found to be in possession of cocaine.”
Both arrested, both repeat offenders, both facing jail time, and Neve didn’t want to be anywhere within retaliation distance. Even staying in town and out of sight while she’d been practicing had made her nervous. “I’m just like my birth-mother.” Neve had told Brooke all about what she’d learned at Thanksgiving. How her birth-mother had gotten into a dangerous situation and had to leave town.
“She managed to turn her life around,” Brooke said brightly. “And she didn’t have half the things going for her that you do. Maybe now you’ll finally put your college degree to work. Kids love you.”
“I don’t have the energy to turn my life around right now.” Neve yawned, so tired.
“Come.” Brooke stood. “You can take a nap in my bed.”
Neve followed her. “Don’t you have a guest room?”
“It’s, uh, a mess right now. Here.” She pulled down the covers on her queen bed. “This is my side.” Neve toed off her sneakers. “Climb right in and go to sleep.”
“Thank you.” Brooke covered her up. “I didn’t know where else to go.”
“You’re always welcome here.” Brooke kissed her forehead. But instead of leaving, she stood there, looking like she wanted to say something.
“What is it?”
Brooke hesitated. “Ummm, nothing.” She shook her head. “We can talk more when you wake up.”
The next time Neve opened her eyes the room was dark and she could hear two men arguing. Worried for Brooke, she rolled out of bed, walked toward the light filtering in through the space under the door, and exited the room. Squinting while her eyes adjusted, she walked down the hallway. Suddenly all conversation stopped.
In the kitchen stood Brooke and Shane. And Rory.
Neve wanted to scream out to God, What the hell else do you want to throw at me? A damn lightning bolt? Brin
g it on. Actually, at that moment, she’d have welcomed it.
“Neve,” Rory said, walking toward her. “What happened?”
She ignored him, talking to Brooke instead, disappointed in her friend. “I’m sorry. I thought you said ‘mess’ in the guest room, not ‘guest’ in the guest room.” She looked directly at her. “Would have been nice if you’d mentioned Rory was here.”
“I knew if I did you’d leave. And you were so upset.” Brooke walked closer, uncertainly, positioning herself between Neve and Rory. “I’m sorry. That’s what we were just talking about. Shane’s going to take Rory over to stay at his mom’s house so you can stay here.”
“No, he’s not,” Rory said. “Not until after I talk to Neve.”
Not going to happen. She didn’t have the energy, couldn’t handle it. So she turned herself right back around and returned to the bedroom, ignoring Rory’s pleading and Brooke’s apologizing, thankful the door had a lock. Not caring who knocked or what any of them had to say, she put both pillows over her ears, closed her eyes, and ignored the outside world completely.
Unable to sleep, she lay there, thinking, planning, and waiting for the light in the hallway to turn off. An hour later, at two thirty in the morning, Neve unlocked the door, opened it slowly, and peered out into the hallway—finding, to her relief, deserted quiet. Going back to the bed, she straightened the covers and grabbed her shoes. Then, using the walls for guidance, she crept along the hallway, thankful for a nightlight glowing in the kitchen, thankful to see her purse waiting for her on the counter.
“It’s going to break her heart if you leave like this,” a deep voice said from the darkness in the family room. Shane’s voice.
“Tell her I’m not mad.” She wasn’t. Not at Brooke. She sat down on a chair to put on her sneakers.
Shane limped into the light. “Why don’t you tell her yourself? In the morning.”
She looked at the big man, his one eye observant, the patch covering where his other eye used to be making him look pirate tough. “You plan to keep me from leaving?”
He pulled out the chair across from her, leaving the path to the door clear, and sat down. “Mic’s a good guy.”
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