by Pam Grier
I sip my tea and watch the sky turning into pastel streaks, warming up the heavens. The sun is up, and God only knows what’s in store. As I head to the bedroom to get dressed and meet the day, I am reminded that when I was small, I dreamed of a world without discrimination, a world where people helped each other, just because we were all human beings. A world where the doors were all left open.
For our children today, those doors are finally open most of the way, and I say:
Run through them! The world is waiting!
Acknowledgments
With profound gratitude to Grand Central Publishing, publisher Jamie Raab, and executive editor Karen R. Thomas for their guidance, wisdom, and humor in helping me to discover what was lost and now found and nurtured. Thanks to Matthew Rolston for his brilliant photography.
Heartfelt thanks to Dad and the Family of Angels.
Matt Blank, Robert Greenblatt, Jerry Offsay, everyone at Showtime Networks.
Andrea Cagan, who suffered hair loss working with me. She taught me volumes. I thank her for the shared discipline of an exciting journey.
Quentin Tarantino, Harvey and Bob Weinstein, Lawrence Bender, Kelly Bush, Alfred Sapse, Jim Stein, Steve LaMana, Scott Harris, Scott Miller.
Aunt Mignonne, Beth Klein, Pearlina Igbokwe.
Roger Corman, Oprah Winfrey, Ilene Chaiken, Rose Lam.
The L Word family, Jennifer Beals.
All of my teachers, shamans, talismen, agents, stuntpeople, especially Bob Minor and Jadie David, and my casting directors.
Jeff Corey, Tamar and Josh Hoffs, Carl Gottlieb, and Seth Riggs.
Gloria Steinem, Bethanne Hardison, Annie Leibovitz, Greg Gorman.
Andrew Davis, John and Sandy Carpenter, Michael Mann, Steven Seagal.
Wilford Brimley, Paula Gentry, Lani Groves, Bobby Womack, Sylvester Stewart, Warrington Hudlin.
Eve Ensler, Valerie Scott, the Ryan Family, Haywood Hobbs.
Denver Center for the Performing Arts, Crossroads Theatre, Terrence McNally, Sam Shepard, Julie Hubert, Will Smith, David Alan Grier, Jay Leno, Eddie Murphy, Spike Lee, Martin Lawrence, Adrianna Trigianni, Bonnie Seligson, Diane Benedict, Mike Davis, Alan Lande, Debra Martin Chase, Joel Lachman, Whoopi Goldberg, Andrew J. Epstein.
Grand Master Doo Wai, Pam Derderian, Tim Bennet, Tim Mahoney, and Abana Jacobs, Subaru USA, Chris Latimer, Cynthia Summers, Joanne Fowler, Paul Edwards, Faye Katz, Howard Sherman, Robin McMillan, Rich Licatta, Danielle Gelbert.
The Linc’s family, Tim and Daphne Reid, Susan Fales-Hill, Charles Randolph-Wright.
Thanks to Herman, Wanda, Debby, and Tom and family. Tim Burton, Dorothea Petrie, David Moss, Maggie Charnas, Sharon and Greg Dreyden, Diana Gradiska, Bob and Angela Egerton, Phillip and Brenda Kruse, Irv Schecter, Glenn Leira, Harry Gold, Marlee Matlin, Darryl Marshak, Gail Poindexter, Glenn Riggberg, Larry Kinnar, Erin Daniels, Daniella Sea.
Mia Kirshner, Laurel Holloman, Leisha Hailey, Cybill Shepherd, Snoop Dogg and family, Ernie and Ashley Smatt, Kate Moening, Rose Rollins, Angela Robinson, Amy and Gloria Hempel, Bonnie and Jamie Schaefer, Elizabeth and Amy Ziff, Betty, Minaz, Hennessey USA, Rose Troche, Kirk Montgomery, Tricia Brock, Scott Peacock.
The Wayans brothers, Dr. Joel Gendleman, Geoff and Valerie Young, Bill Pickett, Rodeo, Inc.
Lu Vason and family, TZR, and Tony.
Producers and casting directors who hired me for many years.
My physicians, who have managed to save my life many times over.
In memory of David Baumgarten, Minnie Riperton, Odessa Oma, Altovise Davis, Aunt Mignonne, and Fritz Baskett
Me at three months.
Mom and Dad in 1962 at her sister Aunt Mennon’s house.
Baby brother, Rodney, a few months old; Aunt Mignonne; and me, barely two, in Denver.
Me, Dad, and Rod, ready to go for a ride.
Me, Mom, and Rod, at church on Easter.
Me in junior high—seventh grade.
Me in the Miss KHOW Beauty Contest. I was so nervous during the contest that I put my swimsuit on backward!
My senior high school photo. I’m wearing the sweater I shared with Krista.
The morning after the Miss Colorado Universe Beauty Pageant, where I won first runner-up.
My Levi’s billboard, from the streets of Manhattan.
A fight scene from The Big Doll House.
My friend Jack Silverman took this picture of a marquee in Chicago—a surprise to me.
Kareem and me. It was the eighties. After all we lived through, being apart, he never judged me in my decisions not to convert or to do nude scenes in films. We became true friends—not lovers, but friends to share our lives and laugh.
Kareem had been on a journey to Egypt, the land of pharaohs and kings. I was working on a Roger Corman film in the Philippines and missed him dearly.
©1975, Ms. magazine
Gloria Steinem courageously put me on the cover of Ms. magazine. Acclaimed author Jamaica Kincaid wrote the story. I was so honored to have them interested in my past and how it would help me survive my future. Women have so much to share in strength. Numbers win in unity.
Jet magazine photo of Freddie Prinze and me attending the NAACP Awards in Los Angeles.
Cards from John Lennon that came with bouquets of flowers and apologies for the Troubadour fracas.
Paul Newman and me on the set of Fort Apache, The Bronx.
Me and dear friend Wilford Brimley in Los Angeles, California (not the set of Tough Enough).
Press picture of a wedding scene with Richard in Greased Lightning (Warner Bros.).
Richard at his house in Northridge, California, preparing to go for a bike ride with me. The infamous yellow Jaguar is in the foreground.
My sister, Gina, Richard, and me at Mom’s house in Denver.
Philip Michael Thomas and I worked on Miami Vice together. He had been in Denver on business, and Mom had to see him in the flesh. True to his word, he dropped by to pay Mom, my stepfather, Edward, and my nephew, Gael, a visit, and he stayed for dinner. Mom can cook, and he could not resist her cooking. He is one of the most sincere friends in this world.
Me and Don Johnson on the set of Miami Vice, circa 1984.
Me and Eddie Murphy on the set of Linc’s at Paramount Studios in Los Angeles, California.
Snoop Dogg and me on the set of Bones.
My back for my character, the Captain, in the pilot of Earthlings, later titled The L Word. Three hours of tattoo work all for art.
Contents
Front Cover Image
Welcome
Dedication
ACT ONE: The Early Years 1949–1970
CHAPTER 1 Stunt Work
CHAPTER 2 Marky and Me
CHAPTER 3 Keeping Secrets
CHAPTER 4 Big Horse
CHAPTER 5 A New Perspective
CHAPTER 6 Home Strife
CHAPTER 7 Going Gospel
CHAPTER 8 Beauty and the Beast
CHAPTER 9 Westward Bound
ACT TWO: ’Fros and Freaks 1970–1989
CHAPTER 10 Going Hollywood
CHAPTER 11 A Tall Gentleman
CHAPTER 12 My Boyfriend and His God
CHAPTER 13 Me, an Actress?
CHAPTER 14 The Big Doll House
CHAPTER 15 The Paisley Head Scarf
CHAPTER 16 Lightning, Thunder, and Blood
CHAPTER 17 Scheherazade
CHAPTER 18 Donatello
CHAPTER 19 Freddie and Me
CHAPTER 20 Fame and Relationships
CHAPTER 21 John and Harry
CHAPTER 22 An Unlikely Couple
CHAPTER 23 Three Strikes and I’m Outta There!
CHAPTER 24 Loss
CHAPTER 25 The Actor Prepares
CHAPTER 26 Becoming Charlotte
CHAPTER 27 Mingling with the Stars
CHAPTER 28 Haunting
ACT THREE: Finding the Balance 1990–The Present
CHAPTER 29 The C Word
CHAPTER 30 Separating the Men from the Boy
s
CHAPTER 31 On the Move Again
CHAPTER 32 Ghosts of Boyfriends Past
CHAPTER 33 Meeting Jackie Brown
CHAPTER 34 Working with Quentin
CHAPTER 35 Caleb
CHAPTER 36 New Beginnings
CHAPTER 37 The L Word
CHAPTER 38 How I Became a Scandal
CHAPTER 39 You Say Good-bye, I Say Hello
Epilogue
Acknowledgments
Photo Insert
A Standing Ovation for FOXY
Copyright
A Standing Ovation for FOXY
“Surprise, surprise, surprise—she’s not just the hot smoking chick who could deliver a karate chop… Pam Grier, the ’70s film beauty, reveals her true self in a memoir of her struggles, her loves, and the pain in her past… the life of a woman struggling to make it on her own and doing so with grace and class.”
—Philadelphia Inquirer
“A survivor’s saga… a memoir about her four decades of acting, but it’s also about overcoming abuse and cancer.”
—Sunday Denver Post
“This engaging memoir reveals her odds-defying journey from six-year-old rape victim with a post-traumatic stutter to iconic action hero. Also detailed are her triumph over cancer and her successful comeback in 1997’s Jackie Brown, written for her by Quentin Tarantino.”
—People
“Secrets of a sex symbol… our first big-screen female action hero… she details all in her rousing first book.”
—Essence
“Blasts into the memoir genre… Grier, a cancer survivor, frankly discusses ‘falls and crawls’… surprisingly frank… reads as if one is dishing over coffee with a girlfriend.”
—examiner.com
“I could not put this book down… whatever you think you want to know about Miss Pam Grier, it is right here in this book, her words, her truths… you all make sure you go out and pick up this book.”
—Mo’Nique, The Mo’Nique Show
“A cultural icon… [she] exposes all in her memoir.”
—Philadelphia Daily News
“Grier doesn’t skimp on the particulars of her romances… but FOXY is more interesting for [another] reason: to find out how an ordinary person ended up living an extraordinary life… FOXY shows that when a character described Foxy Brown as ‘a whole lot of woman,’ he didn’t know the half of the story behind the woman who portrayed her.”
—Boulder Daily Camera
“Guaranteed to surprise… Strongly recommended.”
—Library Journal
“Grier has lived a remarkable life, and she tells her story clearly and movingly.”
—Asbury Park Press
“Wonderful stories… I enjoyed the read.”
—Tavis Smiley, TAVIS SMILEY
“The never-say-die actress/singer/icon opens up and lets the world into her life to witness her triumphs, failures, challenges, and loves, which include the likes of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Freddie Prinze Sr., and Richard Pryor… This saga of one of the world’s most beautiful women—and her overcoming every hurdle that gets in her way—will bring tears and cheers as she survives everything, even a bout with cancer.”
—PRLog.org
“Iconic… the original strong black female star… Grier stands assured that her as-told-to autobiography will be welcomed by film-studies collections high and low.”
—Booklist
“Brutally honest.”
—Kalamazoo Gazette
“Grier tells all… The thoughtful actress always comes out swinging… [she] will go down as one of the toughest, meanest, foxiest badasses ever to grace the screen… explores her unlikely rise from a rural Colorado girl to a feminist to a cancer survivor who has enjoyed a comeback on and off the screen.”
—Cleveland Plain Dealer
“Covers her influential career and makes public, for the first time, the details of the sexual abuse and racial prejudice she suffered as a child.”
—AARP magazine
“A terrific memoir… shares some horrific experiences… details her romantic experiences… she is a survivor.”
—Southern California Public Radio
“Honest… I absolutely enjoyed it.”
—ApooBooks.com
“Chronicles the good, bad, and steamy highlights in her life and career.”
—eventful.com
“The previously private Grier finally lets loose… and you see how truly fierce she is… She is a trooper, a survivor, and by the end of the book, just like in those old movie posters, there she still stands, in the midst of chaos, calm, in control, and fabulous—still the baddest chick in town.”
—thegrio.com
“A lively, engaging read… expose[s] the more sensitive, accomplished woman many have watched but only a few really know.”
—The Root
“A candid portrayal of life growing up in a different time period and the developments that have made her the strong woman she is today.”
—windycitymediagroup.com
“Details her personal life as an actress involved with some of the most famous men of the era.”
—blackamericaweb.com
“An intimate look inside her childhood, her upbringing, and the road she traveled to move up within the entertainment industry.”
—WomanTribune.com
“An illuminating and poignant memoir.”
—zimbio.com
“An alternately shocking, wistful, and steely portrait of her own mythology that is compulsively readable.”
—popmatters.com
Copyright
I have modified the identities and certain details about some of the individuals described in this book.
Copyright © 2010 by Pam Grier
All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
Grand Central Publishing
Hachette Book Group
237 Park Avenue, New York, NY 10017
Visit our website at www.HachetteBookGroup.com.
www.twitter.com/grandcentralpub.
Second eBook Edition: July 2011
Grand Central Publishing is a division of Hachette Book Group, Inc.
The Grand Central Publishing name and logo is a trademark of Hachette Book Group, Inc.
The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content) that are not owned by the publisher.
ISBN: 978-0-446-56470-0