Ethan caught her glance from the top of the driveway by the canteen. He set a can beside Sandy and jogged down the hill. Face strained with worry, he stopped in front or her. “I know you’re upset with me, and you have every right to be. Someone broke into the boatshed on my watch. I take full responsibility for that. If you want me to leave, I understand.”
She lifted her head, far past ready for things to change. “I don’t want you to leave, Ethan. I want you to take me out.”
Working the rest of the day hadn’t gotten rid of the unease chafing against Ethan’s insides. He tossed a towel into his Jeep’s back seat. “This is a bad idea.”
“Bridge jumping?” Ti swung her camera over the side and leaped into the back. Cans rattled in the floorboard. “It’s an awesome idea.”
“Yeah, if we were teenagers, maybe.” He closed his door but couldn’t shake the look on Cass’s face when she’d asked him to take her. Something wasn’t right. He’d thought for sure after talking her into putting it off most of the day, she’d have changed her mind by now.
“Oh, lighten up. She was always too chicken to do it when we were campers. Let her be fearless for once. You’re the one urging her to let her hair down, right?”
Ti’s comment caught him dead in the gut. Was that what this was about?
His cell buzzed in the cup holder. After waiting for Mom’s call all day, he scrambled to grab it. His shoulders sank at the sight of Jenni’s number instead. What made him think his mother would actually get back to him?
He ignored the call as Cass jogged over in a pair of board shorts and a T-shirt over a bathing suit.
Ti whistled. “Ready for some fun, girlfriend?”
“You have no idea.” Cass jumped in and pulled her sunglasses off her head.
Ti drummed her hands on the top of Ethan’s seat. “Let’s rock and roll.”
Muscles taut, he let off the clutch. This morning’s confrontation at the boatshed added to the tension left over from yesterday. Now this. Why wouldn’t the girl just talk to him?
Not that he had room to say anything. Explaining his reaction to those tickets meant opening the part of his past he wasn’t ready to share yet. But surely, she knew his leaving last night had nothing to do with a lack of attraction. Didn’t she?
Once on the road, Cass stood up and flung her arms in the air, fiery hair blowing behind her. Ti’s laugh followed several camera flashes and blended into Cass’s squeals.
He snagged the bottom of her shirt. “What are you doing?”
“Letting loose.” She gripped the top of the Jeep with one hand but didn’t take her eyes off the sunset on the skyline. “Freedom, space—just you and the wind, remember?”
He never expected to eat those words. Now, he wanted to throw them up.
She sat and slid her glasses along her nose to meet his eyes. “A little adventure’s good for you.” She had his voice down perfectly.
Was she gonna dish out any other reminders of all the stupid things he’d said to her this week? Sure, he wanted her to enjoy herself. Wanted her to laugh, experience life outside of work. But not like this. Not if she was doing it because she thought he wanted her to.
He parked in the turnoff twenty feet away from the rusty steel bridge. Ti slipped out the back and shot a few pictures. Stomach still churning, he grabbed Cass’s hand before she opened the door. “Can we talk first?”
“I’m tired of talking, Ethan.” She clambered out. “I’m ready to live.”
Ti tossed an arm around her and snapped a picture of the two of them together before running to the bridge.
Ethan jogged after them, not ready to give up.
They ducked under the first railing. Ti shot another picture and lowered the camera. “It’d be perfect if Mr. Pouty Face behind you weren’t ruining it. Relax, Ethan. It’s not that far of a drop.”
The drop wasn’t the problem. “I’m sorry. I just don’t think this is a good idea.”
Head to the side, Cass glowered at him. “You’re telling me you’ve never made this jump before?”
His jaw flexed, and she flashed a that’s-what-I-thought smirk.
“Yeah, in August, after the water’s had a chance to warm up. At least go down and feel it first.” If the wind hitting them in the face right now didn’t change her mind, dipping her toes in that frigid water would.
“I’m a big girl, Ethan.” She finagled her T-shirt over her head and handed it to him, followed by her shorts. “If you guys can do it, I can do it.”
He darted his gaze to the arch above them. This wasn’t the time to react to his attraction. A long exhale lowered his eyes no farther than hers. “It’s not a competition.”
A pained smile looked back at him. “Wrong. It’s always a competition.” She climbed under the outer rail and held on to the bar behind her.
“Cass, please.” Gripping the cool steel, he set his free hand on her arm. “You don’t have anything to prove.”
Her hazel eyes carried waves of sadness. “Wrong again.” She faced the wide creek carved through the mountains. Wind rushed through her hair. And with a deep inhale, she let go.
The thrill of release tingled through her. For the first time, nothing held her back. Nothing grounded her. No restraint, no responsibility. Just air. Freedom.
Until she hit the water.
Knives. Thousands of ice-cold knives stabbed her body from every direction, stealing her breath, her movement. She gasped for air.
“Cassidy!” A garbled voice rang from somewhere above her.
She strained to push the weights surrounding her. Limbs numb, she couldn’t swim against the current. Couldn’t call for help.
Shivers racked her lungs. So. Cold. She closed her eyes. Time slowed as panic gradually surrendered to the drowsiness taking control of her pulse.
Downstream, a blurry silhouette crested the bank. Ethan. What little fight she had left in her thrust her arms out, but the pull of the water tunneled her backward over a cluster of shallow rapids. Adrenaline recharged her muscles and shot her up from the surface for air.
“Eth—” Her back smacked into a bolder behind her. With the wind knocked out of her, darkness compressed until everything went black.
Something firm pressed into her chest. Once, twice. A burning sensation trekked up her throat. She turned and coughed. Water spilled over her cheek as Ethan blinked into focus.
Soaking wet, his whole body nearly crumbled above her with an exhale of relief. He drew her into the crook of his arm, heart racing. Instead of saying all the things he had every right to, he wrenched off his wet shirt, wrapped a towel around her, and kept her close.
He brought her numb fingers to his mouth and blew warm breath over them, but she couldn’t stop her teeth from chattering. “I . . . c-can’t even . . . h-have f-fun . . . when I t-try.”
He smiled against her hair. “Maybe you shouldn’t try to cram it all into one day.”
It hurt to laugh. Almost as much as it hurt to admit what a stupid idea this was. Had she really thought he’d see her differently after this? That she’d see herself differently?
“Cass!” Ti flew down the bank. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have—”
“I s-seem to r-remember . . . jumping . . . on . . . m-my own.”
Ethan took Ti’s towel, layered it on top of the other, and scooped Cass up from the ground.
In the Jeep, he angled all vents toward her and blasted the heat. Yet as soothing as it felt, the warmth didn’t touch the comfort that being carried in his arms had given her.
The main building fluttered into view, the ride home a blur.
He jogged around the front bumper to her side, like he was getting ready to carry her to her room.
“I can walk, Ethan. I’m fine, really.” Aside from being mortified, anyway. She planted her feet on the ground and steadied a hand against the Jeep’s door panel. “Nothing a hot shower can’t cure.”
His gaze flitted to Ti, and she was glued to her hip before Cas
s could argue.
Once inside, Ti started the shower and set her robe out. Cass peeled the wet bathing suit off her skin. Rash marks ran down her arms and legs where the moss-covered rocks had scraped against her. They’d sting in the shower, but it’d be worth it to feel her toes again.
As soon as Ti closed the bedroom door, Cass shut herself in the steam-filled bathroom. Hot water jetted onto her back, unlocking her muscles one at a time.
If she stayed in here long enough, maybe it’d wash away all traces of what had just happened. Better yet, traces of the entire week. All she’d done was make one blunder after another. She didn’t even want to imagine what Ethan must think of her now.
Twenty minutes in the shower hadn’t erased the effects of the day, but there was always the chance her bed would work its magic. She pulled on her bathrobe, flopped onto the mattress, and covered her face with a pillow.
A scream jolted Cass straight up in bed and sent her gaze shooting across the dark room toward her clock. Midnight. That cold water must’ve taken more out of her than she’d thought.
She slid her legs off the side of the bed and waited to regain her equilibrium. Sandy’s bark joined some other commotion outside. What in the world?
She tightened the belt on her robe and hurried down the hall. “Ti? What’s going on?”
A draft blew in from the wide-open front door. Adrenaline took over exhaustion and propelled her outside. “Ti?”
Barely halfway across the deck, she buckled at the knees. Massive flames roared from the canteen. Ti held Sandy on the edge of the driveway while Ethan combated the fire with a hose. Waves of heat and smoke barreled over her, but all she could do was stare.
No. This isn’t happening. Breath came hard and sharp, launching her down the stairs.
“Cass, don’t.” Ti rose but couldn’t grab her. “Ethan!”
He dropped the hose and caught Cass around the waist.
“Let me go. We have to stop it.”
His hold tightened. “The truck’s on its way. There’s nothing we can do.”
“No.” She wrestled to break free, thrashing and shrieking.
The roof collapsed. A gust of heat and debris flooded toward them. Ethan turned her in his arms and cradled her head to his chest. Too weak to fight him, she held on.
Sirens struck the air while red lights led a fire truck up the driveway. Ethan called Ti over. “Get her inside. Stay with her.” He rested a hand on her arm. “Please.”
Ti shouldered most of Cass’s weight while guiding her up the deck. In the bedroom, Ti curled beside her on the mattress. “It’s gonna be okay.”
Would it?
“I should be out there.”
“Shh.” Ti held her tight until the fight drained from her.
The blare from the sirens stopped, but the turmoil outside kept pulsing. The truck’s lights flashed against the shadows in the room. Clutching her pillow, Cass squeezed her eyes shut.
Ti rubbed her arm and sang the way they did as kids when they wanted to pretend nothing bad could reach them. “When the lights turn dark and the shadows deep, close your eyes and drift to sleep. To the place of dreams that sweep us away, together we run. Best friends, always.”
Cass clasped Ti’s hand, grateful not to be alone. Fears coiled around questions of who was behind this and what lengths they’d go. Would she and Ti be in danger next? Ethan’s protection could only stretch so far, and she had no one else to turn to for help.
Their childhood song replayed in her mind. As scared as she was, she couldn’t run away from this. Her only choice was to fight.
chapter eighteen
Smolder
Brisk air poured down the mountainside and amplified the dull chill seeping through the grass into Cass’s knees. In front of the canteen, she sat back and faced the wind head-on. It couldn’t sting any worse than the ache that’d kept her awake all night. After shivering out here in her pajamas before the sunrise, her body was already numb, anyway.
She lowered the sledgehammer she’d dragged up from the garage and covered her face with her shirt to block out the charred stench scraping down her nostrils.
Who’d be so cruel to set the canteen on fire? Hadn’t vandalizing the boatshed been enough? And what did they want her to do? Leave? She was trying. But she couldn’t sell a destroyed property.
Surrounded by loss, she rummaged through the soot-covered debris and clutched a piece of blackened plywood. The wood bore into her palms, thoughts of Grandpa cutting deeper. Guilt compounded the anger surging through her. After all he’d sown into the camp, she couldn’t stand by and watch it fall apart. She had to restore it. No matter what it took.
The door on the deck opened. In flannel pajama pants and a dark T-shirt, Ethan stumbled toward the stairs while rubbing his eyes. “Cass? It’s six o’clock.”
“Go back to bed.” With shaky arms, she swung the hammer into what remained of the canteen’s burnt structure. She didn’t have the emotional energy to argue with him right now.
He jogged across the gravel on bare feet and caught her arm. “Cass, stop.”
“I can’t.” There was no time. Whoever’d done this wasn’t going to shut her down. For Grandpa and Mom, she had to pass that inspection.
Ethan pried the hammer from her hands. His warm arms closed around her, and she almost broke right there. “You’re freezing. How long have you been out here?”
Not long enough. She had to keep working.
He rubbed her cold arms. “Please come inside. I know you’re upset, but you need to rest. I promise we’ll work this out . . .”
Headlights came up the driveway and cut him off. Jenni parked her SUV beside the grass and rounded the bumper. A confused gaze flitted between them and the wreckage as she slipped on her jacket.
Ethan tightened his hold around Cass’s back. “What are you doing here?”
Jenni zipped her jacket up to her chin and buried her hands in the pockets. “You said to meet you here.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your text last night.” She pulled out her phone and scrolled through her messages. “You said it’s done and to meet you here at six.”
Cass’s body stiffened. She looked up at Ethan, stomach twisting. It’s done. He was a part of this? He and Jenni, both?
Wide-eyed, he met her gaze, shook his head. “Cass . . .”
She pushed away. “Don’t.”
She turned and folded in half. The memory of her phone call with Nick echoed off the pile of rubble. “Don’t you think it’s weird he’s back, working at that camp for free? If he’s got some kind of ulterior motive, I don’t want to see you get hurt in the process.”
Ulterior motive. Waves of nausea seized her. This wasn’t happening. Not again. Not with Ethan.
Each attack played back in her mind. He was always there, ready to rescue her, earning her trust. And she’d fallen for it, same as she had with Jesse.
She caved to her knees and hugged her arms to her sides. Scenes from this week clashed with scenes from her past until she felt as helpless as that broken teenager in her prom dress, huddled in the back corner of the subway.
Jenni’s SUV trailed down the driveway. Ethan must’ve told her to leave, but Cass couldn’t hear anything except the throb of questions she didn’t want to answer. How could she be this gullible? She’d opened up to him, talked herself out of doubting his motives.
His hand smoothed over her back. “Cass, please . . .”
She flinched away from his touch, hating how much she wanted to draw from the strength and safety of his arms. Hating how, even now, she wanted him to hold her and tell her she was wrong.
Past the point of restraining her tears, she rose and faced him. “Why, Ethan?”
The look of betrayal on her face almost crippled Ethan on the spot. She couldn’t honestly think he was involved in any of this. Especially a fire.
She had no idea how hard it’d been for him to see those flames that close to her la
st night. To see her now with arms covered in scrapes and ash, breaths strained against the smolder.
Flashes of Izzy’s lifeless body struck him like physical blows. Chest tight, he strained to box out the memories and focus on Cass instead.
Dark circles underlined her bloodshot eyes. She was past fatigued, on the verge of collapsing. She wouldn’t be saying any of this if she’d gotten enough sleep to think straight.
He reached for her. “Look at me. I didn’t text Jenni. Someone must’ve gotten my phone.”
“Like someone got your keys to the boathouse?” Tears streamed.
Every inch of him ached to hold her and make it all right. He pulled her close.
“Stop. Just stop.” She shoved him back. “The con’s over, Ethan. Just tell me why you did it. What are you and Jenni getting out of this?”
The jab stung, but seeing her pull away hurt worse. “How can you ask me that?”
“You showed up on my property, ready to save me at every turn.” The delirious look in her eyes backed him away. “The roaches, the mattresses, the raccoons. You were the only one with access to the boatshed. Now this?” She jerked her head toward the canteen. “You knew the fresh lacquer would go up in flames.”
He stopped her by the wrists. “Jeez, Cass, are you even listening to yourself right now?”
“Was this your plan to get me to fall for you? ‘Cause it worked, Ethan. Is that what you want to hear? It worked.”
A flicker of relief shot through him at hearing she had feelings for him, too. Until every past hurt and betrayal tore down her face with such transparent pain, it nearly speared him in two.
He would never add to her heartache. “I don’t know what’s going on here, but I swear you can trust me.” He lifted a hand to her hair, scared to let go.
She closed her eyes at his touch and hung her head so long he almost drew her to him, no matter what fight she might’ve put up.
Tears clung to her lashes when she finally faced him. “You don’t know how much I want to believe that. Please just go.” She walked away, and all he could do was let her.
Write Me Home Page 17