by SJB Gilmour
In front of the loosely assembled hoard of trolls stood a huge troll wearing a general’s uniform. It was bellowing a stirring speech of Trollish patriotism. Its audience responded noisily.
‘That’s Thrag,’ James observed. ‘The old chocker has put on a few kilos. Someone must be taking care of its diet.’
‘It appears it hasn’t given up its idea of being top tog,’ Ronny observed. ‘Is that a general’s insignia on that breastplate?’
‘And there’s Miranda Molotov,’ Angela said, pointing to a woman standing off to one side. ‘It looks like she’s lost another little helper.’
Two burly trolls were carrying a weakly struggling Gretel Grimm out to the assembled hoard. The evil witch appeared to have been beaten to within an inch of her life. The trolls stopped before the crowd and began swinging her body back and forth. Then they hurled the near-dead witch out into the midst of the trolls. The horrible beasts fell on her with relish.
Miranda watched the disgusting scene for a moment, murmured, ‘bon appétit,’ then left.
‘Sequollo!’ Sarah commanded the image to follow.
The image blurred then refocused on a corridor that lead out of the great Troll Hall. Miranda walked down the corridor to a huge iron door. She waved at it contemptuously. The door swung open to reveal a lushly appointed throne room. The floor was littered with elaborate rugs. Rich tapestries hung from the walls and pillars. Torches also hung from brackets on the walls and from some of the pillars. Miranda walked towards the throne.
There, at the steps at the base of the throne, at the ends of two enormous heavy silver chains with links as thick as a man’s arm, were two ragged-looking Brown Coat werewolves.
‘My parents!’ Sarah whined quietly.
The image moved up to display the throne.
James sucked in a quick breath of surprise. ‘And there, my fellow adventurers,’ he muttered, ‘is our old friend and chocolate, Mautallius. We were right about the old scoundrel. Now we know who that army of trolls is really answering to.’
Sitting arrogantly on the throne was an evil-looking man who was hideously old. His ancient skin clung to him like that of a century-old corpse.
‘Did he always look as bad as that?’ Ronny asked Master Isaacs curiously.
James nodded. ‘Always. In fact, he used to look worse. It seems he’s been taking care of himself.’
Benjamin looked at Sarah. ‘Can you go underground? There’s something there that’s got hold of Rufus, remember.’
Sarah concentrated, but the troll had had no idea what was underneath the main hall. ‘I’m sorry, Uncle,’ she replied and let the image vanish. Sarah collapsed back onto the sand and lay there, panting heavily.
Benjamin looked at Robert and Roberta and then at Angela. ‘I think the three of us should go and collect those two Browns,’ he told them as he changed form into the deadly Silver Shroud.
‘Now wait a chocking minute!’ James protested.
As Benjamin created another portal, he turned to James. ‘Stay here with Angela and take care of the kids,’ he instructed.
Angela sighed. ‘I wish he wouldn’t keep doing that,’ she muttered as they disappeared.
For several stunned moments, Sarah, James, Mel, Angela and Ronny looked at one another. ‘Great,’ Mel said finally. ‘Now what?’
James sat down on the edge of the fountain and shrugged. ‘I guess we wait,’ he replied. He pounded one fist on the stone edge of the fountain. ‘Werewolves,’ he muttered and scowled at Sarah who was still panting heavily. ‘You’re all so chocking impulsive.’
‘There goes our water supply,’ Ronny lamented, peering critically at the fountain. The water was murky and smelled horrid.
‘I’ll fix that,’ James told him. He went into his tent for a moment. When he came out, he was carrying a packet of blue seeds.
‘What’re those?’ Ronny asked him.
‘Sicksap seeds,’ James told him, pouring the seeds around the edge of the fountain. ‘Reeds that suck all the sickening goop out of any water they grow in. All they put out is nice, clean water and oxygen.’
He muttered a short incantation and waved at the seeds. Within moments, the fountain was ringed by thick reeds. They looked very much like normal papyrus except that they were a pale purple and reeked of vomit.
‘There!’ James announced. ‘Couple of hours and that water will be crystal clear.’
Chapter Fifteen
The group remained at the oasis through the day and into the night. No-one felt particularly like talking, or even eating.
Ronny sat under a palm tree playing patience with a deck of feisty playing cards that had a habit of snapping at his stubby fingers whenever they had the chance. James and Angela paced back and forth and bickered in frustration. Mel, who usually would have been urging Sarah to muck around, did very little other than lie in her tent.
Sarah soon recovered from her exhaustion and spent several hours pacing around the oasis like a caged animal. For two more days, they had no sign at all from Benjamin, Roberta or Robert.
‘Chocolate this,’ James declared and created his own portal. He quickly armed himself with his secateurs and water bottle and stormed through. No sooner had he marched through the portal when the there was a loud boom and the portal exploded outwards in a burst of green fire. James was blasted back out onto the sand. His water bottle had melted and his clothes had caught fire in several places. His bald head was covered in ash and soot. He rolled around on the sand to put out the flames, all the while coughing smoke.
Angela rushed to her smouldering cousin and helped him to his feet. He was very angry.
‘Chock my chocking chocked head! That chocolate son of a chocking chocolate chocker!’ He blasted several patches of sand into glowing puddles of melted glass.
‘What happened?’ Sarah demanded.
James continued to wave his hands about and produce chocolatus curse-censored profanities. He hurled his secateurs to the ground and kicked the remnants of his water bottle out into the desert.
‘James!’ Angela said sternly.
James stopped trying to swear and then took several deep breaths to get himself under control. ‘The whole place is sealed off,’ he told them. ‘Mautallius has set up some sort of enchantment. We can’t get through.’
‘What about Benjamin and the others?’ Mel asked him urgently.
‘Mautallius has them,’ James told her, massaging his temples with the palms of both hands. ‘I got a quick look at the place before the blast.’ He shook his head painfully. ‘That really hurt.’
‘Well?’ Angela demanded, shaking her cousin by the shoulders. ‘What did you see?’
James shrugged her off, nodding at Sarah. ‘Easy,’ he told the Golden Mane. ‘You don’t need to sink into my mind. I saw Henryk and Jozefa chained to the wall, just as you saw from the troll. McConnell and the Coppernicks are on the other side of that room in some sort of silver cage.’ He resumed pacing and muttering to himself. ‘Mautallius must have been expecting company. There’s no way in. We can’t go in through the top of the mountain and the bottom’s sealed off too. If we even try to get close, we’ll be seen. Even if we manage to get past the scouts Mautallius must have out there, the Guild wards will have us all turned around anyway.’
Ronny gave a delicate cough. ‘Why do we have to go in from the mountainside? We could burrow under from right here, you know,’ he told them mildly.
The others looked at him in surprise.
‘The longer the tunnel, the less likely they’ll notice us coming. I could do it real quiet-like.’ He waggled his short stubby fingers in the air and a shimmering rainbow appeared around the air just in front of his hands.
Angela nodded thoughtfully. ‘It’s possible,’ she mused. She turned to James. ‘Did you get any idea of what sort of enchantment Mautallius used?’
James shrugged. ‘No idea, but it was strong, that’s for sure. He’s obviously expecting more company.’ He paused and looked s
ideways at his cousin. ‘Didn’t you punch through into Conundrum? Maybe you should give it a go.’
Angela shook her head. ‘No way,’ she declared. ‘That nearly killed me. If we’re heading into fight, I’m going to need to be up to it.’
Ronny reached into his satchel and withdrew a large map which he spread out on the sand.
‘From what I recall,’ he said pointing at the base of the mountain, ‘the area under here is riddled with caves and caverns. The place was Kevin’s home for a long time and rock giants need a lot of space. We might be able to find a weak spot.’
Angela beamed at the gnarled little gnome.
‘What we have to do is get inside that throne-room,’ James argued. ‘We won’t be able to do much from under a gazillion tonnes of mountain.’
Ronny grinned proudly at the ash-covered sorcerer. ‘Not you or I,’ he admitted, ‘but Sarah here probably could.’
Sarah gave a startled whine. ‘Me?’
James paused for a moment then smacked his palm on his head. ‘Of course!’ he crowed and began to dance a bizarre jig on the sand.
Sarah stared at the strange little sorcerer and then looked to Angela in confusion.
Her beautiful teacher smiled comfortingly at her. ‘James is right,’ she said. ‘Benjamin should have taken you with him.’
‘I don’t get it?’ Sarah said.
‘Yeah?’ Mel added. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘When the portal exploded,’ Ronny said, grinning. ‘There was green fire, remember?’
‘Don’t have to tell me,’ James said under his breath. ‘I was up to my chocolate in it.’
‘Green fire means demons. If you’re immune to demons then you’re probably more than able to break through that enchantment,’ Ronny explained. ‘That’s why his spell is so strong. He must have enlisted the help of a demon.’
‘But didn’t we send it to a hell?’ Mel protested.
Ronny grinned. ‘That was just a bullious demon. They’re all bluster and wind. I’d say Mautallius has teamed up with something a little more powerful.’
‘A demon!’ Sarah barked. She stood on all four paws defiantly. She was suddenly overtaken by the urge to hunt and kill something.
Angela smiled at her. ‘Easy, Sarah. ‘We’ll get our chance. If Mautallius is in league with a demon, then he’s most likely been possessed by it.’ She nodded at James. ‘There’s not a normal, un-enchanted cell in the universe that could hold Benjamin for long. I’d say the cell you saw that was holding him, Robert and Roberta is enchanted much the same way as whatever kept you out of Troll Mountain.’
‘But I don’t know the first thing about breaking spells!’ Sarah protested grumpily. She was beginning to feel very impatient. She really wanted to hunt.
‘We could teach you, Golden Mane,’ Wolfenvald offered. ‘However, it might be prudent to let your pack-mates help you. Such an exercise can strengthen the bonds that tie a pack together.’
Angela turned to Ronny. ‘How long would it take you to dig us a tunnel under that mountain?’
Ronny looked up at the moon. It was still low in the sky and just over three-quarters full. ‘About four or five days,’ he said, sounding relieved.
‘That should be plenty of time,’ she replied then turned to Sarah. ‘I’ve been around Benjamin for a long time. It’s not my chosen discipline, but I’d say I know almost as much about spellweaving as he does. Sarah, I’ll teach you all you need to know.’
Sarah wagged her tail. ‘Alright,’ she told them, calming down.
James leaped to his feet excitedly. ‘What the chock are we waiting for? C’mon Mason, get digging!’
‘There’s something I think we should do first,’ Ronny said. Then he rushed into his tent. The busy little gnome reappeared perhaps five minutes later with an enormous iron pot. He set the pot above a fire and began hauling huge armfuls of rhubarb out of his satchel.
‘I could do this underground,’ he told them, ‘but it’d probably make the air inside a cave a little unpleasant. Out here is better. If we’re going up against that many trolls,’ he told the others seriously, ‘we’re probably going to need this stuff.’ He then dug out several jars and bottles and began measuring the ingredients into the pot.
One of the jars contained an awful black gunge that smelled like the purple salve the healer Amelia had used on Mel’s parents.
‘What’s that?’ Sarah asked, sniffing it.
‘Durian concentrate,’ Ronny told her. ‘If you reckon it smells now, just wait till I’ve diluted it and warmed it up.’ He emptied the jar into the pot and continued to stir. When he dipped his finger into the brew and licked it, he grimaced. ‘Needs more rhubarb, and I’m out.’ He looked up at James. ‘Do you have any rhubarb in your stores?’
James scratched at his bald scalp for a moment. ‘I’ve got a bit,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘It’s dried though. It doesn’t keep very well unless it’s refrigerated.’
‘Dried is actually better,’ Ronny said clinically. ‘It’s stronger. Re-hydrating it is simple.’
James shrugged. ‘Whatever you want.’ He then dug into his own satchel and pulled out a large brown paper packet with the Sundew Farms logo and label stamped on it.
Dried Chopped Rhubarb
Potions Grade
Ronny took the packet and emptied the entire contents into his simmering pot. He added several more litres of water and stirred for a few more minutes. Then he dipped one stubby, grey finger into the goo and tasted it again.
‘Now, it just needs to come to the boil…’ He put another couple of logs under the fire and kept stirring. As the muck got hotter, it got smellier. Finally, when it was bubbling away merrily, the smell became absolutely vile. While the others backed away from the foul-smelling goo, Mel sniffed at it and peered into the pot.
‘It’s not done yet.’ Ronny then opened two large bottles of tequila. He poured one into the pot, being careful not to let the worm inside the bottle fall into the horrid goop. He popped the worm into his mouth and swallowed, then continued stirring. Then he poured in half of the next bottle. He paused and took a quick swig then wiped his mouth on his sleeve.
‘Want a blast?’ he offered Mel, holding out the bottle.
Before her aunt could protest, Mel took the bottle and took a huge gulp. ‘Eck!’ She coughed and shook her head. She handed the bottle back to Ronny, who took another long swig before emptying the rest of the bottle into the pot and eating the second worm.
‘Chocker,’ James muttered at Ronny. ‘I could do with a drink.’
‘Later,’ Angela told him consolingly. ‘Demeter’s curse won’t last much longer.’ She glanced at her impudently grinning niece. ‘Though maybe we should have asked Her to put it on someone else as well.’
‘There,’ Ronny said proudly. ‘It’s done. Grandma Mason’s Rhubarb Relish!’ He smiled with fondness at the memory of his grandmother. ‘Oh she was a great cook. Bonkers, of course. But all the same, her recipes are famous back home.’ He called out to the others. ‘It’s ready. Just like my grandmother used to make!’ He turned to Angela. ‘I’ll stack Grandma Mason’s Mealtome against any cookbook in the universe!’
James grinned at the gnome. ‘You know,’ he suggested slyly, ‘when this is all over, you and I ought to have a bit of a chat. I’m a dab-hand at growing the best raw materials around. If I were to run into someone who had the recipes and customers, I could expand the pub…’
‘Later boys,’ Angela told the grinning pair crisply.
While everyone gathered their things, Ronny and Mel decanted the awfully smelly goo into dozens of large jars. When it had cooled and they had sealed the jars, they stuffed it all back into Ronny’s satchel.
‘Right!’ Ronny announced. The little gnome re-dressed himself. His travelling clothes were gone. In their place he now wore a sturdy mining coverall, with a brass and leather helmet and a pair of thick goggles. Over his mouth, he wore an elaborate-looking dust mask. On his stumpy feet, h
e wore a pair of rugged steel-capped boots. His gnarled hands were bare and his fingers shimmered with rainbow-coloured light.
Sarah stared at the oddly-dressed little gnome. Ronny nodded at her. Even though his mask hid most of his face, she could tell he was grinning.
‘We gnomes are all miners at heart, Sarah,’ he told her. ‘Gnumphlatia’s electricity depends on nuclear power, after all. It’s a dirty business, mining. That’s why we go to such lengths to appear more presentable when we’re not up to our elbows in ore.’ He stumped over to a bare patch of sand and immediately began burrowing eagerly. Within moments, he was metres into his tunnel.
‘Well,’ he called through his mask, ‘are you coming or not?’
‘Just one thing I’m worried about,’ said Angela. ‘If we leave this tunnel open like that, we’ll be vulnerable.’
‘Leave that to me,’ James told her. He gestured for everyone to follow Ronny into the tunnel. Once they were all inside, he threw a handful of large seeds out onto the sand at the mouth of the tunnel.
‘Horticus!’ he commanded.
The seeds squirmed and dug themselves into the sand. James instantly produced yet another water-spray bottle and squirted the sand a few times. Several large sprouts emerged from the sand.
Sarah watched in amazement as the sprouts grew and grew until they became an impenetrable hedge of a type of tree she recognised immediately.
‘There,’ James said confidently. ‘A eucalyptus horribillus hedge. If anything gets anywhere near that thing, it’ll be chocked!’
For nearly four days and nights, the group painstakingly inched their way down through Ronald’s tunnel. The grey-skinned little gnome burrowed tirelessly through the sand and rock. In that time, Sarah remained in her werewolf shape and barely sat or rested at all. When she did manage to get a few moments sleep, her anguished dreams were filled with the images she had seen of her parents chained to the wall in Mautallius’ den.
Fortunately, Angela managed to distract her with several hours of lessons. Sarah’s teacher patiently explained to Sarah and Mel how enchantments were constructed. At first, Sarah did not understand until she learned to look at a spell not with her eyes, but with her mind.