I look out of the window at the grey clouds; I don’t think the weather is going to be good today. I lean against the table, and twiddle my fingers. “I went for a walk.”
“Hmm, that’s not like you,” he says as he pours hot water into the mugs. “Were you alone?”
I watch as he puts a teaspoon of powdered creamer into each mug, and stirs. “No, I was with Trey.” He hands me my coffee. I take a sip, it burns my lips, I place my mug on the table.
Dad leans against the cupboards and cradles his mug in his big hands. “He seems like a nice boy, but I worry that he’ll take advantage of you. I’m sure he meets lots of girls who are here on vacation, I don’t want you get hurt.”
I throw my arms around his waist, he almost spills his coffee. He rests his mug on the counter. I lay my head against his chest and squeeze him tight. “I love you Dad. Don’t worry, I’m not taking it seriously and I won’t do anything I’ll regret.”
“All you ever think about are boys.” I turn my head to see Jake standing in the doorway. He’s wearing his Batman pyjamas and his hair is sticking up.
Dad walks over and smooths down Jake’s hair. “Give it a few more years Jake, and girls will be the only thing on your mind,” he says.
Jake frowns at me. “If you dump Trey, like you do to all your other boyfriends, he won’t be my friend no more.” He rubs his eyes. “You always ruin things.”
“We’re going to see the seals today Jake,” Dad says, changing the subject. I head upstairs to take a shower.
“We’re just in time to see them being fed,” Jake calls out. It’s a dull, cloudy day but it hasn’t stopped people coming out, and there’s quite a crowd standing around the enclosure. Jake has managed to find a spot, and he’s leaning over the barrier. I stand back to let some little kids go in front of me. A man has a bucket full of fish, he’s throwing them one at a time and the seals are catching the fish in their mouths. I hold my phone up and take a picture. Dad has brought his SLR with the zoom lens. He takes great pictures, but I hate it when he wants to include us in his photo because he takes so long. We usually end up with a line of people waiting to walk by, it’s embarrassing. I hear a splash as one of the larger seals dives into the water. They look so graceful when they swim. I think back to this morning, when Trey ran into the sea fully clothed. He scared me, though he’s probably a good swimmer because he can go to the beach every day. I frown. Am I becoming too attached to him?
We’ve spent a couple of hours at the seal sanctuary and now we’re looking for somewhere to eat. Jake points out a pizza restaurant. It’s busy but we’re able to get a table. We’re all hungry so we order two large meat feasts. I watch Mum as she rests her head on Dad’s shoulder; he puts his arm around her. They’re still in love after twenty years of marriage. I want that, a true love that lasts. I want a house, kids, pets, the whole nine yards. I’m not career minded, I figure I can make music, and hopefully make money, while still having a life and a family. The waitress brings up our pizzas, they smell good and we all dig in.
As Dad pays for our meal, my phone beeps. It’s Trey, asking what time I’ll be back. I guess he’s standing on the hill texting me, being the only place there is a signal. He’s fun to be with, but is he using me? And even if he isn’t, how can we have a relationship when there will be three-hundred miles between us? It’s a short term thing; I can’t let myself get too close. I type a message, telling him we’ll be back late, and I won’t be able to see him today.
While Mum puts the kettle on to make tea, Dad and Jake take a look at the board games the owners have left at the cottage. “They’ve got Monopoly,” Dad says. “Does anyone fancy a game?”
Mum is all for it, she’s a shark when it comes to Monopoly. Dad and Jake set up the board on the dining table in the kitchen. I wonder if I can patch things up with Antonio when I get home. Or maybe I shouldn’t bother, I’m sure to meet new guys when I start university. I sip my hot, sweet tea while Dad gives everyone their money. I snatch up the racing car and Jake chooses the dog, as always. Mum begins and throws a six, she’s going to win, she always does. “Where shall we go tomorrow?” Dad asks.
“Goonhilly,” says Jake. “It sounds awesome. They have satellites.”
It’s my turn and I throw a two, whoopie! Dad starts talking about his work. He’s an industrial chemist, and the company he works for is being taken over. Mum lands on a good property and immediately buys it. “When your dad drives you to university, I’ll come as well,” she says. “I want to see your accommodation.”
“If you want,” I tell her, “but it’s just a bedroom. I’ll be sharing a common area with Fay and a few other students.”
“Make sure you eat properly,” Mum says.
I throw the dice and land on a Chance square. “I will, stop worrying Mum. It’s six weeks until I leave.”
“Can I have her room when she goes?” Jakes asks. “It’s bigger than mine.”
Dad smiles and shakes his head. “She’ll be coming home during the breaks, Jake.”
I buy a few properties but don’t get a set. Mum has already got several hotels and it’s not long before I land on the most expensive one and am out of the game. I curl up on the sofa with my book, but every few minutes I hear mum shout out, ‘I own that, you owe me,’ and I just can’t focus. I put my book down and switch on the TV. I skip past the news channels, they’re always depressing. I have the choice of an old re-run of a sitcom, or a cookery show. My idea of cooking is to heat something in the microwave, quick and easy so that I can get on and do something more interesting. The chef is cooking something made with squid ink, ugh. Maybe I will go and see Trey; I’ll be okay if I remember it’s just fun, nothing serious. It’s got to be better than watching this.
“I’m heading out, I’m going to see Trey,” I tell them.
“Okay, have fun,” Mum says, without looking up from the board. Jake is focused on lining up the houses he’s just bought.
“Remember, be careful,” Dad says.
Feeling some light raindrops, I pull my hood up. The streets are deserted. I hear voices and music coming from the pub, but no one is sitting outside tonight. I press Trey’s doorbell. He answers, and my gaze is drawn to his bare chest. I raise my head and force my eyes to meet his. He’s rubbing a towel over his hair, he must have just got out of the shower. His eyes are wide and his cheeks look pale.
“Pia. What are you doing here? Is something wrong?”
My mouth goes dry. “Erm, no. We got back earlier than I expected, so I can see you tonight after all.” I can hear female voices and laughter coming from inside. “But if I’ve caught you at a bad time…”
He throws his towel on the floor and steps outside, pulling the door closed behind him. “I thought you weren’t coming,” he says. Clearly, and he certainly doesn’t want me looking, or going inside. I wonder what he’s hiding, a girlfriend maybe. I’m an idiot. I turn to leave. “Pia, wait.” He stands in front of me, his hands resting on my arms. “My mum’s in there with her friend, we wouldn’t have any privacy, you know.”
I stare into his eyes. His mum huh. I’m not sure what to believe, but if it is his mum, his excuse about privacy is pathetic because we haven’t got to go in his house, we could go out somewhere. “No problem, sorry I disturbed you.” I pull my arms from his and walk away, I can’t hear him following me. I glance back, he’s gone back inside and his door is closed. Tears prick my eyes; he didn’t even care enough to come after me. It’s the kick up the ass I needed, I’m not likely to see him again, and that will be a very good thing.
As I reach the road that leads to our cottage, I look towards the hill. I’m not in the mood to go back inside just yet. I find the flashlight app on my phone and use it to light my way as I head up the hill. The crickets sound loud but I can’t see them, they must be in the trees and bushes. I stop when I’m halfway up and lean against the wall. I should be able to get a signal here, but I’ll have to turn the flashlight off. I can do this, I haven
’t heard of anyone being mauled to death by crickets, I’ll be fine. I flick through my contacts till I find Fay.
“How’s it going?” she asks. She sounds her usual happy, bouncy self.
“Not so good, I met a guy.”
She squeals and I have to hold the phone away from my ear. “Oooh, tell me more. Is he good looking?”
I hope the crickets aren’t heading my way, I can’t see a thing. “Yeah, but he’s an asshole.” I move away from the wall, just in case there are insects on it.
“Ooookaaay. What happened?” she asks. I tell her and explain that he didn’t even try to stop me leaving. “Maybe he was telling the truth,” she says.
I pace around and around in a circle. “Even if he was, we could have gone to the beach instead, or to the pub.”
“Maybe he’s not allowed out,” she says.
I stop pacing. “Fay, that’s crazy. Of course he’s allowed out, he’s nineteen, not nine.”
She giggles. “Wait until we get to uni. I bet we’ll meet lots of hot guys, we can go out partying every night.”
I shake my head. “We won’t have the money for that.” It’s still raining and my clothes are clinging to my skin. It’s uncomfortable, I should go back.
“You’re a real ray of sunshine today, aren’t you,” she says.
“Yeah, I know. It’s raining, I’ve got to go.”
“Have fun and keep me updated,” she says.
I run back towards the cottage. I feel cold; I hope Mum has made some hot tea. Men, who needs them anyway.
CHAPTER TEN
Pia
Jake will have to see the satellites another time because Mum wanted to go to Tintagel today. It’s the home of King Arthur, not that I know much about that legend, except they sat at a round table. We’re looking around the castle ruins, it’s rugged and windswept. I can imagine being a Queen here, looking out at the sweeping view of the sea crashing into the rocks below. I think I might have enjoyed it back in those times, especially the knights on horseback. It’s hot and sunny, so there are lots of people here, but there’s plenty of space. I use my phone to take a photo of myself. It would be a nice picture if the wind hadn’t blown my hair everywhere; I look like I’ve been dragged through a bush. Oh well, I’m smiling and I managed to get some of the castle in the background. I send the photo to Fay and let her know that I’m feeling better today. A guide gives a talk to a group of tourists. I hear him telling them that the castle is reputed to be the birthplace of King Arthur.
My phone beeps. Fay has sent me a picture of herself, grinning like the Cheshire Cat. She adds that she’s told Antonio I’m straight and that someone else sent him that text, and that the date is back on. Several seagulls are circling above my head; they must have found food somewhere. I think back to what Trey said, that Antonio doesn’t want me badly enough if he gives up that easily. I text Fay and ask her to send Antonio the picture of me smiling, along with the message ‘date is off’. All the tourists are taking pictures with their expensive cameras, Dad is in good company. I get a message from Fay saying, ‘done’.
Having explored the castle, we’re now looking around the town. We’ve been into a pottery shop, those guys are talented. I tried using a wheel once, the clay just went everywhere, and collapsed into a squishy mess. We’ve found a bakery that makes their own pasties. “We can’t come to Cornwall and not have a Cornish Pasty,” Mum says. We go inside; it smells of freshly baked bread. The pasties look tasty, crisp and golden. I’m looking forward to trying one for the first time.
The man behind the counter is wearing a white overall and a white hat. “What’s in the pasties?” I ask him.
“They’re made from the traditional recipe,” he says, he has a slight accent. “Ground beef, potato, swede and onion.”
“Oh, that’s a shame, Pia,” Mum says.
Why does everything have onion in it? There are so many other seasonings to choose from, it’s hard to find food without onion. Mum orders three pasties, and I’m jealous because they smell delicious. I stop at a cafe and get a crab sandwich to take out, but it’s not the same, I wanted a pasty.
When we arrive back at the cottage, Mum bends down and retrieves something from the doorstep. “Who left this here?” she asks, as she holds up a pot plant. I recognise it; it’s a chocolate mint plant like the ones in Trey’s garden. There’s a red ribbon tied in a bow around the pot. I rub one of the leaves between my fingers, and sniff. Yes, it’s definitely a chocolate mint plant. “There’s a note here.” Mum picks up an envelope from the step. “It’s addressed to you, Pia,” she says as she hands it to me.
Dad and Jake sit down on the sofa and switch on the TV. Mum heads to the kitchen to make some tea. I go up to my room and put the chocolate mint on my bedside table. I sit on the bed and stare at the envelope, I don’t know whether to open it, or throw it in the trash. I guess I could open it and then throw it in the trash. I tear the envelope and pull out the note.
I figured you could use a chocolate fix. Please forgive me. I feel bad about yesterday; I did want to see you. I’ll be home all evening if you want to stop by.
I carefully fold the note and then tear it into little pieces. I grab my ipod, and poke my ear buds into my ears. I fall back onto the bed, close my eyes and listen to Try by Pink. When the song ends, I tap pause, pull out my ear buds and place my ipod back on the table. I don’t know if the song has affected me, but I want to see him, if only to get to the bottom of what happened last night.
I take a deep breath and press his doorbell. A few seconds later the door opens and my gaze travels from his bare feet, to his baggy, pale grey sweatpants that have a hole in the knee, up to his slim waist and bare chest. Finally, my gaze rises to his head, he has a huge grin plastered on his face. I wipe my sweaty palms on my jeans, and tear my eyes away from him to stare at the door frame. “Thanks for the chocolate mint,” I mutter. His hand reaches for mine, I force myself to focus on his face and not look down.
“Thanks for coming Pee Aitch. I’m sorry for yesterday, I missed you,” he says as he strokes his thumb across my fingers. He tugs on my hand and leads me through to the kitchen. As we pass the door to the lounge, I glance inside. No one is there, but the TV is on and there are a couple of beer cans on the table, along with a plate of half eaten food.
“Are you having dinner? I can come back later,” I say.
“Yeah. Have you eaten?”
I nod my head. “We stopped off to eat on the way back from Tintagel. I wanted to try a pasty but they all have onion in them, so I had to settle for a crab sandwich.” I pout. “Don’t let me disturb your meal.”
He smiles. “You’re not; I can heat it up later. Do you want a beer?”
I nod. Anything that distracts me from his body is a good idea. He opens the fridge and pulls out two cans, there’s a hiss as opens them. He hands one to me and I raise the can to my lips, it tastes cold, and good. He takes a long swig and wipes his lips with the back of his hand. “So, Pee Aitch, do you want to show me how you play guitar?”
“Erm,” I shrug. “If you want, but I haven’t played in a long time.”
I follow him into a large bedroom, which has a big window with a view of the garden. The only furniture is a single bed, and a closet. I sit down on the bed.
“Do you prefer acoustic, or electric?” he asks.
“Acoustic.”
He leaves the room, and returns holding a guitar, which he hands to me. I strum the strings and try to remember how to form chords but my fingernails have grown too long, so I can’t press down on the frets properly. He sits opposite me, on the floor, I’m embarrassed at my feeble attempt to play. “Is this your bedroom?” I ask.
He shakes his head, and takes another swig from his can. “So what are you going to play for me, Precious? What music do you like?”
I gaze down at my fingers as I pluck the strings randomly. “I like a bit of everything but I can’t remember how to play any songs, it’s been too long.” I lay
the guitar down on the bed. “So why have you brought me in here? Are you hiding some, deep, dark secret in your room?”
He screws up his face; he looks cute when he does that. “No, my room is tiny, there’s more space in here.”
I glance around; it looks like this is a spare or guest room because there are no personal items, no pictures, posters, not even a comb. “Then why don’t you move into this room?” I ask.
He stands and picks up his guitar, he plucks the strings one by one. “It’s my brother’s room,” he says.
His brother must be a minimalist. I guess its okay if you like that sort of thing, but I think the room lacks character. If it were me I’d want to put my stamp on it. Trey sits next to me on the bed and begins to play, his fingers move across the strings so easily and he’s not even looking at what he’s doing, his eyes are closed. He starts to sing, his voice is soft, but deep. I stare at him; he’s lost in his music. I listen to the lyrics, that if she had a rainbow, she would paint it black. “I’ve never heard that song before,” I say.
“It’s called Make it Rain, Sherman Robertson plays it better than I do,” he says.
I twirl the beer can around in my hands and glance around at the room again. “Does your brother spend much time in here?”
He reaches for his beer can and takes another swig. “He don’t live here anymore. This one’s for you, Pee Aitch.”
My lips tip up as I listen to the words, his voice gives me chills, I’ve never heard anyone sing with such feeling. It sounds like another blues song, he’s singing about me being his woman. I’m being serenaded for the first time in my life, my heart is fluttering. It’s beautiful, he’s beautiful but can I trust him? And even if I can, how will we overcome the distance. I remind myself that I must not get too close.
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