Never Say Never

by Tina Leonard

  “Seemed to,” Dustin replied.

  Jill frowned. Dustin glanced over his shoulder as they walked through the kitchen. Jill felt his gaze, and wondered why he wouldn’t elaborate on the secret adventure. Then she saw Joey warming his hands in front of the fireplace. “Are you cold, Joey?”

  Joey shook his head, though his bottom lip quivered. She noticed Joey’s gaze,was directed at his tall, well-built father. Ah. There was the model of testosterone Joey was trying to imitate.

  He was such a sweet child. “How did the man-to-man talk go?” she asked Dustin, taking Holly from him.

  “Fine. We have a souvenir from our outing that we’d like to present you with.”.

  “Where is it?” Jill asked, starting to become suspicious at both their innocent expressions. She had a funny feeling she might be about to pay for her earlier comment about Dustin.

  “It’s outside. We want you to close your eyes, and no peeking,” Dustin commanded.

  “All right.” Jill obediently closed her eyes, wondering what the two of them had cooked up. They were acting very shady about the whole matter. “Fortunately, I like mysteries.”

  Startled, Jill felt Dustin take hold of her hand. It was warm, despite his being outdoors recently. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders as he led her toward the front door, and Jill couldn’t help thinking that he smelled nice too. He felt big and strong and, well, just the way he looked like he might feel. Overwhelmingly masculine.

  “Watch your step,” Dustin said, easing her down from the front porch.

  Jill took small steps, praying she wouldn’t tumble to the bottom. Resisting the urge to peek, just a little, to get her bearings, she tried to make herself relax against the rancher.

  “You can look now!” Joey shouted.

  Jill opened her eyes to see that she was standing in front of Dustin’s truck. Joey was hopping up and down like mad by the truck bed, so Jill realized that what she was supposed to see was back there. Walking around, she spied the reason for all the delighted excitement.

  “A real Christmas tree! Oh, my! Did you cut this down yourself?” she asked Joey, instantly realizing that this was no store-bought tree.

  Joey glanced at Dustin for confirmation, who merely nodded. “Daddy showed me how.”

  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a nice, big tree,” Jill said for Joey’s benefit, though she couldn’t help noticing Dustin seemed appreciative of the flattery as well. He leaned against the truck bed, eyeing the tree proudly. “It’s beautiful.”

  Dustin shrugged, trying not to look too pleased. “Actually, it’s not even a real fir, but I thought it resembled a Christmas tree.”

  “It looks good to me.” Jill knew he’d done this for Joey, and for her, despite his own discomfort with the holidays. She’d have been touched if he’d appeared with a palm tree and decorated that with ornaments. “Let’s get it inside and see what we can do for decorations.”

  Dustin let the truck gate down, reaching in to lift the tree upright where he could get a good grasp on it. “Oh, I think you’ll find Mother is going to fix Joey up just fine in that department. She’s got more holiday spirit than anyone in Lassiter.”

  “Oh, good. Can I help you, Dustin?”

  “Yeah. Hold the front door open, will you?”

  Jill went on ahead, with Joey scooting through the door before Dustin carefully pointed the tree trunk into the entryway. “See if I can get this in here without tearing off any branches,” he muttered to himself.

  Jill propped open the door with her boot and tried to guide the tree from the top as he pulled from the other end. Suddenly it was lying in the entry hall—branches intact. “Looks like a professional job to me, Santa,” she told Dustin.

  “I’ve got good helpers.”

  They looked at each other for a moment and Jill began to feel something inside her glow. Then Joey called, “The tree stand is in here! Grandma’s got everything ready for us!”

  Eunice sat on the antique sofa, gesturing for Jill to hand her the baby. She held Holly up so the baby could watch the commotion of the tree being brought in and then painstakingly set down in the stand. Of course the baby didn’t know it was Christmas, but it was fun to think she was enjoying the fun. Jill brought in a pitcher of water from the kitchen and poured it into the stand.

  “Holly is modeling a new headband,” Eunice said, pushing the evergreen-colored satin away from Holly’s eyes. “Isn’t she adorable?” Without waiting for the obvious answer, she instructed, “The lights are in a box upstairs, Dustin.”

  “I’ll get them.” Jill started to leave, but Dustin closed his hand over hers.

  “I’ll do this, if you don’t mind rustling up some hot chocolate and maybe a snack. I think Joey’s hungry,” he said, cocking one eyebrow.

  Joey had eyes only for the tree that nearly reached the ceiling. He was obviously not thinking about food. Jill raised her brows but didn’t pull her hand away from Dustin’s. “I think it’s his dad who’s hungry.”

  Dustin nodded, and she shook her head at his playful side, a little surprised—and more attracted to him than she should be, she realized.

  “I’ll be right back with something to tide everyone over,” Jill said, walking from the parlor.

  In five minutes she was back with hot chocolate and a tray of chocolate chip cookies. Joey and Dustin took a break to grab up the treats, so Jill sat down next to Eunice to admire the men’s work.

  “Do you want me to hold Holly for a while?” she asked.

  “No.” Eunice smiled to take the brusqueness out of her answer. “I want to enjoy this little bundle of joy as long as I can.”

  Jill turned her gaze from the warm happiness shining from Eunice’s watery-blue eyes. Holly was the recipient of all this extra love and attention because Nina was lost to the Reeds this Christmas. She sighed to herself, wishing that there was something she could do to help. Unfortunately, there wasn’t anything she could do to make matters better. Glancing toward the mantel, Jill let her gaze run along the pewter-framed pictures of Joey.

  She stole a look at Dustin. He was showing Joey how to dunk his cookie into the chocolate until he saw Jill watching him. Sheepishly, Dustin shoved the cookie into his mouth with a shrug.

  “How about you help me start hanging the ornaments, Joey?” he asked.

  Joey ran to join his father, which Jill was glad to see. Holly had just about fallen asleep, so Eunice placed her into the basket, setting it out of harm’s way. The baby seemed mesmerized by the colorful, blinking Christmas lights that had been strung on the tree and seconds later, she closed her eyes.

  “She seems pretty secure, doesn’t she?” Eunice asked Jill. “Considering everything?”

  “I think she is. What’s not to feel secure about, though, if you’re part of the Reed household?”

  Jill got up, taking the tray with her into the kitchen, realizing how true her words were. Certainly she was flourishing under the kindness the Reeds had shown her. It was easy enough sometimes to imagine she was actually part of their family, and not just a woman who desperately wanted a fresh start in life. Of course, there was more to worry about with Holly, since her wellbeing had apparently been threatened, but perhaps Holly sensed her safety wasn’t jeopardized here. She had Dustin protecting her.

  Jill rinsed off the cookie plate, then meandered back to stand in the wide parlor doorway. Eunice was placing a festively patterned runner on top of the sideboard. Holly was still snoozing, and Joey was hanging ornaments in a tediously perfectionist manner. Dustin walked over to Jill and paused at her side.

  “If you don’t mind, I think I’ll go upstairs to wash up. I feel a little gritty after cutting down that tree. Think I’ve got pine needles down the back of my shirt.”

  Jill noticed the deep lines of weariness around Dustin’s eyes. Of course, he’d worked outside in the cold all day, then come home early to take Joey on his first tree-finding mission, but…there was something more in the depths of his da
rk eyes that she couldn’t quite fathom.

  She thought she saw sadness, a wearying kind of sadness. “You certainly deserve a break. Besides, I think you got everything started so well, Joey can finish decorating his first trophy tree by himself.”

  “Yeah.”

  Dawning pride beamed from his eyes as he glanced at his son, before he swung his gaze back to Jill. She started to say something, but Joey called out before she could speak.

  “You…you under the mistletoe, Daddy!”

  Jill’s gaze jumped upward. It was true. Eunice’s hands had been busy, and she’d not missed putting a sprig of mistletoe in the doorway, cleverly twined with a bright red ribbon.

  Joey asked, “You…you hafta kiss her now?” Jill’s eyes widened. Dustin’s gaze was pinned to hers. The weariness appeared to be gone, replaced by something else she wasn’t sure about. He paused, perhaps considering Joey’s words, maybe out of politeness. Surely he wasn’t going to…

  No. This was all wrong. Dustin was a grieving man. She was the housekeeper. Not knowing what to say, Jill turned and fled into the kitchen.

  Chapter Seven

  Jill’s quick escape had saved Dustin from making a stupid blunder. Kissing his housekeeper was not a good idea for all folks concerned. As much as he might have been tempted by the mistletoe, any fool knew that once he kissed Jill, nothing would ever be the same between them. In order for this relationship to work, it had to stay on an extremely formal, professional level. Otherwise, it was going to become even more awkward around the Regret Ranch.

  Still feeling unsteady despite this assessment of the matter, Dustin turned to his mother. “I’m going to shower. I have to go out tonight, and I don’t want my potential clients run off by the sawdust and tree leaves I’m wearing in my hair.” He paused, thinking about the expression on Jill’s face a moment ago. “Would you mention to Jill that I won’t be here for dinner after all? I’ve decided to treat the city boys to a real cowboy’s meal.”

  Eunice nodded. “Go ahead, Dustin. I’ll let Jill know the change in plans.”

  “Thanks.” Dustin stomped up the stairs, thinking that at least this way he could avoid Jill at the dinner table. Damn it, he had actually liked Joey’s strange suggestion. He had to get a hold on himself, though perhaps in the morning the whole situation would have blown over to his satisfaction.

  Eunice listened to her son walk upstairs before looking at Joey, who, completely unaware of the adult angst he’d stirred up, was engrossed in watching the tree lights sparkle. Actually, she thought Joey’s idea about a kiss had been a good one, and quite opportune. The thought had occurred to her as she’d hung the mistletoe up in its customary place that perhaps something fortuitous might come of it.

  The very way Dustin and Jill had reacted to the notion made Eunice smile. Electricity had sparked through the air as the two of them had stood stock-still, frozen with unconscious desire. It had been a rather unique moment to witness, those two people becoming aware of each other as .they hadn’t been before. Eunice pushed a tiny tendril of Holly’s hair away from her temple. She liked Jill. She wouldn’t mind at all if a little romance sprung up around the ranch, although neither Dustin nor Jill were exactly ready—or willing—for that to happen.

  However, more than one romance had started during the season of giving, and even the most carefully sealed hearts had been known to unwrap.

  After touring his big-city spenders around the ranch to show them the cattle and the way the operation was run, Dustin took them out to dinner. It was an experience he’d rather have foregone under normal circumstances, but with these two gentlemen ready to move the existing cattle stock they already had to his ranch, and perhaps buy a few of his steers to add to theirs, Dustin stood to add another layer of profit margin to the ranch account.

  But it was tough to entertain when his mind was on Jill. He hadn’t liked slipping out the front door without saying goodbye to her. Didn’t seem right somehow. At the time, of course, it had felt like the best thing to do. Now, sitting in the dimly lit interior of The Cattle Drive restaurant, across from two city slickers who thought they were hot stuff by wheeling and dealing in the commodity of beef, Dustin regretted his cowardice.

  The woman deserved at least a goodbye called to her in the kitchen as he walked out the front door. It wouldn’t have hurt anything. Dustin swallowed half his beer, then acknowledged that he’d been protecting his pride. A black-hearted monster inside him had whispered that Jill had looked mighty horrified that he might kiss her. That wasn’t the usual reaction a woman had to getting close to him. Delighted, expectant, hopeful, he’d prefer to think though not to be bragging. But he’d never yet seen a woman with the look that Jill had been wearing.

  It was a bit discouraging.

  The dime-store cowboys seated at his table were enjoying nodding at the local women who had no more brains than to be flirting with men they didn’t know. The fact that the men were with Dustin probably gave the waitress and her friend the notion that the strangers were okay dudes. But Dustin couldn’t help thinking that Jill wouldn’t openly flirt with a man she didn’t know.

  Hell. She wouldn’t even let her boots warm the floor under a mistletoe branch long enough to consider play-kissing a man she did know.

  Half an hour later, Dustin had said goodbye to the men and waved them off onto the main road where they could head back to Houston. They’d been impressed with his outfit, as he’d expected. The Reed Ranch was a fine place to keep stock and Dustin was proud that they’d agreed on a good deal. All in all, it had been a very prosperous evening.

  He paid his bill, then left the dinner table to sit at the bar. There was a television high up in the corner and a football game was on the screen. Just one more beer—five more minutes to give Jill time to be in bed so he wouldn’t have to see her—and he’d head on home. He knew it was chicken-hearted, plain and simple.

  “Hey, Dustin.”

  The sheriff slid onto the barstool next him. Dustin was glad to see him.

  “You off duty?”

  “Yep.” Marsh whisked a hand over his checked shirt and grinned. “Even the sheriff gets an occasional Saturday night off.”

  “You got a date?”

  “Naw. Looks like you’re having a dry night as well.”

  Dustin sipped his beer. “I like it that way.”

  “Shoot. That’s not what we used to say when we were teenagers. If we didn’t have a date on Saturday night, we cowered at home playing pool or watching TV.”

  “I don’t remember too many of those nights,” Dustin said with a shrug.

  “Fortunately. Or we might have gone crazy with hormones.”

  Leaning back on the barstool, his gaze glued to the television set, Dustin said, “I like it better this way.”

  “What? You like being without a woman on Saturday night?”

  “Women have a tendency to drain the sanity out of your soul.” His tone was ironic.

  “Hm.” Marsh thought about that for a minute, nodding his thanks to the woman who laid a beer down in front of him without noticing her I-can-get-off-early-tonight smile. “Why do I get the funny idea you’re not referring to Nina this time?”

  He shook his head, not wanting to discuss what had happened. Or the discomfort it had worked up inside him. “I’m not referring to anybody.”

  Dustin could feel Marsh’s stare on him. “How come you won’t look at me when you say that?”

  “Because you’re so damn ugly.”

  Marsh laughed. “Because you’re lying. Something’s got your underwear bunched.”

  Dustin sighed, giving up the pretense that he was watching the TV when they both knew he wasn’t. “I got talked into putting up a Christmas tree today.”

  “That seems pretty normal for this time of year.”

  “Yeah.” Dustin snorted. “Well, that meant decorations, and you know my mother has never skimped on the holiday doodads.”

  “Always looks like Mrs. Claus’s house,”
Marsh agreed cheerfully.

  “You’re a hell of a friend,” Dustin complained, eyeing Marsh with a help-me-out-here expression. “Anyway, I found myself standing under the mistletoe with Jill.”

  “Oh, I like that idea.” Marsh’s eyes lit up.

  “Don’t like it too much,” Dustin growled. “That’s my mistletoe.”

  “Yeah. But not your lady.”

  Dustin didn’t like the smug look on Marsh’s face one bit. “No, and she ain’t looking, so don’t be thinking,” he growled.

  “How do you know she’s not looking?”

  He paused. For a man, this was a humiliating thing to have to admit, even to his best friend of many years. “She didn’t want me to kiss her while we were under the mistletoe, as Joey called it.”

  “That’s supposed to mean she ain’t looking? Sounds like she just ain’t looking for you.” Marsh took a long swallow of beer before putting the mug down quickly. “Hey, what made you think you should kiss her, anyway? You’re not usually moving this fast, Dustin. I’m surprised at you.”

  “It was Joey’s idea,” Dustin said. “He pointed out our location, asked if I had to kiss her, and damn my soul if the thought didn’t appeal to me before I realized how stupid it was.”

  “You were actually going to do it?” Marsh’s eyes were round.

  “Well, I’m not sure. But I was giving the idea some thorough consideration.”

  “And while you were pondering this life-altering matter, the lady in question made good her escape.” Marsh hit the bar with his palm, laughing uproariously.

  “I wish she’d thought it was so funny,” Dustin complained. “Instead she looked like somebody’d given her a whack on the rear.”

  “Uh-oh.” Marsh paused to wipe his eyes. “And your pride took a meltdown.”

  “Well, my mother was in the room, and—hell, yeah. It was awkward.”