When we pulled up in front of the house, Beau parked up a ways, underneath a tree and away from the glaring light of the overhead streetlamps. He killed the Dodge Ram’s engine as he turned to face me with a big smile.
“I had a great time tonight,” he said.
“I did too, thank you,” I answered as I undid my seat belt and started to reach for my purse which was on the floor between my feet. I opened my door and hopped down onto the asphalt, not wanting to wait for him to come around and open the door for me. Truth be told, I was eager to get back to my room so I could crawl into bed and hopefully talk to Dani for a little while if she was still awake. I figured she’d be happy to know I was no longer interested in Beau. Who my target should be from this point on was a complete and total mystery to me, but I hoped I’d find one soon.
“It’s cold out here,” Beau said as he walked around the truck and stopped in front of me, taking a step forward as I took a step back, my butt pressing up against the truck. It was then that I realized just how huge this guy was. He towered over me by more than a head and was easily twice my width.
“Yeah, so I should probably get back to my room so you can get back into the truck so we both don’t freeze out here,” I said with a tremulous laugh as I wrapped my arms around myself. It wasn’t in response to the cold, though—more because I was uncomfortable. There was just something about Beau that made me feel ill-at-ease. I couldn’t put my finger on it, though. Maybe I just didn’t know him that well.
Beau nodded and appeared to be thinking about what I’d just said. “So, are you going to invite me up?” he asked a second or so later, sounding and looking hopeful.
I immediately felt myself frowning as a surge of offended anger began to bubble up inside of me. Who the hell did he think he was? “I hadn’t planned on it,” I answered honestly, no amount of apology in my tone.
“Really?” he asked, his eyebrows furrowing as he looked completely surprised. “I gotta admit I didn’t expect you to say no.”
“Why?” I demanded incredulously.
He didn’t say anything for a few seconds. When I was about to repeat my question, he simply grabbed me around the waist and pulled me into him as he slammed his lips down on my mouth. I was so shocked, I didn’t have time to react, and before I knew it, his tongue was invading my mouth, seeking out my tongue. I could taste the alcohol on him and it was bitter and pervasive. I thrust my hands against his chest, trying to push him away, but he only held on to me tighter.
He pushed his pelvis into mine at the same time that I felt his hands suddenly moving up my thighs and underneath my skirt. Needing to free myself from his kiss, I slammed my head back, banging it into the truck behind me, but I didn’t care. I needed to extricate myself from him as quickly as possible.
“Stop!” I said once my mouth was free.
“Mmm, you feel so good,” he answered as he smiled down at me and his hands circled my butt while he pulled me against his obvious erection. I felt sick to my stomach.
“I’m serious, Beau, let go of me,” I answered in no uncertain terms.
“Stop playing hard to get, baby,” he said as he continued to grab me and I continued to try to separate myself from him. But because of the fact that he was much bigger than I was, I was basically at his mercy. There was no way I was forcing him away from me. The only way I was going to be able to extricate myself from him was with words.
But my words, so far, weren’t getting me very far.
“I’m not playing hard to get,” I insisted. “I’m just not interested in having sex with you. So that means I want you to let go of me and I want you to do it now or I’m going to start screaming.”
He immediately released me and stepped back, thank God. I took a deep breath and smoothed my skirt down as the sweet feeling of relief flooded me. Now I just had to get away from him and back to my room.
“What’s your fucking deal?” he demanded as he glared at me.
“I have no deal,” I answered as I attempted to sidestep him before this conversation became any uglier. He grabbed me by my upper arm and held me in place as I pulled against him, but it did no good.
“In case you don’t remember, I’ve already had you,” he spat at me. “So you need to stop whatever stupid game you’re playing, because it’s not like this is the first time.”
“Let go of me,” I seethed at him as I forcefully yanked my arm back. He released me at the same time, and I immediately started to wobble in my high heels. It felt like time stood still as I wondered if I could right myself, but I lost my balance and fell. I landed right on my ass on the cold cement as my purse landed beside me, everything inside of it spilling all over the sidewalk. I could feel my cheeks burning with humiliation as Beau looked down at me and laughed.
“You weren’t worth the effort anyway,” he said with a snicker as he shook his head, grabbed his keys from his pocket and started for the driver’s side of his truck.
I forced myself to keep my cool as I pushed myself back up to my feet and, reaching for my purse, began collecting all my things. I heard the sound of Beau turning the engine on, and once he pulled into the street, I turned to watch the taillights glowing red as he turned the corner and disappeared from view.
And that was when I lost it. Tears immediately started as I tried to catch my breath and talk myself down off the ledge. But it didn’t do any good. I had never felt so humiliated before. Actually, I felt more than just humiliation. My emotions were running the gamut from fear that Beau was going to force himself on me to regret that I’d ever even considered going out with him again, to anger that he would talk to me the way he had and finally to intense shame and humiliation based on his parting words.
At the thought that I would have to go upstairs and face Dani and tell her everything that just happened, I cried even harder. I couldn’t stomach the idea of facing anyone at the moment, not when I was so mortified. Instead, I took a seat on the curb, relishing the fact that I was surrounded by darkness and no one could see me. Yes, it was cold outside, but I couldn’t say I cared.
No sooner did the thought cross my mind than my phone started buzzing with an incoming call. I reached for it, wondering if it might be Beau and all the while hoping that it was so I could give him a piece of my mind. But the caller ID revealed that it was Derek. Why he was calling me at eleven at night I didn’t know, but I also didn’t want to find out. So I didn’t answer it. Instead, I watched the screen as the phone vibrated in my hand two times, then three. On the fourth vibration, I clicked to answer although I wasn’t sure why.
“Hello?” I said, doing my best to sound like I wasn’t crying.
“Why’d it take you so long to answer?” Derek demanded, sounding perturbed.
“Um,” I started before taking a deep breath as I tried to keep control of myself.
“Nik?”
“I, uh,” I started before taking another deep breath as I begged myself not to lose control. “I just was … dealing with a bad situation,” I finished, forcing the words out as my voice cracked and the tears came doubly strong.
“Nikki, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” Derek asked, sounding concerned, the former annoyance in his tone now completely missing.
“I don’t know,” I responded honestly as I closed my eyes and tried to convince myself to stop crying. I hated the thought that I sounded completely pathetic.
“Where are you?”
“Sitting outside the sorority house,” I answered between sobs.
“Are you alone?”
“Yeah,” I answered.
“Go inside! It’s not safe to be outside by yourself in the middle of the night!”
“It’s not the middle of the night,” I answered.
“That’s not the point. You shouldn’t be outside, alone in the dark.”
“I don’t want to see anyone.”
“Well, you’re going to see me because I’m on my way.” I could already hear the clinking of his keys as he walked with th
em.
“I’m okay, Derek, you don’t have to come,” I started, feeling stupid that I was sitting in the dark crying by myself and now Derek was getting involved. The last thing in the world I wanted to see was the expression in his eyes when I told him what had just happened. “I don’t want you to come, Derek,” I said with more force this time.
“Well, get used to disappointment,” he answered sternly. “Because I don’t give a shit what you want. I’m on the way.”
“I’m okay, really,” I insisted.
“And that’s why you’re crying by yourself outside and in the dark?” I didn’t respond, so he continued. “Stay where you are. I’ll be there in two minutes.”
He hung up the phone, probably because he didn’t want me to try to argue with him. I put my phone back in my purse as I dropped my head into my hands and wished I hadn’t answered it. I just didn’t want Derek to be involved in such a personal and stupid situation. This whole mess was my fault because Dani was right—I never should have considered having anything to do with Beau again. Maybe all of this served me right.
How can you even think that? I yelled at myself. This is not your fault! Beau is an asshole and you’re lucky he didn’t try to take further advantage of you!
I was spared the opportunity to continue to lambaste myself because headlights in the distance arrested my attention. Seconds later, Derek pulled up in front of me and killed the engine. I swallowed hard as I tried to figure out just how much I wanted to tell him.
“Nik,” he said as he walked around the Bronco and, seeing me, gathered me into his arms. I wrapped my arms around him as he held me, suddenly feeling as if I were safe. I exploded into a new mess of tears, partially because I knew I couldn’t think of Derek the way I was thinking about him, and that realization hurt.
“What happened?”
He asked, so I told him everything. Well, almost everything. I left out the part about the fact that I’d planned on using Beau as my target for my femme fatale training. In fact, I left The Femme Fatale Handbook out completely. I figured that was a little tidbit that no one, aside from Dani and me, ever needed to know about, especially since this whole Beau-seduction-attempt would go down as my worst decision to date.
After I’d managed to spit it all out in between sobs, I collapsed back against Derek’s chest and I took a deep breath.
“It’s okay,” he crooned into my ear. “I’ve got you, Nik. It’s okay.”
“Thank you,” I whispered as I held him and closed my eyes, feeling like I was exactly where I belonged. Being in Derek’s arms felt so right, so good. It felt like home.
THIRTY-ONE
The Femme Fatale Handbook
Part Two: Putting all of this to use
Chapter Twelve: The Art of Subtlety
Seduction is a game, as I have said before. It is the art of getting what you want from someone who doesn’t realize you’re playing him. He gives willingly and freely, never aware of the fact that you’re playing him, that you’re in control. One of the best ways to ensure you win this game is to make him think he’s the one calling all the shots. It’s important to remember that people, in general, hate the idea of being manipulated. If he catches on to you, he will reject you because he will hate the idea that he was making decisions that he didn’t want to make. The key here, then, is to make him believe that he’s doing things and acting in ways that are according to his own self-interests. You have to make sure he never realizes that you’re the one who’s really at the wheel.
So how do you do that? First, you have to understand the ins and outs of mastering the art of subtle persuasion. Subtle persuasion is the act of dropping hints and ideas into the minds of others in such a subtle way that they mistakenly believe these thoughts are their own. They don’t realize that you’re the one orchestrating, that you’re the puppet master to their puppet. Think of it like you basically duping him into believing that whatever it is you want him to do is something he wants to do.
Now, before you start thinking I’m talking about hypnotism or something like that, I’m not. You drop these subtle hints while he’s awake so, no, this doesn’t require a trip to the local psychic or hypnotist. What you must do is start thinking in terms of being discrete, speaking in imprecise ways, dropping hints rather than coming right out and saying what you want. You have to create your own language of veiled meaning, unclear comments and indefinable suggestions that will penetrate his mind later. Insinuation is something that doesn’t work right away—it’s something that needs to sit in the subconscious for a little while. It’s something that needs to build in the back of his mind before it moves to the forefront.
The power of suggestion is much more potent than directness, and it will work on a much grander level if you allow it to. All you have to do is plant the seed and his mind will take care of the rest.
Subtlety looks like this—dropping small offhand remarks about some emotional topic, maybe something that is lacking in your life or his. Think of some unfulfilled wish or desire of his or yours. When you first make a remark about whatever it is, the subject won’t be important enough to be discussed at the moment. But, later, when you’re apart, it will come back to visit him, and he might even be surprised by it.
The key is to figure out what it is that’s lacking in his life. Is he bored? Speak in the subtle language of adventure. Is he stressed out? Speak the language of relaxation, of calmness. Learn to speak whatever language it is that he needs to hear. And when you speak this language, bring up subtle suggestions or ideas that you just as quickly abandon.
The key time to make these comments is when he isn’t paying attention—when he’s thinking about something else or he’s not aware of where the conversation is headed. Then, in a very offhand manner, you just drop a little carrot which appears to be forgotten but is later picked up on. And don’t only rely on your spoken language. Use the language of your body to get your point across as well as the language of words.
Seduction is the art of mystery. Remember that most people are predictable and boring. They say exactly what they think and feel and you can figure them out in a day or two. Femme fatales are the opposite. They speak their own language of insinuation and suggestion. They speak of things that are, as of yet, unfulfilled. They are never straightforward. Remember to always think of seduction as a game. He will be in the position of guessing what all your hidden remarks, subtle suggestions and veiled hints mean.
Remember, it is always easier to catch flies with honey than it is with vinegar. And the same applies with men. Rather than hitting them over the head with your wants and needs, be subtle. You will find it will get you much further.
***
DEREK
I couldn’t remember ever being this angry before. After Nikki finished telling me how that asshole Beau had forced his hands on her, even after she’d told him to stop, I wanted to go pay him a visit myself. And, yes, I’d had to swallow down my jealousy at the thought that she’d willingly had sex with such an asshole in the first place. Especially when she wouldn’t give herself to me and I would never treat her in such a despicable manner.
“Let me walk you to your room,” I said as she clung to me, shivering in the cold night air. I’d already taken my jacket off and wrapped it around her shoulders, but the poor thing was still freezing.
“No,” she insisted as she obstinately shook her head. “I don’t want to see or talk to anyone right now.”
“Well, you can’t stay out here, Nik,” I pointed out the obvious.
“Can I come back with you to your place?” she asked, momentarily shocking me until I realized she wasn’t trying to come on to me. She just really didn’t want to go back to her own room. I took a deep breath and considered her request for a second or so, just to make sure I could really act the part of the gentleman and be the friend she needed.
“Of course you can,” I said as I started toward the Bronco and opened the passenger door for her. “I have a guest room you
can stay in.”
“Okay,” she said with a smile, the only one I’d seen from her so far this evening. “Thank you, Derek,” she finished with a sniffle as she buckled herself in and then smiled at me again. “I really appreciate you being there for me.”
“I’m your friend, Nik, it’s what I’m here for.”
She nodded. “I just want you to know how grateful I am for you.”
I didn’t say anything because I suddenly felt uncomfortable. Why, I wasn’t sure. I just wasn’t good at this nice guy stuff. Yes, of course I valued our friendship and I cared about Nikki more than I’d cared for any other woman save my own mother, but there was still something that just felt wrong about this. The more I thought about it, the more I realized exactly what it was. I was taking her back to my place. That was the thought that was causing me some level of concern. Why? Because whenever I took women back to my place, it was for one express purpose.
Well, you’re not going to have sex with her, so get those thoughts out of your head, asshole! I said to myself and instantly felt ashamed for having even thought them in the first place. What kind of selfish prick was I that Nikki was coming to me for support and all I could think about was getting her into my bed? God, I was such a piece of shit.
“Derek?” she asked, pulling my attention away from my inner diatribe.
“Yeah?”
“Do you think badly of me?” she asked, her eyes still glassy with tears. Her mascara and eyeliner had smudged all over her eyes and upper cheeks so she looked like a raccoon. I smiled at her because to me she looked cute as hell.
The Handbook_A Contemporary Teacher Romance Page 22