by Molly Bryant
“Are grandma and grandpa staying here, mom?” I said a little quieter completely forgetting that they could be here.
“Yes, they are staying in Nessy's old room,” she sighed, setting her coffee mug back onto the counter. “For the love of your grandmother,” she shook her head. “If I have to hear about her corns bothering her one more minute, I swear I'll...”
“You'll do what mom?” I laughed.
“I haven't figured it out yet,” she smiled, I could see that her eyes were heavy.
“Goodnight, son.” she said walking out of the kitchen and to the stairs.
“Night, Mom.” I smirked, then finished my cup of tea. I set my cup in the sink and grabbed my bag.
I quietly walked up the stairs and down the hallway, I shook my head as I heard my fathers snoring echoing down the hallway. I remember sneaking out of my parents house was usually an easy feat. All you had to do was listen for the snoring, and I do not care what my mother says... she snores too.
I walked into my room and flicked the light on seeing that my mother changed absolutely nothing of my bedroom since the last time I was here for their Anniversary dinner. I had brought Jackie with me the last time, and absolutely zero action happened in here as she drank so much, she passed out. I was slightly irritated that she let herself get so trashed, especially at my parents house. I made sure we left early the next morning before anyone could witness her demise. She threw up the entire way home, all over her, myself, and my car. Normally I am a real sympathetic guy when it comes to someone I care about being ill, but for some reason her actions annoyed me to no end.
“Room, sweet room,” I mumbled to myself. I set my bag down by the door and looked around. I saw my old football and baseball trophies, along with many pictures of me and old friends from high school; some were at parties, some were from my Junior and Senior prom, and multiple camping trips. I also had a photo of me and Vanessa with both of my parents on my dresser. I smiled at it with a sudden feeling of guilt at how I treated my sister when I left her house tonight. A part of me is kicking myself because she deserved it after what she has caused between Maria and me, but the other part is that she is still my sister.
I changed into a pair of sweats and grabbed my cell phone. I was hoping to see a text from Maria, but there weren't any. Just one from my sister.
I am sorry about everything. You're my brother and I love you, I will fix this. Call me and let me know you made it okay.
I smiled at the apology. I was thankful that she finally had it in her to apologize.
“Ethan?” she answered sounding rather groggy from sleep. “I am so sorry,”
“It's okay, Nessy,” I said quietly trying not to wake anyone.
“No, it's not,” I heard her sigh. “I ruined my friendship with Maria, and I said things I shouldn't have. It was none of my business to even tell her you were off limits. It just wasn't,”
“No it wasn't,” I agreed with her. “But, I forgive you,”
“Thanks,”
“Have you apologized to Maria? She is the person you need to apologize to,” I reminded her. I wasn't the one she truly, truly hurt with her words.
“No, I need to,” I could hear it in her voice that she is nervous to talk to her. “I don't know what to say,”
“Just tell her the same thing you told me, Vanessa. That you're sorry,” I laughed. Apologizing to Maria should be no different than apologizing to me.
“Do you like her, Ethan?” she paused. “A lot, lot?”
I smiled. “Nessy, yes. I like her a lot, lot,”
“Did you tell her that?” she asked.
“Nope,” I sighed. “I never had the chance,”
“Oh, my gosh! Ethan!” she said loudly.
“Oh, my gosh... what!” I laughed.
“No this is serious!” she gasped. “I think the other night when she was crying and told me that something bit her, she was referring to her feelings for you!” she paused. “I messed it all up!”
“Now she gets it!” Ben yells in the background.
“It's okay, Vanessa-” she cut me off.
“No, no it's not! She was at dinner with Marc,” she snorted. “Well, I assume it's Marc, and it's all my fault. I scared her, Ethan!” she was shrilling into the phone. “I have to fix it, bye! Wait... love you, bye.” she said, her words jumbled together then hung up on me before I could get another word in.
“Wow,” I stared at my phone. Chics are crazy.
I laid in bed and scrolled through the pictures on my phone. I finally came to the picture I was looking for, a picture of Maria that day at Central Park when we were sitting in the shade under a Maple tree. She had fallen asleep with her head in my lap and she looked completely at ease so I snapped a picture of her.
I stared at her pink lips, the rosy tint to her cheeks from being in the sun for most of the day, her soft delicate hands draped over her slender waist, and her long brown hair that fell around her from running my fingers through it. It's been one day since I have touched her, and yet it feels as though it has been an eternity. Since I met Maria, not only did I discover what being in love truly feels like, I also learned that it freaking sucks.
~
Vanessa had called me early in the morning to ask me if I could meet her which was unfortunate because I had less than five hours of sleep. I was nervous as I walked into Glow's building but was somewhat thankful when my nervousness was instantly replaced with irritation. A flower delivery guy with the biggest bouquet of red roses was walking in front of me and I could see nothing. I tried to maneuver around him hoping to get to the elevator first, only for him to sidestep out of on-comers ways and cutting me off. As anxious as I was knowing I had to walk past Maria's desk, it made me that much more intent on getting there faster so I could get it over with. I ended up following the flower delivery guy to the third floor, down the hallway, and wouldn't you know it... he set them on Maria's desk. I quickly hid behind the wall so I could listen.
“Are you Maria Anderson?” he asked her. I peered around the wall.
“Uh, yeah,” she slowly stood from her chair looking beautiful as ever in a black silk top and mini skirt. She carefully studied the roses.
“Those are for you,” he smiled then turned to walk away. “Have a nice day!” he hollered over his shoulder.
“Yeah, yeah,” she blew him off not taking her eyes off of the roses, she searched for a card or anything that would hint as to who they were from. Unfortunately, they weren't from me. But, I did have a pretty good idea who they were from.
I jumped back as Vanessa whipped her office door open. “Maria, have you seen-” when her words cut off, I peered back around the wall. Her eyes were wide as she stared at the roses. “Wow. Who are those for?”
“Me...” Maria shrugged. “I guess,” she delicately touched a pedal.
Vanessa walked to the roses and searched through them. “Oh! Here, let's see who they are from,” she smiled. Opening the mini envelope. Maria stood there, fidgeting with her hands nervously as she waited for Vanessa to read the card.
“Maria, these beautiful roses do you no justice. Wishing you a wonderful day... keep your chin up. Marc xoxo” Vanessa slightly frowned. I think she was hoping I had sent them. I wish I had.
I looked over at Maria who looked slightly let down, but only for a moment. She forced a smile. “How sweet!” she took the card from Vanessa and re-read it as she plopped down in her chair.
“So, um. Have you seen my brother yet?” she asked, looking around.
Maria's head snapped up, looking at Vanessa curiously. “No, why?”
“He is supposed to be coming in for a few minutes so we can have a first look at the July issue,” Vanessa wiggled her brows.
“Oh,” Maria laughed lightly. “When he gets here I will send him in,”
“Thank you,” Vanessa started to fidget, she was wanting to apologize for everything but was extremely nervous. It's not very often you see my sister squirm, she was no
w.
“Maria?” she took a step closer to her desk.
“What's up?” Maria looked up from her computer.
“Look, I am really sorry about the other night,” Vanessa sat on top of her desk. “It was wrong for me to say that things that I did. I didn't mean any of it. It was more out of shock, I guess.” she made a face of disgust. “I mean, it's not everyday you see your brother with his hands down someones pants,”
Maria smiled, waving her hand dismissively. “It's okay,”
“No, it isn't,” Vanessa let her head fall back as she sighed. “I ruined what could have been a really good thing for you and my brother. Just-” she pursed her lips trying to find the right words. “Just, don't single him out just yet, okay? He is a good guy and I know that he cares about you, a lot,” she smiled knowingly at Maria who was sitting there in shock at my sisters words.
“I forgive you, Vanessa,” she said, completely ignoring what Vanessa said about me which felt like I got punched in the face. “I am sorry that I kept what happened between your brother and me a secret. It was wrong, I should have told you,”
“You know what?” Vanessa stood to her feet. “Let's just forget about it and move on. Can we do that?” she held her arms out for a hug. I rolled my eyes, woman are unbelievable.
“I'd like that,” Maria jumped from her chair with a smile and hugged Vanessa tightly. “I love you, Vanessa,” she squealed.
“I love you too!” they laughed. I had heard enough.
I walked around the wall. “I didn't know you swung that way, sis,” I smirked.
Vanessa looked at me, “You're such a pig,”
“Maria,” I smiled.
“Hey, Ethan,” she didn't look at me. She sat down in her chair and continued on the computer.
“Come on, Ethan. We have a magazine to look at,” Vanessa clapped her hands awfully excited. I kept my eyes on Maria as I walked by her desk. Maria didn't look up at me, not even once. I closed Vanessa's door behind me with a sigh. I plopped down into one of the leather chairs in front of her desk.
“Are you okay, Ethan?” Vanessa grabbed the magazine from the top of her desk and sat down in the chair next to me.
“No,” I shook my head. “I'm not,”
She placed her hand on my leg. “Just give her time,”
“Time? For what, Nessy?” I looked at her. “Time for her to move on to Marc? Yeah, I was around the corner listening. I know she got flowers from the asshole. I was behind the damn flower guy the whole way up here,” I stared back down to the carpet.
“She doesn't like him, I know she doesn't,” she said quietly. “Did you see the look on her face when I read the card? She wasn't the slightest phased by it,”
“Please,” I huffed.
“I think she went out with Marc as a tool to forget about you for a moment. Think about what she would go through if she were alone. You know?”
“All I have is time to think about her, and yes it drives me crazy. But I deal with it, because I have feelings for her,” I traced my finger down an indent in the arm of the chair. “it's only a normal thing to do, you know?”
“Maria is not normal. Neither am I,” she snorted. “You would not believe the things I went to just to try and forget Ben. I was... ridiculous,” her last words was drawn out from her lips, she then gasped. “You raped his pride...” she whispered.
I laughed. “Who raped what, now?”
“You!” she jumped from her chair.
“Whoa, I didn't rape anyone,” I sat up straight in my chair, a bit uncomfortable by her accusation.
She shook her head. “No,” she sat back down and looked at me. “Do you remember what you said to me when I was going through my issues with Ben?”
I thought about it for a moment. “Nope, I don't,”
“You told me to stop being so stubborn, and that I raped Ben's pride,” she said as though I should know where this is going.
“Okay,” I urged her to go on.
“You are being stubborn and are raping yourself of your own pride,” she scooted her chair closer to me. “If you love her, don't let her go. You know how to handle this, Ethan. You are the one who helped me realize that I truly am in love with Ben. No one else but you,” she smiled.
“Do you really think that I would let her go that easily?” I smirked. “You know me better than that,”
“What's the plan?” she sat closer, much anticipation on her face.
I grabbed the magazine from her hands and quickly opened it to my centerfold. I tapped my fingertip on the page which started the interview, then stood from my chair.
“Happy reading, sis,” I smiled ruffling my fingertips in her hair, she smacked my hand away staring at the first page. I walked to her office door as she intently read the interview. I let myself out.
I didn't look at Maria as I walked out the office door. I swiftly walked by. “Later, Maria,” I felt her eyes on me as I went to turn the corner and walk down the hall towards the elevators.
“Bye... Ethan,” she said hesitantly. It sounded like she was expecting me to talk to her and was shocked to see me walk by without trying to do so. I was unsure as to if she had read my interview. If she had, and confessing my love for her to millions of people around the world didn't trigger a spark, then maybe she doesn't have feelings for me like I had hoped. For now, I am keeping my fingers crossed and am praying that the love God's are on my side. As of right now, It's becoming damn near impossible to live without her.
Chapter Nine
Maria
I stared at the empty space that was filled with Ethan's presence less than ten seconds ago. I could still smell his cologne and my ears were still ringing with the echo from his voice telling me goodbye. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath in. I missed him like crazy, and wished he would have taken a second to talk to me. It is extremely clear that he wants nothing to do with me.
“I see you got the roses,” Marc's deep voice made me jump out of my Ethan induced cologne trance.
“I did,” I smiled, standing from my chair to greet him with a hug. “I needed those, thank you,”
Last night at dinner, I tried not to think about Ethan, but it was so damn hard. Marc was relentlessly asking me what was wrong and that if anything we were friends first. I finally broke the barrier and told him about Ethan and me, the argument that Vanessa and I had after getting caught in the living room with his hands down my pants which earned a hearty laugh from Marc.
He had asked me, “How do you feel about him?”
I froze, opening my mouth only to shut it again as I wasn't ready to say it aloud. It scared me to death just thinking about being in love with Ethan. I was barely able to come to terms with it inside. I have never been in love before and it is completely unfamiliar territory to me.
He said, “Look... love means absolutely nothing until someone comes along and gives it a meaning. Truthfully, Maria, you aren't living until you can learn to let love boomerang. Let love out, and in return let it come back to you,”
“It scares me,” I huffed.
“That's the thing about love, Maria. It'll scare the shit out of you one day, and then the next when the scary part is over you're happier than you have ever been. Then, you try to figure out why you were even scared in the first place,”
He had made sense, a lot actually. Who would have thought that Mr. Sexy Pants was a freaking love guru. The rest of the night was a daze. After dinner we went and had a few drinks. I was quiet most of the time letting his words sink in with every so often he would place a friendly kiss on my cheek letting me know he was still there. He was sweet to send me flowers to help me feel a little bit better about the situation with Ethan. He had offered to go with me to the rehearsal dinner and be my date to the wedding... as friends so I wouldn't go alone. I happily accepted his offer.
“Need a date for lunch?” he winked.
“Absolutely,” I smiled. “Just let me tell Vanessa that I am going to lunch a little early,�
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I stepped into Vanessa's office to find her crying at her desk, intently staring at a magazine. She quickly wiped her eyes with a smile on her face. “Sorry, ugh... stupid eyes are deceiving,” she laughed.
“Are you alright?” I asked from the doorway. “Did something happen?”
“Oh,” she waved her hand, then closed the magazine. “No, what's up?”
“I was hoping to step out to lunch early,” I smiled. “Marc wanted to take me out,”
She stared at me for a moment. “Yeah,” she nodded. “I'll probably be gone when you get back. Ben and I are heading to my moms early and I need to take care of a few things,”