“No visions of a husband and kids roaming through that strange brain of yours?”
“Someday, but it doesn’t seem real just yet. If it’s meant to be, it will.”
Clay threw himself onto the couch, at the other end from where she sat. “What does seem real, kid?”
She didn’t answer for a long time. When she turned to face him, the firelight danced against her flawless skin. With her eyes closed, she whispered, “This seems real, Clay.”
He didn’t know how to respond, so he said nothing. Finally, she came to his rescue. “Got any junk food in this place?”
“Probably, what are you in the mood for?”
“Cheez Doodles, chocolate, and peanut butter.”
“Well, at least you know what you want now.” He rose from the couch, reaching to take her hand, helping her up. “Let’s see what we can find.”
Clay remembered them leaning on the kitchen counter, a bag of cheese puffs open beside them, several chocolate bars opened alongside it. Dana was spreading a thin layer of peanut butter on a square of chocolate when he turned to look. “Dana, sometimes you scare me. I look at you and see this beautiful young woman, but when I look into your eyes, I see something so different. It’s like you’re twenty going on forty. Are you really afraid your career will be over by the time you’re twenty-three?”
“Not afraid. Looking forward to it, I think. It’s not like I won’t still get work, but it will be different. It will be nice to walk down a street, not having heads turn as I go past.”
“Dana, no matter what you do for a living, men will still watch you walk by, most of them probably ready to kill themselves when you don’t give them the favor of a look back.”
“That’s sweet, Clay, but I’m not fishing for compliments. I understand what I’m up against. I’ve tried to be very careful with my choices. With a little luck, I’ll turn into a wonderful spokesperson for some worthy cause.”
“What’s your cause going to be? The homeless, wetland preservation, or prevention of cruelty to animals?”
Dana hedged, turning away from him. “I’m not sure yet.”
Clay turned her face to his with his hand on her chin, looking directly into her brown eyes. “Yes, you do, but you’re not ready to share it, yet.”
“That transparent?”
“Only to me, kid.”
Dana went about cleaning up the mess they had created, and then dropped in front of the fire once again. They listened to the radio. Reports changed often. Dana and Clay both joked about them not really knowing anything, except that it was raining. She stretched again, turning to watch the flames.
“Clay, did you ever want something, then when you got it…”
“Not quite sure what to do with it?”
“Yes, no. It’s like coming home this week, all I wanted was to be home, but once I got here—” She stifled a yawn. “Like tonight.”
Clay stiffened against the back of the couch, almost afraid of what she would say next. Had she read something in his manner, he wondered.
“I’ve been missing Aunt Mary and Uncle Leo for a while, but an hour after I got there I was wishing I could leave.” Her laugh saddened him.
“Be careful what you wish for, something like that?”
“I suppose so.” He watched as she braided her hair quickly, leaving the ends free. He knew from years of watching her, it was something to do with her hands. The weight of it wouldn’t allow the braid to stay unless she banded the end. “They’re always a lot more fun to be around in my mind than in reality.”
“Welcome to the real world, kid.” For a long time they were quiet, watching the fire. “Dana, maybe you’ve been out in the real world for too long.”
“Maybe, but I shouldn’t complain about the advantages I’ve had.” Her mood darkened, and he didn’t know why or if he should question her about it. He only knew for sure he couldn’t offer her physical comfort. The possibilities boggled his mind, and his tightening jeans reminded him of how badly he wanted to comfort her.
“Maybe you should go to bed, Dana. Take your choice of rooms.” Without opening her eyes, she gave him a strange smile. “Take the flashlight up with you.”
“Can I sleep in yours?”
“Any place you want.” Dana stood, reaching a hand to him. “I’m gonna stay up a while longer, I want to listen to the reports. I have to figure out where to start in the morning.”
Slowly, she lowered herself to him, kissing his cheek lightly. “Night, Clay.”
“Night.” She had gotten a few steps away when he called after her, “Dana.”
Halting in her steps, she turned slowly, standing in the doorway. “Whatever it is, kid, just give it some time. Don’t make any snap decisions. Anything worth doing can usually wait a day or two. Think it through, sweetheart.” He hadn’t been prepared for her answer.
“You haven’t called me sweetheart since the day I broke my arm. Holly used to call your mother that.” They shared a smoldering look, Clay the first to look away. “Clay, what specific topic are you advising me to think through?”
“Any that it fits, Dana.”
She stood for a long time, leaning against the doorframe, her hands clasped behind her back. When he said nothing further, she turned and left. He heard her overhead heading to the master bedroom. Then her steps changed and he knew she’d headed to the other end of the house, using the room he had slept in as a child. Clay groaned when he realized she chose to sleep in his old room.
Clay waited an hour then went up to check on her. He walked to the master bedroom, not surprised when it was empty. Turning in the darkness, the door to his old room was open. Standing in the doorway, the sight of her took his breath away. She had pulled the spread down to the foot of the bed. Her jeans were tossed over the back of a chair. Lying on her side on top of the cool sheets, she slept peacefully, his old leather bomber jacket clutched to her chest. Her bottom leg was straight, her top leg bent at the knee. Clay stood for a long time, watching her sleep. The shirt she wore was caught up under her. Little, white, cotton bikini underwear covered her bottom. Her flat stomach and long, toned legs showed the hard work she put in, keeping her body fit.
Turning to leave before he crawled in next to her, he stopped and pulled the spread up over her. She didn’t move in her sleep, he didn’t dare move the lock of hair that had fallen across her face.
Clay remembered that night as if it had been yesterday. He remembered the feelings of confusion he had, first at his attraction, and secondly that she seemed so resigned to having her career end in such a short time. He remembered waking to the thunder and lightning storm overhead, seeing Dana standing in the living room doorway, in just her T-shirt and white panties, her jeans still off. Clay felt the lump in his throat form once again. It did every time he remembered her image. She was so sexy standing there, mussed from sleep. The innocent part of her really didn’t understand what she was doing to him. At the time, Clay simply put out his arm. She closed the distance between them in a few long steps, crawling beside him on the sofa, her head against his chest. He let his arms close around her, even though he knew it was trouble. He had sense enough to pull an old cotton throw off the back of the couch, covering her with it. Forcing himself, he placed his hands on the outside of the blanket, holding her as she drifted back to sleep.
“Dana, I’m only a phone call away.”
“I know, Clay.”
He caught his breath as she tucked herself tighter against his warm body. “Just remember it, okay?” She had only nodded against his chest, her breathing even and calm.
Regardless of the storm, Clay drifted off to sleep with Dana in his arms. He was having the most erotic dream, but when he shifted he realized it wasn’t a dream at all. Dana wasn’t next to him, she was on the floor between his legs. Sometime in his sleep, she’d woken and, whatever her reason was, managed to undo his pants without waking him. She had his cock between her lips when she glanced up at him.
Ins
tinct had him starting to pull away from her but her hands on his hips held him in place. “Dana, you shouldn’t, we shouldn’t…Jeff will kill me.”
“Let’s not tell him then.” She’d engulfed his cockhead and swirled her tongue around it before taking him deeper down her throat in small increments. Clay knew he should stop this, but it felt too damn good. He dropped his head back against the sofa and pretended to shut his eyes while watching her from under his lashes. Christ, she was amazing. At a glance, she was angelic, but sucking his cock down her throat she was anything but. At that moment he realized how adult she truly was. And he figured his wasn’t the first cock she’d sucked, not with the technique she was using on him.
Between sucking, swirling her tongue around him, and occasionally letting her teeth tease his erection, he was close to losing his load. Her fingers grasped the base of him, and she pulled her mouth from him. Using her other hand she continued to stroke him. “You’re close to coming. I can taste you. Where do you want to come, in me or on me?” Her head dropped and took another few licks of his cockhead.
“Dana, we can’t have sex, can’t make love.” He was starting to pull from her grasp, but she dropped her mouth over him, her teeth reminding him she was in charge.
“I’d really like you to fuck me, but it seems you’re not interested. Maybe another time,” she mused and left him alone, pulling backward. For an instant, Clay was beyond disappointed. Then he realized she was tugging her T-shirt off, over her head, and tossing it to the floor. Immediately she sucked him back between her lips. “Come for me, Clay,” she whispered, using her hands and lips to torture his erection. “If you come on my breasts will you lick them clean?”
Clay had been speechless, staring at her. In seconds the choice was made. He watched Dana lean forward and, using her hand, pump his cock only a few times until he came on her breasts. Breasts he’d longed to see, longed to touch. Dana took him back to her lips and licked him clean, making him stiffen a second time in the process.
He didn’t care any longer what was right or wrong. Clay wrapped his hands around her waist and lifted her to the sofa, laying her down, and following over her. His lips captured her nipple and he sucked it. His hands closed around each breast, feeling her size and weight, playing with her skin as he went from side to side, licking his cum from her tits.
Dana lifted her hand and pressed it to his neck, holding him tight to her. “Harder, Clay, suck it harder.”
“I don’t want to hurt you,” he mumbled around her nipple.
“Hurt me, please. Don’t make me beg, just make me come.”
Clay took more of her breast between his lips, his fingers tightening around it, and let his other hand drop between them. He rubbed her clit through her panties and slid his finger along the length of her pussy lips. The material was moist, and he knew she was responding, writhing under his touch.
In an act of total abandon, he let his finger slide under the elastic band and pulled them aside. He was right, his finger stroked along her pussy, hot and wet to his touch. She was jutting her hips upward to meet his finger, her hand coming to cover his, moving him slightly until his index finger slipped in her pussy. She groaned and shifted under him, her hand still holding his wrist tight to her. “Clay, use another finger and bite my tit, you’ll make me come.”
He didn’t hesitate until she ran her fingers through his hair, tugging him to look at her. “Are you sure you won’t fuck me? I always figured you had a large cock, but you’re huge, long, and thick. I like the way you taste. Come fuck me, Clay, please?”
“I don’t have any protection, Dana.” She let her head drop back to the sofa but kept her hand pressed against his wrist. “Use your fingers on me, Clay, bite my nipples, make me come.”
“Dana, you’ve got me ready to come again myself.”
She stilled under him, and he thought she had changed her mind and wanted to stop. Pulling back, he was confused until she pushed her panties down her legs and off. Then she lay back, reaching to him. Clay leaned forward and kissed her, thrusting his tongue between her lips, sharing his cum with her. He didn’t need her prompting to replace his finger in her pussy, gliding a second beside it before sucking her nipple between his lips. He bit lightly and pushed his fingers deeper.
Dana growled at him, and he felt her body grasping at his fingers, her orgasm apparent. Clay left his fingers in her but managed to edge up next to her. He grabbed his cock and with a few strokes, came a second time, his cum landing on her pussy and thighs. There was no hesitation. He shifted his body until he was between her legs and licked his cum from her clit and pussy. He continued to use his fingers to thrust inside her, punctuating his movements to her clit. Dana grabbed at his head and held him tight to her pussy. He felt her body quake and knew she’d come a second time.
He continued to lick her but slowed his movements, still sliding his fingers in her pussy until he felt her completely relax under him. Clay dropped his head to her thigh and waited for all hell to break loose. He was afraid to speak, but he gently let his fingers drop from her body.
“Don’t go yet,” she protested. Clay wrapped his arms around her hips and held her tight, his head only inches from her pussy. He didn’t remember them moving, remembered them dozing off to sleep, his last memory of her scent and the taste of her on his lips.
She had untangled herself from him early the next morning. He’d grasped her tighter to him, and she’d stayed with him a while longer. He had listened to her upstairs and assumed she was getting dressed. Clay had feigned sleep when she came to him, kissing his lips lightly with hers before she left. He’d wanted to follow her and call her back. Wanted to take her upstairs to his bed and truly make love to her. Instead, he waited until he heard the kitchen door squeak to move. He was about to get up, but let himself relax back on the sofa, reliving last night. When he finally moved a second time, he realized the blanket he had covered her with was draped over his legs. He was half-lying on the sofa, his pants around his ankles. He knew she left before daybreak, because the sun was just starting to show through the clouds. He couldn’t say goodbye, was afraid of what he might say or do.
After hearing her truck start, he clambered to his feet, pulling up his pants and making it to the kitchen window in time to watch the truck pull out of his driveway. Clay had stood at the kitchen window for a long time that morning, knowing he could be in deep trouble.
When she was gone he went upstairs to his old room and lay on the bed where the linens still held her scent. He noted his jacket was hung on the back of the straight-backed desk chair. Clay took another deep breath and let his hand drop to his cock. At first, it was just to relieve the ache she created within him. After a few tugs, he paused, undid his pants and pushed them down his hips. His cock sprang free, standing tall and harder than usual. Grasping it firmly, he pumped it back and forth until he came on his belly. Clay let himself drift back to sleep, his hand still grasping his cock. When he woke, his hand and crotch were sticky from his release, reinforcing this hadn’t been a dream. He justified that she’d turned their evening to sex, but he hadn’t stopped it. And he kept reinforcing to himself that she was a woman now, not a kid that was off-limits. He knew if he’d had condoms in his wallet their night would have taken a different turn. He would have fucked her for all he was worth, not knowing if he’d ever get a chance to touch her intimately again. He appeased his conscience by deciding what they shared was more than he’d first considered. They had been intimate, they just hadn’t completed the act. Now if he could just wipe the smile from his lips. In the shower his cock got hard, and he resisted jerking off. Tonight would come soon enough, and he wanted to relive how she swallowed him, how she milked him with her throat, how her voice sounded when she begged him to make her come.
“I’m in deep trouble,” he said, knowing if Jeff ever found out there’d be trouble, probably including pounding fists and possibly broken bones. Clay didn’t care. He’d finally gotten to suck her raspbe
rry nipples, licking his cum from them. And he now knew how tight her pussy was.
He made it through the day with a strange smile on his lips and a slight lift in his walk. He made a point of not leaving the property and letting his cell phone go to voice mail, checking each call to make sure it wasn’t Dana. The next time he talked to Jeff, he was told Dana had gone back to Manhattan.
Clay decided that was for the best. If she stayed he would become emotionally attached, something he wasn’t sure she was ready for. Again he wondered who she’d slept with, what other man’s cock she’d sucked, and forced away the questions. He was no shrinking virgin, and apparently neither was Dana.
It had been three years later when they were alone again at Jeff and Lisa’s wedding, and he’d taken full advantage of the time. It would take another three years before Dana moved home permanently. Clay wouldn’t allow himself to think about who she slept with while they were apart. For a time, he laid any woman who would smile at him, but he soon realized they were all hollow lays. He was looking for a surrogate for Dana, and that wasn’t fair to the women or to him. Finally, he just gave up searching for a woman who reminded him of Dana. His self-imposed celibacy had cleared his mind and his conscience.
Chapter Five
Sunday brunch turned out to be informative for Clay. On the back patio a large umbrella covered their table, shading them from the intense sun. Sitting back, he listened to Dana talk about her plans for the future. She had it all worked out in her mind, he realized.
“The architect I hired gave the structure a great report except for the roof. That seems to be another story.”
“Do you really trust this guy’s opinion?” Jeff asked her.
“Why not? He knew up front he wouldn’t get the job. It was why I chose him. I paid him for his valued opinion, not what he thought he could talk me into. Besides, I wanted to have an idea of the problems before I started talking to anyone local. It can’t hurt when I go before the planning board to have an outside, unbiased opinion.”
Payne, Lillith - His Unconventional Woman (Siren Publishing Classic) Page 5