“What?” Haley squawked. “Did one of those cowboys call you a slut? Which one? Because I will come out there and personally remove his scrotum. I’m buying a knife online right now.”
“Calm down,” I said, laughing. “It wasn’t them. It was the housekeeper.” I quickly filled her in on the latest events, ending with Sawyer climbing into the loft with me. “It was my very first close encounter with a real penis,” I squealed.
Haley made an announcer impression with her voice. “Next week on Close Encounters with the Penile Kind…”
We both dissolved into laughter. Sometimes, I thought I could live on the ranch with the guys. But then I’d talk to Haley and realize how painfully I missed her. New York was fun and all, but I was kind of done with it. After realizing how stressful it had been living in New York, always under watch by my parents’ campaign advisors, always getting photographed doing something I shouldn’t be doing…well, I’d started to think Wyoming fit me a little better. I could do without everything in New York—except my best friend.
“Seriously, though,” Haley said. “I think the question we all want to know is…which one are you going to fuck first?”
“I don’t know,” I wailed, throwing myself deep into my pillows. “I like them all. I wish I could give my virginity to all of them at once.”
“Well, you can, kind of,” Haley said. “But only one dick fits in there at a time, Amber.”
“There’s more than one place for a dick,” I reminded her.
“Are you seriously contemplating anal for your first time? I mean, you can have one in the back and one in the front, but you’re still only going to get two of them inside you at once.”
“Sawyer popped my throatal cherry,” I said.
“That sounds so wrong,” Haley said. “I hope something didn’t actually pop back there. I mean, maybe he took out a tonsil on his way.”
“Oh God no,” I said. “Forget that deep-throat shit. He’s way too big.”
“By the time you got it all in, he’d be fucking your pancreas,” Haley said. ‘
“Enough about my pancreas,” I said. “Who’s starring in your episodes of Close Encounters of the Penile Kind?”
“No one,” Haley said with a sigh. “I’m still grounded. Mostly I just do charity work.”
“Ugh, I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” she said. “I kinda like it. But you better come back soon or I might join the Peace Corps.”
“Just as long as you don’t turn into a hippie and stop wearing deodorant.”
After we hung up, our conversation lingered at the back of my mind all day. Should I be doing more to help on the ranch? Or had I spent enough of my life doing things for other people? Maybe it was time I just enjoyed myself, let myself do what I wanted for a change.
And I kept thinking about Haley’s question, too. Which one of the guys did I want to be my first? Holden had been the first of the three to kiss me, and the first guy ever to taste me. Did that mean he should be my first? He’d definitely be the most gentle and sensitive to my needs.
But Sawyer had been my first blow job. Did that mean I should give him the real deal, not make him wait? And he could put me at ease and make me comfortable when things started to get awkward much better than the other two.
Waylon hadn’t been the first anything yet. Was it his turn to be first? He had been the only one to give me an orgasm, so that had to count for something. If it was any indication of what was to come, I was in for a whole lot more.
And the truth was, I really didn’t know who I wanted to be first. I wanted them all, and I didn’t want to disappoint anyone. I would just have to relax and go with the moments as they came, like I had with Sawyer. Whoever I had first, I knew it would be amazing.
4
Sawyer
I should’ve known Mrs. Grimes would go stirring up trouble in town. The very day she packed up her cabin and took off, a familiar gold Caddy pulled up in the drive. This time, I spotted it from the field. I turned Picasso towards the house and dug my heals into his sides, urging him to head back early. After the last time, I didn’t trust Ma alone with Amber.
Amber must have been out back, though, because Ma was in the house on her own when I got there. I stomped the snow off my boots on the welcome mat while Ma fussed over me. “Hasn’t that girl been feeding you?” she asked. “You look half starved. What’s she here for if she’s not going to take care of you proper?”
“She’s not here to cook for us,” I said, pulling off my boots and setting them by the fire.
“Then what is she doing here?” Ma asked, regarding me with her shrewd eyes. We never could get anything past her.
“You know why she’s here,” I said, pulling out a chair from the table and turning it around towards the fire. I sat down and stretched out my legs, letting my toes warm.
“Mmmhmm,” Ma said with a knowing nod of her head, like I’d just confirmed her suspicions. She went to the fridge and opened it up, looking at what food we had. “I’m going to make you a real sandwich. None of that av-o-ca-do nonsense.” She drew out the word like it wasn’t a real thing she was talking about but some made-up food for city slickers.
“I’m fine, Ma,” I said. I wanted to stand up for Amber somehow, even if it was just to show that she was feeding us fine.
“And answer me this,” Ma went on, ignoring me as she set about making a sandwich. “What happens when it comes time for her to go home? You think she’ll stay here one day longer than her mama makes her?”
“I don’t know,” I said, hooking my hands behind my head and tilting my chair back. I wasn’t sure about that. I thought Amber might stay, but it was true that she’d been forced to come here. She might not want to stay out here, where we didn’t have all the things she was used to in the big city.
“You just be careful,” Ma said. “I assume it’s you she’s got her claws into.”
“What?” I asked, sitting up straight, my chair legs crashing down hard on the wood floor. “Why would you say that?”
Ma gave me that knowing smile and set a plate down at the table. I scooted in and picked up the sandwich. I could always eat.
“I’ve got eyes,” Ma said. “I know what I saw the last time I was here. Everyone thinks Holden’s the big baby of the family, but I know you got a soft spot for the pretty girls. Don’t think I forgot what you were like growing up. A girl turned her big blue eyes at you, you were done for.”
I laughed. “Ma, this isn’t a mother-son conversation, but if you want to know, I do happen to like the ladies. That’s got nothing to do with Amber.”
“She’s young,” Ma said. “She might be pretty, but you’ll figure out soon enough that don’t go far. You’re going to want to have a family of your own, and she’s going to want to follow her own dreams.”
I set down my sandwich. “I got a family right here, Ma.”
“I know you love your brothers,” Ma said, sitting across from me and patting my hand. “But don’t you want something of your own?”
My mind filled with a picture of my brother between Amber’s thighs, his tongue opening her virgin pussy. Just watching him make her come had almost made me come. I didn’t think I wanted to give that up, even to have her all to myself. Sure, I wanted to fuck her. My cock was throbbing under the table at the memory of her on her knees, choking on it. But I also wanted to watch my brothers pound into her, see her face when she lost control and screamed for more.
Maybe I was some kind of sicko, but I’d accepted that by now. We’d brought women home to share before, but they were just to satisfy that need in us. Amber was here for more than a night. We weren’t supposed to look at her that way, but how could I help it?
Ma was right about one thing—I liked pretty girls. But I didn’t just want to fuck Amber. I wanted to get to know her. I wanted to know what that dream of hers was, and I wanted to give it to her. And I wanted to see her around the ranch every day, learning about the cows, riding the
horses, walking the paths through the pastures. When spring came around, I wanted to show her the thaw on the creek, the calves, the Wyoming wildflowers. I didn’t want her to leave come New Years.
Damn, I had it bad.
But I wanted us all to be happy in a real, lasting relationship, not one that happened in the dark, fulfilling a secret fantasy of some lonely woman in town. Not one that was never mentioned again, with someone who would turn away and pretend she didn’t see us when she walked by with her new, vanilla husband.
But I didn’t know if we’d get that. I didn’t know if we’d get anything. Amber was young, like Ma said. She had dreams I hadn’t even asked about yet. And she wasn’t ready for one Westling brother, let alone three. She might not be ready before it was time for her to go. Time was running out, and we were just getting started. And I didn’t know if we’d make it through another woman walking out on us.
5
Amber
That night at dinner, Sawyer looked up from his chicken and nodded at me. “I think Ma’s coming around to you,” he said.
“I don’t know about that,” I said. “But I hope so. Seeing as how we’re family and all.”
“Too bad she didn’t get to stay longer,” Holden said.
I’d been quite happy with the hour of her company I’d gotten when I came in from the cabins. But like Sawyer had said, only they got to insult their mother. So I just smiled.
“Maybe you could invite her to your show in town,” Sawyer said, giving his brother a wink to show he was kidding.
“You’ve got a show coming up?” I asked. “Why didn’t you say something?”
“Better not put Amber’s picture in there,” Waylon said.
“I wouldn’t do that,” Holden said, his face going a little red. “I told you, that one’s private.”
“I guess not private enough that your brothers haven’t seen it,” I said.
His face got redder, but he didn’t look up from his plate. “It’s not an art show. I just drop off my stuff, and the gallery sells it.”
“Except the private ones.”
“Aw, now don’t give him a hard time,” Sawyer said, winking at me this time. “I told you we share everything.”
“Well,” I said. “I’d like to share the art show experience with you. Or just go with you to set them up or whatever. If you’ll let me.”
“Really?” Holden asked, giving me a hopeful look.
“Of course,” I said. “I want to be part of your lives.”
“It would mean a lot to me,” Holden said.
I appreciated how honest he was with me, not hiding his feelings or playing games. I had to say that was one thing Wyoming men had over New York men. Along with manners and lots of other things, not to mention the work-hardened bodies that didn’t need to spend hours lifting weights in front of a mirror.
“Speaking of being part of each other’s lives,” Sawyer said, his face going serious for once. “I don’t want to put pressure on you, Amber, but have you given any thought to what you’re going to do come December?”
“It’s not far off,” Holden said. “Thanksgiving’s coming up next week.”
“But I’m not leaving until the end of December,” I reminded them. I couldn’t believe the time had passed so fast. I still felt like I didn’t know Waylon at all some days, and I hadn’t fully gotten to know Holden, either. Other days, I felt pretty close to them all, but I had to remind myself it had only been six weeks. I still had half my time left.
Waylon stood up from the table abruptly, took his plate, and went to the sink to wash up. I shot Sawyer a look, but he gave a dismissive shrug with one shoulder. “Ma was asking some questions about you,” he said. “It dawned on me I didn’t even know the answers to them.”
“What’d she want to know?” I asked. “Besides if I was scheming to take the ranch from her sons.”
“Nothing like that,” Sawyer said. “She wanted to know what your, uh, career goals were.”
I laughed, then stopped myself. “I’m eighteen,” I reminded them. “I don’t know what I want to be yet. I just graduated last spring, and I’m not really the college type. Maybe I’ll go one day, or take some online courses. But I know if I went now, I’d fall into some bad habits.”
“Like what?” Holden asked, a hint of jealousy in his voice.
“Like, I don’t know, partying and drinking,” I said. “And yeah, now that I’m not dating a walking chastity belt, I’d probably end up making some bad decisions when it came to men.”
“I’m not liking the sound of that,” Sawyer said.
“Well, I didn’t say I wanted to do that,” I said. “But I figured it’s pretty inevitable. Like a rite of passage. You gotta kiss a lot of frogs and all that.”
“You haven’t kissed enough frogs yet?” Sawyer asked.
“I’ve kissed a couple frogs,” I admitted. “But besides Charlie, I’ve never really dated anyone. I mean, there was a guy before him, but I’m ninety percent sure he was gay and only went out with me because his parents forced him to. And then there was this one night in the middle, but let’s not talk about him just now.”
Waylon leaned against the counter and crossed his gorgeous arms over his chest, a frown creasing his brow.
“One night?” Sawyer asked. “I thought you were a virgin.”
“Oh, I am,” I said. “But after the first guy broke up with me, I was feeling particularly shitty, so I got really wasted at a party and decided I was going to hook up with a random guy to get it over with. And since I was fifteen, I proceeded to tell pretty much everyone at the party my goal for the night.”
“I take it someone took you up on that?” Sawyer asked, his hands balling into fists. “When you were drunk?”
“Well, my best friend’s brother was a couple years older, and I had a stupid crush on him because I didn’t realize he was devoid of a soul and, you know, common decency. So he helpfully volunteered to relieve me of my burden. He took me off to a bedroom, but apparently I passed out before anything could happen. And I guess he had a shred of decency, because he didn’t do anything.”
The tension in the room eased, but I couldn’t seem to shut up. “I told you nothing happened. And I’m sure you really didn’t want to know all that. Anyway, the guy did tell everyone at school that we hooked up, and I actually thought we might have, even though, you know, nothing felt different physically. But later he admitted that nothing happened. I kinda got a reputation after that party, and my mom put a stop to that by setting me up with Charlie. And you know all about him.”
“And after all that you’re still eager to make more mistakes with men?” Holden asked, looking at me doubtfully.
“Well, I’m not eager to,” I said. “I’m just saying, I don’t always make stellar decisions when it comes to men. I know myself well enough to know that’s the direction I’d be headed. To tell you the truth, Mom was right about this. Coming out here was probably the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’m not looking forward to having it end.”
“You could stay,” Holden said, looking at his plate.
The words hung in the air. I’d wanted to stay, had thought about it. But no one had voiced it quite so plainly before. But to tell the truth, they’d probably all been thinking it. They’d propositioned me not for a wild, one-night orgy, but for a relationship. That probably didn’t mean six weeks in their eyes.
“Let’s just see how the next six weeks go,” Waylon said, turning back to the sink. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”
I tried not to let that comment sting. Did he want me to go already?
“Exactly,” I said, trying to sound bright. “Like a trial period.”
“If you’re going to be with us, we’ll need to train you a little, anyway,” Waylon said.
“Train me?” I asked. “I’m not a dog.”
“No,” he said. “You’re a virgin. And a virgin can’t handle what we’re going to do to you.”
My pussy
squeezed at the thought of what that entailed. For that matter, I was pretty sure this training period was going to be plenty exciting, too. I figured he was probably right about needing to prepare me. I’d seen two of their cocks already, and trust me when I say my finger vibe had not prepared me one tiny bit for either of them.
6
Amber
Lidia insisted we all come over to her place for Thanksgiving, and I managed to not make a fool of myself a single time. I even made her laugh once. Back home, there was lots to do around the ranch, and I didn’t feel like I was just crashing there without pulling my weight anymore. I was as busy as my boys, between getting the cabins ready, tending the horses, and trying to get all the paperwork together.
Waylon took me into the office in the lodge, although he seemed a bit reluctant as he pulled out an old-fashioned ledger book. “This is where we keep all the ranch numbers,” he said. “Money in, money out, how many head of cattle we got, all that.”
“What’s a head of cattle?” I asked, imagining something grisly. You know, like cow heads on stakes. It made sense to me, but Waylon just shot me an incredulous look.
“It’s how many cows we got.”
“Oh,” I said. “Well, you could’ve said that.”
“I did,” he said, turning to a filing cabinet while I fanned the pages.
“This doesn’t look too bad,” I said.
Waylon stepped back from the filing cabinet and gestured inside. There, about a hundred of the thin black books sat gathering dust. I gulped.
“Cody didn’t believe in keeping records on a computer,” Waylon said, his frown fierce at the mention of his no-good brother who’d run off with Waylon’s fiancé. I’d never heard his name spoken before, and I felt like Waylon was finally letting me in a little if he’d tell me that much.
“And since then?” I asked. “Surely one of you has been keeping a tally on things.”
“Of course we have,” he said, glowering. “Just didn’t see a reason to change things. It was easier just to keep using the books he used.”
Ride Me, Cowboys_A Reverse Harem Forbidden Romance Page 2