Defiant Destiny

by Madison Cumbee

  “The archangel did not move… In the end, Shamsiêl was destroyed and my mother could barely lift her head as she clung to the newly-made bastard child.”

  I flinched.

  But he went on, without pause. “She could not speak loudly, but the archangel heard her without difficulty as he examined her fatal state. She asked what the name was of her savior. When she was told, my mother told him that she wanted her son to be named in his honor and that… she asked for me to be taken care of.

  “It was her dying wish, and the archangel abided by it… And so I was raised by a member of the Hierarchy. It wasn’t until years later that he told me what I just told you. You see, he had been watching Shamsiêl the entire time because… they were brothers… and he wanted to save his brother but couldn’t and instead broke the laws and saved me.”

  My gaze lifted to meet Uriel’s; I had unknowingly dropped my eyes to the floor during his explication as his pained history was slowly revealed to me. I had always suspected there was darkness in his past because several times throughout the months we’d spent together, I would find him with a distant, haunted look in his blue-gray eyes. He hadn’t ever liked to talk about his past; instead he preferred to plan for the next date he wanted to take me on.

  “Your uncle?” I asked.

  “Yes. My uncle, URIEL, what you would call an archangel or something of its equivalence, a member of the Hierarchy, destroyed my father, rescued me, and raised me- along with Zev and Dagan after he found them scraping for food after their mothers had died in one of the villages we were passing through several years later. And then when the three of us decided to work together with Azra and Odeda, my uncle ultimately watched over them too.”

  “Wow,” was all I could manage.

  Uriel nodded.

  “And he is…” I attempted to piece everything together.

  “The visitor you will be meeting in a matter of hours,” Uriel helpfully finished for me.

  “Okay.” I could handle that. Meeting one more member of Uriel’s family, and this time a close blood relative, wasn’t that frightening. I mean, if my angel was his nephew then how bad could he be? “But how could your uncle keep us apart forever?”

  “He’ll do whatever he thinks is best- best for everyone. The Hierarchy looks at a situation and acts on whatever they believe is for the greater good… And immortals having relations with mortals hasn’t been good in the past.”

  “Oh.” So that was the problem. “But the Hierarchy is the good guys, right?”

  “Yes.”

  “And your father wasn’t one of them, unlike his brother. He wasn’t good.” I thought back to what Uriel had just told me. “He was going to…” I couldn’t force the words from my lips.

  “He was going to kill my mother and bring me up as his own dark price,” Uriel answered. “That’s what I was telling you on Thursday. There is always a thin line between doing what is right and what is wrong in every situation, no matter if you’re mortal or immortal. But for Nephilim, it is more critical that we always select good because we have a much greater potential for harming others by choosing evil. Usually, once the decision is made, it becomes easier for Nephilim to do good; after years and years of practicing a righteous path, the way gets more manageable and straightforward.

  “Nephilim have evil in us; it’s in our blood… I chose good,” Uriel’s voice was assuring, like I had to be convinced of the fact. His expression was searching mine, frantic to know that I understood.

  I stood then and stepped the few feet between us. I clasped his face in my hands and told him confidently, “I know you did. You are good; I’ve never doubted that.”

  Uriel covered my hands with his and brought them closer to kiss each one before he lowered them to our sides. “You never doubted I was good?” He asked softly, vulnerably.

  “No. Never.”

  He averted his eyes from mine. “I did. That line between right and wrong is meant to get stronger and thicker with age and abstinence from evil… But for the last century, everything was starting to get to me… That line was getting more fragile instead of resilient.” He didn’t seem to want to go on, but I squeezed his hands lightly. Those stormy eyes that I would know anywhere forever gazed down into mine intently. “Can I tell you something?” he asked hesitantly.

  I had Uriel’s trust and his faith. I knew I couldn’t ever let him down or else he might never open up to anyone outside of the guild again. “Anything.”

  My angel drew a deep breath and his eyes filled with so much emotion that I wasn’t sure how they were holding it all in.

  “I was suffocating,” he stated. “The same routine of moving from one city after completing a mission to another city just to start all over again but essentially doing the same thing year after year was weighing on my spirit. I know that the guild helps people; I get that; I do- but… I was beginning to loathe being immortal. You cannot imagine what it’s like to live among beings that aren’t what you are, not even the same species as half of you. It’s like there was always this border with my kind on one side and your kind on the other, and before you, I had never dreamed of crossing that border.

  “Mortals have always been fascinated with my kind whenever one would get a glimpse of us from across the border, and I couldn’t understand why. Things like the Fountain of Youth and the Tree of Life have been whispered about through the years. Humans wouldn’t be so wishful to give up their mortality if they understood how lucky they are to die naturally.

  “I know it’s an odd thing to say- something in the favor of death- but when people have less time to live, it makes every moment precious. After millennia of never aging, never getting closer to dying, I started wondering what the point was. I began to feel like I was suffocating. What was I living for? Would every day, for the rest of eternity, be a broken record that kept repeating the same note over and over again until I couldn’t stand it anymore? Would I forever be running from my father’s shadow that always seemed to be threatening to come out through my own? I was suffocating under a self-imposed depression. I was beginning to doubt my code and think of other… alternative ways of living. But then I saw you… and this little piece of who I used to be came back. When I first heard you speak to me- you simply asked me to join you for lunch- it was like coming up for air. The more time I spent with you, the more pieces of my broken soul returned and the easier it was for me to breathe on my own… You gave me a future I could look forward to happily. You were my light in what was becoming a very dark world. And I don’t know what perchance I could have done to deserve a possible future with you.”

  Uriel gently wiped a tear from my cheek that I hadn’t realized had fallen. I never used to cry. “I gave you a future?” I sniffed.

  “You did,” he whispered fiercely.

  “That’s strange,” I laughed through my last tear. “Because you gave me a present.” And so I told him; I told Uriel how before him I dreaded every day and only ever looked forward to the far future, how I had felt like I was going through life without really experiencing it, how he made every second better just by being present, how that night on the mountain had ruined me forever- now I could never love another, and I was okay with that as long as I had him.

  It was somewhere around this point that Uriel dropped my hands to wrap his arms around me in an embrace that was becoming so wonderfully familiar that I can’t describe the full extent of the safety, happiness, love, and promise I felt in his touch.

  But I still had so much I could tell him about how he set my world on fire. “I can’t believe I found someone who can look at me and go, ‘Yeah, you’ve got Mother issues and yeah, you can sometimes be a bit of a spoiled rich kid and yeah, sometimes you yell and act somewhat psychotic, but I love you anyway and I can deal with all the problems that make up you.’” And when he opened his mouth, before he could sweetly disagree with these points, I went on. “And even this, this simple act of affection, you holding me now, makes me feel more content th
an I have ever felt. I used to think I would have to wait for happiness. I didn’t think it possible in high school.”

  Uriel laughed softly, musically.

  “Mmm. How do you do that?”

  “Do what?” Uriel quietly asked with a grin that made my heart ache as he pulled me closer and I rested my head against his shoulder.

  “Instantly make me feel all warm and… tingly.”

  “Perhaps you’re feeling a reflection of the sensations I am experiencing.”

  “What I was trying to say before I was magnificently distracted,” I smiled, “is that without you, I’d still be waiting for happiness. You gave me a present- and a delighted one at that.” I shrugged against him.

  He was silent for a moment. “… And what about our pasts?” Uriel asked as I felt him stiffen.

  “I don’t really have a past,” I said slowly. “Not before you. So… you don’t need to have a past either- if you want.”

  “You’re really impervious to the knowledge of the feeble line between good and evil that I’ve been meandering around recently?”

  “Well, you said it gets easier when I’m here, right?”

  His body relaxed some. “Infinitely easier.”

  “Then, I’ve got a simple solution,” I repeated what he’d said about not falling asleep again on a date, and then I gave my own answer. “I’ll always be with you.” And when he didn’t say anything, I went on instead of chancing a look at his expression. “I’ll do it for your sake, that is; as I’ve just told you, my life would be completely the same if we weren’t together. Nothing’s changed between before you entered it and now.”

  “Right, that’s exactly what you said before. It’s practically verbatim.” Uriel said sarcastically.

  Hearing his joking words, I looked up at my angel.

  Smooth, glowing skin, those compellingly beautiful and expressive blue-grey eyes, youthful, gorgeous blond curls, and a smile meant just for me were what I saw and all that I wanted to see gazing down at me. “Nothing’s changed at all,” I lied unconvincingly.

  “Nothing?” he asked. “So that means you had guys throwing you on their beds and then tickling you until you cried out uncle before you knew me?”

  “What?”

  Uriel smiled mischievously as he scooped me up and tossed me lightly onto his bed. Before I could sit up and repeat my one-word question, he was perched on the bed beside me and was tickling me in the one and only spot that I was ticklish- the spot that had taken him a dozen weeks to discover- the sides of my waist.

  I refused to say uncle no matter how difficult it was for me to breathe through my peals of laughter.

  And it was in this state that Odeda found us when she opened the door to look in and say, “Are humans being tortured in our house again?”

  “If this is torture then I’ll gladly relinquish my freedom and volunteer to be a prisoner,” I said once Uriel stopped diverting my attention from her. He now sat upright in front of my stomach while I was still strung across the surface of his comforter.

  “Would the cheerful inmate like some gruel now or later?” Odeda flashed her perfect smile. Now that there was no tension in the atmosphere, I surveyed her appearance for the first time that day. The woman of the guild was effortlessly stunning in a pair of white pants and a pearly blue ruffled short sleeved blouse with her smooth and sheer golden hair pulled up in a neat ponytail. Was I underdressed or was Odeda just being Odeda in her fashionable attire? Uriel has on jeans, I reminded myself.

  “Food. Right.” I came out of my admiring stare. “Are we not waiting to eat with-”

  “He doesn’t eat,” Odeda informed me.

  I paused for a second. Of course he doesn’t because eating would be too ordinary. What mythical creature needs sustenance? Whatever was I thinking? “How about I help you cook for the human and half-humans then? Give me something to do while I wait impatiently for our important visitor.”

  “Did you explain fully about URIEL?” she asked my Uriel.

  “I did- and she’s still here. Can you believe it?”

  “Of course she’s still here,” Odeda replied, lifting one shoulder in a half shrug. “Even if you did screw up your relationship, Keira’d still come around just to see me, isn’t that right, Keira?”

  “Absolutely. Girl power, baby. Who needs soul mates anyway?”

  “That’s my girl,” Odeda smiled. “And don’t worry about our visitor; I’ll put in a good word for ya.” She was telling me not to worry, but she, along with the others, had been nervous earlier. Was she just trying to comfort me? If that were the case, then it was working; at that moment, I wasn’t anxious at all. “I’ll be waiting downstairs when you’re ready.” And then she skipped out of the room.

  ‘“Who needs soul mates anyway?’” Uriel repeated my question incredulously as he turned his head to look down at me.

  “I’m sorry- you thought you were indispensible?”

  Uriel fell backward on top of me, squishing my stomach with his torso. “I’m not moving until you take that back.” He crossed his arms over his chest in a stubborn stance.

  “I can live with that,” I said as I tried to bend in a way that would bring our faces closer together but found that I couldn’t. I was stuck. I groaned, accepting solitary defeat. “Odeda!” I called loudly enough for a human to hear me from down the hall, so I assumed she could hear me from wherever she was in the house.

  She appeared in the doorway again, her gleaming ponytail gracefully landing over her shoulder as it caught up with her. “Yes?”

  I propped myself up on my elbows so I could address the man pinning my midsection down. “Do I have to get your sister to move you or are you going to do it yourself?”

  Odeda smiled as she understood why I’d called her back. “Is he giving you trouble, Keira?” she asked as she took a step into the room.

  “I could take her,” Uriel told me in a sure and undaunted tone.

  “No you couldn’t,” both of us girls told him.

  “Fine,” he sighed and sat up, freeing me.

  I sprung up to my feet, feeling lighter and more untroubled than I had when I’d entered his bedroom. “Come help us make a late lunch,” I offered.

  Uriel eyed his sister without answering me.

  Odeda rolled her baby-blues. “You can help if you swear to take responsibility for burning the house down- or burning the food, for that matter.”

  “She doesn’t usually let us men assist in the kitchen,” Uriel explained to me.

  “Does that mean you can’t cook?” I challenged.

  “Oh, I can cook very well. I just never get to practice, isn’t that right Odeda?”

  “If you want to help then help, just don’t get in my way,” she commanded as she strode over and took my hand. “We’ll be in the kitchen.”

  I glanced over my shoulder and waved for Uriel to follow as Odeda led me out of his room. “I heard you were Lady Guinevere,” I told her as we walked down the stairs together. “What was that time period like?”

  “Dirty, very dirty,” she said with an unappreciative shudder. “Women could only wear dresses. Can you imagine wearing a dress all the time? And riding side-saddle- don’t even get me started.”

  “Okay, then.” Maybe I didn’t wish I could travel back in time to see what the Middle Ages were like. I couldn’t imagine loosing the freedom today’s world rightfully allowed the fairer sex.

  We came down into the living room where Dagan was sitting on the floor playing a videogame- shocker- and Azra was stretched on the couch reading a really lengthy book laying on his chest as he stared at the ceiling with his usual perplexed expression on his face. “Where’s Zev?” I asked.

  “Checking with his furry friends for any updates,” Dagan instantly replied without taking his eyes from the television where he was slaying some zombies.

  “Updates on Elly?”

  “Yep. Hopefully we’ll know more when he gets back.” Dagan reached the next level and smiled,
happy with himself. I didn’t take his lack of obvious interest personally; I knew almost nothing can distract the smallest male of the guild from his toys.

  “Keira and I are going to make an early super. Are you two hungry?” Odeda asked them.

  “Starved,” Dagan exclaimed.

  Azra nodded, picked up his book, and turned one of his pages.

  “Kay. Give us half an hour or so.”

  Odeda and I walked to their fully-stocked kitchen that I had become familiar with. She immediately donned her apron, handed me one she had bought for me a month earlier, and set me to work on opening some tomato sauce cans. She seemed to feel the need to justify that since it was sold in a store, she saw no reason not to take advantage of not having to make every ingredient from scratch. We were making spaghetti and it was faster and just as good using pre-made sauce as using her own recipe. I just smiled and nodded since I had no room to reprimand anyone on their cooking methods.

  Once I was done taking the lids off, I went directly to the cabinet that held the proper straining pot for the noodles while Odeda used my sauce for the next step. “Very good, Keira,” Odeda complemented my knowing what to do with the noodles. “You did that all on your own.”

  “Yeah, between you and Jerry, I’m actually learning a few things in the kitchen.”

  “Jerry’s your family’s personal chef, right?”

  “Yep.”

  “That’s another thing that’s so different in this time- it used to be that the woman of the house was responsible for doing the preparation of food. A man wouldn’t touch a cooking utensil… What’s so funny?”

  I had started laughing after her first sentence. “I’m just imagining my mother in an apron, sweating over an open stove.” I was still laughing when Uriel walked into the kitchen.

  “What has Keira found that’s so hysterical?”

  “She said something about picturing her mom in an apron…?” Odeda tried to explain.

  Uriel smiled and chuckled a bit with me. He understood the unintended humor; now that he’d met Mother, my boyfriend could appreciate such quips with me.