Sera’s wrath-born bravado wilted like radicchio over a high flame. Wow. It’s like we’re not even the same species, she thought. And then the woman rose to greet her, and Sera realized that wasn’t quite true. They had one thing in common.
They’d both bedded Blake Austin.
True, the last time they’d met, the blonde had had her mouth full, but Sera couldn’t fail to recognize the woman who’d sent her off on her final bender. Add one of my old chef’s hats and put her on her knees, and… yup, that’s the chick that was blowing Blake right before he blew my career to shreds.
Sera’s heart sank as the woman shed her entourage and drifted over to greet them, her walk willowy as a finishing school graduate’s. By contrast, Sera felt like some uncouth barbarian. A short, uncouth barbarian.
Of all the hostesses on all the reality cable shows, why did it have to be her?
“Let me introduce a dear old friend of mine, Vanessa Hurley, host of Hot Chef!” drawled Blake, slinging his arm familiarly about the TV star’s rather bare shoulders as she came to stand beside them.
To her credit, Sera noticed Ms. Hurley eased away from Blake’s embrace, looking uncomfortable.
Then again, she appeared equally queasy at the sight of Serafina.
Does she remember me from that night? Sera wondered. She seemed rather… preoccupied at the time, but if she can multitask as well as she… Sera mentally shook her head to dispel the image that lingered there. “Pleased to meet you, Vanessa,” she said, swallowing bile. “I’m a big fan of your show.” Actually, she avoided it like E. coli, but the blonde didn’t need to know that.
The look of unease had disappeared from the hostess’s eyes so completely that Sera had to wonder if she’d imagined it in the first place. “That’s awfully sweet,” said Vanessa, offering a smile so sincere Sera could easily understand how she’d made it on TV. This lady could sell barbeque sauce to the Neelys. The TV host stuck out her hand for Sera to shake. It was cool, her grip firm with just the right amount of pressure. “I’m pleased to meet you, too. Good luck today, Serafina.” Was it Sera’s imagination, or had her grip tightened for just a moment, like she was trying to tell Sera something?
I don’t have time to worry about subtext, Sera reminded herself. I’ve got a dish of whoop-ass to whip up.
“Let me show you where you’ll be stationed and explain a few of the rules my producers may not have gone over with you on the phone.” Still talking, Vanessa led Sera and Malcolm away from Blake. Sera was glad to follow, though she was so busy running through potential recipes in her head she heard only a little of what was said. As they set their things down on the leftmost of the two identical workstations, Sera scanned the prep area—digital scales, good; sheet pans, good; pastry bags, excellent. She’d brought her own sugar spinner, favorite molds and chocolate melting pots, not wanting to rely on the Blue Coyote’s resources—or on Blake to apportion them fairly.
“So, you’re all set?” Vanessa gave Sera a serene smile, adding a more reserved one for Malcolm, who was eyeing her like she was a weevil he’d found in his favorite flour container.
“Yeah, I think so,” Sera said, preoccupied. Chitchatting with the fellatrix wasn’t on her top ten list at the moment. But Vanessa seemed to want to linger for some inexplicable reason. Sera found herself a bit impatient. She laid down the chef’s kit she’d been unpacking. “I’m pretty sure I got it all, Vanessa—no outside ingredients, don’t look directly into the camera lens, don’t dunk my mike in anything. Was there something else?”
“Just one thing. A personal favor, if I might make a small request.” She spoke low enough that Malcolm, rummaging in the cabinets at their knees, couldn’t hear.
“Um, sure, I guess.” Sera was startled enough to meet Vanessa’s eyes. Gone was the treacle-sweet persona. Underneath, Sera saw a woman of steely determination—a smart, tough professional who’d worked hard to get where she was. And perhaps, a woman with some of the same regrets Sera herself had. “What can I do for you?”
“You can kick Blake Austin’s ass, Chef Wilde.”
“What? But I thought… I mean, I assumed you two were, ah, friends…”
Vanessa colored becomingly. “You’re not the only one who’s ever made a bad choice. And believe me, he’s never let me forget it. That man needs to be taken down a peg or five. You’ll be doing every woman in this industry a favor if you beat him today. So give him hell!”
And Vanessa swished off, calling for a lipstick touch-up.
I’m damn well gonna try, lady, Sera silently promised. Heads down, she and Malcolm got to work, unloading their supplies, locating staple ingredients, checking ovens, and making sure her trusty equipment was close to hand.
She didn’t look up again until a dinner gong bonnnnnnnnnnged.
“Holy shite,” muttered Malcolm.
Sera started, gazing around the restaurant for the first time in nearly an hour. Holy shite was right. The Blue Coyote was packed to the rafters.
Her heart squeezed with stage fright. It was one thing to bake anonymously, barricaded behind cooling racks and in one’s own element. It was another to perform like a trained monkey in front of a hundred strangers and with TV cameras angling to capture every move.
Do not fuck this up, Serafina Wilde, she told herself sternly.
To Sera’s right, Blake and Chef Everett stood behind their portion of the counter, arms crossed casually over their chests, looking out over the crowd with every appearance of confidence. Into the semicircle of space taped off between the chefs and their audience, Vanessa strode with equal panache. Her charisma instantly captured everyone’s attention—or perhaps it was the clingy red dress. The crowd quieted. Cameras zoomed in to catch every nuance of her stride, her smile, her flowing golden mane. The host hit her mark like a fashion model, paused, and tossed her hair over her shoulder.
“Good afternoon, Santa Fe!” Vanessa crooned. The mike discreetly clipped to her bodice made her easy to hear, even for those taking in the contest from the sidewalk outside the open French doors. A round of enthusiastic applause greeted her. “Welcome to the Winter Fiesta’s most delicious event! We’re so glad we were able to bring the Food Channel here to capture every moment of what is sure to be a baking battle royale. Is everyone excited?”
“Yeah!!!! Woooo!!!” cried the crowd. The cameras panned around to take in the reaction. Sera saw fluffy-haired Texan tourists rubbing shoulders with aging hippies, parents with their little ones on their shoulders, and a German tour group discreetly snapping pics with their mobile devices, despite the admonishments of the Food Channel producers. A cadre of curious shopkeepers had abandoned their stores to take in the contest as well. Sera recognized several of them from the neighborhood.
And right up front, grinning proudly, stood a wall of women Sera knew quite well.
Aunt Pauline, her arm about Hortencia. Aruni, bouncing on her toes with excitement. Janice, hands on hips and a grin on her lips. Syna, Bobbie, River Wind, and the rest of the Back Room Babes. All of them had come.
As one, seeing Sera had noticed them, they threw open their jackets to reveal matching T-shirts.
“Team Bliss!” their chests announced in giant pink sequined letters.
The BRBs pumped their fists and hooted. “Bliss! Bliss! Bliss! Bliss!”
That was when Sera noticed Asher, standing directly behind her aunt and Hortencia. She did a double-take when she saw he, too, was sporting a sparkly pink-lettered “Bliss” T-shirt beneath his navy peacoat. Somehow, he managed to pull it off without losing an iota of masculinity. Asher grinned broadly as he caught Sera’s eye, puffing out his chest and chanting her name with the rest.
Beside him, Guadalupe was examining her perfect manicure and trying not to look bored as she balanced on five-inch stilettos. Mr. Yazzie from next door had donned his best cardigan for the occasion. He gave Sera a shy wave. Even Friedrich, sidling close to Aruni and looking nervous in such a large crowd, had come, though in lieu of pink
sequins, he’d worn his usual uniform of ratty Nietzsche T-shirt and black skinny jeans.
Sera felt a wash of love for her Santa Fe family. I’m not letting you down. Not any of you.
Across the counter from Sera, Blake rolled his eyes and sighed as if physically pained, before seeming to realize the Food Channel’s cameras would catch every expression. He pasted an indulgent expression on his craggy features.
Vanessa took the shenanigans in stride, giving them all a gracious smile. “All right then,” she said when the noise died down. “So, does everyone want to hear how today’s contest is going to work?” she asked.
Of course they do, thought Sera. When it’s you talking, they want to know the precise rate at which plaster dries.
The crowd gave her the love she was looking for, and Vanessa accepted it graciously. “There’ll be three rounds; the first featuring our chefs’ best interpretation of local flavors, the next representing a taste of New York City, since that’s where Chef Austin and Chef Wilde both earned their whites; and the last, a freestyle, no-holds-barred chance to completely knock your socks off.” She gave the audience a smile that reminded Sera of Glenda the Good Witch.
If her eyes twinkled any more, I’d swear she had glitter in her contacts.
Vanessa continued. “There’s only one judge today—and that’s you! Everyone here is going to get a taste of each dessert, and the winner of the challenge will be decided by acclaim.” Again, that cheerful twinkle. “That means whoever gets the loudest applause wins!”
If that were the case, Sera thought, Vanessa herself would be declared the champion without having to lift a spatula. Can we just get on with this? she fretted. At her side, Malcolm was shifting from foot to foot like a caged beast, and she wasn’t sure how much more patience he’d have for the Food Channel’s theatrics. Me either, dude, she thought, shooting him a tight smile and a prayer for patience.
“Now, we don’t want anyone perishing of hunger or getting restless, so we’ve made it a rule that the chefs have a mere forty-five minutes to come up with each creation, start to finish, oven to garnish. And meanwhile…” She smiled like Oprah about to give away a fleet of cars. “While they work, we’ll be serving everyone small plates from the Blue Coyote’s kitchen and passing around hot toddies and mulled wine to keep you nice and toasty!”
This time, the audience went bananas.
Oh, great, thought Sera. They’ll be biased because Blake’s the one feeding them goodies, and too loaded to tell spun sugar from Frosted Flakes by the time the first dessert comes out of the oven. But she didn’t have much say in the matter, now that the Food Channel had stepped in. It was their show, and Sera, willy-nilly, had become one of her greatest nightmares… a reality show contestant.
Vanessa turned her pearly whites on the chefs and their seconds. “Chefs, for this first round, you’ll each have thirty seconds to snag whatever you can from the mystery ingredient trolleys. In honor of our host city, they’ve been loaded with a selection of uniquely Southwestern items for you to work with.” She ticked off ingredients on her scarlet-tipped fingers. “On each of your trolleys, you’ll find green chile, cactus flower, prickly pear, agave, apples, blue corn, tequila, pine nuts, and some staples like flour, sugar, butter, and eggs to hold it all together. The challenge is to use them—and only them—to create a confection that really screams Santa Fe.”
Vanessa turned her smile out over the audience, which beamed back, enthralled. “Do we have any locals here?” she asked. Whistles and hoots assured her she did. “Well, we expect you guys to hold our two chefs here to a high standard! If it isn’t authentic, we want to hear about it.”
The audience clapped and hollered assent.
Again, that “I float on a cloud above you” smile. “All set, Chefs?” She turned her angelic gaze on the contestants and their seconds. “Remember, just thirty seconds to make your selections.”
“Ready!” barked Blake.
“Ready,” echoed Everett.
Malcolm let out a battle cry that would have done his ancestors proud.
Sera could only nod. Her eyes were glued to her trolley, mind already whirring with ideas. Maybe a prickly-pear-infused gelee with agave and a few pine nuts for garnish. Or I could do a sweetened sponge cake textured with blue corn…
Vanessa raised her toned arms as she delivered the signature line from her hit show. “Make it sizzle!”
The gong sounded again, the crowd roared with excitement, and Sera dashed for her trolley, Malcolm hot on her heels. She whipped off the sheet and started yanking the lids off stainless steel containers.
“What kind of bollocks is this?” Malcolm bellowed.
Conscious of the cameras and the good impression they needed to make, Sera elbowed her pie maven in the ribs, shushing him. But she wanted to holler, too.
None of the lovely-sounding ingredients Vanessa had mentioned were on her trolley. She opened cylinder after cylinder. No cactus flower. No apples. No blue corn, no pine nuts, no smoky-sweet agave nectar. Not even a lowly, lonely chile pod. Instead, there was a gigantic blob of—was that?—yes, it was plain white lard, a rack of spices that could have come straight out of any grocery store, a bag of flour, and some sugar, eggs, salt, and baking powder.
Blake’s first sabotage, Sera thought, somehow unsurprised. He must have switched the ingredients in the carts—or paid off one of the PAs to do it. He’s probably paid the camera guys, too, so they won’t call attention to it. How he must be gloating right now. She glanced across the room, and sure enough, even as Sam Everett was grabbing up armfuls of ingredients—all of them as Vanessa had described—Blake was standing back, a smirk on his face as he watched Serafina discover his perfidy. His expression practically dared her to make a scene.
Which was exactly what she desperately, passionately wanted to do. She wanted to fly across the room and scratch his eyes out. She wanted to bring the whole contest to a screeching halt and call everyone’s attention to his dirty little trick. She wanted to make sure everyone saw how he operated. But she knew he’d have some ready excuse, some way to make her look like the bad guy, just as he’d done at the Anderson wedding last year. So there was only one thing to do. And that was win anyway.
Lard… lard… what the hell can I do with lard? Hm, piecrust… Nope, nothing to fill it with. Think, Sera! What uses lard besides piecrust? Biscuits? Not biscuits—too boring. Ooh, but wait! That gives me an idea!
“C’mon, Malc. Grab me that anise seed, the flour, and all the eggs you can carry. I’ll get the rest.” Sera dove for the blob of lard, snagged some sugar and spices, and hoofed it as fast as she could back to her prep area.
She knew just what to do.
Once they were back at her station, the world shrank down to just her, her helper, and the food at her fingertips. Oven: set. Ingredients: laid out. Plan: in motion. I can do this. Food was reliable. Food didn’t mess with your head. It waited for you to add the magic, and if you knew what you were doing, if you took all the right factors into account, it cooperated beautifully. “Sheet pans, Malc, and my marble pin. Oh, and snag me some of that brandy from behind the bar, will you? I don’t care if it didn’t come off the cart; if Blake’s not going to play fair, I think we can bend one tiny rule.”
Wouldn’t mind a swig of that brandy right now, Sera thought, but the booze wasn’t for her.
As she did mental calculations—need enough for at least ten dozen cookies—and shook out sugar, baking powder, and spices, Sera barely noticed the cameras zooming in on her flying fingers and recording close-ups of her tight-lipped face. She hardly heard Vanessa as she gushed over the chefs’ every move, calling the audience’s attention to their technique, their teamwork, how much time they had left.
She couldn’t have cared less what Blake—aided by Sam Everett’s sure hand, no doubt—was doing. It was all about baking the best-tasting treats of her life.
She mixed, Malcolm rolled. She shaped as he shuttled trays in and out of the oven. T
hey scarcely spoke, so intensely focused were they on the task at hand.
The gong sounded as the last batch received its final dash of cinnamon and sugar.
“Spatulas down, Chefs!” Vanessa sang out. She sashayed—classily—out in front of the crowd, making a production of turning to face the sweating chefs. Blake and Sam Everett were just tidying up the edges of what looked to be a huge cobbler of some sort—or rather, Sam was, and Blake was directing the harried pâtissier, who clearly didn’t need the help. Vanessa approached them first. “Chef Austin, tell us, what Santa Fe specialty have you made for these fine folks?”
Blake leaned his elbows on the countertop so he could address the host. His eyes dwelled for rather a long time on her cleavage before he deigned to speak. “Well, Vanessa, I think they’re really going to love this. We’ve taken some rather humble local ingredients and turned them into a dish that residents of this charming little town are sure to appreciate.” He leered into the camera in much the same fashion as he’d ogled her breasts.
Vanessa played along. “Ooh, I can’t wait. What is it?”
Sam Everett whispered in Blake’s ear. “Green Chile Apple Crumble!” Blake announced. “Can’t have dessert in Santa Fe without green chile, can we!” The audience clapped and hooted, nodding. “I’ve added notes of”—he paused again to let Everett whisper in his ear—“agave, plus locally grown apples, honey harvested from Charma…” Everett whispered again. “Excuse me, Chama, and just a hint of blue corn in the crust. Watch out, folks; this dessert’s got a bit of a kick!”
Blake’s joviality was making Sera sick. She’d forgotten how he could pour on the charm when he wanted to dazzle unsuspecting victims—er, customers. The audience seemed to be eating it up. She just hoped the crumble wasn’t as good as it looked—because it did look (and smell) pretty darn tasty. Everett’s doing, no doubt. Sera saw him flinch as the Food Channel’s PA’s started scooping out chunks and divvying the dessert up among a hundred dessert plates, taking no care whatsoever with the presentation. Sera could spare no sympathy for her fellow chef, however, because now it was her turn in the hot seat.
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