by White, Karey
“Flynn—”
“Just listen. You’ve got vacation days. I owe you a tour.”
“You don’t owe me anything.”
“Shhh. I’d like to show you the Isle of Lewis. I’d like to show ya Stornoway. I’d even like to show ya Glasgow. Why don’t ya come?”
“I can’t just head off to Scotland by myself.”
“Sure you can. And once the plane lands ya won’t be by yourself.”
“I don’t know.”
“If I bought you a plane ticket, would you come?”
“Don’t you dare. How much would it even cost?”
Flynn told me what he had paid for his flight.
“Flynn, don’t try to surprise me. That’s too much, and I couldn’t come if you did that.”
“If ya want to come, we can split it if that’ll make ya feel better.” His eyes looked so eager, and he put his hands together in front of his face imploringly. “Charlotte, I’d like ya to come.”
“I appreciate the offer, but if I ever decided to come, I would pay for the ticket myself.”
A bell rang in the background.
“Flynn, what ya doing?” It was a woman’s voice.
“Hi Jessie. I’m talking to Charlotte, the girl I met in San Francisco.”
“Hi Charlotte.” A pretty woman, probably in her mid twenties, leaned over Flynn’s shoulder and waved. She had windblown, blonde hair and dimples in her cheeks.
“Hi Jessie.” I wondered what Flynn had told her about me.
“I’m just dropping off the mail. See ya later.”
“So will ya come?” Flynn picked up the conversation like it had never been interrupted.
The invitation was tempting and I could use a vacation, although I wasn’t sure I was comfortable with what accepting it might imply.
“I’ll think about it.”
I was watching The Travel Channel when I heard the garage door open. I knew Dad and Mom would have some questions, so I turned down the volume when they walked in.
“You through talking to your friend?” Mom asked.
“Yeah. It’s getting late there.”
Mom and Dad sat down. Neither of them spoke right away. Anyone looking at us would just have assumed that we were all terribly interested in the building of the world’s largest cruise ship, but none of us were really watching it.
After a few minutes, I turned off the television. “You can ask me anything you want, and I’ll do my best to answer you. I just need to warn you that I’m not sure I’ll even know all the answers.”
Mom let out a sigh and Dad spoke first. “Flynn seems like a nice man.”
“He is. He’s very kind and thoughtful.”
“We’re glad about that. You’ve been sad for a long time, and it’s nice to see you smiling again. It’s just . . .”
Mom picked up when Dad’s voice trailed off. “Honey, have you thought about where this is going and what it will mean for you?”
“We just don’t want you to get hurt again,” Dad said.
I nodded. “I know. I don’t think it’s going anywhere, but I can’t say that for sure.”
Mom was holding her breath. I could see it. And her hands were clasped tightly in her lap. I moved over onto the couch with her and put my hand over hers. “Mom, you’ve got to breathe or you’ll die.”
Mom let out a choked breath and we all started laughing.
“Look at what you’re doing to your mother,” Dad said. “Are you trying to make me a widower?”
“If I’m doing this to Mom, imagine what I’m doing to myself,” I said. I was glad the tension was broken and we could laugh.
“What are you doing to yourself?” Mom asked.
“I really don’t know. I’m trying not to overthink everything. I’ve always planned and analyzed every detail and look where it’s gotten me. Maybe it’s time for me to quit thinking so hard and just let things happen.”
“We don’t disagree with you about that. It’s probably good for you to relax a little and worry less, but when you talk about letting things happe...” Dad’s voice trailed off again, but then he finished. “I guess we’d just be a little more comfortable if what was happening was happening with someone who lives in America.”
“I know. I couldn’t agree with you more. But just so you know, right now we’re just friends. This may not go anywhere at all. Next week we might get sick of talking to each other and never speak again. I just don’t know.”
“What if he falls in love with you?” Mom asked.
“Oh, Mom. Don’t you get it? Most guys don’t fall in love with me. We date and then they fall in love with someone else.”
“Charlotte, that’s not true. You’ve had plenty of guys who have fallen for you.”
“The only one I know for sure is Kyle. And he was so head over heels that it took him less than six months to get engaged to someone else. It’s not likely Flynn is going to fall madly in love with me. We’re just friends. In fact, he probably feels sorry for me.”
“Why would he feel sorry for you?” Mom asked.
“Because I told him everything. I even warned him that if he dates me, he’d better be ready to get married. He told me he’s going to be the one that breaks my curse.”
Mom shook her head. “Your curse. I don’t even know that it’s true.”
“How can you doubt it’s true? It’s happened with every single guy, and I’m so sick of it.”
Dad looked thoughtful for a moment. “You’re a smart girl, Charlotte, and we certainly don’t know what your future is supposed to be. Just be careful. Take things slowly.”
“And if you and this man fall in love, please have him move here,” Mom said.
I pulled into the parking lot at The Women’s Center. McKayla’s Subaru was already in the lot, so I hurried into Dr. Hapshaw’s office. McKayla put down a magazine when she saw me and pointed at a chair next to her.
“I hope they call me soon. I might have an accident in their chair if they make me wait too long.”
“I was worried you might have gone in without me. I didn’t know there was so much road construction on the way out here.”
Today was McKayla’s ultrasound. She had asked me to come with her since Connor was out of town.
“Thanks for driving out.”
“Are you kidding? I’m sorry Connor couldn’t come with you, but I’m thrilled to be here. Are you finding out what it is?”
McKayla scrunched up her face. “I think so.”
“You think so?”
“Connor left it up to me, and I keep going back and forth. Part of me wants to know so I can plan, but being surprised would be so much fun.”
I hmphed. “So you can plan? Give me a break. This is me here, remember? You can tell everyone else you want to know so you can plan, but I know you just have no patience. Zero. That’s why you’ll find out.”
McKayla giggled and then squirmed in her chair. “Don’t make me laugh. Please tell them to call my name. I’m dying here.”
“Do you hope it’s a boy or a girl?”
“I don’t care at all. Do you think we should find out or be surprised?”
I shook my head. “I’m not making the call. That’s up to you guys.”
“Which means it’s up to me. I’m sure everyone thinks I’ll find out.”
“Everyone who knows you.” I jostled her with my elbow.
“McKayla Ward? We’re ready for you.”
“Thank goodness,” McKayla said.
We followed the ultrasound technician to a room down the hall. She was about five feet tall with short, fiery red hair.
“I feel like an ogre,” McKayla whispered.
“Good, you wore stretchy pants,” said the technician, whose nametag read Poppy. Had her parents known she would have red hair?
McKayla giggled and we both looked at her. “I’m sorry. ‘Stretchy pants’ just sounded funny.”
Poppy smiled and instructed McKayla what to do.
Soo
n we were watching the screen as Poppy showed us the baby’s head and arms and legs.
“Do you want to know if it’s a boy or girl?”
McKayla looked at me.
“I told you I’m not deciding.”
She sighed. “No. I want to be surprised.”
“Wow.” I nodded.
“All right,” said Poppy.
“Can you tell?” asked McKayla, and Poppy laughed.
“Yes, but I can keep it to myself.”
“Oh never mind, just tell me.”
“Are you sure?” Poppy and I said at the same time.
“No, no. Don’t tell me.”
“I’ll tell you what. I’ll write it down and put it in an envelope. That way you don’t have to decide right now.”
Poppy wrote down some measurements and snapped a couple of pictures before she told McKayla she could go to the bathroom. While McKayla was out of the room, Poppy wrote something on a paper and sealed it in the envelope. When she came back, Poppy handed her two photographs and the envelope.
“Congratulations. Your baby looks healthy and happy.”
I followed McKayla to Su Casa, where we ate fish tacos. The sealed envelope sat on the table between us.
“It would shock everyone if I didn’t find out, wouldn’t it?” she asked.
“Just because it would be totally out of character.”
“I feel like being surprised.”
“Then throw it away.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
We laughed.
“Mom says you were dating a guy from Scotland.”
I rolled my eyes. “Dating is a strong word for it. We went out a couple of times while he was here visiting his brother.”
“Mom says you’re still talking to him.”
“We talk sometimes.”
“Mom’s worried you’re going to fall in love and move to Scotland.”
“What is with everyone? I’m not moving to Scotland.”
“If you guys fall in love, he’ll move here?”
“We’re friends. We’re not falling in love.”
“So what’s he like?”
“He’s thoughtful and kind and good-looking, in a big, Scottish lumberjack sort of way.”
McKayla’s mood became serious. “I love you and I want you to be happy, but I don’t think I could stand it if you moved to Scotland. I want my baby to know its Aunt Charlie.”
I reached across the table and squeezed McKayla’s hand. “Don’t worry. I’m not moving anywhere.”
McKayla squeezed back. “Good. Now do me a favor and go throw that in the garbage.” She pointed at the envelope on the table.
“Are you sure?”
“Positive.”
I picked up the envelope and walked to a combination ashtray and garbage can just outside the door. I glanced into the garbage and immediately knew if I threw it away, it would be there to stay. I looked through the glass door at McKayla as I held the envelope over the opening. When she smiled and nodded, I dropped it.
Will and Gina lived in a 1920s bungalow in Berkeley. They had bought it as a fixer-upper last year when Will got a job in the prosecutor’s office. Their first fix had been the nursery. They had painted it lavender with white trim. In one corner, Gina had painted a white tree, its branches stretching across the wall above the crib. A white bird sat on a limb. All the furniture was white and an antique chandelier hung from the ceiling. It was the prettiest nursery I had ever seen.
Just before Gina gave birth to Emily, they’d had the kitchen renovated, knocking out a wall so it was bigger and brighter and opened onto a sitting area on the covered porch. This was my favorite part of the house.
“We’ve moved the tv out here,” Will said. “You won’t want to hang out in the living room. It’s a disaster.”
“Will’s sanding the paint off all the woodwork in there.”
“I still can’t imagine why people painted over all that trim. Especially the beams.”
“I’ll bet that’s a huge job,” I said.
“I’m glad I didn’t know how hard it would be or I might not have started it. It’ll be worth it when it’s finished.”
“Charlotte, are you sure you’re okay with this?” Gina asked as I took Emily from her arms. “She still doesn’t sleep through the night.”
“I’m not just okay with it. I’ve been living for this weekend ever since we first talked about it. You can’t deny me now.”
Gina giggled, but it sounded more nervous than happy.
“Everything will be fine,” Will said and put his arm around Gina’s shoulders. “Charlotte will take good care of her.”
“I know. I know. I’m not doubting you, Charlotte.” Her voice changed to baby talk. “I’ve just never left you overnight before, have I, little peanut?” She kissed Emily’s chubby cheek half a dozen times.
“I promise we’ll be fine. I’ve got both of your cell numbers. The doctor’s number is on the fridge. Mom’s less than an hour away. Everything’s going to be great.”
“Thanks, Charles.” Will tugged on my ponytail as he walked by, pulling Gina behind him.
“I’ll call and check in later tonight,” Gina said as she firmly planted her feet and refused to move another inch until she had kissed Emily again.
When Will and Gina had first talked about going away for their anniversary, they had planned on a three-day weekend, but sometime in the last few weeks, they’d changed it to just Saturday to Sunday. Gina couldn’t stand the thought of being away from Emily for more than one night. I was a little disappointed, but I understood.
“At least we’ve got all day today and all day tomorrow,” I said to her as I fed her a bottle. She looked at me as she ate, pausing to give me a milky smile every few sips. She was charming.
A lasagna was baking in the oven, Emily was in her bouncer on the kitchen table, and I was pulling a bag of salad out of the refrigerator when the doorbell rang.
It was Angus.
“Charles, what are you doing here?”
“I’m watching Emily while Will and Gina are in Eureka for their anniversary.”
“Oh, I forgot that was this weekend. I’m just dropping off Will’s GoPro.”
“Cool. What did you film?”
“Aleena and I went mountain biking at McLaren.”
“I didn’t know Aleena was a mountain biker.”
“It was her first time, but she did great.” Angus handed me the camera bag.
“Hey, you should stay for lasagna. Gina left a whole pan.”
“We were just headed out to dinner.” Angus turned and pointed to his car at the curb. Aleena waved from the passenger seat and I waved back.
“Oh. I didn’t know she was with you. You guys have fun.”
“Unless,” Angus looked from the car back to me. “I can check with Aleena and see if she wants to stick around and eat with you. If there’s enough.”
“There’s plenty,” I said. “But I don’t want to ruin your plans.”
“Let me talk to her.”
Angus walked down the sidewalk and opened the car door to talk to Aleena. I don’t know why I felt so awkward waiting there. This was Angus and Aleena. Two of my best friends in the world. But I had never been with them as a couple before, and it felt strange to have the two of them deciding together if they wanted to fit me into their evening. I wished I hadn’t invited him. What if they said no? Would it feel like a double rejection?
Aleena got out of the car, and they walked to the house together. They looked adorable. Aleena was so tiny and cute next to Angus.
“Yay! You’re staying,” I said.
“Gina’s lasagna is as good as anything we could go get,” Angus said.
“And we might as well keep you company,” said Aleena.
“The lasagna’s got about twenty more minutes,” I said. “That sounds like just the right amount of time for Angus to mix up some chocolate chip cookies.”
“You bake?” Aleena asked.<
br />
“He makes great cookies.”
“I’ll help you,” Aleena said.
Emily needed to be fed, so I held her and gave her a bottle while Angus and Aleena mixed up cookie dough. It was odd to watch them. I knew them so well individually, but watching them with each other felt like watching two strangers.
“Where are the cookie sheets?” Aleena asked.
“Above the refrigerator,” I said.
Aleena used a stepstool to retrieve one. “Look. I’m as tall as you,” she said.
Angus stepped closer. “No, I’ve still got you by a couple of inches.”
“I don’t think so.” She moved her free hand between the top of her head and the top of his. “I don’t know. Looks pretty even to me.”
And then she put her hand behind his neck, pulled him closer, and kissed him. On the mouth.
“This is great. I can kiss you without getting a neck ache.”
Suddenly, it was like an awkward bomb had detonated in the room. I wasn’t sure why. Angus and Aleena were dating, so it shouldn’t be strange that they acted like it. Angus looked at me. Aleena looked from Angus to me and back. I quickly looked at Emily.
“Oh my, you smell terrible,” I said to Emily, even though all I could smell was the lasagna. “We’d better go change your diaper.” I couldn’t get out of the room fast enough.
I had been in Emily’s room a couple of minutes when I heard the timer go off.
“Hey, Charles?” Angus called. “Do you want me to take this out?”
“Sure. I’ll be there in a minute.”
When I returned to the kitchen, the awkwardness had passed, and we sat down to Gina’s delicious lasagna and a salad.
“Have you heard from Flynn?” Aleena asked between bites.
“We talked last night for a while.”
“You’re still talking to him?” Angus asked. He sounded surprised.
“They’ve been talking a lot,” Aleena said.
“I don’t know if I’d say ‘a lot.’” I really didn’t want to talk about this.
“I think he really likes Charlotte,” Aleena said.
“We’re friends.”
“How much do you talk?” Angus asked.
“A couple of times a week, I guess.”
“Maybe at the beginning it was a couple of times a week, but hasn’t it picked up lately?” Aleena asked.