“Madam, what makes you think I would lose?”
“Somehow I can't see you throwing hatchets at a target.”
“Throwing hatchets?”
“Sean McCarthy's idea. Those Scottish are quite brutal.” She laughed as she described the contest to her husband. Ginny had first hand knowledge of how brutal the medieval Scottish could be.
“Perhaps I will find another competition in which to embarrass myself.” His laughter was a balm to Ginny. After a year of guilt and pain, it seemed a little too easy to forgive him. The more she thought about it, the more she realized that it would be okay. The romance novel world guaranteed he would never wander from her again.
“I should get cleaned up and changed. I doubt the good women of Headley would appreciate my... current fashion statement.”
“Indeed.” His eyes turned smoky and his stare intense. “I could not agree less. I find your current dress rather... alluring.”
Hearing the passion in his voice, feeling herself respond to it automatically, Ginny wasn't quite ready to forgive him that much. She had only spent a few months in Scotland with Ian, her first mega-hunk, and she had already spent over a year in this life. Ginny felt her real life slipping away at times, and would do anything she could to remember little things about it. Songs, nursery rhymes, TV commercials. Anything to prevent her from forgetting the 21st century. If she slept with him and got herself pregnant, then she might move on like her previous experience. Ginny just couldn't make herself do it yet. Maybe it was pride, but mostly she thought it was her own sense of how things needed to progress. Soon, she thought, soon.
“Be that as it may, I believe I shall prevent loads of local gossip by simply putting on a gown.” Not that putting on a gown was all that easy. After all, it did require the assistance of her maid.
“As you wish, my lady.”
Ginny felt her steps moving closer to him. Felt herself giving in to the desire she heard in his voice. Maybe one kiss wouldn't hurt. It might even smooth things over for when they finally did get to the point where they were sharing a bed again. Wouldn't want their first kiss to happen then, it might be too awkward. Yes, she considered, it would be too awkward. We should get better acquainted over a simple kiss now. When it came to justification, Ginny was the Queen.
Colin, sensing the change in her, moved closer as well. They met, standing in front of each other in her small garden, toe to toe. Ginny looked up into his eyes, smiling to let him know what she wanted. As Colin bent his neck down to brush his lips against hers, they heard a gasp.
“So there you are, Lord Whitmore. What a pleasure to have you home!” The voice was dripping with sarcasm, something that Evelyn had learned from Ginny.
Turning away from his wife, Colin stood looking at his sister. “Evelyn, what a surprise. Were we expecting you?”
“I cannot imagine you were expecting anyone. Lord Collingsford and I were in the neighborhood and decided to pay Bethany a visit. Imagine my surprise when Pearce told me you had finally come home.” Evelyn's eyes were blazing. She would have her say, there was no way around that. Ginny had no intention of being involved.
“Well, you two obviously have much to discuss. I will just go and get changed.” Ginny walked over to her sister-in-law and gave her a kiss. In a whisper, Ginny spoke so only Evelyn could hear. “Try not to yell too much, Evelyn. It's time to forgive.”
Evelyn gave Ginny an incredulous look. “How can you, of all people, say that, Bethany? After what he did to you.”
Ginny stopped and faced her sister-in-law. “Yes, Evelyn. It happened to me and I have forgiven him. Hating him would only have hurt me, so it wasn't worth it. I wasn't exactly an angel either, as you remember. The past can't be undone, so there is no sense in wallowing in it.” Ginny walked back to the house, leaving the brother and sister their time to set things right.
Evelyn couldn't believe her ears. Pearce said that Whitmore had only been home a week. How could she get over the past year so quickly. Turning her head and looking at Colin in the eye, she asked, “Did you accomplish what you wanted, brother?”
“I am sorry for hurting you, Evelyn. My behavior was deplorable and I suspect it will take a long time to forgive myself for what I did to my wife. I never read your letters, because I refused to take responsibility for my behavior. I am back now and I hope to make things up to Bethany. I thank you for your friendship to her. I know you and Collingsford helped her immeasurably.”
Evelyn snorted. Surely her brother didn't think he could receive her forgiveness so easily. She walked around the garden, looking at the flowers, speculating how he managed to receive Bethany's forgiveness so easily. She decided to ask him. “How is it you can abandon your life, break your vows with many different women and your wife forgave you so quickly?”
Colin's gaze dropped to his boots. He had to be honest, since his sister deserved no less. “I do not know. I am the luckiest man in England, to be sure. After a contentious couple of days, she suddenly had a change of heart. She wanted to forget everything over the past year and start new. You see, I am to woo her, court her as if we were never married. She asked me to remind her why she used to like me.”
Evelyn stopped and turned to face him. “You are courting your wife?”
Smiling, thinking back to the conversation, he answered, “Yes, I am. We talk about everything. Our discussions are quite lively. When you arrived, we were talking about the upcoming summer festival and how I would humiliate myself participating in the competitions.”
“I... I am...” Evelyn didn't know what to say. She was astounded at Bethany's ability to move on. There were things in her own marriage that she had trouble getting past, and those were not nearly as bad as what Colin had done. Walking away, back toward the house, she wondered if she should learn something from this.
Colin walked behind his sister, knowing that the situation had unsettled her. Truth be told, he was shocked at how his wife overcame her anger and had somehow thoroughly moved on. He wasn't lying when he told his sister that he was the luckiest man in England. Now, he needed to figure out a way to get his wife alone again, so he could continue with the kiss he longed to give her. Maybe he could surprise her outside her bedroom door before she went off to the village. Thought in hand, Colin quickened his step back to the house.
Colin missed his wife by minutes, catching her in the entryway instead. She was talking to his brother-in-law about horses. He thought it strange that his wife would have any knowledge of the topic, since she so disliked riding the animals. Perhaps over the past year, she'd improved her riding skills. Just another thing he didn't know about her.
Walking up behind her, he spoke for the first time to Lord Collingsford in over a year. “Collingsford, it is good to see you.” Colin extended his hand and wondered if his brother-in-law would take it.
Never one to be rude for any reason, Collingsford did take the proffered hand and shook it. “It is nice to see you home, Whitmore. I was just discussing a fine bit of horseflesh with your wife. She knows nothing of horses, but always seems to have an interesting opinion worth listening to.”
Laughing, Ginny remarked, “Well, I may know little about horses, but I've become quite stingy in the purse. I still say you're being taken.”
Collingsford agreed. “It does seem a mighty sum for a horse who has yet to prove himself. Damn fine looking animal, though.”
“Is that what brought you to Headley?” Colin asked.
“Indeed. The stables just outside Farnham boasted quite a selection of runners. Their prices though, as you wife has pointed out, seem a bit excessive. Evelyn insisted on coming here afterward. I hope we are not intruding though.”
“Not at all. Will you stay the night?” Colin was conflicted, both wanting them to stay, but wanting to be alone with Bethany.
“Bethany... I mean, Lady Whitmore, has kindly extended an invitation to us. We would by happy to accept.”
“Simon, I've told you it's fine to call me Be
thany. Colin is well aware of my propensity toward familiarity. It may drive him mad, but I'm sure he finds it to be a very endearing trait as well.”
Lifting an eyebrow to his wife, he remarked, “Endearing, indeed. It nearly got me beaten up by my steward.”
Ginny was shocked. “What? Why?”
“Never you mind, my dear. Now, Collingsford, tell me about this horse. I am always in the market for fine horseflesh.”
The two men began to walk into the drawing room, when Ginny mentioned, “Well, I guess I'll be leaving now.” She then turned and went about walking to the door. Before she could open it, Colin was by her side.
Whispering in her ear, he said, “Have fun at your meeting, my dear. I shall look forward to continuing our conversation from the garden before we were interrupted by my sister.”
The whispered promise made Ginny tingle with excitement. Continue, indeed, she thought as he opened the door for her and all but pushed her out. Taking her seat in the curricle next to Lyle, she smiled over the promise. She should make him wait. Wait until he was about to burst, as a matter-of-fact. Staring at the scenery, she wondered how the evening would end and if either one would be satisfied or frustrated.
Chapter 23
Dinner was a bland affair. Although Ginny would constantly bring up a topic for conversation, the rest of the party would only answer in monosyllables or grunts. Evelyn, who was usually very willing to talk since her husband usually wouldn't, seemed distant. Ginny knew she was mad at Colin, but was beginning to wonder if she was also mad at her. Ginny had commiserated with her over her rotten marriage enough to wonder if Evelyn felt betrayed by her sudden turn around.
Colin was keeping quiet, afraid to say something that would lead to more unpleasant talk about his sudden disappearance last year. And Collingsford, who was usually so quiet and reserved, was the only one willing to talk to her. Still, the talk would usually end abruptly and leave an uncomfortable silence.
When supper ended, Ginny was thrilled. She and Evelyn retired together to the drawing room, leaving the men to seek out their cigars and port. Once seated, Ginny thought it was time to lay everything out in the open.
“Evelyn, I know you're probably disappointed in me for forgiving Colin.”
Standing up and walking to the window, Evelyn replied, “It is your life, Bethany. I cannot make that decision for you.”
“I wouldn't ask you to. I just wanted to explain.” Just then, a maid entered with a tea tray. Placing it on the table, she quickly exited, closing the door behind her.
“Would you like some tea?” Ginny asked, hoping to bring her back to the settee.
“No, thank you,” was her only reply.
Ginny realized this would be tougher than she thought. “What else can I do, Evelyn. We can't get a divorce. Would you have us live as strangers forever?”
Turning around and looking at her sister-in-law, Evelyn realized her folly. “No, I would not want that. I want only for you and Colin to be happy. Though I am quite angry with him, I still love my brother. But, I just cannot understand how you could forgive him so quickly. After all the anger and disappointment. After how he abandoned you so callously.”
“Come and sit down, Evelyn and I will try to explain.” She waited for her sister-in-law to take her seat and then Ginny continued. “I was very angry. Every thing I said to him was an accusation. I called him dreadful names and used words that no lady should use. But when I was done, I didn't feel any better. I felt worse. It just didn't seem worth it.”
“How do you know he will behave?”
Laughing at her choice of words, she said, “I don't. I can only have faith that he's changed now that he had his holiday.”
“What about Miles?”
Ginny's gaze turned down to her lap. She knew Evelyn was wondering most about their night together, in her townhouse. “That night with Miles ended before anything could happen. I'm glad it did. Our flirtation caused me too much guilt that it was never very enjoyable. I have written to Miles, letting him know that I value his friendship, but our acquaintance can never be more than that. Not just because of Colin being back, but because I'm not cut out for infidelity.”
Softening her eyes, smiling slightly, Evelyn said, “I still think you should make him wait longer. I saw the two of you about to kiss in the garden today.”
“That would have been the first kiss since his return. I have not allowed him back in my bed. I'm not ready for that intimacy yet.”
“Good. Make him wait!”
Laughing, enjoying their renewed friendship, Ginny smiled. “You are positively evil, Evelyn. It's what I like about you.”
The two women laughed and continued their conversation on safer topics. Ginny knew everything would eventually be alright. In fact, for the first time, she felt like the story was going where it was supposed to go. But where would it lead when it finally ended?
The men had just finished their port and Colin was about to go out into the garden to smoke his cigar when Pearce appeared. In his usual stoic manner, he addressed Lord Collingsford. “My lord, your wife has asked me to tell you that she has retired and wishes you to come to bed immediately.”
Quirking an eyebrow up to Colin, he replied, “I have learned over the years not to keep your sister waiting. She has quite a temper.”
“I lived with her many years longer than you, my friend, and know exactly what you mean.”
“Good night, Whitmore. It is good to have you home.”
“Thank you. It is good to be home.”
Lord Collingsford rose and left the room. Before Pearce could disappear, Colin asked, “And where is my wife, Pearce?”
“Lady Whitmore went for a walk about the garden, my lord.”
“Thank you. I was about to take a turn myself.”
Colin walked out to the stone terrace and went to the edge to try to spy his wife's location. His intent was to finish what he started this morning, before his sister so rudely interrupted. Squinting his eyes to the dark night, he spotted some light yellow muslin heading toward the maze.
Walking quickly, hoping to catch up, Colin was surprised at how easily he could still navigate his garden. His wife could have destroyed his pride and joy, or even could have rearranged things, but she kept it just as he'd left it. The only change she made was adding her own garden, and that was placed in the back, out of the way. He owed her so much, and he planned to use their lifetime together to repay her. But for now, he had one thing in mind and that was to kiss his wife.
Reaching the entrance to the maze, he stopped and listened. He thought he could hear singing. Following the sound, he found her in the center, on the marble bench placed for those lucky enough to find it.
His wife was indeed singing. He didn't recognize the song. The melody was as unfamiliar as the words. Her voice was like an angel's, singing the words with emotion.
“You used to the best to make life be life to me
And I hope that you're still out there and you're like you used to be
We'll have ourselves a time and we'll dance till the morning sun
And we'll let the good times come in, and we won't stop till we're done
We'll be back in the high life again
All the doors I closed one time, will open up again
We'll be back in the high life again
All the eyes that watched us once will smile and take us in”
The sound of gravel under Colin's feet alerted Ginny to his proximity. She stopped singing at once, turned and stared at him standing a few yards away. A blush crept up her cheeks as she realized he'd been standing there for some time.
“I am not familiar with that song. What is it called?” Colin wanted to put her at ease, now feeling guilty for sneaking up on her.
“No song you'd have ever heard before.” But only because it was written more than a hundred fifty some years in the future by Stevie Winwood, she thought. She should have known that he would follow her out here. Ginny sensed
that Colin had been trying all day to finish what he started that morning.
“Am I disturbing you?” Colin's face showed his anxiety, his desperation for her to welcome him over.
“Of course not, Colin. Please, have a seat.” Ginny patted the empty spot next to her. She often came out to the garden to sing. She loved Bethany's voice. It was much better than the strangled cat noises she used to make in her own body.
As if reading her mind, Colin said, “You have a beautiful voice, my dear. You should exhibit more often.”
Smiling at his compliment, she replied, “I'm not much into singing in front of people. Thus the reason I hide in the garden.” Turning her head to stare at her hands in her lap, the moment seemed awkward. She wanted him to kiss her, but didn't want him to know that. It was one of those games that Ginny had never been good at.
Colin reached over and pulled her face up to look at him. “There was something I wished to give you this morning. I still would if you are willing.”
Ginny felt her eyes tear up and prayed she wouldn't cry. What was there to cry about? she asked herself. Instead, she nodded slowly and closed her eyes.
His lips brushed against hers lightly before kissing her closed eyes, her nose and forehead. As far as kisses went, it wasn't the most seductive, but it wasn't meant to be. Colin wanted her to relax, wanted her to want it as much as he did. He caught her off guard, and now needed to get her to loosen up.
Opening her eyes, Ginny stared back at her husband. His expression spoke of lust, pure and simple. The need to have him came on so suddenly, she was shaken for a moment. When the moment passed, she leaned in and started to kiss him back. She opened his mouth and let her tongue slip inside the man she'd barely known before becoming his wife. He tasted of wine and cigars. More than that, it tasted familiar, like a favorite pair of shoes, comfortable and predictable.
Colin hardly believed what she was doing. Taking full advantage, he enclosed his arms around her and pulled her closer. He wanted to feel her body against his, even if this was all she would grant him right now. When his sweet wife climbed onto his lap and rubbed against him provocatively, his breath caught in his throat. His hand reached around and rubbed her breast, coaxed her nipple erect and made her gasp at his touch.
A Lesson in Forgiveness Page 21