Your mind continually urges you to strive in spite of the all-providing perfection of the Tao; it prompts you to pursue fame, to look for a groove or purpose. Lao-tzu encourages you to do precisely the opposite: Stay outside the rat race and let your mind be in peaceful harmony with the Tao rather than worrying and fighting. The concluding line of this passage of the Tao Te Ching says it all, instructing you to change how you look at your life by “knowing to take sustenance from the great Mother!”
The following are suggestions coming from Lao-tzu to you in the 20th verse of the Tao:
Practice letting go of thoughts about what’s not here now.
Just allow yourself to meld into the perfection of the universe you live in. You don’t need another thing to be happy; it’s all being provided for you right here, right now. Be in this moment, and free yourself of striving for something more or someone else. This is a mind exercise that will put you in touch with the peace of the Tao. Affirm: It is all perfect. God’s love is everywhere and forgets no one. I trust in this force to guide me, and I am not allowing ego to enter now. Notice how free you feel when you relax into this no-fears, no-worries attitude.
Take time to “let go and let God,” every single day.
Say the words over and over to yourself until you can actually tell what the difference feels like. Letting go is a markedly distinct physical and psychological experience, much different from striving. Let go of your demands, along with your beliefs that you can’t be happy because of what is supposedly missing in your life. Insisting that you need what you don’t have is insane! The fact that you’re okay without what you think you need is the change you want to see. Then you can note that you already have everything you need to be peaceful, happy, and content right here and right now! Relax into this knowing, and affirm again and again: I am letting go and letting God. I am a glorious infant nursing at the great all-providing Mother’s breast.
Do the Tao Now
Begin to notice the situations where you’re not in the moment because you’re striving to complete or attain something for a future benefit. You may not realize how often you endeavor to accomplish all sorts of things with the idea that once you do, you’ll finally have the time to do what you really want. This is one of the most pernicious ways that many of us unconsciously prevent (or perpetually postpone) a life free of striving. It’s a tough one to become aware of, and may be easiest to see when your free time becomes hijacked by family members or business emergencies.
Here’s an example: You’ve put in extra hours at work all week in order to have a deliciously imagined free day to [fill in the blank], when you learn that your spouse has invited a friend of a friend who’s never been to this part of the country before—and whom you’ve never met—to stay at your home.
There are two opportunities to practice living without striving in this situation. The first, of course, is to catch yourself wrapped up in striving for future benefit, notice what you’re doing, and focus on the now. The second comes after the example above, which is a difficult but incredibly rewarding exercise. Do the Tao now by accepting what is offered—that is, know that this situation, in some way that your striving ego rejects, is actually sustenance from the Great Mother.
21st Verse
The greatest virtue is to follow the Tao and the Tao alone.
The Tao is elusive and intangible.
Although formless and intangible,
it gives rise to form.
Although vague and elusive,
it gives rise to shapes.
Although dark and obscure,
it is the spirit, the essence,
the life breath of all things.
Throughout the ages, its name has been preserved
in order to recall the beginning of all things.
How do I know the ways of all things at the beginning?
I look inside myself and see what is within me.
Living the
Elusive Paradox
Here in this 21st verse of the Tao Te Ching, Lao-tzu takes us back to the book’s very first premise: living the mystery. He has returned to the idea’s definition and virtue and reaffirmed it with greater clarity and precision. In this lesson, he not only asks us to become conscious of the elusive nature of the Tao, a principle that simply cannot be pinned down or experienced with the senses, but to also validate this awareness by recognizing ourselves as examples of this elusive paradox.
Reread the concluding lines of this important verse: “How do I know the ways of all things at the beginning? I look inside myself and see what is within me.” Now go all the way back to your own beginning—how did you get here? I don’t mean from a droplet or particle of human protoplasm; go even before that. Quantum physics teaches that particles emerge from an invisible and formless energy field. So all creation, including your own, is a function of motion: from formless energy to form, from spirit to body, from the nameless Tao to a named object. The process of creation, along with the theme of understanding eternal namelessness, runs throughout the Tao Te Ching. This is the elusive paradox that you’re invited to contemplate, allow, and experience. You can know it by examining your own nature and recognizing that the same principle that creates everything is animating your every thought and action.
Right now make a simple decision to move your index finger. Now wiggle your toes. Next, lift your arm. Finally, ask yourself, What is it that allows me to make these movements? In other words, what is it that allows you to see shapes and colors? What force behind your eyes invisibly signals you to process the sky as blue or a tree as tall? What is the formless energy that tweaks a vibration somewhere in your ear to give rise to sound?
What it all is, is formless and nameless. Yes, it is vague. Yes, it is obscure. And when you begin to see the world in this manner, you begin knowing that aspect of yourself. This is what Lao-tzu describes as “the life breath of all things,” and it needn’t remain a mystery. You have the same eternal Tao inside of you, and you apply it a million times a day. It is within you . . . it is you.
This far-reaching verse of the Tao Te Ching asks you to let go of seeking results in money, accomplishments, acquisitions, fame, and so on. Instead, shift your attention to the energy in the beginning of all things—the elusive and intangible Tao. The greatest virtue is to find this nameless, formless force within yourself. Know it by looking within and seeing it at work in all of your thoughts and actions.
This is what Lao-tzu was conveying to you more than 2,500 years before your birth:
Have an unquenchable thirst for the intangible and enigmatic force that supports all life.
Communicate with the Source regularly: Ask for its guidance, and meditate on its sacredness. The more you practice benevolent reverence for the invisible Tao, the more you’ll feel connected to it. The presence of a known connection with the Tao will release you from the worry, stress, and anxiety that are ego’s way of looking at the world. While others around you may stay focused on their pursuit of wealth, fame, and power, you’ll notice it and smile compassionately as you practice being in a state of appreciation for “the life breath of all things,” including yourself. You’ll feel safe and secure knowing that you’re in a Divine partnership with the all-knowing, all-providing Tao.
I suggest that you simply take a moment or two several times a day to say aloud, “Thank You, God, for everything.” Make this your own personal respectful ritual. In fact, just a moment ago I said 21st Verse these very words: “Thank You, God, for allowing these words to appear, supposedly from my pen. I know that the Source of everything, including these words, is the elusive and intangible Tao.”
Memorize the final two lines of this verse and silently recite them when needed.
Repeat these two sentences: “How do I know the ways of all things at the beginning? I look inside myself and see what is within me.” Doing so will remind you that the Tao comes from the truth that’s inside of you at all times. Give up trying to persuade anyone else of the corr
ectness of your vision—when they’re ready, their own teachers will surely appear.
Here’s a concluding thought on the elusive nature of the Tao, written by Hafiz many centuries after the death of Lao-tzu:
If you think that the Truth can be known
From words,
If you think that the Sun and the Ocean
Can pass through that tiny opening called the mouth.
O someone should start laughing!
Someone should start wildly laughing—
Now!
Do the Tao Now
Today, become conscious of the force that allows your every movement. For five minutes in your meditation, stay in “the gap” between your thoughts and notice the elusive but omnipresent invisible Source that allows you to speak, hear, touch, and move. (I’ve created a meditation that can assist you in this process, and it’s included in my book Getting in the Gap.)
22nd Verse
The flexible are preserved unbroken.
The bent become straight.
The empty are filled.
The exhausted become renewed.
The poor are enriched.
The rich are confounded.
Therefore the sage embraces the one.
Because he doesn’t display himself,
people can see his light.
Because he has nothing to prove,
people can trust his words.
Because he doesn’t know who he is,
people recognize themselves in him.
Because he has no goal in mind,
everything he does succeeds.
The old saying that the flexible are preserved unbroken is surely right!
If you have truly attained wholeness,
everything will flock to you.
Living with
Flexibility
Having lived by the ocean for many years, I’ve observed the beauty and majesty of the tall palm trees that grow at the water’s edge, often measuring 30 or 40 feet in height. These stately giants are able to withstand the enormous pressure that hurricane-force winds bring as they blow at speeds up to 200 miles per hour. Thousands of other trees in the huge storms’ paths are uprooted and destroyed, while the stately palms remain fixed in their rooted selves, proudly holding sway over their otherwise decimated domain. So what is the palm trees’ secret to staying in one piece? The answer is flexibility. They bend almost down to the ground at times, and it’s that very ability that allows them to remain unbroken.
In this 22nd verse of the Tao Te Ching, Lao-tzu invites you to embrace a similar quality of elasticity. Begin to sense the oneness that is the Tao supplying your resiliency and grounding, helping you withstand the storms of your life as pliantly as the supple palm tree. When destructive energy comes along, allow yourself to resist brokenness by bending. Look for times you can make the choice to weather a storm by allowing it to blow through without resistance. By not fighting, but instead relaxing and going with all that confronts you, you enter “the Tao time.”
This verse implies an added benefit of wholeness, which attracts everything to you. That is, if you want abundance, knowledge, health, love, and all the other attributes that personify the Tao, you need to be receptive to them. Lao-tzu instructs that you must be empty in order to become filled, for attachments keep you so restricted that nothing can enter your already-filled self. Being empty in this sense means not being full of beliefs, possessions, or ego-driven ideas, but rather remaining open to all possibilities. This is in keeping with the nameless Tao: It doesn’t restrict itself to a particular point of view or a singular way of doing things; it animates all. Similarly, the flexible person is open to all possibilities—there’s nothing for him or her to prove because the Tao, not ego, is in charge.
Awareness of the Tao nurtures flexibility, and removing your rigidity creates an atmosphere of trust. When you live from the perspective of being able to say, “I don’t know for certain, but I’m willing to listen,” you become a person whom others identify with. Why? Because your flexibility lets them see that their point of view is welcome. By being open to all possibilities, everyone who encounters you feels their ideas are valuable and there’s no need for conflict.
As you connect more and more to your Tao nature, you begin noticing that this principle is perpetually present, available in every moment. In other words, the Tao isn’t trying to get someplace other than where it is. It has no goals, no desire, no judgments; it flows everywhere because it is the energy of creation. To be in harmony with the Tao is to be free of goals, immersed in all that you’re doing without concern about the outcome—just noticing in each moment and allowing yourself to flow with the creative Source that’s energizing everything and everyone in the universe. When you live in this way, failure becomes an impossibility. How can you fail at being yourself and trusting completely in the wisdom of the Source of everything? With failure removed from your life, you understand what Lao-tzu means when he says that “everything he does succeeds.”
Following are the messages from Lao-tzu as he wrote out this 22nd verse of the Tao Te Ching two-and-a-half millennia ago:
Change the way you see the storms of your life.
Work at removing ego as the dominant influence over you. Release the need for the attention of others and witness how people become drawn to you naturally. Let go of having to win an argument and being right by changing the atmosphere with a statement such as “You’re very likely correct. Thanks for giving me a new 22nd Verse perspective.” This kind of a proclamation gives everyone permission to relax their rigidity because you have no need to prove yourself or make others wrong. If you change the way you think, the life you’re living will change, so be willing to say, “I don’t know” or “I’m uncertain as to why I even did what I did.” As Lao-tzu reminds you, when you suspend your pomposity and rigidity, others recognize themselves in your flexible nature, and they’ll trust you.
Imagine yourself as a tall, stately palm tree.
Be an organism without goals and objectives—instead, stand strong and successful, capable of adjusting to the forces of nature. Be willing to adapt to whatever may come your way by initially allowing yourself to experience that energy, much like the bending tree in hurricane-force winds. When criticism comes, listen. When powerful forces push you in any direction, bow rather than fight, lean rather than break, and allow yourself to be free from a rigid set of rules—in so doing, you’ll be preserved and unbroken. Keep an inner vision of the wind symbolizing difficult situations as you affirm: I have no rigidity within me. I can bend to any wind and remain unbroken. I will use the strength of the wind to make me even stronger and better preserved.
This simple teaching is so pleasant that you’ll wonder why you didn’t realize it before. In the Tao time, acknowledge the “storm” and then allow it to be felt in your body—observe it without judgment, just like the tree bends in the wind. As rigidity reappears, notice that as well, allowing the winds to blow as you exercise the Tao in place of ego! Seek to uncover the root of your stiffness and achieve greater flexibility in the storms of life. When seen as this kind of opportunity to open to the Tao energy, storminess can be transformed into exhilarating events that uncover more of your true nature of love.
Do the Tao Now
Listen to someone express an opinion that’s the opposite of yours today. It could be on any of a variety of topics, such as politics, the environment, religion, drugs, war, the death penalty, or what have you. Refuse to impose your position, and instead remark, “I’ve never considered that point of view. Thank you for sharing your ideas with me.” By allowing a contrary position to be heard, you’ll dismiss ego’s attitude and welcome the flexibility of the Tao.
23rd Verse
To talk little is natural:
Fierce winds do not blow all morning;
a downpour of rain does not last the day.
Who does this? Heaven and earth.
But these are exaggerated, forced effects,
&nb
sp; and that is why they cannot be sustained.
If heaven and earth cannot sustain a forced action,
how much less is man able to do?
Those who follow the Way
become one with the Way.
Those who follow goodness
become one with goodness.
Those who stray from the Way and goodness
become one with failure.
If you conform to the Way,
its power flows through you.
Your actions become those of nature,
your ways those of heaven.
Open yourself to the Tao
and trust your natural responses . . .
then everything will fall into place.
Living Naturally
Every thing that composes ultimately decomposes. Notice that I put the emphasis on the word thing—that’s because all things on Earth are temporary and in a constant state of change. Since you’re on this planet, you too are a part of this always-changing and always-decomposing principle. In this 23rd verse of the Tao Te Ching, you’re asked to observe the ways of nature and then make the choice to live harmoniously with them.
Nature doesn’t have to insist, push, or force anything; after all, storms don’t last forever. Winds blow hard, but then they subside. The Tao creates from an eternal perspective, but everything is on its return trip home the moment it comes into being. So Lao-tzu instructs that if you live harmoniously with this simple principle, you’ll be in tune with nature. Let go of a desire to force anyone or anything, and choose instead to consciously be part of the cyclical pattern of nature. Lao-tzu reminds you that not even heaven can sustain a forced action. In its inherent beingness, all action has a temporary existence and returns to a calmer state. In contemporary language, we’d say that “everything blows over.”
Change Your Thoughts—Change Your Life Page 9