by Abbi Glines
Can you leave?
It was a simple text. No explanation. But then yesterday I’d asked him to come get me with no explanation.
Yes.
I hit send, thinking leaving might be harder than yesterday. I wasn’t sure where Dad was, and Hunter would be here any minute. This wasn’t how I wanted to do things with Ryker. If my father would be okay with him just coming to the door, talking a little, and then taking me out, that would be simple. Normal.
Do I pick you up outside?
I hated saying yes. It made me feel like I was hiding him. Hunter was our dad’s project after all. Ryker’s skin color was a ridiculous reason to tell me I wasn’t allowed to see him. His reputation may be an issue, but Dad could talk to him. Would Dad do that? Act like a normal parent and listen to Ryker? Let Ryker promise to respect me, et cetera? I wasn’t Dad’s project child. He had never put his hand in my decisions. He’d only spoken to Denver once. None of this made me feel comfortable telling Ryker to come to the door. I didn’t trust my father. He had lost his last attempt to control me. I wasn’t sure he’d be ready to have me ignore his idea on how I should live my life so soon. I needed some time to deal with him first.
Yes. But just this time. I’m going to change that.
I sent it but wondered how I was going to change that. Shoving that fear aside, I glanced down at my clothes. I was still in what I had worn to school today. Yesterday I hadn’t thought about what I was going to wear when me picked me up. Now it mattered. I was thinking about it. Admitting to myself it was because I couldn’t get the image of Nova out of my mind or the faceless college girl he’d been with recently. It made me feel shallow. Without even meaning to, I had started trying to compete with these girls. Truth was, I couldn’t compete with Nova or the college girl. Not if it came down to sex. I wasn’t ready for that. Not with Denver, who I had dated for years, and definitely not with a guy I had just met. I knew nothing about sex. Except for what I’d read in books.
Ryker was going to have to like me for me. Not because of what I wore or what I was willing to do with my body. Saying that to myself was easy. Remembering it was hard. Because as I glanced in the mirror, I was again thinking I should change. Maybe into some leggings and the off-the-shoulder sweater I had gotten from Mom right before I moved. I hadn’t worn it yet. I was saving it for something special. This wasn’t a date. My guess was we were headed back to the field.
Headlights from Hunter’s truck flashed in the windows, and I sighed. It wasn’t like Ryker was a secret from him, but telling Hunter I was leaving with Ryker was going to lead to another conversation I didn’t want to have.
I’ll be there in 15.
Ryker’s text lit up the screen, and I looked from his words to the new sweater in my closet. Debating hard and forgetting about my brother. Dropping my phone to the bed, I rushed to grab the sweater and change into it before I could decide against this. It was green and matched my eyes. I liked wearing green because of this. Then I chose a pair of black leggings. Quickly I changed out of the jeans and pale blue long-sleeved pullover I’d worn today.
Running a brush through my hair, I studied myself in the mirror and decided to add a little lip gloss. Once I was done with that, I grabbed my black ankle boots and slipped them on. The more I did to myself the more nervous I got. Being attractive to Ryker had suddenly become very important.
My door opened slightly and closed three times. Then he waited. This was how Hunter came to my door. It was his way of asking if he could come in. I walked over and opened the door. My brother took in my appearance, then sighed. He knew where I was going. There was no reason to even ask me.
“You’re going somewhere with Ryker?” He said the words, but I had no doubt he did so silently, and signed at the same time. He wouldn’t want Dad or Ella hearing him. Although Ella probably had no interest in who Ryker was. She didn’t get involved in my life, and from what I could see, she wasn’t at all involved in Hunter’s. But then neither had my mother been involved with Hunter. Dad hadn’t allowed that.
I nodded.
“Dad know?”
He knew Dad didn’t know. If I had told Dad, we would be in the living room right now in a fierce battle, no doubt. Or at least that was what I imagined was going to happen. Hunter was sure Dad wouldn’t be okay with me dating a black boy. He knew him better than anyone. I still had my doubts, because although Dad liked to make decisions for everyone, I’d never witnessed him being racist. Dad was typically charismatic with others. My mother used to explain him that way to others. He just wasn’t that way behind closed doors.
I raised both eyebrows, as if his question was ridiculous, then shook my head. I had taken his word on our dad not accepting Ryker.
Hunter glanced back at the stairs, then signed, “He’s in his office.”
“Good,” I replied, using my voice.
Hunter gave a short nod. “I’ll cover for you if I need to. But be careful.”
I thought that sounded a bit silly. The only person I feared currently was our dad, and that was because I wasn’t like Hunter and never would be. When he realized that, I wasn’t sure how he would react. He had let the cochlear implant thing go a little too easily. I felt like it was sitting there waiting to be tossed out again. Or forced upon me when I least expected it.
“Ryker isn’t going to hurt me,” I replied, shoving those fears aside. I didn’t want to think about it now. Not when I had a date with Ryker. I wanted to enjoy the happy.
Hunter lifted a shoulder. “Just guard your emotions.”
He was being a brother. I understood that. I was also running out of time. Ryker would be here soon. “I need to go,” I told him, but I said so with a smile.
He stepped back and let me go.
I Could Be Her Biggest Mistake
CHAPTER 19
RYKER
My headlights were off, but I knew she saw me parked by the road when she stepped out of the house. Aurora’s pale skin in the moonlight caught my attention, and I saw her left shoulder was bare. It was modest compared to what most of the girls I knew wore, but seeing her shoulder uncovered still made my hands clench the steering wheel a little tighter. She reminded me of an angel . . . and I was closer to the devil. I could be her biggest mistake. It was up to me to make sure I wasn’t. I swallowed and got out of the truck to walk around and open her door.
I might have to hide in the dark to pick her up, but I didn’t like her climbing in my truck without me opening her door and helping her up. My momma wouldn’t like it either. But then she wouldn’t like how we were doing this. She’d be upset that I had to hide.
Aurora smiled up at me when she got to the door I was opening.
“Thank you.” She used her voice again.
I couldn’t say you’re welcome or you’re beautiful or anything because it was too dark for her to see my lips. I took her small hand in mine, and she stepped up into the truck, which I’d had jacked up a little higher than necessary. I wanted to take her by the waist and lift her, but I also didn’t want to startle her. She’d gotten in by herself last night in the rush she had been in, so I knew she could get in without my hands on her body.
Closing the door behind her, I went back to the driver’s seat.
I was going to have to stop staying up late texting with her and start studying sign language. Times like this I could use it. She was just hard to say good night to. I never wanted the conversation to end.
I pulled onto the road and turned toward Nash’s house. I didn’t want to take her to the field again. It felt too much like I was hiding her in the dark. Nash said he was going to be at Tallulah’s until late. His parents were on a cruise. Tallulah’s mom wanted them at her house since his parents weren’t home.
He had his own guy cave over the garage at his house. It had a large flat screen and kitchen, and just recently he’d added a pool table, since he’d rejoined the rest of the living and was not sulking in silence anymore. He had the team over regularly now, an
d the pool table had been an addition his mom thought we could use. All one guy needs.
I had used his place more than once in the past for sex with whoever I was with, but tonight that wasn’t my plan. I had ordered a pizza, wings, and cheese bread that should be delivered in fifteen more minutes. This was more like a date than the field was.
It would also make it easier for us to communicate. That was my main goal. Seeing her face. Watching her smile. Then of course, I wanted to kiss again. She wasn’t someone else’s tonight. She no longer had a boyfriend. No one standing there keeping her from me. That made this more real.
I opened the garage with the remote I had gotten from Nash, wanting to be sure my truck wasn’t seen, so no one would decide to stop by and say hi. Or my dad to stop by and see what I was doing. He’d see Aurora and assume the worst. My parents weren’t as strict about my being alone with girls, but Nash’s dad was tighter on the reins with that. His parents wouldn’t be okay with me having a girl over alone.
I turned to look at her once the garage door closed behind us and I cut off the engine.
“Is this your house?” she asked me, looking a bit surprised but pleased.
I shook my head no. “Nash’s house,” I replied.
Her eyes widened, and she looked around the garage we had parked inside. I knew her mind was working hard to figure out why there was no one here. I opened my door, and I was almost to the other side when her door opened. I moved quickly to take her hand and help her as she stepped down. She studied my face as if the answer to her question was written there.
“Nash has his own place up there,” I said, pointing to the ceiling, then the stairs behind us. “Come on.”
I kept her dainty hand in my much larger one, then squeezed softly to reassure her before leading her to the stairs. I stepped back and motioned for her to go first. She did, and I followed behind, trying not to look at her butt; however, in those leggings it wasn’t easy. I finally just gave in and enjoyed the view until she reached the top step.
When I joined her, I moved in beside her, then opened the door to the apartment. With a wave of my hand I motioned for her to go inside. She looked around, then went through the door as I turned on the lights. The large leather sofa and elaborate setup for a teenager was every guy’s dream. In the beginning this had just been a den for the teenagers when they came over. To get us out of the house. Nash had a bedroom he still used inside the house.
After his injury, though, he’d gotten in a bad depression, and he stayed out here more and more. When he got serious with Tallulah, the sleeping out here ended. Which I thought was a little ridiculous. We were both eighteen now. We’d both be moving in the fall. Going away to college. Nash’s parents needed to decide it was time to trust him to make his own decisions. If he and Tallulah were going to have sex, not letting him sleep out here wasn’t going to stop that. Parents could be naive sometimes. I didn’t know if they’d had sex or not. Nash didn’t talk about that, but I did know I’d caught them in the middle of something where Tallulah had been without a shirt or bra once. I hadn’t looked, but I let him know his dad was right behind me and they needed to get dressed fast.
Aurora finished taking the place in before turning to look at me. “This is nice,” she said softly.
I nodded. “He has a great setup. I ordered pizza, wings, and cheese bread. Have you eaten?”
She smiled then and shook her head no.
“Good. It’s a date, an official one.”
That got a bigger smile from her. Something about making her smile made me feel like a king. If I let myself, I’d stand here and keep saying things to make her smile. I was way too deep with how I felt about her, but I didn’t want her to know that yet. We had a lot to work through first. Instead of embarrassing myself with my stupid jokes and attempts at getting her to laugh, I walked over to the pool table and picked up a stick. “You play?” I figured this was more likely than the video games Nash also had connected to the TV.
She smirked then. The kind of smirk that said I had asked a dumb question. The confident nod of her head surprised me. I watched with appreciation the way she walked toward me and picked up her own stick. I’d thought this would give us something to do. I would get to teach her, possibly, but that didn’t appear to be the case. I wasn’t going to get a chance to stand close behind her. I wasn’t sure if I was impressed or disappointed.
“Rack them.” That was the loudest she’d used her voice with me. I grinned, not just because she seemed so sure of her pool-playing abilities, but also because she was getting braver with me. Trusting me with her voice.
I wanted to grab her, pull her against me, and kiss that sexy smirk off her face. It was hard not to. Keeping my hands off her was a constant struggle, it seemed. But this was a date. Our first one. Kissing her the entire time was not how I wanted her to remember it. I wanted her to have fun. I wanted to laugh with her. I didn’t want her to think I’d brought her up here to get in her pants. Which was normally why I brought girls up here. Okay, it was the only reason I had brought girls up here in the past.
This being-a-gentleman thing was foreign to me, but I thought I was doing a pretty damn good job of it so far. I did as she had instructed and got us racked when the doorbell outside the garage door went off. My head jerked up to look at the door, confused for a second, and then I realized it was the pizza. I’d forgotten about our food.
“Food is here. I’ll be right back,” I told her so she’d understand where I was going suddenly.
I ran down the stairs, wanting to hurry and get this over with before someone saw the delivery car outside. When I opened the back door, Rifle was standing there with the food. I hadn’t known he was working at the Pizza Slab. This was the first time he’d delivered my food.
“I was expecting Nash,” Rifle said with a smile, handing me the order as he pulled it out of the heated packaging.
“I’m borrowing the place tonight,” I told him. “Thanks,” I added, then handed him a tip.
“Thank you,” he said with a pleased grin at the cash in his hand. I started to step back and close the door when he asked, “Hey, I saw you with Aurora Maclay today a few times. Are you seeing her?”
I paused. Rifle was a junior like Aurora and a good friend of Hunter’s. He was also on the team, but we weren’t close. “Why?” I asked him, unsure how to handle this question. If it was up to me, I’d say yes. But I didn’t know what Aurora wanted me to say.
He started to reply when his eyes lifted to look at the top of the stairs behind me. The surprise in his expression had me turning my head to look back. Aurora was standing there. She obviously had no idea what we were saying or the fact that Rifle had seen her might be an issue. I expected Hunter to show up within the hour.
“Not your business, bro,” I warned him.
He jerked his gaze back to me and gave a sharp nod of understanding.
“If her brother shows up here, I’ll know why.” I made sure he understood that the threat in my voice was real.
His eyes widened, and he nodded again. “Thanks for the tip,” he said quickly, and all but ran back to his car to get away from me.
I closed the door and locked it before heading back up the stairs to the waiting Aurora.
“Where is the bathroom?” she asked me once we were back inside the apartment.
I pointed to the door behind her and she smiled shyly, then went to use it.
I had to decide if I should tell her and let her be nervous and worried that Hunter could possibly show up. I wasn’t sure if Rifle would take my threat seriously or not. Ruining our evening over a possibility that Hunter might show up would suck.
I Wanted to Feel Your Laugh
CHAPTER 20
AURORA
That had been Hunter’s friend, Rifle. I remembered meeting him. Thinking how weird that name was. I stood looking in the mirror while fighting the urge to bite my nails. If he told Hunter I was here, it was very possible Hunter would show up and
cause a scene. If he knew about this private den of Nash’s, he’d assume the worst. Hunter said he was okay with me seeing Ryker and would cover for me if he could, but I doubted that he’d be okay with my being here alone with him. I’d seen the surprise in Rifle’s face when he recognized me.
When we had come here instead of somewhere in town, I realized Ryker was trying to make this a real date, but also respecting the fact I was sneaking around to see him. He should be insulted by the fact he even had to see me secretly. I was insulted for him. I didn’t like hiding or running outside in the dark to get in his truck. I shouldn’t have to do that. After tonight I was telling my dad about this. He’d have to accept my dating Ryker and deal with it. That all sounded a lot easier than it would actually be.
I took a deep breath and ran my hand through my hair to smooth it, then smiled at my bare, freckled shoulder. I liked this look. I had seen Ryker looking at my skin too. He liked it. Feeling better and ready to face my brother if that was what happened, I stepped back out of the bathroom and found Ryker opening the boxes of food up on the bar.
His back was to me, and I let myself admire the way he looked in jeans from behind. His wide shoulders stretched the fabric of the pale blue cotton shirt he was wearing. He was tall, and so big it should make him intimidating, but his smile made you forget his size. My brother was tall, but he was more lean. He certainly didn’t have the muscles bulging in his arms the way Ryker did. The sleeves were tight on his biceps much like his shoulders.
He turned then, and I knew my cheeks heated at being caught checking him out. The cocky grin on his face as he realized I had been looking at him made me want to laugh. Ryker Lee had no self-esteem issues. That was for sure. He oozed confidence. It was attractive on him. He made it charming somehow instead of obnoxious, like so many guys appeared.