by Kati Wilde
“It’s good.” She gives a soft cry as I fuck into her again, and her hand comes up to her mouth as if to silence herself before she reaches up and touches my lips, instead. “It’s so good.”
So goddamn good. I suck her fingers into my mouth, and her entire body arches up, her inner walls twitching around my cock like she’s got an electric wire running from her fingers to her cunt. Her pale gaze is locked on mine, and I remember the first time I imagined fucking her. How I believed she’d be still and silent, and thought I’d have to hammer into her just to crack the ice, to make her pussy melt around me.
But she’s not ice. She’s a living flame beneath me, hot and bright and so damn beautiful.
She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
“Oh my god. Caleb.” Writhing against my grip, she makes a little sobbing noise in the back of her throat. “It’s so deep. I’m so full.”
With a laughing groan, I drive into her again. “It’s going to feel a lot fuller and deeper when you marry me.”
Almost dazedly, as if confused by my meaning, she lifts her head. Her eyes widen when she sees how much of my cock she hasn’t taken.
“All the way.” It’s a breathless command. Her fingers slide up to fist in my hair. “Inside me all the way.”
Not yet, goddammit. I’m supposed to be opening her up. Teeth clenched, I fuck into her on hard, shallow strokes until there’s nothing left of her demand, just soft ragged cries and her cunt cinching tighter and tighter. Almost ready to come. Fuck, I’m barely holding on myself, pressure boiling at the root of my cock. Grunting with every short thrust, I wait until her thighs begin to tremble uncontrollably before giving her what she wants. What I need.
And Christ Almighty, there is nothing in the universe as close to heaven as her pussy. The world dims around me as I give her the full length of my cock, until the only light is Audrey, clinging to me with her fists clenched in my hair, her body arched upward in a tight bow, her eyes glazed and unseeing.
So close but still not there. I wedge my hand between us, and the first brush of my fingertips over her clit makes her shudder and exhale a soft, sobbing breath. I’m balls-deep inside her, my body motionless except for my fingers teasing that sensitive bundle of nerves.
“You feel so damn good, baby,” I growl against her mouth. “Like your cunt was made to take my cock. Like it was made for me to fuck and fill with cum.”
“Oh god. Please.”
I know she’s begging for me to start thrusting but I shake my head, kissing her again. “I’m not fucking you now. I’m just opening up every fuckable inch of this virgin pussy.”
Her inner walls clench around me and she cries out, her feet rubbing up and down the back of my thighs as she desperately tries to find some leverage. “But I need it.”
So do I. “You want this big cock pumping into you, making you feel good? That’s what you’ll get every day, after you marry me.”
“Please.”
Harder, faster, I rub her slippery clit. “You like me this deep?”
“Yes.” She squirms beneath me on another sobbing breath. “I love it.”
Love. The word flares through me like a wildfire, setting my soul ablaze.
“Say that again,” I demand hoarsely.
“I love it, I love it, I love it.”
Her steady chant fills my heart to bursting. It’s not the only love I need from her. But it’s a damn good start.
I steal another kiss from her lips, then a longer taste as I begin to grind my hips in a tight circle between her trembling thighs, my cock screwing deep within the luscious grip of her body. Her fingernails dig into my shoulders and her strangled cry is muffled by our kiss, but she doesn’t break away, her hot tongue slicking over mine as her inner walls begin contracting around my thick length.
It’s fucking exquisite. And sheer torture. A harsh groan ripping from my chest, I struggle against the intense rising pressure of my own release as her pussy milks every inch of my cock. Then I grind harder, because I can’t stop. I need more time inside her, need to savor every moment that she’s climaxing around me.
One more second is all I get before the orgasm snaps through my spine like a whip. I grunt, my head jerking back and my hips jolting forward as if to drive my erection even deeper into her, but there’s no deeper. Hot pulses of semen spill into her clenching depths as I come so hard that spots dance around the edges of my vision, and there’s only Audrey at the center of it all. At the center of everything. My heart, my soul, my life.
I empty myself into her, all that I have, and I come for what feels like years.
It must be at least next Christmas before I stop. Completely spent, I barely keep myself from collapsing over her and crushing her slender body beneath my heavy bulk. It requires all the strength I have left to roll onto my back and bring her with me, until she’s lying atop my heaving chest with my dick still buried inside her quivering cunt. Lifting my head, I meet her lips in a kiss that’s all jagged breaths and slick heat, then slowly pull her up higher until her legs are straddling my waist and her mouth is directly over mine. She moans softly as my softening cock slips out of her, and I groan at the wickedly dirty sensation of our combined release dripping from her pussy onto my stomach.
Her mouth curves against mine and, with a slow and deliberate rock of her hips, smears a little more all over my abdomen. So filthy and hot and unexpected—but I should expect it by now. She always pays attention to what I like, in bed and out of it.
She’s so fucking perfect. So incredible. And not a virgin anymore. I catch her face in my hands, looking up at her with my heart damn near beating through my chest.
“All good?” I ask gruffly.
She nods, then hesitates for a moment before venturing, “And you?”
The uncertainty in that question spins my head around. “Real damn good, baby,” I reassure her, then pause as the sound of pounding bass and a few shouts of laughter come faintly through the bedroom wall. “Did you want to go back to the party or…?”
She shakes her head. “I’m tired after coming so many times. Can I nap here?”
I grin, not a bit surprised by that answer. Orgasms often wipe her out. “Yeah, you can.”
“Okay.” She lays her head on my shoulder, as if settling in, before popping back up again. “Are you staying with me or going back to the party?”
“Staying.” Of course I’m staying with her. I slide my palm down her back, urging her to settle again. “I’m working again tomorrow morning. I don’t need two late nights in a row.”
“Okay,” she says again, but doesn’t settle. Instead she wriggles around, then sits up and slips her fingers between her legs. “I’m really sticky. I need to—”
“Lie right here while I get a washcloth and clean you up.”
“I can—”
“I know.” With a quick kiss to her mouth, I roll her over—away from the wet spot. “But I wasn’t supposed to get into you that deep tonight, let alone come up inside you. That’s my mess making you all sticky, so I’ll clean it up.”
And if there’s any more blood, I can quietly take care of it so she won’t panic when she sees it.
Maybe Audrey’s already thinking the same, though, because her gaze seems troubled as she watches me head for the bathroom. When I return with a washcloth in hand, she’s scooted up to the far end of the bed with her back against the headboard and hugging her bent knees to her chest.
“Audrey?” Worry clutches my throat. “What’s going on?”
Her eyes seem dark and haunted now. “You shouldn’t be so sweet to me.”
“Why’s that?” I kneel on the mattress in front of her, and relief slips through my chest when she doesn’t stiffen or pull away from my touch. Gently I part her knees so I can begin cleaning her up. “I like being sweet to you. So tell me why I shouldn’t be.”
“Because of what I just did to manipulate you.”
Manipulate me? My eyebrows shoot upward. “Wh
at’d you do?”
Maybe she tossed away her birth control? If so, screw cleaning her up. In ten seconds flat I’ll have her on her back and pumped full of more cum.
Her chin quivers. “I already asked for so much. You wanted to wait for our wedding night but I needed this from you, and you gave it.”
I meet her gaze and make sure she can hear the truth ringing through every word as I say, “And I was real fucking happy to give it.”
“But you didn’t want to have sex tonight. You weren’t going to fuck me. That’s what you said. But I…” Her breath shudders and a sheen of moisture glitters in her eyes. “When it felt good instead of hurting, I wanted you inside me again. So I said you weren’t deep enough and that you hadn’t done what you promised. And you fucked me. Even though you wanted to wait. Because I pressured you and pressured you for more, but I shouldn’t have even asked for it. I should have respected what you wanted.”
Ah hell. If it weren’t for those tears, I might have laughed. Not at Audrey, but at the idea that she took something I didn’t want to give.
But it isn’t difficult to see where her fear is coming from. She’s got power and money like most people only dream of, and she has to be careful how to wield it. That caution has to influence the way she approaches sex, especially with all that’s going on in the world right now. Because she’s talking about this like she could pressure me.
Maybe she could pressure a lot of other people. But those people aren’t me. So she’s got the context all wrong.
“Three things, baby,” I tell her, wiping the cloth up the inside of her thigh as I continue to clean her up. “The first is that you couldn’t make me do anything I didn’t feel like doing. I’m the same as you that way. You won’t go to a party or do shit you don’t want to, and I don’t do shit that I don’t want to. That includes fucking someone. And you weren’t manipulating me. I knew damn well what you were playing at and I thought it was adorable and sexy and flattering as hell, knowing you wanted me that bad. But if I hadn’t wanted to go along with it, I wouldn’t have. The second thing is that the moment I realized you weren’t hurting, there was no fucking way I could have resisted getting into you. I’ve told you that, too. I kept my jeans on for over a week because I knew the second my bare cock got anywhere near your pussy, I was going in deep. Only you saying no or being in pain would have stopped me. But you weren’t. So you could have been silent the entire time and I still would have given in to temptation and opened you up all the way. All right?”
Her breath shudders as if in relief when she nods. “And the third thing?”
“That wasn’t us having sex. That wasn’t us fucking. That wasn’t us making love.” Which will include all of the above. “That was just me opening you up and doing my damn best to make it sexy for you. But on our wedding night, and every time after that, I’ll be doing a hell of a lot more than drilling halfway into your pussy a few times and then busting my nut. But you’ll just have to wait to see the difference.”
“I will.” With her soft fingers, she touches my face, tracing the line of my jaw. “You’re such a good man, Caleb.”
My heart swells up into my throat. Because if she thinks that, maybe her loving me someday isn’t impossible. Catching her hand, I press a kiss to her palm. “I just want to be good for you, Audrey. So that you don’t ever regret marrying the bastard who lied to you and hurt you before figuring out what an incredible woman you are. Because by all rights, you should still be angry at me.”
“I was never angry. And I won’t regret it.” A shadow darkens her eyes. “I hope you don’t, either.”
“Not a chance,” I tell her, finishing up with the washcloth and tossing it onto the nightstand. “Still sleepy?”
She nods and slips under the covers, but despite me saying that I won’t regret marrying her, the shadow doesn’t leave her face.
“Was there something else bothering you, baby?”
She doesn’t shake her head. Doesn’t answer. She just pillows her cheek on my shoulder.
Because she can’t lie well. So she doesn’t say anything.
Which means there is something else.
My throat is tight as I turn out the light. Holding her close, I try to breathe past the ache in my heart. Maybe my question was too general. There’s probably a ton of shit that bothers her, but not anything she wants to share.
But general shit didn’t put that shadow in her eyes. Something we were talking about here did. “There’s nothing you want to tell me?”
This time I feel the shake of her head, but the subsequent silence rips at my chest. Until she whispers, “I just want to be with you.”
And all the pain goes away.
12
Caleb
I don’t know what begins waking me up but I know what brings me all the way out: a soft press of lips to mine. Then another.
Audrey, kissing me while she thinks I’m asleep.
I don’t even breathe. Eyes closed, I wait about thirty seconds for her to do more. But there’s nothing. And she’s no longer lying beside me.
Frowning, I sit up. The bedroom’s dark. The bathroom light isn’t on, so she’s not in there. But she’s easy to find. As soon as I leave the bedroom, the flashlight from her phone guides me straight to her. The device is lying on top of a box—giving her light to see by as she dresses. Already wearing her sweater, she’s standing by the front door and zipping up her skirt. Dismay flashes over her beautiful face when she sees me.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up.”
I’m glad she did. Scrubbing my hand over my face, I glance at the clock.
Only one-thirty. The noise from outside tells me the party’s still going. I figured it must be morning but only two hours have passed since we went to sleep. “Are you heading back over to Patrick’s?”
“Just to get my coat.” She balances on one foot while pulling on a boot. “I called for a driver to take me home. She’s out there now.”
“I could have taken you home, baby.”
“You have work in the morning.”
“You do, too,” I point out.
“Not really. Mia’s treating me to a spa day tomorrow. Polishing me up”—she huffs out a breath while pulling on her other boot—“so I can look pretty for the wedding.”
“I honest-to-God can’t imagine you being any more beautiful than you are right now.” The delight that fills her expression vanishes as I add, “You should stay until morning. You’ll get more sleep that way. And I’ll drive you wherever you need to go before work tomorrow.”
She averts her face. Her ponytail’s down, and her blonde curtain of hair partially veils her expression. “You never stay the night at my house. So I just… It feels like I should go, too.”
Ah fuck. She likes personal interactions to have context and guidelines. And from the very first day, she’s been figuring out the rules for an engaged couple, taking many of her cues from me. But some of those rules I didn’t mean to establish.
Like this one. My chest is tight as I tell her, “I just didn’t trust myself to wait until the wedding if I slept all night in your bed.”
“Do you trust yourself now?”
No. But I still want her there. Next to me.
Under me.
Goddammit. “I want to say yes, just so you’ll stay. But I’m not going to be an asshole and lie to you.” For an instant, she looks utterly devastated and her expression nearly rips my heart out. “I never wanted to go.”
“But you did anyway.”
I can’t refute that, so I try a different angle. “Do you want to stay? You can if you want to.”
She wants to. A wistful expression passes over her face. Then she shakes her head and picks up her phone, using the light to find the front door handle. “That’s what I always said. And you always left, anyway.”
Shit. I’m such a fucking asshole. “Baby, give me a second to put on pants and I’ll walk you over.”
“I’ll be fi
ne.”
“I know you will—” Screw getting dressed, because she’s not stopping. Buck naked, I follow her through the door and onto the landing. She stops then, eyes widening as the flashlight beam dances over my cock. Quickly she turns it off, but thanks to the floodlight over the garage door, anyone could still see us up here. Despite the noise coming from the patio, though, I doubt anyone’s looking. And I wouldn’t give a shit if they did.
All that matters is that she’s laughing now. “Caleb, it’s snowing out here!”
With an icy wind that’s already freezing my balls. Since she’s not wearing a coat, I won’t keep her long. Just long enough to wrap my arm around her waist and pull her close. “The next time I see you, we’ll be at the church.”
Her eyes soften. “Yes.”
“And the next time I talk to you, I’ll be saying ‘I do.’”
She makes a happy sound in her throat and rises up on her toes. Her mouth is sweet and warm beneath mine, and the sheer pleasure of kissing her almost makes me forget where I was going with all this. But as soon as she pulls away and says a quiet goodnight, I remember.
Catching her hand, I press a kiss to her palm. “As soon as we’re married, we won’t be engaged anymore. We’ll be husband and wife. And we’ll hit the reset button, all right? We’ll kiss hello and goodbye, and spend all night together. No gimmicks, no stupid assumptions that’ll hurt you, no more waiting for anything. We’ll have a clean start to this marriage. Yeah?”
Her eyes seem to glitter extra bright. “A clean start,” she whispers. “Okay.”
“Good.” With another kiss to her cold fingers, I let her go. “I’m going to stay up here until I see you make it into the house. Then text me when you’re in the car and when you get home safe.”
She bites her lip and nods, her gaze searching my face before she turns and runs down the stairs. Her pale hair seems to glow in the dark as she crosses the lawn.