by Cari Quinn
“I just think using artificial light makes the bar look weird.”
“Weird? It makes it look like it’s not a rundown hole in the wall!”
Nick’s bald head turned cherry. “My bar is a rundown hole in the wall?”
Jen clapped a hand over her mouth, her eyes wide. “That’s not what I meant, Nick. It came out wrong.”
Nick’s blue eyes tinged with red. “I think you should go.”
“Nick—”
“No. I’m going to go smoke a cigarette. You should be gone when I get back.”
Nick stalked to the door, brushing violently past Val. He threw open the double doors, the loud bang when they hit the walls echoing through the place. Val glanced back at Jen. She still stood where he’d left her. Her white skin had paled, leaving her almost alabaster white. Two pink roses dotted her cheeks but that was the only color on her. Her hands shook as she clutched the long support of the klieg light.
She swallowed once, then twice. Then something came over her face, a resolve. Her jaw set in determined, silent anger. She squared her shoulders and set to work putting her equipment away.
Val sighed. “Jen…”
“It’s fine, Val. He wants to be an asshole and be stuck in his ways, then that’s his prerogative.” She wrenched the zipper on the camera case shut. She slung it over her shoulder. “Doesn’t mean I have to sit around and let him be an asshole to me.” She glanced around at the bigger equipment she had around the bar. “I’m going to have my assistant Mike pick up the big pieces when he gets back from the store. Let Nick know, okay?”
Val nodded. “If you need anything…”
Jen laughed. “Oh, Val, you’re so sweet. I’m not the one that needs help.” She flipped her strawberry blonde hair from her shoulders. She frowned. “Didn’t you just break up with that hockey dude?”
“We were never—I mean, we didn’t…” Val pursed her lips together. She didn’t have a word for what they had been. Wild. Uncontrollable. Spontaneous. All the things she hated.
“Hockey players aren’t all that bad, you know? I dated one once.” Jen smiled. “They’re pretty nice. They get all the aggression in their bodies out on the ice. But… they’re determined. You could do worse.” She glanced toward the double doors, which had almost stopped swinging. Val recognized the longing in her expression. It was the same way she felt when she saw Darren.
“Do you want me to talk to Nick?”
Jen’s eyes slid from the doors back to Val. “And say what? Nick made his decision. He’d rather be butt hurt because I insulted his bar than actually let me do my job and make him and his bar look amazing.” A slow, sad smile crept up over her face. “And it would be amazing. There’s so much of his personality here, woven deep into the infrastructure of this place.” Her tears misted, a wall of tears threatening to fall. Then as quickly as they’d formed, she blinked them away and heaved a relieving sigh. “Well, gonna go. See ya ’round, Val.”
Valerie said goodbye absently, watching the woman as she left. It seemed breakups were suddenly the thing to do.
* * *
Darren turned into the hospital parking lot, shifting his eyes from left to right to locate a free parking spot. Cody’s fingers drummed along the edge of his thigh where his arm rested.
“Thanks for driving, D.” Cody’s deep voice strained its way through the words.
He hadn’t realized how deeply Cody had been affected by Joey’s frequent trips to the doctor lately. She hadn’t wanted to talk about it either, which had strung his friend tighter. But Cody was good at hiding things, and his game wasn’t affected by his personal life. Darren only wished he could claim as much.
He parked in an empty spot and turned off the engine. “It’s all good.”
Offering to drive Cody to the hospital wasn’t just a Good Samaritan thing to do. Cody hadn’t been physically capable of driving. The days of worrying about Joey were wearing on him. And Darren needed his own distraction from women. One woman, actually.
Walking into the hospital, Darren led Cody take the lead. He went straight to the front desk, where the woman there directed him to the adjoining office building. With the look of sheer concentration on his face, Darren didn’t want to disrupt whatever auto flow Cody was on. He just let the man go and trailed behind.
The silence stretched as long as the hallway in the office building. At the end of the hallway, the double doors opened up into a waiting area. The three women seated there stared at them strangely as Cody walked up to the receptionist.
“Hi, there. What can I help you with?” The older woman in scrubs smiled at the two of them.
“Here for Josephina Baker. She’s my wife.”
“Oh, right, she said you would be coming.” She waved to the other woman across the room. “Jane, would you take Mr. Baker back?”
Darren glanced around at the waiting area. Two women had returned to reading magazines, while the third, a very pregnant young woman, had her tablet propped on her stomach.
“Can my friend come back too?” Cody asked. Darren nearly groaned. He had no desire to be in the back side of the office, where all the medically things happen. But Cody turned toward him as the receptionist agreed, his eyes bright and hopeful.
* * *
Darren couldn’t feel more awkward. Why had he thought coming back was a good idea? He crossed his arms and stood in the corner of the exam room.
The gynecologist.
Joey was seeing her lady parts doctor. Darren concentrated on the wall, with the diagram of a woman’s uterus with the different stages of a baby growing in it. It was better than seeing his best friend’s wife on the exam table in stirrups. Cody looked absolutely nervous. He wondered if that’s what it felt like to be married.
The doctor strode in, pausing for a second as he zeroed in on Darren, but said nothing to him as he made his way over to Joey and Cody. “So, we did the test, and it’s positive. Congratulations, guys.”
Cody’s face paled, but it was tan compared to Joey. Her fingers were clenched so tightly around the edge of the exam table, that her tips were white, her knuckles drained of color. She shook her head. “That’s not possible. We—I take birth control.”
“Well, nothing is one hundred percent effective. I’d like for you to come back next week for blood work and labs. It looks like you’re about seven weeks, so we’ll need to do an ultrasound in two or three weeks as well.”
“Wait, wait, wait… Pregnant? A baby?” Joey’s face looked pained, confused.
“Honey, you see when the sperm travels up the vagina…”
“Shut your mouth, Cody Baker. This is all your fault!” She cried out. “You’re fertile!”
Darren snorted and left the exam room, because if he stayed and listened to Cody’s yammering, he was going to have trouble breathing through all the laughing. He brushed past the nurses in the hallway until he made it into the waiting area. Two of the women in the waiting room had gone, leaving him alone with the young pregnant one.
She scrutinized him for a minute, then rested her tablet across her stomach. “Aren’t you Darren Moran? The hockey player?”
Darren nearly cursed, but outwardly, he smiled and nodded. “I am.”
“I read you got a divorce. What are you doing here?”
As if it was any of her business, he thought bitterly. This was something that Angela had taken away from him. Maybe not permanently, but she’d definitely ruined all the plans they’d made together, left him with a house fit for kids, but with none. What the hell did he need with a five bedroom mansion?
“A friend. Uh, dropping off a friend. His wife is here.”
“Cool.” She smiled and rubbed her belly. “I wish my boyfriend would want to come here.”
“He doesn’t?” Darren asked. He looked over the girl again, realizing she was about ten years younger than he’d originally thought. Way too young for babies.
“No. He’s… busy.” She smiled bravely. The tightness of her smile, alo
ng with the fight to stay bright and perky he saw in her expression made him want to find the guy that made her upset and beat the shit out of him. “It’s okay. My mom drives me here. She’ll pick me up in a few minutes now.”
“Oh, so you’re already done with your appointment?” He waved towards the reception area.
“Oh, yeah. I’m just waiting for my mom now.”
Darren fell into silence, his momentary depression lifting. “I’m sorry, I didn’t get your name.”
“Karina,” she said. “You know, my boyfriend used to play hockey. Like when he was a kid. But he was really bad at it.”
“He should really be here for you,” Darren said in a soft voice, then snapped his mouth shut. That wasn’t something he should have said.
“I kinda like it this way,” she said, smiling. “He’s not ready to be a dad. And so I’d rather him go be wherever than be a lousy dad to my kid, you know?” She shrugged. “I was going to this center that was going to teach me how to take care of my kid, and how to take care of myself… but it’s not worth it any more. The one person I really liked there doesn’t work there anymore and there’s this super weird old guy running around. He sweats a lot.”
“The Fort Glasgow Teen Outreach?” Darren asked.
“Yeah, how’d you know?”
“I have a friend who used to work there.” Darren smiled. “Valerie Chase?”
“Oh, I love her!” Karina’s eyes lit up. “I was so sad when she left!”
Darren pulled out his wallet and grabbed a business card. It was one of Jenkins’ cards, actually. Someday, he’d do his own. He scribbled his phone number on the back of the card and held it out. “That’s got my cell on it. Call me later this week. Maybe I can get you some tickets to a game or something.”
Karina grinned broadly. “That sounds awesome! Thanks so much!”
He nodded. They talked a while longer until Karina’s mom showed up. When Cody and Joey came out of the back rooms, Darren followed the two out.
The tension between them was thick, quiet anger hanging over them like a fog blanket. He’d have thought there would be more joy at having a child, but neither seemed like they were celebrating.
Joey stalked off toward her car, leaving the two men alone.
“I’m going home with Joey.”
“What about your car?”
Cody shrugged, looking over at his wife’s retreating back. “I’ll get it later.”
“Are you guys okay?” Darren asked. He’d not have asked normally, but he considered Joey a friend as well. She’d been there for him during the divorce like Cody had, maybe even more. Like Val, she’d talked to him about the divorce for hours. Let him vent. Comforted him. Things that Cody couldn’t have done.
He didn’t like the idea that she might not be around or that she was unhappy.
“Honestly? I don’t know, bro.” Cody replied. “I’ll see ya.” Cody walked away before Darren could say another word. He watched Cody silently get in their vehicle, a Dodge Ram, and drove away. It seemed like everything was crumbling down.
Chapter Fifteen
Valerie took a deep breath. Glancing across the bar, she tapped her fingernails on the countertop. They were just customers. They came in all the time. She shouldn’t be nervous and scared of them. The problem was that she knew them now, and they were Darren’s friends.
Talk about awkward.
“Shouldn’t you be minding your tables?” Nick teased.
“I am.” Her voice came out unsure and squeaky.
Nick rolled his eyes. “Right. I can tell by how you’re standing there not taking care of your tables.”
“Fuck off, Nick.” Valerie spat. She’d go over there… eventually.
“Why are you still working here again?”
“Why? Are you trying to get rid of me?”
“No,” Nick drew out the word a beat or two. “I was thinking you have that fancy new high-paying job with the hockey team.”
“I know.”
“So?”
“What if it doesn’t last, Nick?” Valerie asked, glancing briefly at the hockey players. “What if Vince Jenkins decides I’m too much of a distraction for his player?”
“Then he’d be a stupid asshat.” Nick stopped what he was doing and faced her. “I know this whole job thing was rough on you. You know you’re welcome here anytime.”
“You’re awesome, Nick.”
“Yeah, don’t make me fire you to get you moving on with your life.”
Val glared at Nick, hiding the surprise inside her chest. “You wouldn’t.” She loved Nick, but his idea of being comfortable was way different than hers.
“It’s time for you to let go and enjoy the new job. If the man wanted to take away your job, he’d have said something by now. It’s been a couple weeks now. He hasn’t been here either.”
Val’s heart sunk to her stomach. It was true. Darren had said he could have headed off her interview. And he hadn’t. In fact, in the last couple weeks, he’d gone out of his way to give her space and be professional with her. They’d had no contact that didn’t have to deal with an employee of the Highlander organization. It was both what she wanted and what she hated.
“I’m not ready yet, Nick.” She cleared her throat and deliberately changed the subject. “So, have you talked to Zoey since she went back to school?”
Nick grunted as he pulled a couple pint glasses from the shelf. “Last night. She yelled at me.”
“Why?”
“She says I’m being an asshole to Jen by not talking to her.”
“What do you think?” Val had to admit. She loved Nick, but he was being sensitive about it.
Nick stopped, glared at Valerie and shook his finger at her. “Stop analyzing me.”
“I just asked a question.”
“Whatever. Jen and I are done.” He walked over to the beer taps and poured two Shiners. He set them on the counter with more force than he’d probably intended. “She called my bar a rundown hole in the wall.”
“Really? You’re butt hurt over that?” Valerie laughed. “People have called you far worse things and you’re upset over that?”
“Fuck off,” Nick spat. Sullen anger slammed into his expression. Valerie sighed, regretting laughing at her best friend.
“I’m sorry, Nick. But it’s just a bar.”
“The Penalty Box isn’t just a bar.” He turned to face her. “I built this place. It’s mine. It’s part of me. Her saying that…” Nick huffed. “I bought this place after Zoey’s mom left. It’s more me than I am.”
“So by insulting the bar, you feel like she insulted you?” Val’s heart softened, the beats getting slow and laborious. “That wasn’t her intention.”
“I know. But it’s not something I can forgive either.”
“Nick, is that really the problem?”
He narrowed his eyes. “Are you analyzing me again?”
“No. Just asking a question.” Val put up her hands in mock surrender. She’d much rather deal with Nick’s problems than her own.
“I don’t know.” He glanced over at the hockey players. “Want me to send Tiffany over there instead?”
“No.” Valerie shook her head like she was an automaton. Back and forth. Back and forth. “If I switch sections with her, they’ll know. That’s always my table.” Oh, how she wanted to do it, though. Seeing them reminded her too much of Darren. Seeing the striking Gavin reminded her of that first night at the yogurt shop when Darren had kissed her.
How far would it have gone that night if they hadn’t been interrupted? Would she have slept with him that night? Would she have let herself go so easily? Even posing the question she knew the answer.
She hadn’t possessed the capacity then to let loose and do things that would be fun and enjoyable. She was learning now. But she had months ahead of her before she’d be financially stable. But would she ever be at a place where she was truly happy?
* * *
Valerie approached
the table with trepidation, holding three pint glasses that she set down slowly. She didn’t have to ask them what they were drinking. She already knew. Gavin was an import guy. He was especially fond of Foster’s. Misha drank anything with alcohol in it that was cheap. Leo was a Shiner fan. He didn’t come in nearly as much as the other guys did, but he was regular in what he chose.
None of that clear routineness of their drinking patterns soothed her nerves, however. They were still all Darren’s teammates and friends and she was still the woman who hurt him. Was she any different than Angela in their eyes?
The group’s attention turned to her and she swore they were already judging her. Gavin was the first to break the uncomfortable silence. “Hi, Val. How’s it hanging?”
“Good, actually. How’s your sister?” Gavin’s sister Maddie was a national figure skater. She’d been gone for months. But that was apparently normal. She traveled a lot to competitions.
“She’s good. Nationals are coming up. She’s been training hard.” Gavin grinned widely, obviously proud of the success his sister had experienced. “I didn’t think you would be working here anymore.”
“Just need to get some things under control first. I’m in my last two weeks.” That last part was a lie. She hadn’t given notice at all, but in her mind, this is what she believed. Nick was right. It was time for her to move on. The moving on part was scary.
“So you’re staying with the Highlanders?” Misha asked.
“Yeah,” Val replied. “Yeah, I think so.”
“Are you gonna talk to D about it?”
Valerie frowned. “I don’t think Darren should have anything to say about my career.”
“He might be upset.” Misha looked almost fearful. He was so young, he’d probably didn’t even shave yet. But the girls seemed to like that baby face.
“Hey, guys, I’m here for beer. Not to play matchmaker.” Leo told the other two, annoyed. He picked up the Shiner she’d set on the table and sipped, his eyes on the TV screen close by.
“You’re an ass, Vasquez.” Gavin snapped.
“You like it.” Leo grinned at him, and turned back to the TV. He kicked the back of Misha’s chair. “Move your big head, rookie.”